


Moving Forward

by WindInYourSail



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: ... like a year earlier, Amanda likes Sonny, And supportive, Barba's happy, Barba’s supportive, Carisi starts a little earlier than on the show, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, Flirting, Fluff and Smut, I just prefer to write him with people less serious, I like staying true to the timeline..., I was never against the idea of Barson on the show, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Liv is a close friend, Nick and Amanda are something..., Rollins is annoyed, Rollins is the best friend, Sarcasm, Seriously Barba can be cute, again by her ex not Barba, but still Barba, by her ex not Barba, more playful to balance his work life, niether want more, oh well, she isn’t jealous, she just has a hard time admitting it, she just likes to tease, this kind of bugs me, truthfully I just like creating characters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-14
Updated: 2019-08-29
Packaged: 2019-09-17 20:28:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 35
Words: 100,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16981269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WindInYourSail/pseuds/WindInYourSail
Summary: Katherine Morgan moves from Atlanta to New York after visiting her former college roommate.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because every time I try to work on an existing story I stare at a blinking cursor, but this... this just rambles out.
> 
> I’m formatting my writing, mostly the dialogue, differently. I haven’t done it this way in the past because I’m strange and don’t like the double spaced look you’re restricted to on here, but I do think the dialogue is easier to read this way. I also don’t like that you can’t indent... I mean I could use a few spaces where I wanted to indent but that seemed a bit much considering the time it would take.
> 
> ***At around 21 chapters in I decided to start adding a picture at the beginning of each chapter... if I can find a picture I like for said chapter... I’ve never done this before and probably wont again, but The Path has given me so many photos to work with for this particular story. That and I always use a picture for inspiration when describing where Barba or my original character lives. I will add pictures to older chapters as I find ones I like. I originally pictured Katherine more like Lauren Cohen, but Michelle Monaghan works too... I’ve described Scott with a receding hair line so just pretend Aaron Paul has one...***

 

Katherine sat curled in a ball in the corner of their home office, crying, hoping her husband wouldn’t find her. She didn’t want to talk anymore. Didn’t want to argue. She’d never win anyway, he’d never allow that. It didn’t matter what they argued about, he was right and she was wrong. Always. Truthfully, she just wanted to be left alone to work through the latest blow to her self worth without her husbands critical voice resonating in her ears. 

“Kate!” Scott barked as he entered the room she was cowering in, “Great... you’re crying again.”

“Can you just leave me alone?” She sighed.

“Fine, you want to be left alone? I’ll leave.” He huffed, storming out of the house.

Katherine flinched as the door slammed. When she heard the car start and tires squealing as he pulled out of the driveway, her whole body almost instantly relaxed. Deep down she knew this wasn’t right. That you shouldn’t be happier when the person you were married to left. Scott hadn’t always been this way... a little stubborn maybe but not unyielding like he was now. It had happened slowly over time and seemed like one day she realize she couldn’t disagree with him without it turning into a fight. They didn’t fight everyday but it was becoming a more frequent occurrence. He was never physically abusive but Katherine was pretty sure he was emotionally abusive. Not that she dared talked to anyone about it so she was only going off what she had googled on the subject. All she knew is she no longer felt like the self assured woman she once was. That somehow over the last three years of marriage she had put on twenty pounds, something that didn’t go without comment. Half the time she thought she was crazy and possibly overreacting, finding herself apologizing for arguments she knew she didn’t start just to keep the peace.

 

Scott’s alarm woke her early the next morning. She felt the bed shift, her first indication that he had actually come home at some point last night.

“You plan to be useless and sleep all day?” He muttered as he got dressed after his shower.

“I’m getting up.” Katherine grumbled, shifting to get out of bed. She never slept all day during the summer, always up by nine. Today she just wanted to avoid another arguments so she complied. Scott was gone for work by the time she got out of the shower. Katherine looked around the living room, feeling out of place as she drank her first cup of coffee. By the second she was on the phone to her college roommate who she hadn’t actually seen in years.

“Kate, hi.” Amanda said as she answered.

“You know how you’re always saying I should come visit?” Katherine asked.

“You finally convinced your husband to take a vacation.” Amanda teased.

“Not exactly, but I was hoping that I might be able to crash on your couch for a few weeks while I figure some things out.” Katherine sighed.

“Are you leaving Scott?” Amanda questioned, her tone more serious now.

“Honestly, I don’t know what I’m doing, just that I need to get away.” Katherine sighed.

“You’re welcome for as long as you need.” Amanda said.

“Thanks. I’ve got a few things to finalize but I’ll let you know when I book a flight.” Katherine replied.

 

She quickly got dressed and left to buy a few boxes. All the furniture in the house belong to Scott. Katherine taught elementary, he was the one with the well paying job, and she had basically moved in to his already furnished home. This had allowed her to save as he really didn’t ask her to contribute towards most of the household expenses. She spent the morning packing up the books, movies, and other items she didn’t want to leave behind, tossing all her clothes into garbage bags and her suitcase. It took her the better part of the afternoon to get the boxes and bags of clothes moved to her parents house. At four she did one last scan of the house, making sure she had taken everything she would miss if she didn’t return. After grabbing a small grocery bag to put her toiletries in she wrote a note to Scott, leaving it on the kitchen counter where she knew he would find it. She took one last look at the place she had lived for the last four years and left, driving across town to her parents house.

 

Katherine honestly didn’t know if she wanted a divorce, despite her drastic actions, all she knew was that she needed some space. That she needed to clear her head without worrying about what she had left behind. And most importantly, she needed time without Scott in her head, convincing her she was overreacting as usual. When she got to her parents house, she explained things as best she could. They had always liked Scott, and why wouldn’t they... he was always so nice and pleasant in front of them and she had never let on to anyone that things weren’t always so great. Talking to her parents made Katherine felt like a failure, like this was somehow her fault... maybe Scott was right and this was all in her head... maybe things weren’t so bad... but then why was she so miserable. Of course they had never seen Scott the way he was when it was just the two of them. No one had. He could act like a completely different person if he wanted to. Her mother thought he was perfect and told her as much. “You’re never going to find someone better if that’s what you’re thinking...” The last words her mother spoke before she couldn’t take anymore and excused herself to her old bedroom that had been converted to a guest room years ago. Katherine booked a flight for the following day and packed before she went to bed, ignoring the multiple calls from Scott.

 

Amanda had picked her up at the airport, quickly putting her suitcase in the trunk before apologizing that she’d have to hang out at the station for a while. Her boss had just called with a break in the case they were working and needed her back.

“I have no agenda and observing you at work could be interesting... if not, I have a book.” Katherine smiled.

“So... you’re leaving Scott?” Amanda asked as she drove.

“Thinking about it.” Katherine shrugged.

“I thought you two were like the perfect couple.” Amanda said.

“You moved from Atlanta two years into our relationship... everything was great then.” Katherine sighed.

“Still we talk, you never mentioned anything.” Amanda pushed.

“I know... I was embarrassed and not entirely sure there was anything to mention...” Katherine stated, turning to look out the window.

“It certainly seems like there was something worth mentioning.” Amanda mumbled.

“Can we talk about it later, when we’re not heading to your work where I assume other people work. I’d really prefer to not look like I’ve been crying.” Katherine sighed.

“Ok.” Amanda conceded.

 

“Good, Amanda you’re back.” A brunette lady said as the two women entered the bullpen.

“You can hangout here.” Amanda said gesturing to the chair next to her desk.

Katherine watched as Amanda joined a small group next to a white board. The group consisted of the lady that had spoke to Amanda when they entered, two men she assumed were around her and Amanda’s age, and an older man. She tried to follow their conversation but found it difficult from across the room and she soon gave up, pulling her book out. Her phone rang, maybe five minutes into reading, glancing at it she noticed it was Scott. Katherine took a deep breath and moved to the hallway to answer.

“Hi Scott.” She sighed.

“You just left?” He snapped.

“I need some time to think.” Katherine replied.

“You took your things. You took everything. You don’t plan on coming back.” Scott said accusingly.

“I need some time separate from you and us to figure things out. I need to be completely unattached while I do that.” Katherine stated.

“Well let me make things simple for you. You’re not welcome back.” Scott said hanging up on her.

Katherine leaned against the nearest wall, fighting back tears as she held her phone. She started to remove her ring, hesitating for a moment and then slid it back on her finger as she sighed. She wasn’t materialistic but she loved that ring, it was perfect... of course it was perfect, she had picked it out. Scott had never paid enough attention to pick something out for her. Instead he just took her to the jewelry store with him, they had been together for years at that point so it wasn’t exactly a surprise that he would ask her to marry him. She’d take the ring off later, giving herself one more day to wear it.

“Are you ok?” A voice said, interrupting her private moment.

“I’m fine,” she said, wiping the tears before they fell with both hands, “my marriage is over but I’m fine... I think it’s what I wanted anyway.” Katherine replied, taking in the man standing in front of her. The first thing she noticed was his extremely nice suit, or was it that he looked really good in the suit... Then his hair, his face, those intense green eyes that looked as though they we trying to figure her out.

“You think it’s want you wanted?” He asked, moving closer to her.

“Pretty sure.” she shrugged.

“His loss.” He smirked, causing her to blush. Katherine was both simultaneously self conscious of the extra weight she had put on and aware she carried it fairly well on her five foot seven frame. Her upper body looking almost as it had before the gain, while easily hiding the areas she hated, mostly her stomach and thighs, under flattering clothes.

“You don’t know that. I could be completely crazy.” Katherine smiled.

“I doubt that and I’m a pretty good judge of character.” He said, now standing directly in front of her. Katherine acted impulsively. Maybe it was the emotions that came with the ending of her marriage or perhaps the fluttery feeling in her stomach every time this man looked at her. Whatever the reason, she found her hands on the back of his neck and pulling him to her lips. He didn’t resist but instead reciprocated the brief embrace. It was the best kiss she had had in years, Scott not exactly being big on showing affection, she was lucky if she got a peck every once in a while and that was only if she initiated.

“Ok, maybe a little crazy.” He chuckled when they parted.

“Sorry.” Katherine apologized, almost immediately looking down.

“Don’t be. There are worse things than being randomly kissed by a beautiful woman.” He said, smiling when she looked up at him.

“I should get back to Amanda.” She sighed, gently biting her bottom lip.

“Amanda?” He questioned.

“My friend, she works here.” Katherine replied, noticing him close his eyes as he bit back a chuckle.

“What do you find funny?” She asked, walking next to him as they both headed toward the bullpen.

“Nothing,” he smirked, “I’m Rafael by the way.”

“Kate.” She smiled.

“It’s always good to know the name of someone whose tongue’s been in your mouth.” Rafael said, laughing when she teasingly smacked his arm.

“I really needed it.” She sighed.

“My tongue?” He asked, lifting his eyebrow at her.

“No,” Katherine said rolling her eyes, “the kiss... it was a really nice kiss.”

“I’d ask you out but I don’t think you’re quite ready for that.” Rafael said, stopping them both just before they entered the bullpen.

“It’d be pointless anyway. I’m heading back to Atlanta in a few weeks.” Katherine stated, pushing her bottom lip up slightly as she looked at him before heading back to Amanda’s desk.

“Barba, finally.” The brunette lady that had greeted Amanda said as Rafael entered the bullpen behind Katherine.

“Sorry, I got pulled aside for something.” Rafael apologized, quickly making his way to join the group by the white board. Katherine watched for moment before picking her book back up.

 

“So what exactly happened?” Amanda asked once they were settled in her apartment for the evening.

“I’ve been miserable for years and we’ve started fighting more frequently. I just kind of got to the point where I didn’t even feel like I even fit in my own home. Like I just lived in his house. I don’t even feel like we compromise anymore, typically I just give in to whatever he wants to avoid an argument.” Katherine sighed.

“He doesn’t force you to do anything?” Amanda questioned.

“What? No.” Katherine said, furrowing her brow.

“Sorry side effect of the job.” Amanda said, shrugging her shoulders.

“I couldn’t even tell you the last time we had sex or kissed for that matter...” Katherine sighed, rolling her eyes.

“Like months?” Amanda asked curiously.

“Possibly a year... It’s like we’re two people who barely get along but live together.” Katherine scoffed.

“You haven’t been laid in over a year?” Amanda half blurted the question, knowing her friend would never go outside her marriage.

“Something like that. I mean he’s made me so self conscious of the weight I’ve put on that I don’t want to initiate anything and I assume the weights why he doesn’t.” Katherine shrugged.

“What weight gain?” Amanda asked.

“The twenty pounds that have made their way onto my hips, thighs, and stomach.” Katherine replied.

“You’re crazy. You look almost exactly like you did in college.” Amanda scoffed.

“Not according to Scott.” Katherine muttered.

“Do you miss sex with him? Maybe you need a bout of hot angry make-up sex to reset some things.” Amanda suggested.

“Eh... I can have more fun in the shower. He at least tried when we were dating but it still was only average. After we got married it became pretty one sided, him grunting to completion in less than five minutes with me wondering why I even bothered. I’ve all but forgotten what it’s like to orgasm at someone else’s hand.” Katherine replied, rolling her eyes.

“You had lots of guys interested in college, why’d did you marry someone that was only ok in bed?” Amanda questioned.

“I loved him and he wasn’t bad, just average. If you’ll recall most of the really good ones didn’t want to date... or at least didn’t want to date me.” Katherine shrugged.

“You don’t love him anymore?” Amanda asked.

“I don’t even know who he is anymore.” Katherine sighed.

 

Amanda went to answer the door when the pizza delivery guy knocked.

“So what are your plans now?” Amanda asked as she sat the pizza down and rejoined Katherine at her small table.

“I’ll spend some time with you and then go back to my parents in Atlanta until I figure out a place to live. I have a decent amount of money in savings since Scott paid most of the bills. My salary went to my car payment, phone, and things I needed... mostly for my classroom.” Katherine said, taking a slice of pizza.

“I’m kind of surprised you don’t have a joint account.” Amanda stated before taking a bite.

“It was an ongoing argument but one I never gave into.” Katherine grumbled.

“Do you want to stay in Atlanta?” Amanda questioned.

“It’s where my job is.” Katherine sighed.

“You’re a public school teacher. I’m sure you could find a job almost anywhere, especially this close to the beginning of summer.” Amanda smiled.

“You think I should move to New York.” Katherine chuckled.

“Why not? There’s an railroad style apartment available in my building a few floors up and I can put in a good word for you with the landlord. You could interview for jobs while you’re here.” Amanda suggested.

“A drastic change could be good... How well do you know Rafael?” Katherine asked, not so subtly bringing him up, especially since Amanda really didn’t get an opportunity to introduce her to anyone.

“Rafael?” Amanda asked, lifting an eyebrow, “you mean Barba?”

“I guess. What do you know about him?” Katherine asked.

“How do you know his first name?” Amanda countered.

“We chatted for a bit in the hall, since he overheard my call with Scott. He told me his name was Rafael, he seemed nice.” Katherine explained, purposefully leaving out the small detail of the kiss.

“Barba seemed nice?” Amanda laughed.

“It was right after Scott told me not to come back.” Katherine sighed.

“I guess even Barba has his moments.” Amanda chuckled.

“Sooo... What do you know about him?” Katherine asked again.

“Why are you so curious?” Amanda questioned.

“Why wont you answer?” Katherine countered.

“It’s Barba... I don’t know much about him. I mean he’s smart, one of the best ADA’s we’ve had, and can be an ass at times, but I know nothing about his personal life.” Amanda shrugged.

“Oh, ok.” Katherine sighed.

“Seriously, why are you so interested?” Amanda asked.

“It was just the first time I felt something for someone in a while.” Katherine replied.

“No... Nope.” Amanda said, shaking her head.

“What?” Katherine questioned.

“You are not rebounding with Barba.” Amanda stated.

“I wasn’t planning on rebounding with him. I know I’m in no state to be with anyone else.” Katherine said.

“That’s not the Katherine I knew from college.” Amanda countered, lifting her brow.

“That Katherine has grown up... it has been ten years. Besides we haven’t even filed for divorce yet. I really was just curious about the man that made me not think about Scott and my failed marriage... that’s all.” Katherine grumbled.

“Google him if you’re so curious.” Amanda smirked.

 

The next day Katherine spent the better part of the morning looking at local school’s job openings. When she found one for a fourth grade math and science position that was within walking distance to Amanda’s building she decided to apply. Katherine quickly updated her resume before completing the online application. As soon as she hit submit she called her current principal.

“Hey Katherine.” Vicki greeted when she answered.

“Vicki, hi. I have a some news.” Katherine said.

“Ok...” Vicki replied.

“Scott and I are getting a divorce and I’m in New York visiting a friend. I’m thinking about a drastic change so I applied for a position here. I don’t know if I’ll get it but I wanted to give you a heads up in case they call for a reference.” Katherine blurted, trying to get it out as quickly as possible to the woman who was not only her boss but had become a good friend over the years.

“Are you resigning?” Vicki asked.

“That’s where I’m hoping you could work with me. I know it’s a lot to ask but I was hoping to not have to resign unless I actually found a job. If I don’t find one within the three weeks I’m here I have no intention of leaving the school that feels like family to me. I just feel like I need to try this.” Katherine said.

“You know I’ll give you a glowing reference, you’re one of my best teachers. I’d hate to lose you but I kind of get it. I need to know for certain by the end of three weeks though.” Vicki replied.

“You will.” Katherine assured her.

“When you get back, can we meet for lunch, catch up, talk about you and Scott?” Vicki suggested, but this time as her friend, not her boss.

“I’d like that.” Katherine smiled.

After she got off the phone, she emailed the principal of the school she had applied to and then left Amanda’s apartment to find something for lunch. She had barely sat down to eat when her phone rang with a number she didn’t recognize.

“This is Katherine...Tomorrow at one should work fine... Ok, yes. I look forward to meeting you too.” Katherine smiled. That was the fastest call back for a job she’d ever had. She didn’t know whether to worry that the school was desperate or be excited that things were falling into place. Deciding to go with the latter until she saw the school and smiled to herself as she ate her sandwich.


	2. Chapter 2

 

The school had been perfect. The move had been easy. The divorce was final. Katherine was pretty content with how things were working out. She had been living in New York for close to a year, having leased the railroad apartment in Amanda’s building. It was tiny but she loved it. The length of the apartment ran along an exterior wall allowing for more windows than she had expected. Her view was of the adjacent building, but still, it allowed for a certain amount of sunlight. The front door opened to her living room and to the left was a small kitchen with a door leading to an extremely tiny restroom just beyond that. The living and kitchen space had been painted white so the space seemed a bit roomier than it actually was. She had a small sage green table with two chairs in front of the window by the kitchen, a light gray couch and wood grain coffee table just beyond that. A media console that matched the coffee table and small television on the wall opposite the couch. There was a built in shelving system that lined the entire wall, with the exception of where the door was, between the living room and her bedroom. The built ins were tastefully done and meant Katherine didn’t have to buy a bookshelf. Her bedroom was also white, though one wall was left exposed brick. She ended up with a queen size bed, which was more than enough for just her and allowed room on each side to place nightstands with drawers that she used in place of a dresser she didn’t have room for considering the closet lined one wall, windows another, and there wasn’t room to put anything along the wall across from her bed, at least not if she wanted to walk around it. After throwing in a bit of lavender and green to make the place a little less stark, and getting her furniture just how she wanted, the apartment felt like home.

 

The elementary school she had taken the position at was completely different from her old school but she had found the same kind hearted people working within it. She loved her kids, but she knew she would. It seemed like every year she taught, she taught her favorite group of kids yet, always remembering that first year when she feared she’d never like a group of kids as much as them. It wasn’t long before she realized that each years group had their own unique personalities. It was always as the school year was winding down that she realized how much she was going to miss even her most challenging students. Sure most would be back the next year but it was always the kid that she didn’t expect to leave that she didn’t see in the halls a fifth grader.

 

“I brought liquor.” Amanda smiled as Katherine let her into her apartment. This had become a Friday night ritual between them. If Amanda wasn’t working late, she and Katherine would either meet up at a bar or have a few drinks at one or the others apartments. Apparently tonight would be at Katherines.

“You’ve been busy the last few weeks.” Katherine chuckled as she closed the door behind Amanda. “

It’s this case. I think Barba finally has something he can use but not without a lot of effort on our part.” Amanda sighed.

“Good... I think.” Katherine smiled.

“We work in different worlds,” Amanda said dismissively, “What’s new with you. Have you started seeing someone yet?”

“In the last three weeks, no.” Katherine chuckled.

“Ok, I’m beginning to worry about you. You at least need to get laid. It’s been what two years now since you’ve had sex?” Amanda asked.

“Something like that. I didn’t write down the exact date.” Katherine replied.

“I don’t see how you could go that long.” Amanda sighed.

“I’ve needed to just be me for a while. It’s been good.” Katherine smiled.

“I will say, you look fantastic.”

“I know. I didn’t even notice the weight come off until I had to buy new clothes. It’s amazing how just being happy can change how you eat. Of course all the walking doesn’t hurt.” Katherine chuckled.

“How long are you going to ‘just be you’ for?” Amanda teased.

“I don’t know. I’m not opposed to meeting someone now, I’m just not necessarily looking either.” Katherine said.

“He really did a number on you, huh?”

“Who, Scott?” Katherine asked, her mind briefly going to Rafael since she’d occasionally ask about him. She had never mentioned the kiss to Amanda, despite the fact that she thought about it from time to time.

“Who else?” Amanda questioned.

“I’m starting to feel like my old self again, but I still find myself second guessing my decisions, worrying that I’m going to do something differently than he would, a small twinge of fear that I’ll be told why my way is wrong or stupid. I know it’s irrational, I don’t even talk to him anymore but the thought still crosses my mind.” Katherine sighed, hating the fact that he still had lingering effect on her mood nearly a year later.

“When does school end?” Amanda asked, changing the subject.

“Wednesday.” Katherine smiled.

 

The last day of school had been a half day with the students and the principal had scheduled the last professional development meeting for the Tuesday before so teachers could leave once they were finished with their end of the year checklist. Katherine had her grades submitted and was almost finished packing up her room for cleaning over the summer when Amanda texted.

“We got a guilty verdict. Going to celebrate. If you get done soon you should join.”

“I should be done in thirty minutes.” Katherine replied.

She almost immediately got a text with the name and location of the bar they were at.

After giving her room another once over, she gathered the bags containing the things she wanted to work on over the summer and headed to her apartment to drop them off. Rafael popped into her head for a moment causing her to take a quick look in the mirror to make sure she looked decent... just in case. Katherine sighed at the reflection that greeted her, not realizing how disheveled she looked after packing up her room. She quickly brushed through her shoulder length brown hair and touched up her make-up before changing out or her dress shirt and slacks, opting instead for a figure flattering dark blue dress, her favorite shade of blue to wear because it made her eyes take on almost the same shade. This time when she looked in the mirror she smiled.

 

“Kate!” Amanda called, motioning her from the far side of the bar.

“Hi.” Katherine smiled, joining the group that was sitting at a round table.

“You look nice.” Amanda smirked, assuming she had changed in hopes of seeing Rafael. Katherine hadn’t brought him up too many times, only a few, but enough for Amanda to know she had hoped he might be getting drinks with them.

“Shut up.” Katherine huffed, causing Amanda to chuckled.

“You going to introduce us?” Carisi asked. He was sitting two chairs over from Katherine, the seat between them empty.

“This is Kate, Kate this is Nick, Liv, Fin, and Carisi.” Amanda said, pointing to the people she named as she worked her way around the table. Katherine nodded towards the others, a little disappointed not to see the man whose kiss she still thought about sitting at the table.

“What do you do?” Nick asked.

“I teach fourth grade.” Katherine replied.

“You must be excited that summers getting close.” Carisi smiled.

“Starts tomorrow actually.” Katherine grinned.

“Sorry I’m late.” Barba huffed, sitting in the empty chair next to Katherine.

“This is Rollins friend Kate. Kate this is Barba our ADA.” Carisi said taking it upon himself to introduce them. Katherine’s stomach almost immediately fluttered when his eyes met hers.

“You and I seem to be the only ones without drinks.” Rafael smiled.

“I guess we should fix that.” Katherine replied, joining him as he stood to go to the bar.

“Are you just visiting from Atlanta?” He asked once they were out of ear shot of the table.

“No I ended up moving here last summer.” She smiled.

“Married?” He questioned with a slight smile.

“No, you?” She smirked.

“No.” He chuckled.

“What can I get you?” The bartender asked, interrupting the staring contest they seemed to be having.

“Dirty vodka martini.” Katherine said when Rafael gestured for her to order first.

“Macallan neat.” He ordered when the bartender turned to him.

“I still think about that kiss sometimes.” Rafael said once the bartender left to make their drinks.

“Me too.” Katherine smiled, turning to look at him again.

“Can I get your number?” He asked, pulling his phone out of his pocket. Katherine smiled and rattled it off to him, watching as he entered it into his phone.

“Morgan.” She said, answering his unasked question when he looked at her as he got to the last name space in the contact he was creating.

She stopped watching when the bartender placed the drinks in front of them.

“On your tab Mr. Barba?” He asked.

“Yes, hers as well.” Rafael said, finishing up with his phone and placing it back in his pocket.

“I texted you my number.” He smiled, turning his attention back to Katherine as he picked up his drink. Her eyes widened slightly knowing her phone was sitting face up on the table in Amanda’s line of sight.

“What?” He questioned, confused by her reaction, afraid he had misread something.

“Amanda.” Katherine chuckled, nodding towards the table where Amanda was looking over her shoulder at them, a less than pleased look on her face. He had only sent his name in the message, so she would know it was him, but it was enough for Amanda to make an assumption.

“I would have waited if I had known your phone was on the table.” Rafael smiled.

“Eh, she’s already poked fun at me for changing between work and here, knowing I only did because I thought I might see you.” She shrugged as they made their way back to the table.

“What are your plans for your summer vacation?” Carisi asked when they sat back down.

“Tomorrow I plan to sleep. No alarm, just get up when my body decides to wake up naturally.” Katherine smiled before continuing, “Truthfully though, I’ve got lesson plans to rework, professional development in two weeks, a seminar I stupidly volunteered to lead in July that I need to prepare for, and I want to actually see some of New York this summer since I didn’t really get the opportunity to when I moved here last summer.”

“You’re a teacher?” Rafael asked.

“Fourth grade, math and science.” She smiled.

“I can’t see Rollins being close friends with an elementary school teacher.” Fin teased.

“If you had known her in college you wouldn’t have thought she’d eventually teach elementary.” Amanda chuckled.

“That’s funny, seeing as I took my state certification test before I graduated.” Katherine said, rolling her eyes. The conversation continued, moving off Katherine and more toward the case they had just worked.

Amanda noticed when Rafael moved his chair slightly closer to Katherine, the little smiles they were happily exchanging, the subtle touches, that she seemed to get a new drink when he went to get one for himself... “We need to go to the bathroom.” Amanda announced, half pulling Katherine behind her after Rafael had leaned back in his chair and casually rested his hand on the back of Katherine’s chair. It hadn’t appeared to be anything to anyone else at the table, just him making himself comfortable. It wasn’t even intimate really, his hand was barely resting on the wood, not even touching her.

“Since when do we go to the bathroom together?” Katherine asked, once they were inside.

“What are you doing?” Amanda snapped.

“What?” Katherine questioned, playing dumb. She knew exactly what Amanda was referencing.

“With Barba?” Amanda huffed.

“I like him.” Katherine replied.

“You don’t know him. I specifically told you not to rebound with him.” Amanda barked.

“It’s been a year, I’m not rebounding. I find him attractive and smart and funny... and for the first time in a long time I actually feel those stupid little butterflies in my stomach. Aren’t you the one who keeps telling me I need to get back out there?” Katherine countered.

“I didn’t mean with Barba...” Amanda huffed.

“Then why did you invite me out knowing he’d be here? Knowing I keep asking about him?” Katherine questioned.

“I guess I thought maybe you’d meet again and feel different...” Amanda sighed.

“If it really bothers you I’ll back off.” Katherine said glumly, she wasn’t going to intentionally do something she knew Amanda was against.

“You really like him? You’re not just looking to get laid? I mean I still have to work with him if this doesn’t work out.” Amanda questioned.

“I really like him.” Katherine sighed.

“Fine.” Amanda huffed.

“Fine what?” Katherine asked, needing clarification as to what Amanda was agreeing to.

“Fine, you can see if there’s something there.” Amanda sighed.

“Really?” Katherine squeaked, hugging her.

“Yes, but I swear if this ends badly and he makes my life harder I will find a way to make you miserable.” Amanda smirked.

“Everything ok?” Rafael whispered when they sat back down.

“Yes.” Katherine smiled. He smiled at Amanda, who rolled her eyes, before resuming his position from before they had gotten up. Amanda was slightly amused that no one else seemed to notice the body language being exchanged between Rafael and Katherine but truthfully no one else had been looking for it either.

“What brought you to New York?” Liv asked Katherine after a lag in the conversation.

“I just needed a change. Turned out to be one of the best decisions I’ve made.” Katherine said.

“It’s only been a year.” Amanda smirked.

“It’s been a good year.” Katherine smiled.

“Did your boyfriend move with you?” Carisi asked.

“No.” Katherine replied, chuckling when Amanda rolled her eyes again.

“Why New York? Was it just because Amanda was here?” Nick asked.

“I mean a little. She suggested it when I came to visit last summer. I guess that’s why it ended up being New York, but I never intended to live in Atlanta for the rest of my life anyway.” Katherine said.

“What kept you in Atlanta then?” Carisi asked.

“What is this, twenty questions?” Rafael interjected with an eye roll.

“I’m just tying to get to know Rollins friend a little.” Carisi shrugged.

“And on that note, I think I’m going to head home.” Liv chuckled.

“I’m out too. Let the young ones drink until they regret it the next day. I’m getting too old for that.” Fin smiled, standing to leave when Liv did.

“It was nice to meet you.” Katherine said.

“You two.” They both replied, making their way to the bar to pay their tabs.

 

Rafael, Nick, and Carisi were having a rather heated discussion on the best place to get Italian food when Amanda handed a condom she had retrieved from her purse to Katherine.

“What is this for?” Katherine asked, almost immediately hiding it under her hand in her lap.

“What do you think it’s for?” Amanda smirked, gesturing with her eyes toward Rafael.

“I’m not going to need this tonight.” Katherine stated, trying to hand it back to her.

“Do you have any at home?” Amanda questioned.

“No. I haven’t exactly needed them.” Katherine replied.

“I know...” Amanda chuckled.

“Just because it’s been two years doesn’t mean I’m going to immediately sleep with someone. If anything it’s made me more patient.” Katherine argued.

“Let’s just say he walks you home. You invite him in for a drink... You kiss, maybe start making out on the couch... What happens next? Can you absolutely guarantee that it will stop there or would you like to be prepared?” Amanda countered.

“I kind of hate you.” Katherine sighed.

“No you don’t.” Amanda smiled, watching her lean down to put the condom in her purse.

“I’m Italian. I think I know the best place to eat Italian.” Carisi snapped, finally ending the rather ridiculous discussion the three men were having.

 

“I think I’m out.” Nick said, gently nudging Amanda’s leg as he stood to leave.

“Me too.” Amanda yawned. Katherine had noticed the nudge and would have picked on her if she hadn’t gotten the distinct impression this was something they didn’t exactly want shared with their coworkers. That wouldn’t stop her the next time she was hanging out with just Amanda though.

“You good to get home?” Amanda asked Katherine before leaving to join Nick at the bar to pay out.

“I can make sure she gets home safely.” Rafael smiled.

“Ok.” Amanda said, refraining from rolling her eyes until her back was to them.

“And then there were three.” Carisi said, completely oblivious to the little looks Rafael and Katherine had exchanged all night.

“What time do you guys have to be at work tomorrow?” Katherine asked. She was tired because her day had started at five but had no problem staying out since she could get up whenever she wanted the next day. Her question was more to gauge how long to wait to suggest leaving so as not to be rude to Carisi but possibly give her some time to talk with Rafael alone.

“I’ve got to be in at nine. Lot’s of paperwork after a case like this, am I right counselor?” Carisi smiled.

“Yes, lots of paperwork. In fact I should probably head out myself soon, if that’s ok with Kate. I did promise Rollins I’d make sure you got home ok.” Rafael said, turning to face her.

“I can walk you home if you want to stay.” Carisi offered.

“I appreciate the offer but I’ve been up since five so I should probably be getting home soon anyway.” She smiled.

“Oh, ok. I guess I’m leaving too then.” Carisi said.

“I’m going to hit up the restroom before we leave.” Katherine said as they stood to head to the bar.

“I’ll wait here.” Rafael smiled, sitting back down.

“It was nice meeting you, Kate.” Carisi said.

“You too.” She smiled, making her way to the bathroom.

“Am I missing something?” Carisi asked Rafael.

“Like what?” Rafael questioned, looking up at him from his seat like he was crazy.

“I guess not. Night Barba.” Carisi said, making his way to the bar.

“Was that too obvious?” Katherine asked as she watched Rafael pay the tab he refused to let her help with.

“I’m pretty sure Carisi is still oblivious.” Rafael chuckled.

“So you’re walking me home?” She smiled, walking next to him as they left.

“Unless you have a problem with that.” He smirked.

“I don’t.” She replied, her voice cracking.

There was a moment of silence as they walked down the busy side walk. Katherine suddenly feeling awkward and out of practice as she blanked on anything to say to the man walking next to her, almost wishing Carisi were still there asking questions...

“My mom was a teacher, she’s a principal now but when I was a kid she taught second grade.” Rafael said, forcing himself to not ask about her divorce.

“Did she teach you?” Katherine smirked.

“No. They sent me to catholic school, she runs a charter.” He said.

“I was so anxious to change schools. That was the one thing about this whole move that I was upset about. Your school becomes a second family, you know. I hated leaving them...” She sighed.

“I know. My abuelita used to pick me up from my school and take me to my moms. I knew the teacher’s kids at her school almost as well as I knew the kids at my own.” Rafael chuckled, taking her hand in his.

They continued the light banter about school until they reached her door.

“This is me.” Katherine smiled.

“Is it?” He smirked, moving closer to her. Katherine’s heart beat faster as the space between them diminished. Rafael placed his hand on the back of her neck as he pulled her towards him, pressing his lips to hers. The kiss lasted longer than the one they had shared the year prior. A small moan escaping her when he pressed her against the door.

“Do you want to come in for a drink?” She panted, looking up at him when their lips parted.

“I think I’ve had enough to drink.” Rafael smiled, pushing her hair behind her ear.

“The drink is just pretext.” Katherine smirked.

“As long as it’s just pretext.” He said, the corners of his lips twitching up as he leaned in to kiss her again. Katherine fumbled to get her keys out of her purse, only pulling away from his lips long enough to unlock the door. His arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer to him as soon as they were inside.

Rafael wasn’t exactly paying attention to the layout of her apartment but considering its size, with a bedroom the only door off the main living space, her bed wasn’t terribly hard to locate. Katherine set her purse on her nightstand, when he tugged at it, her hands moving to push the suit jacket off his shoulders. Her stomach fluttered when he stepped back from her, their eyes connecting while he removed his tie. She almost panicked, she might have panicked if he hadn’t placed his arms around her again, gently pulling her towards him as he resumed their kiss. Should she be jumping into sleeping with him? Wouldn’t it be better to wait, maybe actually go on a date... Talk about more than just her job? All these thoughts went through her head as her hands worked to undress him, the buttons to his shirt undone, dress slacks unfastened... her fingers running up his chest under his shirt, pushing both it and the suspenders off his shoulders. At this point, even if he turned out to only be a one night thing she didn’t care... just like the kiss last year, she couldn’t help herself... The shirt fell to the ground, his pants pooled at his feet...

Katherine watched as he stepped out of both his pants and his shoes before advancing on her again, his hands finding the zipper to her dress. The dress fell and his hands touched her bare sides, fingertips lightly making their way upward, unclasping her bra, and gently grazing the bottom of her breast as she slid the bra down her arms. Katherine reached her arm around his neck to steady herself as he walked her backwards towards her bed. She hadn’t done this in years and it been close to a decade since she had done it with anyone other than Scott. Rafael kissed down her neck, her chest, eliciting a soft moan from her as he tongued her nipple. She pulled his undershirt off as he continued kissing down her stomach, his fingers hooking the waistband of her underwear as he removed them. Katherine gasped when made contact, his tongue stroking against her clit. This was something her ex husband never did, maybe once or twice when they first started dated but never after that. In total they had been together for seven years, at one point she just kind of assumed would never happen again.

“My god...” She panted, her hand gripping his hair as her back arched. “Raf...” Katherine moaned, her head tilting back, her body tensing and then bucking against him.

She panted as he kissed his way back up her body, a small smirk on his face as he pressed his lips to hers again. She ran her hands through his hair as his body pressed against hers, the boxer briefs having been removed though she wasn’t quite sure when.

“Wait.” Katherine panted when she felt him teasing her opening.

“What’s wrong?” Rafael questioned, looking at her as he pulled back slightly.

“I’m just grabbing a condom.” She smiled, kissing him before stretching her arm out to pull the one out of her purse Amanda had forced her to take, both thankful and annoyed that she had been right.

“You keep them in your purse?” He smirked when she handed it to him.

“Not exactly.” She chuckled.

“Do I want to know?” Rafael asked rolling the condom on.

“Probably not.” Katherine giggled as he settle back on top of her. She nestled her hands back in his hair when his lips found hers again, his tip pressing into her.

“Fuck.” Katherine gasped when he thrust a little deeper.

“Are you ok?” Rafael asked, pausing to look at her. He knew with as tight as she felt around him that she couldn’t be terribly comfortable.

“It’s just been a while... I’ll adjust.” She panted, pulling him back to her lips. He slowly eased himself the rest of the way inside her, pausing to allow her time to adjust to him before he began moving.

“Jesus...” He groaned at how tightly she pressed around him as he thrust. Katherine moaned as he kept a slow steady pace, building with intensity as he alternated between kissing and looking at her, his hands pressed firmly against her neck and cheek.

“Fuck...” She panted as her toes curled, her fingers gripped tightly into his hair. This was new. Rafael watched her as she arched beneath him, her chest rising and falling with each breath she took trying to maintain some control of her body as it buckled. He listened to her moans only slowing when he was sure she had finished. She smiled when he kissed her again, despite feeling a void, like something was missing when he pulled out. Rafael shifted, curling up behind her as they spooned, his shaft pressing against her back, her first indication that he wasn’t finished yet. When she looked over her shoulder to ask him why he had stopped, his lips greeted hers. He lightly ran his hands across her chest and stomach, one tweaking a nipple while the other reached between her legs. Gently he pushed himself into her again, pumping as his fingers tormented other areas that were much too sensitive now. It wasn’t long before he had her moaning again, her head arched back against his shoulders, his left arm holding her in place as his right continued to tease her clit.

“Fuck...” Katherine groaned again as her third orgasm moved through her, causing her to pull away from him slightly. Rafael gripped her hips, continuing to thrust toward his own completion, tensing with his last push into her and wrapping his arms tightly around her, panting in her ear.

“Wow...” Katherine panted, turning to look at him as they caught their breath.

“I take it you enjoyed yourself.” Rafael smirked, his chest rising and falling rapidly. Katherine turned to rest her head on the pillow, suddenly self conscious, worrying that perhaps this would be just a one time thing since she rushed it.

“Where’s the restroom?” Rafael asked, interrupting her thoughts.

“The door just passed the kitchen.” She replied, feeling empty again when he slid out of her before climbing out of the bed. She should have waited... kissed him goodnight at the door and let him call her, gone on a date... maybe a few dates then did this. He’d be out the door as soon as he was through in the restroom and she’d be a wreck waiting for a call that would never come. It had always been a fault that she moved too quickly... She liked sex though and my god had she forgotten how good it could be. Katherine watched as Rafael made his way to his pants as he returned from the bathroom and assumed he would get dressed when he picked them up. Instead he retrieved his phone from the pocket and climbed back in bed with her.

“I know you said you planned to sleep until you woke up naturally but is it ok if I set an alarm for nine? I can go in a little late but I do need to work tomorrow.” He said, wrapping her in his arms as he set the alarm on his phone.

“That’s fine.” She replied, cuddling closer to him.

“What are you doing Friday?” Rafael asked, reaching across her to set his phone on her nightstand.

“I usually meet up with Amanda for drinks.” Katherine said.

“Do you want to have dinner with me instead?” He asked.

“I’d like that.” She smiled.


	3. Chapter 3

 

Katherine woke, curled on her side as close to the edge of the bed as she could feasible get without falling off... something she hadn’t done since she shared a bed with Scott.

“Seriously...” She muttered to herself trying to figure out what made her squish over to the edge. Normally she woke up in the middle of the bed as though she were trying to take up as much of it as possible. When she turned over she saw Rafael sleeping peacefully on his back and the events of last night came back to her. She smiled when she remembered she had still been laying in his arms when she fell asleep, so she assumed she had moved to the edge out of habit... Scott had always complained that she was too hot and would then take over the bed, blaming her if he woke up because of the heat even though he was on her side.

Katherine glanced at the clock. It was only seven but still two hours later than she was used to getting up so she’d take it. It always took her a few weeks to shake her work schedule. She quietly climbed out of bed, slipping on the gray fitted shirt and navy shorts she had slept in the night before, and exited her room closing the door behind her so she wouldn’t disturb him while she made coffee and brushed her teeth.

The volume was low as she watched the news and had barely finished her first cup when Rafael emerged dressed in yesterdays suit, minus the tie and jacket.

“The television didn’t wake you did it?” Katherine asked. He had set his alarm for nine but it was barely past seven thirty.

“The television’s not what woke me.” Rafael smirked, gesturing to the cup of coffee in her hand.

“There’s a full pot brewed in the kitchen.” She smiled, standing to get him a cup while refilling her own.

“What are your plans for today?” He asked wrapping his arms around her and kissing her neck making her giggle.

“I’m thinking about showering and then doing something touristy before it gets too busy with summer travelers.”

Katherine spun in his arms so she faced him, leaving both cups of coffee on the counter behind her, smiling when he picked his up.

“Do you want company?”

“I thought you had to work today?”

“I meant in the shower.” Rafael smirked, taking a sip of coffee.

“Did you not see how tiny it was last night?” She chuckled.

“I wasn’t really paying attention last night.” He replied, running his hand through her hair.

“It’s really tiny.”

Katherine reached out and opened the door leading to the restroom without really moving much from his arms and pointed to the shower that was barely big enough for her.

“Well that’s a little disappointing...”

“It works for just one person.” She chuckled.

“Next time you’ll have to stay at my place.” Rafael smiled, pulling her against him with the arm not holding the coffee and kissing her.

“Do you have time for breakfast? I have eggs and bacon, possibly some toast if my breads still good.” Katherine smiled.

“I wasn’t planning to get up until nine so I have time.”

“Great.” She said slipping out of his arms to grab the pans she needed from the cabinet behind her.

Rafael moved out of the small kitchen space and stood leaning against the tiny strip of counter by the stove, drinking his coffee as he watched her gather the things she needed.

“You’re very organized.” He chuckled.

“I have to be, the space doesn’t allow for clutter.” Katherine stated, pulling a step ladder from between the fridge and the wall so she could reach the upper cabinets where she kept her toaster.

“Most people just leave that on the counter.” Rafael teased, watching her climb down with it under her arm.

“I have about three square feet of counter space. I’m not taking some of it up with a toaster.”

“But the coffee maker gets a pass?”

“The coffee maker gets used everyday.” She smirked.

“I knew I liked something about you.” He chuckled.

“Do you prefer your eggs scrambled or fried? Katherine asked, smiling at his previous comment.

“Which ever is easier.”

“That’s a non answer, but considering I break the yolk half the time I’ll do scrambled.”

“Can I help?”

“By standing out of the way? Yes.” She smiled.

“Do you cook breakfast for all your overnight guest?” Rafael teased. He knew based on the night before that it had been a while since she slept next to someone... possibly since her ex husband but that he couldn’t know for sure.

Katherine paused briefly before getting the bacon started. The last time she cooked for someone was the night she ended up cowering in the study. Scott hadn’t complained about the food. Their fight had been about her sitting on the couch after they ate instead of immediately cleaning the kitchen... or at least that’s how it started.

_“Are you going to just leave the kitchen like that?” Scott grumbled as he flipped through the stations looking for something to watch. “No. I just want to sit for a bit, I’ll clean it in a minute.” Katherine replied, scrolling through work emails on her phone, deleting the non important ones, while adding her summer professional development dates to her calendar. “Don’t you sit all day...” He muttered, just loud enough that he knew she heard him. Katherine’s whole body tensed. She knew a fight was coming just from his demeanor and it really wouldn’t matter what she did. Still, in an effort to avoid the inevitable, she got up, resisted sighing out loud, and started cleaning the few remaining dishes. Over the years of living with Scott she had started, or he had trained her... she never really knew which... to clean as she cooked. While things baked in the oven or steamed on the stove she cleaned the cutting board, bowls, and anything else she had used to prepare the food with. This had left two baking sheets, the pot she had steamed the veggies in, and the plates they had eaten off left to clean. Once finished with the dishes, she sprayed and wiped down the counter. Scott joined her in the kitchen once she was done and started scanning the counter for a spot she missed. Katherine refrained from rolling her eyes, at least until his back was to her, and went back to her chair without saying anything. She knew he’d find something, make a big huff about it, and then clean the counter a second time. “Can you not even clean correctly?” She heard him grumble as he got the spray back out._

“I didn’t mean to insinuate...” Rafael said softly, pulling her from the memory.

“I know you were teasing.” Katherine smiled, moving on to the eggs.

“Still, it seemed to bother you.”

“Not what you said. The last time I cooked for someone popped into my head... it wasn’t exactly a pleasant memory.” She said, shrugging it off.

Rafael watched her tend to the bacon and eggs before turning to toast some bread, humming as she rinsed the bowl she had scrambled the eggs in and meticulously wipe any crumbs from the counter. She seemed to be back to the cheerful woman from moments before so he didn’t push for more information.

Katherine plated the food, handing both plates to him to take to her table by the window while she moved all the dishes to the sink.

“Do you always clean as you go?” Rafael smirked when she finally sat down.

“It’s habit now.” Katherine said dismissively.

“What touristy thing are you planning on doing today?” He asked changing the subject.

“The Statue of Liberty.” She grinned, “maybe Ellis Island as well.”

“Are you going to take pictures?” He smiled, noticing a camera sitting on one of the shelves.

“It wouldn’t be very touristy if I didn’t.” Katherine chuckled.

“I kind of wish I didn’t have to work today.”

Rafael’s eyes locked with hers, his fingers partially covering the smile that tugged at his lips.

“Have you been?”

Her voice cracked as she tried to ignore the lump in her throat, managing to maintain eye contact.

“When I was a kid on a field trip.”

“You grew up in New York?”

“In the Bronx.”

“Do you drive?” She asked, not being able to stop the slightly random question, “I mean did you learn to drive as a teen?” In the last year that she had lived in New York without a car, the thought kept popping into her head, wondering if sixteen years olds had the same learning to drive experience here as they did in cities with less efficient public transportation and better parking.

“What would be the point? You can get anywhere you want using public transportation.” Rafael shrugged.

“So you can’t drive or you don’t?” Katherine questioned looking entirely too excited to hear his answer.

“Eat your breakfast.” He smirked.

Katherine smiled and took a bite of her eggs, finding it much easier to maintain eye contact with him when he looked amused.

 

“You know you can wait until I leave to clean.” Rafael chuckled as she knocked the crumbs from the toaster over her sink before returning it to the cabinet and wiping down the counter.

“There’s not much to clean.” She smiled, pulling a towel from the cabinet below the sink and laying it flat on the counter she had just cleaned.

He watched as she scrubbed each dish with a fresh sponge and dish soap, laying them on the towel to dry, before wiping down the stove with a paper towel and cleaning spray.

“I can dry.” He offered, gesturing to the clean dishes.

“Sure.” Katherine smiled handing him a towel.

“Your apartment is very tidy.” He smirked, handing her the pan he had just finished drying so she could put it away.

“There is not enough room in this kitchen not to stay on top of the dishes.” She smiled.

“Yes, but it seems as though nothing is out of place in your apartment. I almost feel like I need to clean mine before I invite you over.” Rafael chuckled.

“Don’t feel like you need to clean. I would hate to have that effect on someone.” Katherine said, looking up at him, all trace of humor gone from her face.

Rafael furrowed his brow slightly. “Ok...”

“I just don’t want you to do something you wouldn’t normally do because of my neurosis.” She smiled.

“I almost hate to tell you how disheveled your bed looks.” He teased.

“You want to help me make it.” Katherine smirked.

He nodded and followed her to her bedroom. They pulled the lavender top sheet and then the sage green comforter up, neatly pressing the top and sides flat, before placing the two pillows in lavender pillow cases on top.

“Better?” He smiled, wrapping his arms around her waist.

“I could have waited to make the bed after you left, but you brought it up.”

“Yes and it got you back in the bedroom.” Rafael smirked, pressing his lips to hers and walking her backwards, both of them climbing on her neatly made bed, his body pressing against hers as his hands ran up the thin material of her shirt. Katherine softly moaned when his thumb grazed her nipple and his mouth moved to her neck.

“Raf...” She panted.

“Yes.” He breathed against her neck.

“I only had the one condom.”

Rafael paused and pulled himself up to look at her. “Ok.” He smiled, sliding his hand down her side and under the waistband of her shorts.

“Rafael...” Katherine scolded when she felt his fingers between her legs.

“We can do lots of things that don’t require a condom.” He whispered.

“You won’t be late for work?” She asked, her breathing already labored.

“All I really need is the afternoon.” He said, bringing his lips back to hers.

 

Katherine had stopped by the drugstore for condoms on her way home from her sightseeing adventure at The Statue of Liberty. Rafael had taken up most of her morning so she opted to see Ellis Island another day. She and Amanda both reached their building at the same time and Katherine was thankful her bag had been large enough to shove the drugstore bag in, hoping to avoid a few questions.

“Katherine.” Amanda smiled.

“Amanda.” Katherine smirked, walking passed her when Amanda held the door open for her.

“So...”

“So...” Katherine mimicked.

“Did Barba walk you home?” Amanda asked, both of them starting up the stairs.

“He did.”

Katherine stifled a chuckle when Amanda rolled her eyes.

“And?”

“And what?” Katherine shrugged.

“I have had do deal with Carisi’s unrelenting questions about you all day today which was extra annoying due to my slight hangover so you need to give me something.” Amanda grumbled.

“That Carisi guy asked about me?” Katherine asked, purposely avoiding the topic of Rafael.

“I told him you were seeing someone.”

“What about that Nick guy?”

This time Katherine had to fight hard not to laugh at the face Amanda made.

“What two guys I work with isn’t enough for you?” Amanda huffed.

“Is he a fling or are you two together?”

“What?”

“You and that Nick guy? I saw him nudge you before you left last night.” Katherine replied.

“Don’t change the subject.” Amanda said, continuing past her floor, following Katherine to her apartment.

“I’m seeing Rafael tomorrow night.”

“Did he just walk you home?” Amanda pried.

“He came in for a bit.” Katherine blushed.

“How was it?” Amanda smirked.

“You really want to know how the ADA you work with regularly is in bed?” Katherine asked as they entered her apartment.

“Yes.” Amanda replied, giving her a mischievous look and lifting her brows.

“You remember Justin?”

“That guy you went out with a few time but continued to sleep with because the sex was that good?” Amanda questioned, racking her brain as she tried to remember a Justin from when they were roommates.

“Yes.”

“What does he have to do with Barba?”

“It was better than that, except Rafael isn’t an arrogant ass like Justin was.” Katherine smiled.

“Are you sure?”

“It may have been a while since I’ve slept with someone but I still know when someone is good.” Katherine huffed.

“I meant about him not being an arrogant ass.” Amanda chuckled.

“He’s confident but considerate.” Katherine smiled.

“If you say so.” Amanda chuckled again, shaking her head slightly.

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok it stopped doing the weird double space thing and now I’m not sure I like it... or how to change it back. Ha! Oh well.

 

Rafael had picked her up straight from leaving work. Katherine knew he would still be in a suit, so she decided to put on a black dress that looked like she could have left the same office he had. She rarely dressed like this for her own work seeing as she was surrounded by nine and ten year olds for most of the day. During the school year she wore slacks and a variety of dress shirts and blouses, occasionally jeans if they were allowed to, and every once in a while she’d wear a dress... usually picture day, beginning of the year conferences with parents, or open house. During the summer she mostly wore jeans and sometimes a sun dress, though her current favorite part about not being married to Scott was the fact that if she stayed in and worked on lesson plans or watched Netflix... sometimes both, she could wear her pajama’s all day judgement free.  
“You look nice.” Rafael had smirked when he picked her up.  
“So do you.”  
This whole flirting thing was getting easier. The talking in general was getting easier, but that didn’t mean the butterflies were gone. She had changed three times and cleaned every surface of her apartment by the time he had arrived. The nervous cleaning was something she had mixed feelings about. She knew that it was a hold over from Scott’s constant nagging, but she also really liked how clean her apartment was.  
“Can I ask...” Rafael paused as he watched her take a sip of the martini she had ordered, “actually... never mind.”  
“About my divorce? May as well rip the bandaid off right?”  
“Yeah...” Rafael bit his lip to hide the smile he was fighting at her candor.  
“I wish I could say we just drifted apart, but that would only be partially true.” She sighed. “The truth is I was miserable, so miserable that I packed up my things and left. Which in hindsight feels kind of shitty, but I would have never left if I hadn’t.”  
“Why is that?”  
“Scott would have convinced me I was overreacting... he always made me feel like I was crazy or being irrational if I complained about something. There was no talking through issues to try to fix them... everything had to be his way or it was wrong.”  
“He sounds controlling.”  
Katherine snorted as she tried not to laugh. “Controlling is putting it mildly.”  
“So you just left?”  
“He woke me up one morning after a particularly bad fight the night before, and basically called me lazy and useless, asking if I was going to sleep all day. This was at six in the morning the first week of summer break mind you. I didn’t want to argue, so I got up. He was gone for work by the time I got out of the shower. I stood in the kitchen drinking cup after cup of coffee, just staring at a home that I no longer felt comfortable in.”  
“He sounds like a winner.” Rafael huffed, bringing his scotch to his lips.  
Katherine immediately felt the need to justify the relationship, feeling stupid for letting it get as bad as it had. “It didn’t start out that way. If anything he was overly attentive. I thought I was being so cautious... I had been in relationships that dwindled after years. Where you were just no longer interested in the same things and ended up going your separate ways. I had always said that I wouldn’t get married unless I had dated the person for at least three years, that being the length of my longest relationship prior to Scott. It was three and a half years before we got engaged, four before we were married. He had always been a bit stubborn... we both were, but he changed after we got married. That’s when he became unyielding, day by day chipping away at the person I used to be. Truthfully, there had been signs that I should have seen, but...”  
“Like what?”  
“I move in with him around year three. We didn’t find a place together, I just moved into his home and he liked things a certain way. I felt like a guest at first, so I wanted to make the transition smooth and changed myself to fit his needs... setting a precedent I guess.” She sighed.  
“Men like that know what they’re doing. They get in your head and make you feel guilty for just being yourself, instead of bending in anyway to accommodate who you are.”  
“Professional or personal experience?” Katherine asked. The way he had spoken made her feel it was the latter.  
“My father.”  
“And you couldn’t just leave...”  
“My mom could have, but it’s not as easy as that is it?” He smiled and Katherine exhaled a breath she hadn’t known she was holding.

The rest of dinner went smoothly, the conversation lighter. Rafael walked her to her door, smiling as he leaned down to kiss her.  
“It’s still early.” Katherine breathed.  
“Very early.” He smirked.  
“You’re coming in then?”  
Rafael nodded, pulling her back to his lips before letting her go just long enough to move inside her apartment.  
“We should have gone to my place.” Rafael breathed between kisses as they stripped each other on the way to her bedroom.  
“Why?”  
“I have condoms there.” He stated, pushing her back on her bed.  
“I bought some.” She smiled as he climbed on top of her.  
“Not borrowing one from Rollins this time.” He smirked, kissing his way down her neck and chest.  
“Technically, she forced it on me.” Katherine chuckled.  
“I don’t want a reason to like her.”  
“She is one of my best friends.” She lifted her brow as they made eye contact, his head between her thighs.  
“Yes, but can we maybe not talk about Rollins at this particular moment.”  
“You brought her up.” Katherine smirked and since he couldn’t exactly argue with her, he rolled his eyes and continued kissing toward her apex.  
Katherine gripped the sheets as his tongue circled and teased, his fingers filling her. Her back arched as she pulled away when her orgasm approached, but he held her tightly, continuing until he felt her body jerk and her hand pushing at his head.  
Rafael kissed slowly up he torso, giving her a moment.  
“Where are the condoms?” He breathed, kissing her before she could respond.  
“Third drawer.” She panted, waving at the nightstand.  
He found what he was looking for, not even bothering to put the box back in the drawer as he rolled it on and settled above her again. Gently he eased into her, groaning, but not commenting on how tight she still felt.  
He kept them missionary. Wanting to kiss her, to see her. There really was something about her he was completely drawn to and he couldn’t help but think her ex husband was a complete asshat.  
“Rafael...” She moaned as her chest pushed against his.  
He gripped her hair and thrust faster, his forehead pushed against her neck.  
“Fuck.” Katherine groaned, her body giving into the orgasm.  
Rafael grunted his own release, his weight pressing against her when he stilled.  
They laid there for a moment, just enjoying the feel of the other.  
“I’ll be right back.” He smiled, kissing her quickly and then making his way to the bathroom.

“You’re really good at that.” Katherine smiled as he crawled under the covers with her.  
“Better than...” He stopped himself before he finished the questioned he had started without thinking.  
Katherine chuckled. “There’s no comparison.”  
“Meaning?” Rafael quirked an eyebrow.  
“Meaning... you’re really good at that.” She smiled, pushing him on his back and kissing down his torso.  
“And you’re insatiable.” He smirked when her hand found him.  
“Just making up for lost time.”  
Katherine lowered her mouth on him, gently sucking until he was hard again. Rafael ran his hand through her hair as she bobbed, taking him a bit deeper each time.  
“Come here.” He half groaned, wanting to be inside her again. The last time they had only had the one condom. He had had to stop himself from teasing her about the quantity in box she had purchased, but truthfully it had been more of an economic choice to buy the bigger box.  
Katherine hovered above him, allowing him to guide her to sit so that he was completely sheathed inside her. His hands found her breast as she rode him, lightly sliding his fingers around to her back, he pulled her to lay on his chest, his hands moving to grip her ass.  
She moaned against his lips when he thrust to meet her movements while squeezing her ass and pushing her back down on him.  
“Fuck.” She groaned. Her fingers cupping his cheeks as she pushed up on her forearms to get better leverage.  
“Kate...” He breathed, his hands now resting on her hips as she sat upright.  
“Just a second.” Katherine panted. The position she was in making the work harder on herself but definitely seemed to be worth extra effort.  
“Take your time.” He smirked when her head tilted back and body tensed.  
Katherine collapsed against his chest and his arms wrapped around her, tracing shapes on her back while she caught her breath.  
“Do you want me to finish?”  
She merely nodded her response, too spent for much else.  
Rafael slipped out from underneath her, biting back a chuckle when she seemed to crumble onto the bed face down. It was the position he wanted her in anyway.  
“Lift up.” He said, tapping her bottom as he moved behind her.  
Katherine shifted, lifting high enough for him to sink into her, continuing to moan as he thrust.  
“Jesus, Raf...” Her voice muffled by the pillow.  
Rafael gripped her hips and thrust faster. Grunting moments later, both of them slumping to her bed.  
“I tried to go quickly.” He panted.  
Katherine turned in his arms so that she could drape her arm across his chest. “Don’t apologize for lasting,” she smiled, “it’s much better than the alternative.”  
“Good to know.” he smirked, kissing the top of he head.  
Katherine watched as he left her room to dispose of the condom, smiling when he pulled her closer once he crawled back under the covers.

“Morning.”  
“Morning.” Katherine smiled, stretching and cuddling closer to him.  
She hadn’t moved to the edge of the bed. She hadn’t even pulled away from him as they slept. His arms were still wrapped around her.  
“You didn’t get too warm did you?”  
“I’m comfortable.” Rafael smiled.  
“Good.”  
Katherine slipped out of his arms and grabbed a pair of pajama shorts and a black t-shirt, quickly putting them on before heading to the restroom.  
When she emerged, Rafael was sitting on her couch in his slacks and undershirt, and her coffee pot was brewing.  
“I see you found the coffee.” She smiled, sitting next to him.  
“I didn’t think you would mind.”  
“I’d offer you breakfast, but I told Amanda I’d have lunch with her at eleven and it’s already ten.” Katherine sighed.  
“You could cancel.” He smirked.  
“I already canceled our Friday plans, but if you want you could come over tonight.”  
“I can do that.”  
“Ok.” She smiled.  
“Are you showering before lunch with Rollins?”  
“You can call her Amanda.” Katherine chuckled.  
“No, I really can’t.” He smirked.  
“I need to take a quick one, why?”  
“Do you care if I stick around and drink coffee while you do?”  
“I’ll be quick.” She grinned, giving him a kiss as she hopped up to take her shower.

Rafael poured her a cup of coffee when he heard the water cut off. She hadn’t washed her hair, but had brushed through it before exiting the bathroom with just a towel wrapped around her. It had held up surprisingly well, but she still planned to throw it in a ponytail.  
“You really are beautiful.” Rafael smiled, wrapping his arms around her when she stopped to pick up the coffee mug he had prepared for her.  
“You’re not so bad yourself.” Katherine grinned, giving him a quick kiss then turning her attention to her coffee.  
Both of them had moved back to her room, Rafael making it difficult for her to get dressed as he playfully kept unbuttoning the shirt she had chosen to wear, his lips finding her neck and shoulders when he did.  
Katherine chuckled when there was a knock at her door. “That would be Amanda and since you’ve seemed to enjoy preventing me from being ready on time, you can let her in.”  
Rafael let out a little huff and grabbed his dress shirt from her bed, buttoning it as he made his way to her front door.  
“Barba.” Amanda stammered, not expecting him to still be there.  
“Rollins.” He greeted, opening the door wider for her. “Kate is just finishing getting dressed.”  
“You’re not quite finished yourself.” Amanda said, lifting her brows as she glanced at his bare feet and untucked shirt.  
Rafael gave her a less than amused look and went back to Katherine’s room to tuck his shirt in and find the rest of his clothing.  
They joined Amanda in the living room once they were both dressed. “Text me when you want me to come back over.” Rafael said, ignoring the eye roll from Amanda.  
“Ok.”  
“See you tonight.” He smiled, giving Katherine a kiss, leaving the two women in her living room.

“You’re seeing him again... tonight?” Amanda asked once the door closed.  
“I am.” Katherine smiled.  
Amanda chuckled under her breath and shook her head.  
“What?” Katherine huffed.  
“Nothing.”  
“I like him.”  
“I noticed, it’s just... it’s Barba.”  
“You can call him Rafael.” Katherine smirked.  
“No, I really can’t.”  
Katherine laughed at the fact that her response had been identical to Rafael’s when she mentioned he could call her Amanda.  
“What?”  
“Nothing, you and Rafael seem to be on the same page about using the others first name.” Katherine smiled.

They were hanging out at Amanda’s apartment after lunch, both enjoying a glass of wine from the bottle they had started the Sunday before.  
“Can I ask you a personal question?” Amanda asked.  
“About Rafael?”  
“No, I’d actually prefer to know as little about what the two of you do when you’re alone as possible.” Amanda chuckled.  
“Except whether or not he’s any good in bed?” Katherine lifted her brow.  
“I was just curious, if you notice I didn’t ask for details.”  
“What was your question?”  
“How come you and Scott never had kids? I assume you want them.”  
“You assume, because I teach elementary, I want kids?” Katherine questioned.  
“Well, yes... Do you not?”  
“No, I do. I though we would when we were dating. We even talked about them.”  
“Then why didn’t you?” Amanda asked.  
“I had wanted to be married for a bit before rushing into children and then... I couldn’t bring a child into that toxic environment.” Katherine sighed.  
“So, did you tell Scott you didn’t want kids?”  
“Not exactly. I kept my birth control hidden and never brought the subject of children up. In my defense, he didn’t talk about wanting kids either.”  
“Then why hide your birth control?” Amanda questioned. It seemed like an odd thing to do.  
“I was afraid if he saw it and knew I was actively preventing a pregnancy that he might decide he wanted a baby. It may have been an irrational fear, but it seemed like he’d do things like that some times... just to get a reaction out of me. I mean a kid would be a pretty drastic way to get a reaction, but making me feel guilty for preventing him from having one was more what I was afraid of.” Katherine sighed.  
Amanda shook her head. “He just never came off that way. He always seemed so sweet and caring when I came home to visit and we’d go out.”  
“Yeah my parents love him. My mom still thinks I’ve made a big mistake. I think seeing how different he was, depending on who we were around, really solidified the fact that he could control how he treated me. That he was purposefully manipulating me to get the upper hand. It’s like the further I get from everything, the clearer things become.”  
“Do you think he was faithful?”  
“Honestly, I have no idea. I got tested shortly after the divorce was finalized just to be on the safe side.”  
“Are you still on the pill?”  
“I am.” Katherine said, furrowing her brow. “Why?”  
“I just... I guess you didn’t need that condom after all.”  
“Condoms don’t only to prevent babies.” Katherine chuckled.  
“Yes, but I assume Barba’s pretty safe.” Amanda said, rolling her eyes.  
“I don’t know... you don’t get to be that good without experience.”  
Amanda groaned when Katherine wiggled her eyebrows.  
“We’ll have a conversation at some point, and until then we’ll practice safe sex.” Katherine smiled.  
“Ok, no more talk of sex and Barba in the same conversation.” Amanda huffed.  
“What about you?”  
“What about me?” Amanda questioned.  
“Do you want kids?”  
“Maybe... I don’t know. I’m kind of a mess half the time and the guys I date aren’t exactly father types.”  
“Didn’t that Nick guy mention having a daughter?” Katherine questioned.  
“He did and he has a son he just found out about.”  
“Oh...”  
“It’s not like that. He is actually a good father. I’m just not sure you can call what we’re doing dating.” Amanda sighed.  
“Then what is it?”  
“Convenience maybe... I don’t know. He’s been through a lot recently.”  
“You always did go for complicated.” Katherine giggled.  
“Ok I changed my mind. I don’t want someone who knows me as well as you living in New York.” Amanda chuckled, tossing a pillow from her couch at Katherine.  
“Too late, besides Atlanta doesn’t have a Rafael.”  
“You definitely want kids one day?” Amanda asked again.  
“Are you worried your ADA will reproduce?” Katherine giggled.  
“Now that’s a scary thought...”  
Katherine chunked the pillow back at Amanda.  
“I just think you’d make a good mom.” Amanda chuckled.


	5. Chapter 5

 

The bullpen was relatively quiet when Katherine walked in. A few people she hadn’t seen before sat at various desk around the open space. For a moment she thought she had gotten off on the wrong floor, but then Liv and Carisi rounded a corner.  
“Kate, right?” Carisi asked, noticing her.  
“Yes. You’re Carisi?” She smiled, it had been a few weeks since she had met the people Amanda worked with at the bar that evening, though Amanda mentioned them enough she knew his name.  
“Sonny, please,” he smiled, “are you looking for Rollins?”  
“I am.”  
“She should be back any moment. You can hang out at my desk while you wait.” Carisi offered.  
Katherine followed him, sitting at the chair he gestured to.  
“Are you two having dinner?” Carisi asked.  
“We are, unless you guys have picked up a case.”  
“No y’all?” Carisi chuckled.  
“I’m sorry?” Katherine questioned, not following his question.  
“You said you guys instead of y’all... Amanda always says y’all.” He clarified.  
Katherine chuckled. “Yeah, I’ve never really used y’all. I know it’s common in the south, but I’ve never been fond of it.”  
“Are you from Atlanta originally?”  
“No. My parents moved there while I was in high school.”  
“From where?” He inquired.  
“Austin.”  
“Texas?”  
“Yes.”  
“And still no y’all?” Carisi smirked.  
“Not everyone from the south has a southern drawl.” Katherine smiled, doing her best Georgian accent.  
Carisi was quiet for a moment as he looked at her.  
“What?” Katherine asked, furrowing her brow.  
“Do you have a boyfriend?”  
Katherine paused, clearly unsure of how to answer him.  
“It’s not that complicated of a question.” Carisi smirked.  
“It’s new. We haven’t exactly discussed labels, but I’m not looking to date anyone else.” She replied.  
“Lucky him.” Carisi smiled.  
“How do you know it’s a him?” Katherine questioned, lifting her brow.  
“Oh... or her... is it a her?”  
“No, it’s a him.” She grinned.  
“Sorry I’m late,” Amanda said, interrupting the conversation, “Fin drives like an old man.”  
“No. I just don’t think the badge gives me an excuse to speed when I don’t have a reason.” Fin countered.  
“Like Amanda needs an excuse.” Katherine chuckled.

Do you want a Martini?” Amanda asked. They had been seated, but Katherine had stood again to find the restroom.  
“Yes. This week has been long and I don’t even feel like I’ve done anything.” Katherine sighed before heading in the direction the hostess had pointed that the restrooms were.  
When she returned, their drinks had arrived and Amanda had ordered an appetizer.  
“So it’s been a long week?” Amanda asked, shoving a forkful of calamari in her mouth.  
“Hungry?” Katherine chuckled.  
“I’ve been running around the city all day and forgot to eat lunch.” She shrugged. Katherine chuckled again and Amanda rolled her eyes. “So why was your week so long?”  
“Just boring, mandatory professional development, repeating the same information I’ve heard for the last ten years or so. I did get some lesson plans reworked in between the games we had to play.” Katherine replied.  
“Games?” Amanda questioned, lifting her brow.  
“Examples of how we can engage our students, but using our training topics instead of the standards we have to teach.”  
“Were they engaging?” Amanda chuckled.  
“No, but I get the purpose. They’re to make sure we’re paying attention and give us ideas for our classroom.” Katherine grumbled.  
“To make sure you’re not working on other things... like your lesson plans.” Amanda smiled.  
“Exactly,” Katherine smirked, “honestly, it would be more beneficial to sit with our grade levels and create a few engagement activities we could actually use the following year.”  
“You like your school?”  
“I love my school.” Katherine smiled.  
“When’s the last time you talked to your mom?”  
“That’s slightly random.”  
“I was just curious. You never mention her and I didn’t know how well you were getting along after...”  
“The divorce.” Katherine interrupted, doing the best interpretation of her mother’s shame she could manage. “I talked to her a week after I moved to let her know I had settled in ok and all she could tell me was that I had made a huge mistake and that one day I’d see that and it would be too late. She can call me if she wants, but I really don’t want to listen to her uninformed opinions on my life.”  
The waiter stopped by to get their dinner orders and Katherine ordered another Martini having downed the first one.  
“She may be more on your side now.”  
“Why?”  
“Just...” Amanda sighed, “nothing.”  
Katherine furrowed her brow. “What?”  
“It’s been a year. She may have come around.”  
“Then she can call me.” Katherine huffed.  
“Ok... lets change the subject.” Amanda said, lifting her hands up in a form of surrender.  
“Sorry... it’s just my mom made things so much worse than they needed to be.” Katherine apologized.  
“I get that, you’ve met my mom right?” Amanda smiled.  
“How are you and Nick?” Katherine grinned.  
“Still not me and Nick.” Amanda replied, rolling her eyes.  
“But you are sleeping together?”  
“Yes. It’s complicated and I try not to get attached to complicated.” Amanda shrugged.  
Katherine chewed on her lip a moment. “That’s probably for the best.”  
“Why?” Amanda clipped.  
“Woah, defensive much?” Katherine chuckled.  
“Why do you think it’s a bad idea to get attached?”  
“Because you wont tell me anything about him, you keep telling me it’s complicated, and you two work together. I really have nothing else to go on.” Katherine shrugged.  
“Oh, I thought Barba might have said something.”  
“I’ve never mentioned Nick to Rafael. I didn’t think you wanted anyone to know and you do work with Rafael.”  
“I just thought you might have asked him what he thought of him, they don’t always see eye to eye.” Amanda stated.  
“Bringing up Nick without context could give Raf the impression that I might be interested... and I’m only interested in Rafael.” Katherine smiled.  
“You and Carisi were pretty chatty when I walked up.” Amanda smirked.  
“I’m pretty sure he almost asked me out.” Katherine whispered.  
“Why are you whispering, no one here knows who Carisi is.”  
Katherine shook her head and rolled her eyes.  
“What did you tell him?” Amanda asked.  
“The truth, that I’m seeing someone.”  
“Did you tell him it was Barba?” Amanda’s eyes looked mischievous causing Katherine to frown.  
“No. I don’t know how private Rafael is at work.”  
“Pretty private, no one even suspects he’s seeing someone. I’m pretty sure an ‘he really needs to get laid’ is muttered most days we see him.” Amanda chuckled.  
“Even by you?” Katherine lifted her brow and Amanda grinned. “Thanks...” Katherine muttered.  
“It’s all in good fun.”

“Did you get her drunk, Rollins?” Rafael grumbled as the two women giggled up the stairs toward Katherine’s apartment, Katherine seeming to be leaning on Amanda more than supporting herself.  
“Relax Barba, she only had a martini or two more than she’d normally drink. We’ve just been laughing as we climbed the steps.” Rollins smiled.  
“I am a bit buzzed though.” Katherine giggled as Amanda more or less handed her over to Rafael, her arms wrapping around his neck to steady herself. “They were kind of strong...”  
Rafael rolled his eyes as Amanda leaned against the wall and Katherine fumbled to find her keys.  
“Been waiting long?” Rollins smirked.  
“I texted him when we left the restaurant.” Katherine said, triumphantly pulling her keys from her purse.  
“I’ll get the door.” Rafael huffed, taking the keys from her.  
Once he had the door opened he pulled Katherine inside. “Bye Rollins.”  
“Night Barba, Kate.” Rollins smiled.  
“Bye Amanda.” Katherine giggled, despite her body tensing as Rafael shut the door.  
She stood quietly as he locked the door, watching him, almost afraid to speak, but then she remembered he wasn’t Scott. “Are you mad at me?”  
Rafael furrowed his brow as he walked back to where she stood, his arm wrapping around her waist. “Why would I be mad at you?”  
“I’ve been drinking and you were snappy with Amanda and...”  
“I’m always snappy with Rollins,” he smirked pulling her tighter in his arms, “and I know the two of you drink together when you go eat on Fridays. I wouldn’t care if you were so drunk you couldn’t stand on your own... a little disappointed that I’d have to tuck you in bed and cuddle up next to you only to sleep, but not mad.”  
He was smiling and Katherine visibly relaxed. “Ok.”  
“Did you really think I was mad?”  
“You were huffy with Amanda, that’s all I guess.” Katherine sighed.  
Truthfully, it wasn’t him at all. If she had come home this tipsy to her ex husband he would have told her how irresponsible she had been and made her feel bad for relaxing with a friend after work. He had done it so often she had stopped joining her coworkers altogether, always making an excuse of being too tired. When in reality, she hadn’t wanted to listen to Scott bitch.  
“I can be nicer to... Amanda.” He offered.  
“Oh, that was hard for you.” She chuckled.  
“What, saying Amanda?” Rafael smirked.  
“Yes.” Katherine smiled.  
“I can be nicer to her if you want.” He said a bit more seriously this time.  
“Just be yourself, even if you’re huffy with Amanda. It’s not you anyway... I’ll work on that.”  
He kissed the top of her head, taking her hand and pulling her to her couch. “You know you can tell me if you want.”  
“I appreciate that, but when I’m with you I’d prefer to not think about Scott at all.” Katherine smiled.  
“Then know that I’m not going to be upset with you unless you actually do something to hurt me in some way, but I’m always going to annoy Rollins.” Rafael smiled.  
“I can live with that.”  
“Good.” He smirked, pulling her up from the couch and into his arms.  
“Rafael!” Katherine squealed when she almost tripped, his arms catching her.  
“How drunk are you?” Rafael breathed, his eyes locked with hers, his lips close.  
“Not that drunk, just a little tipsy.” Katherine smiled and bit her lip.  
Rafael smirked and lifted one brow. “So I should carry you to your bedroom?”  
“Don’t you dare.” Katherine scolded.  
“But I have to make sure you get there safely.” He said feigning concern.  
“Rafael Barba!” She squealed trying to sound mad as he lifter her into his arms and carried her to her bed, but her giggling betrayed her.

Rafael was still peacefully sleeping next to her when she opened her eyes. Katherine glanced at the clock and decided to go ahead and get up when she saw that it was eight. Quietly, she slipped out of bed, into shorts and a t-shirt, and made her way to the kitchen to start coffee. She glanced at the three different books she had started but didn’t feel like reading and didn’t want to risk waking Rafael by turning the television on. Instead she grabbed her phone off the counter and poured herself a cup of coffee. She sat on the couch intending to check e-mails when her mother popped into her head.  
“Thanks Amanda...” She muttered under her breath. Still it had been a year since she had spoken to her mom...  
Katherine sighed and moved back to the kitchen in an attempt to not wake Rafael and pressed the contact for her mother.  
“Katie, sweetheart, how are you? How’s New York?” Natalie Morgan said as she answered the phone.  
“It’s great mom, I’m great. How are you and dad?” Katherine smiled, relieved her mom sounded happy to hear from her.  
“We are doing good. Maybe we can come visit you sometime, see where you’re living?” Natalie smiled.  
Katherine resisted the urge to sigh, knowing her mother would disapprove of her tiny living space, but agreed they should visit. “That would be nice mom.”  
“Tell me are you seeing anyone?”  
“I am actually.” Katherine smiled, fighting a smirk when Rafael wandered out of her bedroom in only his under shirt and boxer briefs.  
“What does he do? Is he good looking? See I miss all the good gossip now that you’re so far away.” Natalie pressed.  
“He’s very attractive and he’s a prosecutor.” Katherine said, quietly chuckling when Rafael pointed at himself and mouthed the words, “Are you talking about me?”  
“His name?” Katherine rephrased her mothers question while moving closer to Rafael. “I don’t know mom, it’s still kind fo early in the relationship. I’ll tell you once we’ve label things.”  
Rafael rolled his eyes and pulled her into his arms, coffee already in hand. “You can tell her my name.” He whispered when he heard her mother arguing on the other end.  
“Fine, it’s Rafael Barba.” Katherine smiled, watching him take a sip.  
“Oh my he is attractive.” Natalie exhaled.  
“Mom, did you just google him?” Katherine scolded as Rafael smirked, having heard her mother through the phone.  
“What I’m nosy. Definitely a step up from Scott look wise and successful...” Natalie stated, trailing off a bit and Katherine knew she was reading about him.  
“Mom!”  
“What? You deserve better than that scum you were married to.” Natalie grumbled.  
“Well that’s a one eighty.” Katherine huffed, quietly looking up to apologize to Rafael, who hadn’t let her go yet. He shook his head not to worry about it and ran his fingers through her hair.  
“That was before I found out he knocked up Carianne’s daughter. You remember her, that blond bimbo looking thing that was barely smart enough to finish high school.” Natalie scoffed.  
“What?”  
“Yeah, about a month before you left him. He didn’t know it at the time, hell she didn’t even know she was pregnant until the first trimester was over, kept right on drinking too. I sure hope that baby...”  
“Mom!” Katherine interrupted, pulling out of Rafael’s arms and moving to sit on the couch.  
“What? I was going to say I hope the baby is ok.”  
“Did it occur to you that I might not want to know any of that?” Katherine sighed.  
“I thought that’s why you left him.” Natalie said  
“No mom, it’s not.”  
“Oh well, either way, good riddance.” Natalie stated and kept right on talking, though Katherine had stopped listening.  
Rafael sat his coffee on a coaster on the coffee table and sat next to her, taking her hand in his.  
“Hey mom, I’ve got another call, can I call you later?” Katherine said looking up at Rafael.  
“Oh, ok. Is that your boyfriend?”  
“Yes it’s Rafael.” Katherine smiled, shaking her head slightly when Rafael smiled.  
“Ok. I love you sweetheart.”  
“Love you too mom.”  
Katherine hung up the phone and made eye contact with him. “I take it you heard that?”  
“That your ex husband is an even bigger idiot than I already thought he was? No I didn’t hear any of that.” Rafael pushed his bottom lip up and shook his head though the corner of his lips were turned up slightly and his eyes had crinkled into a smile.  
“Thanks.” Katherine smiled, resting her head on his chest.  
“For what?”  
“For being you.”  
“I don’t know how to be anyone else.” He replied, chuckling when she smacked his chest with the back of her hand and sat up again so she could see him. “You can call me your boyfriend... you know... if you want to.”  
“Ok.” Katherine smiled.  
“Does that mean you will?”  
“Depends,” Katherine smirked, climbing onto his lap, “will you be calling me your girlfriend?”  
“I will be.” He smiled when her hands reached into his hair.  
“So will I then.” She smiled leaning forward to kiss him.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now we’re back to the double space thing... I really don’t know why it stopped for a few chapters...
> 
>  
> 
> ***disregard that the actual cost of the five bedroom penthouse’s picture I used would be completely unrealistic... it’s the feel of the place not the actual place. :)***

 

“Damn... so their baby would be about five months old now...” Amanda stated, having done the math in her head.

“I guess. Did you know? You were going on about my mom being more on my side now...” Katherine asked.

Amanda avoided eye contact and took a drink of water before answering. “My mom mentioned that your mom said Scott had a kid now. I didn’t know the details, only that your mom was pissed. I didn’t want to say anything until I knew for sure.”

“I get that. Honestly, I’m glad I heard it from her instead of you.” Katherine sighed.

“Are you ok?”

“It doesn’t really effect me.” Katherine shrugged.

“Yeah, but still...” Amanda said, giving Katherine a look that said she didn’t buy her attempt to just shrug this off.

“I mean how long has he been sleeping with her? Did it start when we stopped having sex or had he been sleeping with her for years? Were there others? Was he as bad in bed with them or had he just lost interest in me?” Katherine sighed when she spoke her last question.

“Kate...”

Katherine took a breath and steadied herself. “No. It doesn’t matter. He’s a controlling, emotionally abusive bastard who I left. And honestly, he was never very good in bed. Whatever he did or didn’t do while we were married doesn’t matter anymore. I’m happy. Happier than I’ve been in years. Definitely happier than I ever was with him. And I’m not the one stuck spending the rest of my life connected to some idiot who can barely spell her own name.”

“Yeah, you’re just fine...” Amanda chuckled.

“It’s just the initial shock of finding out. I don’t actually care.”

“Barba was there when you found out?” Amanda asked.

“He was, my mom doesn’t exactly know how to talk quietly.” Katherine chuckled.

“How’d he react?”

“He said Scott was an even bigger idiot than he already thought he was and then told me I could call him my boyfriend.” Katherine smiled.

“He chose that moment to label your relationship?” Amanda questioned, furrowing her brow.

“It had to do more with an earlier part of the conversation with my mom. I promise it was the perfect timing.” Katherine smirked.

“Good man.” Amanda smiled.

 

Katherine had barely set her purse down after entering her apartment from lunch with Amanda when her phone rang.

“Hey mom.” She sighed, dropping down on her couch.

“Your dad has some vacation time he needs to use and I thought we’d come visit before the summer was over and you have to go back to work. When in July would work for you?” Natalie asked and Katherine could tell she had a pen and paper ready to take down some possible dates.

“I’ve got a seminar I’m leading the week of the fifteenth and will be busy getting ready for it the week before, so the week after would probably be better.” Katherine replied.

“Either one, the twenty second or the twenty ninth?”

“Either one.”

“Ok. The week of the twenty second works best for us. Can you schedule a dinner with your boyfriend? Your dad and I would like to meet him.” Natalie stated.

“I’ll do my best, his job isn’t exactly predictable or flexible.”

“Dinner, lunch... coffee if that’s all he has time for. I’d just like to meet him.”

“Text me your itinerary once you book flights and I’ll figure something out.” Katherine assured her, though she wasn’t exactly sure how Rafael would react to meeting her parents.

“Do we need to get a hotel or do you have a guest room?” Natalie asked.

“I barely have a one bedroom.”

“Oh...” her mother paused and Katherine braced herself for a comment on her living space, “we’ll get a hotel then. The cost of living in New York is much higher than Atlanta huh sweetheart?”

“That it is.” Katherine smiled, relieved that her mother was being sensible... or maybe just trying to be nice. Either way she’d take it.

 

After getting off the phone with her mom she just kind of sat on her couch, staring at nothing on the wall. Katherine hadn’t really had a moment to process the information she had received about Scott on her own yet. She and Rafael had spent all of Saturday held up in her apartment... her mind never once moving back to Scott. Rafael’s mouth, tongue, hands... other appendages... proved to be quite the distraction, though distraction might not be the best word. When she was with Rafael, her mind never wandered to anyone besides the man with those intense green eyes she loved and at the same time was slightly intimidated to make contact with. Now she was alone. Rafael had left earlier that morning to catch up on paperwork so he wouldn’t have to spend his evenings at the office next week and her lunch plans with Amanda were over. This left just Katherine alone with her thoughts in her tiny apartment.

 

_“Where have you been?” Katherine asked when Scott stumbled in well after midnight. “Just out with a buddy.” He slurred. “Who?” She asked. Scott had never been the type to stay out drinking. This had been at least two years before she left him, at least a year before they had stopped having sex altogether... “Just a buddy.” He huffed and she dropped it. It was late and she wanted to sleep not fight. “I was worried, you never replied to my text asking if you were ok.” Katherine smiled, moving closer to him. “My phone died.” He stated, shutting the bathroom door before she could reach him. Katherine stood outside the door that had basically been shut in her face and seethed. He hadn’t even told her he was going out, just stumbled in after ignoring her text all evening. If she had done something like this... the double standard he held her to was infuriating and she was done playing nice. “You’re an ass you know that.” She yelled through the door. “Why, because I had a few drinks with a buddy after work?” He yelled back. “If I had gone out with friends and didn’t bother to tell you, would you have been calm?” She barked. “What friends?” Was his response and there was a twinge of humor behind it that made her skin crawl. Katherine didn’t respond, she didn’t know how to. She had friends, but no one she really went out with anymore. Just work friends and people she talked to on the phone. “I didn’t think you were like that.” Scott huffed, exiting the bathroom in only his boxers and climbing in bed. “Like what?” She snapped. “A nagging, controlling wife.” He smiled. “I’m not... I was just worried. You never even told me you were going out after work and then you never responded to my text... I just wanted to know you were ok.” She sighed, climbing on her side of the bed. “I’m fine.” He smiled again, gesturing to his unharmed body laying next to her. “I guess you’re right.” She smiled, reaching to graze his cheek with her thumb, but he caught her hand in his and stopped her, his face twisting into the briefest expression of disgust before relaxing again. It was so brief she thought maybe she’d imagined it, but the sting was still there. “I’m tired, maybe tomorrow.” He said softly. “Oh... ok.” She hadn’t actually wanted to have sex, just feel a bit of intimacy between them after their argument. Instead she took her hand back and turned so she faced away from him not daring to make a sound as the tears silently fell._

 

“Fucking asshole...” She muttered to herself as she pulled her laptop out from the space under the couch where she kept it when it was charging. The charger itself plugged into a surge protector behind her couch. She brought up her Facebook page that she really only used to keep up with people when she didn’t feel like calling, hardly ever posting anything herself. Katherine was friends with Carianne because of how close she was with her mother. Chelsea, Carianne’s daughter, had friended her at one time, but given the situation she didn’t know if she would still be on her friends list or not, she hadn’t remembered seeing any post pop up in her feed recently. It didn’t take long for her to find Chelsea on her friends list, which truthfully surprised her. Her cursor hovered over Chelsea’s picture as she debated whether she really wanted to click on it or not.

“You’re pathetic.” She sighed as she clicked on the picture.

Chelsea’s profile picture had just been her, but once on her page she saw pictures of Scott in almost every post. How had none of these shown up on her feed? Maybe Katherine just didn’t get on very often anymore. Katherine clicked through Chelsea’s photo’s, almost obsessively looking at her ex husband’s little family. The baby was cute, but she thought most babies were cute. Scott’s hair was thinner and Katherine couldn’t help but smile when she thought of Rafael’s thick head of hair. The hair loss had always been a sore topic for him. Even with the receding hairline Scott was an attractive man, but not nearly as attractive as she found Rafael. She shook her head and exhaled, stopping herself from comparing Rafael to her ex any further. She clicked on a picture of the three of them. They seemed happy, but then again everyone thought she and Scott had been happy.

“What am I doing?” Katherine scolded herself, making her way back to Chelsea’s main profile page and clicked the unfriend button. Her curiosity had been sated and she didn’t feel it was healthy or fair to Rafael to spend anymore time obsessing over this.

A text from Rafael came through just as she closed her laptop. “Do you want me to come to you or do you want to actually come to my apartment for a change?”

Katherine could almost see his facial expression, the raised eyebrows she imagined causing her to bite back a smile. “I’ll come to you. What’s your address?”

“I can pick you up.”

“What time?”

“I’ll be there in an hour. Pack a bag, I don’t plan on letting you leave tonight.” This was sent with a winking face and all thoughts of her past were gone from her mind. Only Rafael and now her curiosity of what his apartment looked like.

 

“Hi.” Katherine smiled opening the door to let Rafael in when he knocked.

“Hi.” He smirked.

Katherine chuckled and grabbed her bag, taking his hand when he offered it and followed him back down to the car he undoubtedly had waiting for them.

“Do you live far from me?” She asked once they were seated in the back.

“Not that far, maybe twenty minutes by car.”

“And by train?”

“Thirty or so... I’m really not sure, I haven’t taken the subway in years.” He smiled.

“Really? I’m fascinated by it.” Katherine chuckled.

“That’s because you didn’t grow up with it. Believe me the newness will wear off.” Rafael smirked.

“I don’t know. I really enjoy people watching.”

“Eventually, you will be able to list all the stereotypes you see on the train without having to actually smell them.” He scoffed.

“My boyfriend the snob.” She teased.

“I did my time.” He chuckled, pulling her closer.

 

“There’s an elevator.” Katherine smiled as he pressed the call button. She knew once they pulled up and the doorman opened the car door for her that there would be an elevator she just enjoyed hearing what kind of response he’d give her playful comments.

“Well, I’m sure as hell not climbing up thirty flights of stairs.” He grumbled.

Katherine chuckled. She had only mentioned the elevator because he liked to complain about the stairs in her building. “You live on the thirtieth floor?”

“Thirty third.” He smirked, ushering her in the elevator and pressing the number for his floor.

They rode in silence, Katherine glanced at him from the corner of her eye, biting back a smiled as he impatiently watched the light move across the numbers indicating the floor they were passing.

“What?”

“Nothing.” She grinned.

Rafael rolled his eyes and took her hand in his, gently tugging her behind him once they reached his floor.

“My god...” Katherine gasped when they entered the apartment.

“It’s nice huh?” He smiled, dragging her further inside.

The kitchen alone seemed to be the size of her apartment, not that that took much, and it overlooked a large living room, all of which were surrounded by twelve foot high windows, giving her a view of Central Park in its entirety.

“Nice is an understatement.” She chuckled, following him through the very clean and modern living room to a short hallway with four doors.

“Half bath, guest room, home office, there’s another restroom connecting the two rooms,” he said pointing to the open doors as they passed them, “and my room.” He was standing at the threshold but hadn’t entered yet.

“Your room huh?” Katherine smirked, attempting to peak passed him.

Rafael smiled and pulled her to him, pressing his lips to hers when she pressed to her tip toes to look over his shoulder.

“Are you trying to distract me?” She chuckled between kisses as he backed them into his bedroom.

“You just seemed so eager.” He laughed, letting her go so she could look around the room.

“It’s not really what I expected.” She said, setting her bag on the floor at the foot of his bed.

“What did you expect?” He smirked.

“There’s just so much window...” Katherine exhaled, moving to look at the view, “I kind of expected something darker... not dark... just a little less bright and open.”

“I seem dark and brooding?”

“No... yes... sometimes...” She chucked, grinning when he wrapped his arms around her waist.

She was still looking out the window when his lips pressed against her neck and his fingers started unbuttoning the fitted plaid shirt she had worn.

“Can anyone see in here?” Katherine panted as his hands gripped her breast, her head leaning back against his shoulder.

Rafael tugged her shirt off and reached to unclasped her bra, slipping it down her arms. “Maybe... if they have a telescope or binoculars.”

“That doesn’t worry you?”

Her hands reached behind her and into his hair while his slid down her stomach, unbuttoning the top button on her jeans.

“Not really.”

Katherine turned to face him, tugging the fitted shirt he was wearing over his head and walking him towards his bed, her hands tugging his pants tighter so she could unfasten them as well. His lips pressed to hers as they both shimmied out of their remaining clothing.

Rafael climbed on top of her as she inched backwards on his bed, his kisses moving down her neck, her chest, her torso, settling between her legs, eliciting a quick gasp from her as his tongue made contact with her clit.

“Jesus.” She groaned, gripping his hair tightly and aching her back as he alternated between licking and gently sucking on her. He gripped her hips when he felt her buck against him, softening his touch as she came back down.

“You want me to return the favor?” She panted, smiling when when his lips pressedagainst hers again.

“I want to be inside you.” Rafael hummed against her neck, his body flushed up against hers as he laid between her legs.

She could feel him pressing into her, sliding further in when he shifted to kiss her lips again. “I’ll grab a condom.” He sighed, starting to pull back.

Katherine gripped his arm and pulled him back towards her. “I’m on the pill.” She breathed, not wanting to lose contact with him, even if it was just for a moment. Rafael’s eyes bounced between hers and he pushed further into her, enjoying the feel of her with nothing between them. Her walls still pressed tightly against him, a feeling that resulted in him moaning into their kiss as he bottomed out.

“Fuck.” Shepanted, breaking the kiss as he thrust into her.

Rafael braced himself on his left arm, using his other hand to touch her cheek, down her neck, rolling her nipple between his thumb and forefinger, never once slowing the pace with which he pumped into her.

He grunted above her, both of them making eye contact, at least until his mouth found hers again.

Katherine’s core tightened, buckling her forward slightly before her body arched and her head pulled back. Rafael’s lips moved to her neck as she twitched beneath him finishing not far behind her.

“When did you decide to get on the pill?” He panted against her neck, still collapsed on top of her.

“Twelve years ago.” Katherine chuckled.

“So the condoms were more for...”

“I got tested right after I moved here and I didn’t really know you that well.” She smiled up at him.

“It’s a little after the fact, but I’m clean.” He smirked.

“Well that’s a relief.” She teased before pressing her lips back to his.

 

Rafael had pulled her into his arms under the covers. Both of them laying quietly, Katherine still a bit mesmerized by his view of the city, a view she could enjoy even from their intimate position cuddled in his bed. Her mind noting how much her mother would love this view... or at least love to brag to her friends that her daughter was dating the man who owned this view.

“Shit.” She muttered, remember her parents upcoming visit and her mothers desire to meet Rafael.

“What?”

“My parents are coming to visit in July and my mom wants to meet you.”

“So schedule a dinner. I give good parent.” He said, smiling when she rotated in his arms to face him.

“You’re sure?”

“I am.” Rafael nodded and pulled her closer.

“Do you have food in that pretty kitchen of yours?” Katherine chuckled.

“I do. Are you’re hungry?”

“Starved.”

“Well if you’re starved...” Rafael said, slipping his underwear back on as he climbed out of bed.

Katherine shook her head and started grabbing her own clothes. “Just the panties and shirt. I plan on taking everything back off you after we eat.” He smirked.

“Do you plan on sleeping at all tonight?” She chuckled, slipping on the clothing he’d mentioned.

“Will you be too tired if I keep you up?”

“I’m not the one who has to work in the morning.” Katherine smiled, playfully smacking his ass as she passed him on her way to the kitchen.

 


	7. Chapter 7

 

Katherine grumbled incoherently when Rafael’s alarm went off, pushing at his shoulder but never actually waking. Rafael smiled and quickly shut his alarm off, yawning as he sat up, his eyes making their way to the woman lying next to him. Her breathing had leveled out again, her hair was half covering her face, and her arms wrapped around the pillow. Carefully, he climbed out of bed, not wanting to disturb her and made his way to the bathroom to shower.

When he returned to his bedroom, fully dressed and ready for the work day, he quietly chuckled to himself at the fact that she hadn’t moved. Instead of waking her, he grabbed the spare key he kept in his desk drawer and a sheet of stationary paper his mother had given him with his initials, RB, printed in a dark navy blue on the bottom right corner. He scripted out a note for her and left both the key and the note next to her phone on his nightstand before heading to work.

 

Katherine squeezed the pillow tighter and then stretched, blinking a few times as her eyes adjusted to the light. His sheets were really soft and she pulled them tighter around her as she turned to face where she had expected to find Rafael. The side of the bed he had slept on was of course empty since he had left for work over two hours ago. Katherine sat up and glanced at his clock, nine thirty. Yawning as she rubbed her eyes, she reached for her phone noticing the note and key sitting next to it.

_Katherine,_

_As much as I wanted to, and believe me I wanted to... I couldn’t bring myself to wake you. Not knowing how little sleep you had had when my alarm went off. I’ve set the coffee maker up so all you have to do is press start. There’s eggs, bacon, fruit, and other possible breakfast foods in the kitchen if you’re hungry. Help yourself. Feel free to shower or anything else you need to do to get ready for the day. Seriously, mi casa es tu casa. I’ll get the key from you at dinner tonight, 7pm? I hope your sleep was as peaceful as it looked._  

_Rafael_

She climbed out of his bed and slipped on her underwear and shirt from yesterday, smiling as she made her way to the kitchen to start coffee.

“You have really pretty handwriting.”

Her text was almost immediately returned. “Please tell me you’re roaming around my apartment in what you slept in.”

“I didn’t sleep in anything last night.”

“I know.”

Katherine rolled her eyes at the smirk she knew was plastered across his face. “I’m wearing what I ate dinner in last night.”

“That’s actually better.”

“Don’t you have work to do?”

“Yes, but this is more fun.”

She smiled at his comment and poured coffee in the cup he had set out for her. “You’re really cute.”

“So are you, but duty calls... your friend and Carisi are heading my way.”

“Lucky them.” She grinned as she pressed send, taking a sip of coffee.

“See you at seven.”

 

Katherine moved to the window to look out, coffee in one hand her phone in the other. Careful not to spill, she sat the coffee mug on the hardwood floor and used her phone’s camera to check that the makeup she hadn’t removed from yesterday wasn’t smeared all over her face. She cleaned up the few smudges around her eyes and noticed her hair looked really good from the front. The side and back were a little crazy, and despite being slightly messy the front had volume and a nice wavy thing going that she had attempted but had never actually succeeded at styling before. She picked the mug back up and stood with her back to the window and took a picture of her self and then rotated the camera horizontal when she realized she could get Central Park nicely framed in the shot behind her. Originally, her intent was only to snap a photo to see if she could replicate the hair later, but she looked really good and that was something she rarely told herself. The lights in his apartment lit her nicely and the window all but disappeared behind her just leaving the view of Central Park surrounded by buildings.

She made her way back to the kitchen to refill her coffee mug and leaned on the counter to flip through the photo’s she had taken. “Jesus, have I ever looked this thin?” She muttered to herself. It was hard to deny though, her cheekbones and jawline were more prominent than they had ever been, her clavicle protruded clearly between the collar of her shirt drawing your eye to the little hollow point just above her sternum and the defined lines on her neck that she assumed came from muscles that had just never shown before. She lightly ran her hand along her neck almost as if to check that it was really her as she continued to scroll through the photos, stopping when she got to one she had taken mostly as a joke. She had pulled the mug closer to her mouth as though she were going to take a sip and playfully looked up and to the side. It had turned out really cute. Quickly, she scanned it to make sure the fact that she hadn’t bothered to put on pants yet wasn’t reflected in the window anywhere and texted the photo to Rafael. Then her mind went to her current Facebook profile picture, the one from three years ago, and thirty pounds ago now, that she hadn’t really cared enough to update. She chewed on her lip as she debated whether to change the photo to this one, scanning it numerous times for anything reflected in the window and finally uploaded it.

Katherine turned her attention to Rafael’s fridge. He had actually cooked for her the night before, something she hadn’t exactly expected, but was pleasantly surprised to find he was a fairly decent cook. Despite the eye roll he had given her, she had help him clean afterward and knew the dishes in the dishwasher were dirty. If she decided to eat something there she knew she could clean up after herself fairly easily. The only problem was she didn’t feel like cooking. Noticing milk she decided to check his pantry for cereal and found a box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch making her audibly laugh.

“Guilty pleasure?” She texted along with a picture of the box. Then proceeded to pour herself a bowl and lean over the counter to eat as she scrolled through the stories on one of her news app.

“Who doesn’t like Cinnamon Toast Crunch?”

Katherine chuckled at the response but didn’t reply.

“Also, you look very pretty... distracting even.”

“I was going for cute.” She replied, smiling to herself as she sent a second text. “I’m eating your cereal.”

“See, everyone likes it. And though the picture is cute, I’m sticking with pretty as my descriptor.”

“Do you want me to start your dishwasher?” She asked after rinsing the bowl and placing it and the spoon inside.

“That’s up to you.”

“You’re smirking aren’t you?” He seemed to like to poke fun at her cleaning habits.

“Yes.”

“Will you stop texting Barba, so he’ll focus.” This particular text came from Amanda.

“I’m getting scolded for distracting you.” Katherine sent, chuckling as she tried to picture the look Rafael would give Amanda.

“I can roll my eyes at her for you.”

“I’ll let you get back to work instead. I need to shower anyway.”

“You in my shower... no, nothing distracting about that?”

Katherine smiled and made her way back to his bedroom, pulling a change of clothes out of her bag and taking them with her to his master bath. The shower was much larger than hers and the water almost instantly warm. She hadn’t really thought to bring her shampoo or really any toiletries other than her toothbrush, so she was at the mercy of what ever Rafael had. Thankfully, his shampoo and body wash weren’t too masculine smelling. Wrapping a towel around her after she dried off, Katherine examined the few items out on his counter. The cologne drew her attention and she couldn’t help but to see if that was the source of his scent. It was earthy, with a soft hint of citrus... grapefruit maybe, definitely the scent she enjoyed when they were close.

After she brushed her teeth, Katherine looked to see if he happened to have a hairdryer. “Of course he does...” She chuckled, pulling it from the bin it was stored in under the sink. She used his brush while she blow dried her hair, dressed and gathered her things to leave. The note Rafael had left for her was neatly folded and place in her wallet, the key attached to her key ring so she wouldn’t lose it, and dishwasher started. She was almost to his door when she realized she didn’t exactly know where she was. Rafael had been more than distracting in the car on the way to his place and while she knew what general part of the city she was in, she had no idea what subway lines ran from her current location to her home. Rather than figure it out using the subway map at the station she decided to map it on her phone, clicking the transit option, pleased to see her route home didn’t involve a change of trains. “That’s convenient.” She murmured, smiling to herself as she exited his apartment and started her journey home.

 

It was right around noon when she reached her building, her apartment feeling extra small after her morning at Rafael’s but she still loved it. This apartment was hers... well the first place that had been just hers. She had always lived with roommates and then Scott, and while she was only renting and assumed Rafael owned, this was the first space that she had lived in alone. It was a sense of pride she rather enjoyed, no matter how small the space was or how few windows it had. It was all hers.

 

Katherine pulled out her phone to text Rafael, but decided against it seeing as she hadn’t heard from him since before her shower and assumed they were busy. Instead, she decided to nose around Facebook a bit. Other than updating her profile picture that morning and the brief time she spent obsessing over Chelsea and Scott yesterday, she hadn’t been on in a while and was curious what her teacher friends in Atlanta were up to. When she initially logged in, she was surprised to see the number of notifications she had, seeming to have forgotten the picture she had posted earlier that morning. The comments ranged from a simple, ‘cute’ to ‘New York looks good on you’ and all sorts of compliments in between with a few people asking how she was. Katherine took the time to respond, rolling her eyes when she got to her mothers comment.

“Is that from your apartment?”

Of course her mother would ask that. It was her mothers attempt at a subtle brag, not that Katherine wasn’t trying to boast a bit, but that was more about how she had looked in the photo rather than where she was. She could have been in a restaurant for anyone knew, Rafael’s coffee cups were a light grey and very simple in design, nothing that screamed someone’s home.

“No, not my apartment.” She replied vaguely, hoping her mom would call if she wanted to pry more and not post more comments. Almost regretting updating the picture... almost...

She closed her browser after clicking on a few friends and started outlining the upcoming seminar she was leading. The seminar would last the whole week with different people offering workshops on tips and ideas for the classroom in different subject areas. Katherine had volunteered to share the science journal she created with her kids and the different labs she used to go with it. She sold the pre made materials, cut outs and foldables for the journal and lab instructions, online creating a little extra income, but the way she was addressing the content was meant to help teachers create their own materials, not necessarily buy hers. If they did than that was just a little bonus. Teachers would be allowed to pick whichever workshops they wanted to attend, with her basically covering the same information twice a day for five days. This meant she had three hours to map out, to ensure she covered the material she wanted as efficiently as possible.

 

Rafael had been tempted to ask Katherine to lunch when he finished at the precinct, but figured since he had already suggested dinner that he’d let her work today. She had mentioned having to start outlining something during their dinner, but he had been slightly distracted by her legs and those little red panties that her shirt barely covered to remember exactly what. He also needed to finish more work so that he could actually make that dinner, especially if the case SVU picked up turned into more than the nothing they currently had.

“Barba?” Liv said as he headed toward the elevator.

“Yes.” He smiled, finishing up an email to Carmen asking her to get the picture Katherine had sent him printed so that it would fit in a four by six frame.

“Why are you smiling, you do realize this case is completely full of holes?”

“No reason, what did you need?” He smirked, shoving his phone in his pocket.

Liv furrowed her brow, her eyes scanning his as though she was trying to figure out what he could possibly be happy about. “Do you have a recommendation for a lawyer specializing in family court?”

“How are you adjusting to Noah?”

“I’m working on finding a routine,” she smirked, “the lawyer?”

“Langan is fully capable and familiar with both you and Noah’s case. I’d keep him if you can.”

“Oh, ok...”

“Do you not want Langan?”

“It’s not that, I just didn’t know if I needed someone more used to dealing with family court.” Liv sighed.

“He can run circles around family court. I promise you’ll be fine.” Rafael smiled, starting his path toward the elevator again.

Once outside the precinct, he made a quick stop to buy a frame before grabbing a light lunch to eat in his office. He had finished most of his lunch when Carmen returned from hers, knocking lightly on his door.

“Come in.” He called.

“You just wanted the one copy correct?” Carmen asked, handing him the picture she had printed at a drugstore on her way back from lunch.

“Correct.” He smiled, slipping the photo in the frame he had already taken the back off of.

“She’s pretty.” Carmen said as she watched him set the frame to the right of the brass bankers lamp and just behind his name plate, allowing him to glance at it easily while he worked.

“Yes she is.” He more breathed than spoke, causing Carmen to forcibly stop herself from grinning.

“Does she have a name?”

“Katherine.”

“I’ll let you get back to work.” Carmen smiled, turning to leave.

“Carmen,” he said, waiting for her to look back before he continued, “thank you.”

“No problem, Mr. Barba.”

 

It was half past five and Katherine was still busy working, having hit a nice groove, and startled slightly at the knock on her door. Setting her laptop next to her she made her way to the door, glancing out the peephole to find Amanda impatiently staring back at her.

“That was you, wasn’t it?” Amanda stated as Katherine opened the door.

“What was me?” Katherine asked watching her enter.

“Earlier, texting Barba? You never responded.”

“Oh. Yeah that was me.”

“Good. I though for a minute he was talking to someone else and I might have stressed you about who he might have been talking to, but then he made a face at me and put his phone away so I figured it was you.” Amanda stated, sitting on the couch.

“Did you pick up a new case?” Katherine asked.

“A mess of a case. We had Barba there mainly to pick his brain, but we are nowhere near ready to take it to court. We’re not even ready to make an arrest.”

Katherine glanced at the clock and smiled. “Then my date tonight shouldn’t be disrupted?”

“Didn’t you just see him last night?”

“Yes.” Katherine grinned.

Amanda rolled her eyes but smiled. Truthfully, she was happy for Katherine and though she’d never admit it, she liked seeing Barba happy.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted the note he left in a different font but couldn’t figure out how so it’s in italics... oh well.
> 
> Also, I added a bit of Barba’s perspective because there’s things I want to happen that she isn’t necessarily around for. I think it reads ok but it’s also coming from my head and I know what I’m picturing...


	8. Chapter 8

 

“Morning.” Katherine smiled when she rolled over to find Rafael watching her sleep.

“Comfortable?” He smirked.

“Incredibly” She cuddled closer to him, pulling herself up to rest her head on his chest as his arms wrapped around her. “Don’t you have work?”

“I took a personal day.”

“You know what that is?” She teased, stretching her leg over his, chuckling when he trapped it beneath his other leg.

“What did you have planned today?”

His arm was trapped between them, positioned right below her apex, but he waited until she answered to touch her.

“I need to stop by my classroom,” her voice hitched as his finger slid just inside her along her slit, “to pick up some examples of my students work.” Katherine barely finished the sentence due to that finger ever so lightly grazing her clit before starting its path up her slit again.

“Anything else?”

“Probably...” She more exhaled than spoke, her brain not being able to remember anything else as his finger traced the path again and again, probing a little deeper each time.

“Katherine.” He said her name softly, his free hand coming to rest on the back of her head.

“Yes.” She panted, looking up at him.

“I just wanted to see your face.” Rafael smiled.

Katherine returned the smile and continued to look at him, moving her own hand to stroke him as he switched from one finger to two. Still continuing the same path, inserting them before skimming up her slit and lightly circling her bud, then again, but this time circling her twice. Just when she thought she had his pattern down, he’d lightly slide his finger over the most sensitive point, and then start over again.

“Jesus...” She panted, tilting her face toward his chest again, her own chest rapidly rising and falling against him. He was barely touching her, but it seemed to be stimulating every nerve ending in her body.

Rafael lifted her chin so she’d look at him again, focusing his light touches on her clit more and more with each pass.

“Fuck.” Katherine groaned. Her eyes no longer focused on his as her toes curled and body began to buck away from him. Rafael continued his light torment, his leg still pinning hers in place, smiling when she let him go, using that hand instead to grip his shoulder and buried her face in his chest again.

“Ok. Ok...” She panted when she didn’t think she could bare the touch any longer.

Slowly he slid his arm out from under her and wrapped it around her waist, holding her as she caught her breath.

“You should take personal days more often.” Katherine said, moving to straddle him once her breathing became less labored.

“I should?” He smirked.

“Yes, you should.” She smiled, lowering herself onto him.

“I might never go to work again if this is how all my mornings could go.” Rafael hummed, his hands gripping her ass as she rode him.

Katherine smiled and continued to move on him. Her hands pressed against his chest, her eyes not on the view from his bedroom, but scanning his chest, his lips, his eyes. He thrust to meet her grinding deeper with each downward motion she made. Both pulling apart and pushing together, the intensity building inside her, begging to be released.

“Ir adelante cariño. (Go ahead, honey.)” Rafael hummed as he watched her head tilt back and felt her muscles tighten.

It hadn’t been in English and Katherine had no idea what he had said aside from the term of endearment she had picked up over the years, but the soft hum of his voice had been enough to send of over the edge.

Rafael flipped her beneath him and proceeded to push through her orgasm. “Dios mío, te sientes increíble. (My god, you feel incredible.)” He grunted into her neck as he came, holding himself deep inside her, his hand gripped firmly in her hair.

“The Spanish, is it going to be a regular thing?” Katherine chuckled once she felt him relax against her.

“Unless you don’t like it.” Rafael said against her neck.

“Oh... I like it.” She stated, grinning when he pulled up to look at her.

“Lets take that shower I’ve wanted since the first morning I woke up next to you.” He smiled.

“I’m pretty sure I was already up when you woke up.” She teased.

“You know what I mean.” He smirked.

 

Katherine swiped her badge gaining them access to her school, and guided Rafael through the office area you had to pass from the main entrance.

“Hi Sally.” Katherine smiled as they reached her principal’s administrative assistant.

“Back again?” Sally smiled, glancing passed her to Rafael.

“I am, but just to grab a few things. Can I get the key to the science lab?”

“He here just to help?” Sally smiled, handing her the key.

Katherine shook her head knowing Sally was fishing for an introduction. “Sally this is my boyfriend, Rafael Barba. Rafael, this is Sally Hernandez.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” Rafael said.

“Like wise.” Sally grinned.

Katherine rolled her eyes and dragged Rafael behind her to her classroom.

“Why does she find it amusing that you’ve brought me here.” He asked as they climbed the stairs.

“Because all last year they kept trying to set me up with random guys and I kept telling them I wasn’t interested in dating anyone at the moment.”

“You weren’t?”

“Not really, especially not a blind date.” She said as she unlocked her door.

Rafael smiled and followed her into her classroom. “You’re room is almost set up.” He stated sounding a bit surprised.

“Yeah, I’ve been up here working most of this week and last because I wanted access to the copier and workroom to prepare for the seminar next week. I couldn’t remember where I packed last years journals when I was getting my room ready for summer cleaning, so I ended up setting my room up as I searched for them.” She shrugged.

“Journals?”

Katherine grabbed the composition notebook she had used for the science journal she created with her students the prior year and handed it to him. He flipped through it while she pulled an empty storage bin from above the student lockers and started placing the materials she needed inside.

“This is what you’re teaching next week?” He asked handing it back to her.

“It is.” She smiled, dropping it and a blank notebook in the bin and finished gathering the items she wanted.

Rafael started to carry the bin out for her, but she stopped him and unfolded a lightweight dolly. “How do you think I’m going to get it to the seminar next week?” She smiled.

“You can use my car service if you don’t want to lug this on the subway.” He smirked.

“Really?”

“I’ll give you my access to the app. As long as you give them thirty minutes they’re pretty punctual and you can schedule your morning pick up the night before.”

“Are you sure?” Katherine asked.

“Positive.” He smiled.

“Ok, I will at least going Monday and leaving Friday. I can leave my stuff there during the week.”

“So what else did you have planned for today?”

Katherine smiled and bit her lip but didn’t say anything.

“What?” He pressed, even though he was afraid he wasn’t going to like her answer.

“I had planned on checking out Coney Island.”

“You can’t be serious?” Rafael said rolling his eyes.

“I am though. I can show you all the tabs open on my laptop from where I was figuring out what I wanted to do once I got there.” Katherine grinned.

“I thought you were going to work in your room today.”

“Nope. I just planned to pick this stuff up so that I’d have it for next week. I’m done until Monday.” She smiled.

“You really want to go to Coney Island?” He sighed.

“I do.”

“It’s going to be crowded.”

“I can take my parents with me when they visit and we can do something quieter if you’d prefer.” She offered.

“No, we can go, just don’t expect me to ride anything.” He smirked, taking her hand and rolling the bin behind him as they left.

 

Rafael audibly groaned when he saw the amount of people on the boardwalk.

“It isn’t that bad. Just pretend there’s no one else here.” Katherine smiled.

“That would be easier to do if there weren’t actually other people here.” He grumbled.

Katherine chuckled and dragged him behind her as she searched for a spot to take a picture from, wanting to get a few of the boardwalk and rides and the boardwalk and beach.

“I still can’t believe you brought your camera.”

“I enjoy taking pictures.” She shrugged.

They had spent the better part of the afternoon walking around hitting up both the Coney Island Museum and the New York Aquarium, the latter of which prompting a conversation over which were cuter, sea lions, penguins, or sea otters. The discussion happening because Katherine became giddy with all three and Rafael thought it would fun to make her pick a favorite.

“I know you said you wouldn’t ride anything but does that include go karts?” Katherine grinned as they approached the track.

Rafael hesitated a moment, watching them zip passed them. “We’d have to figure out tickets or whatever their system is...”

“So?”

“You end up getting stuck buying more than you need and...”

“Oh my god.” She grinned, interrupting him.

“What?” He huffed.

“You really can’t drive.”

“I’ve driven.”

“Legally?”

He pushed up his bottom lip and huffed, but didn’t respond.

“I’m finding a ticket booth.” Katherine grinned even larger, setting out in search of one before he could argue.

“This is silly.” He muttered as they waited in line for the go karts.

“Why, because you’re competitive and I have an advantage?” She smirked.

“I can’t believe you spent that much on credits.” Rafael grumbled, not answering her question.

“It was the smallest increment they sold them in.”

“I would have paid.”

“You already paid for the aquarium, the museum, and lunch. This was my idea.” Katherine countered.

She smiled as he muttered under his breath, but let it go.

Rafael had little issue maneuvering the go kart, but Katherine still laughed when she lapped him, chiding him for being slow.

“I want a rematch.” He stated as they climbed out of their go karts.

“You do realize we’ll have to wait in line again?” She smirked.

“Yes, but you still have a ton of credits and I was just getting the hang of it.”

“Ok, but you still wont win.” Katherine chuckled.

And while Rafael made better time he still didn’t get close to passing her, though he was happy she didn’t manage to lap him this time.

“You know if we had gone again, based on my learning curve, I probably would have beat you.” He smiled after they were further from the go karts.

“We can find out if you want.” Katherine teased, turning them back the direction they had come from.

“Or we could ride that.” He smirked pointing at a roller coaster.

“I thought you didn’t want to ride anything?”

Rafael grinned at her impishly and shrugged.

“You’re actually having fun.” Katherine chuckled as they made their way to get in line.

“And if you tell anyone I’ll deny it.” He tried to say without smiling, but failed miserably.

A few rides and ice cream cone later they were sitting on a bench, riding the carousel. Katherine’s hand in his as she leaned against him.

“What are you doing?” Rafael asked when she lifted her camera up to take a picture of them.

“We don’t have any pictures together.” She smiled.

Rafael humored her and let her take a few, looking over her shoulder as she scrolled through them on the back of the camera. The shot’s turned out rather neat between the orangish lights of the carousel and the setting sun. She had held the camera steady and the two of them and any fixed point on the carousel were sharp but the horses that moved vertically and anything beyond the carousel were a blur.

“Can you get me a print of this?” He asked pointing to one they both looked good in.

“I can. Where are you going to put it?”

“Somewhere in my apartment, either my bedroom or office. I haven’t decided yet.” He said, pulling her closer.

 

Rafael’s Monday had started off at a hectic pace, but was slowly winding down a bit as lunch approached.

“Is that everything?” Rafael asked.

Liv and Amanda were in his office going over details of the case SVU was working, but they had exhausted all ways in which he could help and he had planned to bring Katherine lunch during her break at the near by high school where her seminar was conveniently being held.

“I think that’s it.” Amanda sighed, not hiding her annoyance that their case was falling apart.

“Is that a new picture?” Liv asked, glancing at the frame on his desk she hadn’t noticed before, though the picture itself wasn’t visible to her from where she stood.

“Is that Kate.” Amanda grinned.

“Kate?” Liv questioned, quirking her brow.

“Katherine.” Rafael smiled, handing Liv the framed photo Katherine had taken in his apartment.

“You’re in a relationship?” Liv asked, sounding a bit surprised.

“No, I just thought I’d randomly place a picture of Rollins’ friend on my desk.” Rafael deadpanned.

Liv gave him a rather unamused look at his sarcastic comment and handed back the photo. “You just hadn’t mentioned anything.” She smirked.

“It hadn’t come up.” He smiled, staring at the photo of Katherine a little longer than was necessary, the corners of his mouth never quite relaxing as he set it back in place on his desk.

“You seem happy.” Liv smiled.

“I would hope so, they spend enough time together.” Amanda muttered.

Liv turned to Amanda, narrowing her eyes disapprovingly, while Rafael more or less ignored her comment.

“When did you start dating?” Liv asked.

“Almost two months ago when she joined us for drinks, but honestly I haven’t been able to stop thinking about her since she kissed me outside the bullpen over a year ago.” He said, speaking to Liv as a friend, more or less forgetting Amanda was there.

“She did what?” Amanda blurted.

“Did she not tell you?” Rafael asked.

“No. I mean she asked about you... a lot, but she left that little detail out.” Amanda huffed.

“Maybe she knew you’d take it so well.” He smirked.

“It seems to have worked out.” Liv chuckled.

 

When he approached the classroom Katherine had told him she’d be in, he could hear her voice before he reached the door.

“Yeah, no. I’m fortunate that the school I’m at has a science lab and haven’t had to spend too much on lab materials, just a few things here and there. When I have had to purchase, I’ve hit up dollar stores, also you’d be surprised what you can find at a hardware store without spending a bunch of cash.” Katherine said to the small group still lingering in the classroom as Rafael entered.

All eyes turned to him and the box he was carrying containing the pizza he had picked up for their lunch. “We’ll let you get to your lunch” One of the women about Katherine’s age smiled.

“I’ll be around if you have more questions.” Katherine smiled as the group started to disperse.

Rafael made his way to Katherine, ignoring the woman closer to his age who blatantly checked him out as he passed. Katherine grabbed a couple Clorox wipes and wiped down a grouping of desks close to the front of the room, giving them a place to eat.

“How long is you’re break?” Rafael asked.

“An hour and a half, but between the stranglers and wanting to be back in time to set up for the next group I didn’t think there’d be time to actually go somewhere.”

“I don’t mind eating with you here.” He smiled.

“How long do you have?” Katherine asked, opening the box and grabbing a slice.

“Unless someone calls, I’m not in a rush.”

“Easy day then?” She smirked.

Rafael huffed out a short laugh. “How’s you’re day been?”

“Great actually. That was my first group, but they seemed to be happy they chose my workshop to attend.” She smiled.

“Going well then.”

“I’ve made a few notes to change for my afternoon group, but honestly I do that when I teach too. The last group always gets the best lesson.”

“I may have accidentally outed that kiss from last year to Rollins.” Rafael said, wanting to tell her before Amanda mentioned it.

Katherine laughed. “Why were you accidentally talking about it?”

“Liv asked about the picture I have of you on my desk and apparently I said more than I should have with Rollins in the room.”

“You have a picture of me on your desk?” She grinned.

“The one you took in my apartment a couple weeks ago.” He shrugged.

“When did you decide to print it out for your desk?”

Rafael turned slightly pink. “The day you texted it to me.”

Katherine covered her mouth to hide her smile, not that it hid the crinkles around her eyes.

“What?” Rafael huffed.

“It’s just nice to know you like me as much as I like you.” Katherine smiled.

“What do you have planned for you’re parents visit?” He asked, hoping to change the subject from her picture.

“My dad loves museums, so we’ll definitely hit up a few of those during the day. My mom has a list of broadway shows she wants to see, so a few of my nights will be occupied”

“You can always come over after.” He smirked.

“I could.” She smiled.

“I could join you as well, after our initial dinner with your parents if my work allows.” He offered.

“You’re sweet but why don’t you meet my mom before you commit to more time with her than you have to.” Katherine chuckled.

“I’d sit through an evening of Carisi giving me legal advice as long as you were there.” It was Katherine that blushed this time, having heard him complain about Carisi’s unsolicited input on cases multiple times over the last month.

“Ok, they get in Sunday, do you want to plan to do dinner Monday?” She asked.

“I’ll make a reservation.” He smiled.

“Ok.”

“If you want to get me the list of shows your mom wants to see I can get the tickets.” Rafael offered.

“You don’t have to do that.” Katherine smiled.

“I’m an ADA, it comes with some perks. I’m given better seats than you could buy yourself this close to the performance.”

“God, my mom’s going to love you.” Katherine chuckled.

 


	9. Chapter 9

 

Katherine walked into the overly crowded restaurant, glancing passed the hostess to see an annoyed looking Amanda staring back at her.

“You kissed Barba a year ago?” Amanda snapped as she sat down.

“Have you been stewing on that all week?” Katherine chuckled. It was Friday and the first time their schedules had allowed them to get together since Rafael had outed the details of their first kiss.

“I can’t believe you kissed him after I specifically told you not to rebound with him.” Amanda grumbled.

“I didn’t do it after. I kissed him impulsively when he was trying to make me feel better about my failed marriage. It was probably less than five minutes after I had gotten off the phone with Scott.” Katherine said, smiling at the memory.

“You’re smiling. I’ve never seen you smile while talking about that call with Scott.”

“I’m not smiling about the call.” Katherine grinned.

Amanda rolled her eyes and picked up her menu.

“It was a great kiss.” Katherine added.

“So great you weren’t going to tell me about it?” Amanda huffed.

“I would have eventually.”

“What did Barba say after you kissed him?”

“Ok, maybe a little crazy.” Katherine chuckled.

“I think I’m going to need more context to follow.” Amanda said, rolling her eyes again.

“Never mind.” Katherine chuckled again. “Basically, I apologized almost immediately afterward and he told me there were worse things than being randomly kissed my a beautiful woman. Then I mentioned getting back to you and he tried to hide how amused he was. We exchanged names, he made a joke about it being nice to know the name of someone whose tongue’s been in your mouth, and then told me he’d ask me out, but didn’t think I was quite ready. I was going back to Atlanta at the time and told him as much. That was it.” Katherine shrugged.

Amanda closed her eyes and exhaled a puff of air. “You’re tongue was in his mouth?”

“It’s not like he didn’t reciprocate.”

“You know what? I don’t want to know.” Amanda stated, holding a hand up as if to stop the conversation.

“It’s a very talented tongue.” Katherine smirked.

Amanda glared at her, clearly not amused by her last comment.

“I’ll stop.” Katherine smiled.

“You’re parents are coming next week?” Amanda asked.

“Their flight gets in at three on Sunday.” Katherine sighed.

“Are they meeting Barba?” Amanda smirked.

“We have dinner reservations for Monday evening.”

“Don’t looks so glum, your mom is going to love him.” Amanda assured her.

Katherine exhaled before speaking. “Yes, but not for the right reasons. She’s going to love that he got us into Carbone, great seats for the shows she wants to see, and I can only imaging what she’d say if they see his apartment... Those aren’t the things I love about him.”

“Love? ...about him.” Amanda said, lifting her brows.

“Like, whatever... we were talking about my mom loving him. Forgive me for using the same word.” Katherine protested.

“Uh huh...” Amanda smiled, “and what do you _like_ about him?”

The corners of Katherine’s lips twitched upward as she thought. “That he’s patient when Scott comes up and doesn’t push for information about my marriage, just leaves it in the past where it belongs. That he’s kind and considerate of me. He can be really cute when he’s grumped about something. And he has this fun playful side... he makes me laugh all the time. He’s smart, but you know that. Then there’s the way he looks at me, like I’m the only one he would ever want to look at...” Katherine paused for a moment, not even noticing the smile that had formed. “It doesn’t hurt that he’s extremely attractive... and my god does he look good in a suit. The sex is amazing, and I have realized that that is important to me, but it’s mostly the other stuff.”

Amanda was looking at her like she was possessed. “Jesus...”

“What?” Katherine huffed.

“You will invite me to the wedding?” Amanda quipped.

“Shut up, it’s been two months.” Katherine muttered.

“Yeah, but you didn’t see how he looked at that photo of you or his face when he mentioned not being able to stop thinking about that kiss from a year ago... Not to mention how gooey you looked just now.” Amanda smirked.

“He said he couldn’t stop thinking about that kiss?”

“Actually, I think he said he couldn’t stop thinking about you after the kiss.” Amanda clarified, resisting the urge to roll her eyes as Katherine smiled again.

 

Rafael’s chest pressed against hers, their lips crashing together, his hands roaming her sides, chest, gripping her neck and cheek. They had left his apartment that morning for a late breakfast, but somehow ended up back in his bed.

“What time is it?” Katherine asked, pulling away from his lips and lifting her head to peak at his clock. His fingers lightly grazed down her torso, slipping between her thighs.

“Rafael!” She scolded causing him to smile at her.

“What time is it?” He smirked.

“One thirty.”

“That’s plenty of time.” He said between the kisses he was trailing down the path his fingers had just taken.

“No, it’s not.” She sighed, pushing her fingers into his hair and gently tugging so he’d stop. “I’m taking the train to LaGuardia and that’ll take at least forty five minutes.”

Rafael sat up, grabbed his phone off his nightstand and typed something. “No you’re not.” He smiled, setting the phone back down and resumed his kisses.

“I told them I’d meet them at the airport.” She said, her voice breathy as his mouth hovered above her center.

“And my car service will pick you up at two thirty, giving us plenty of time.” He smiled, softly tonguing her before she could argue.

 

Katherine had little issue finding the baggage carousel her parents were waiting by, luggage in hand.

“Katie, sweetheart, you look great.” Natalie smiled when her daughter approached them.

“Hi mom, dad.” She said, giving them each a hug.

“You look happier than I remember you looking in Atlanta.” William, her dad, smiled.

“I am happy,” Katherine replied, “do you have everything?”

“We do. Do you know where we grab a cab or should I ask someone?” William asked.

“Rafael is letting us use his car service.”

“Oooh, Rafael’s car service.” Natalie grinned, ignoring her daughters eye roll.

“When do we get to meet Rafael?” Natalie asked once they were settled in the back seat.

“Dinner tomorrow night.”

“Did you make a reservation somewhere? I know you never think about those things, but it really makes a difference.” Natalie smiled.

“That makes absolutely no sense. I mean I get if the restaurant is busy and you want to guarantee a table, but how does calling ahead ‘make a difference’?” Katherine asked imitating her mothers haughty tone.

“It just does...” Her mother sighed.

Katherine chuckled when her dad rolled his eyes. “Rafael made reservations at Carbone for seven.”

“I read about that place while researching our trip and tried to get a reservation, but they said you had to book at least a month in advance for lunch, dinner was an even longer wait.” Natalie said, perking up slightly. “Are you sure you heard him correctly?”

“Pretty sure.” Katherine smiled.

“Even if it’s not the place you’re thinking of, you’ll be happy.” William said, subtly reminding his wife to behave.

“And I’ll be even happier if it is.” Natalie smiled.

 

Katherine had spent the morning with her parents visiting museums. Then grabbing a quick lunch before walking through Central Park.

“You’re not wearing that to dinner are you?” Natalie asked, gesturing to the jeans and shirt Katherine had worn as they made their way back to the hotel so her parents could change.

“It’s only four thirty mom. I thought we’d stop by the hotel and then I’d take you to my place so you could see it and I could change.” Katherine replied.

“I would like to make sure your building seems safe.” William smiled.

“There’s a detective living just a few floors below me. I even have her number.” Katherine smiled.

“How is Amanda? Will we get to see her?” Natalie asked.

“She said she’d tried to do lunch before you left.”

Once they were at her place Katherine showed them around, not that it took long.

“The built ins are a nice touch.” William said as he looked around.

“They look nice too. Usually they’ve been over painted or are on a wall you’d like to put furniture. These were well thought out.” Katherine smiled.

“It’s small.” Natalie said as Katherine guided them back into the living room so she could change.

“And expensive.” Katherine smirked, shutting the door to her bedroom with them on the other side allowing her to take a breath. She slipped on a sleeveless burgundy dress with a V neck, empire waist, and flowing A line skirt, brushed through her hair that she had styled straight that morning and added a bit of dry shampoo to give it some volume and texture back. She then touched up her makeup and slipped on a pair of nude pumps.

Natalie smiled when Katherine joined them in the living room. “Now that’s much better. I think you’re thinner than you were in college”

“Are you ready?” Katherine asked, ignoring her mother and switching her wallet to the the black purse she used anytime she dressed up.

“Cab should be here in five minutes.” William replied.

“Are you dieting?” Natalie asked.

“No mom, I’m just happy and more active than I was in Atlanta.” Katherine replied, refraining from saying what she really wanted to say. That she wasn’t stress eating anymore or eating to fill a void left by her inattentive ex husband. She knew her mother too well to think anything good would come from telling her that.

 

Katherine smiled when she saw Rafael walking up the sidewalk as they climbed out of the cab.

“Nice timing.” She smiled once he reached them, wrapping her arm around his waist as he gave her a quick kiss.

“You look pretty.” Rafael smiled.

“Mom, dad, this is my boyfriend, Rafael Barba. Rafael these are my parents, Natalie and William Morgan.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” Rafael said, extending his hand to shake her dads.

“You too.” William replied.

“Yes, it’s nice to finally meet you.” Natalie smiled, shaking his hand when he moved to her.

“Morgan’s your maiden name?” Rafael whispered, taking Katherine’s hand as he led them into the restaurant.

“It is.” She smiled.

Dinner was going nicely. Round three of drinks were under way, the appetizer finished and main meals started. Her parents were getting to know Rafael a bit and everyone seemed to be having a good time. Katherine had finally relaxed a bit when her mother brought up Scott.

“I wish you had known him when you were divorcing Scott. You probably could have gotten more out of him.” Natalie chuckled.

“Mom...” Katherine huffed quietly, hoping her mother would move on to a different topic.

“I’m not that kind of lawyer.” Rafael smiled.

“Still, she didn’t hirer one at all.” Natalie grumbled.

“You didn’t?” Rafael asked before he could stop himself.

“Mom.” Katherine said a bit more forcefully this time.

“You got screwed in the divorce.” Natalie huffed.

“No I didn’t.” Katherine exhaled.

“He makes three times what you make, you lived a good life, you could have gotten alimony. Maybe then you could afford more than that closet you live in.”

“I don’t want his money.” Katherine hissed.

“Fine, but you didn’t even get the house or...”

“Really mom? We’ve been together all day and you wait until now to bring this up?” Katherine interrupted.

“I’m just saying, seven years with the man, he cheats on you, and you get nothing. You could have at least got half of what the house was worth out him.” Her mother muttered.

“I just wanted out and I didn’t know he had cheated on me at the time, not that that would have changed anything. I don’t care about the house, whatever other possessions you think we should have divvied up, or what I should have been monetarily compensated for. I didn’t want anything from him.” Katherine snapped at her mother as quietly as she could.

“You don’t have to be rude.” Natalie huffed.

Katherine took a deep breath, pushing her hands in her lap as she steadied herself. Rafael reached his hand in her lap, reassuringly taking her hand in his. She glanced up at him, smiling apologetically, but he gave her a small smile letting her know not to worry about it.

“How long is your vacation?” Rafael asked her father, trying to move the conversation on.

“Two weeks, but I like to spend a little time at home relaxing before heading back to work so we decided to come to New York the first week.” William smiled.

“What do you both do?” Rafael asked, taking a sip of his scotch with the hand not holding Katherines.

“William is the Vice President of a bank.” Natalie smiled, rubbing her husbands arm.

“And you?” Rafael pressed.

“I taught until Katherine was born.”

“That’s nice that you got to stay home with her.” Rafael smiled.

“For who?” Katherine muttered softly so that only Rafael heard her, causing him to stifle a chuckle.

“Do you want kids?” Natalie asked.

“Don’t answer that.” Katherine interjected.

“You’ve always wanted kids, it’s something you should know earlier rather than later don’t you think?” Natalie more stated than asked.

“No.” Katherine stated.

“Why not?”

“Because it’s not a deal breaker. I’m not rushing into anything and I’m thirty four, who knows if I’ll even be able to have kids by the time I’m ready to take that step.” Katherine sighed.

“Women are having kids well into their forties these days.” Her mother countered.

Katherine rolled her eyes. “Then I have plenty of time, but this is a conversation for me and Rafael to preferably have when it’s just the two of us.”

“Fine.” Her mother conceded.

 

“Well that was fun.” Katherine grumbled as they rode back to his apartment after dropping her parents off at their hotel.

Rafael wrapped his arm around her so that she’d lean against him. “You’re father’s very quiet.”

“My mother dominates the conversation.” Katherine sighed.

“I noticed.” He smirked.

“I’m sorry...”

“For what?” Rafael asked opening the car door for her.

“Just the topics she brought up... They were inappropriate. She likes to act proper but lacks tact.” Katherine huffed.

Rafael smiled and took her hand, not saying anything as they went up the elevator and down the hall. Once inside he pulled her closer and kissed her quickly before resting his forehead against hers. “First of all, I know you’re divorced, if your mother brings it up it’s not going to bother me. I may not contribute to the conversation, but only because I feel it’s not my place. Second, I’ve never been opposed to the idea of kids, my work has just always taken priority over most everything in my life. If they happen one day, great, if not, I’m ok with that too.”

“So, not a deal breaker for you either?” She smirked as she looked at him.

“I’m afraid there are very few deal breakers when it comes to you.” Rafael smiled.

“You barely know me.” Katherine chuckled.

Rafael kissed her again while guiding her towards his bedroom, her fingers loosening his tie and dropping it to the floor, his suit jacket dropping next, then the vest, her fingers working their way down the buttons of his shirt.

“It doesn’t feel that way.” He exhaled when her eyes met his as she unfastened his slacks.

“For me either.” Katherine breathed, pushing herself closer to him and pressing her lips to his again as he reached for the zipper on her dress.

Rafael moved her to his bed, his skin against hers, his lips hovering painstakingly close to hers but not touching. His eyes embraced hers and as much as she wanted to look away, to break the contact that made her feel as though he could see passed the strong persona she often felt like she faked to neurotic woman she feared was all that was left, she didn’t. She held his gaze, running her hand through his hair until his lips finally found hers again.

 


	10. Chapter 10

 

Katherine turned to find Rafael still sleeping next to her. At first, she thought she had woke up earlier than she had wanted, but a quick glance at her clock told her Rafael was late for work.

“Raf.” She said softly as she nudged him, trying to gently pull him from his sleep.

“Uh hum...” He muttered, not bothering to open his eyes.

“Raf, wake up, it’s nine thirty.” Katherine nudged again.

Rafael rolled over so she couldn’t see him smiling. “Ok.” He replied, still sounding mostly asleep and not moving as though he were even trying to wake himself up.

“You’re late for work.” She stated, a little louder this time.

“No I’m not.” He mumbled, though he sounded like he was trying not to laugh.

“You’re not?” Katherine asked.

“I enjoyed the last personal day so much, I thought I’d take another.” Rafael turned to face her and smiled.

“You could have told me last night.” Katherine grumbled.

Rafael pulled her back to his arms, effectively pinning her beneath him. “But then I would have missed how sweetly your tried to wake me up.”

“Uh huh, well you’re up now and I need coffee and a shower.”

“I’m still kind of curious if we’d both fit in your shower.” He smirked.

Katherine smiled and shook her head. “There wont be much room to move and the water pressure isn’t nearly as nice as yours.”

“I’ll manage.” He smiled, dragging her out of bed behind him.

Once the water warmed, Katherine stepped into the shower Rafael following not far behind.

“See, the walls are so close you can’t even turn.” Katherine pointed out as the water poured between them.

Rafael grinned and lightly ran a finger between her legs. “Plenty of room.”

Katherine rolled her eyes but spread her legs a little wider for him, wrapping her arms around his neck when he kissed her.

“Hold on to my neck, ok?” He breathed, moving both of his hands to the back of her thighs.

Katherine nodded, though she was still slightly caught off guard when he lifted her and lowered her onto him, her legs wrapping around his waist as he pinned her against the tile wall. Her hands gripped his shoulder and into his hair as he started to thrust.

“Fuck.” She groaned as gravity sank him further into her.

“Te hubiera dicho que ya te amo si no pensara que te asustaría. (I’d have told you I love you already if I didn’t think I’d scare you off.)” Rafael hummed against her ear, speaking fast enough that the te amo blended in with the rest of his statement, hopefully going unnoticed.

“Do you ever intend to tell me what you’re saying?” Katherine panted, her head leaned back against the wall, her wet hair clinging to both her and the tile.

“One day.” He grunted, thrusting faster into her.

“Fuck...” She breathed, her cheek mashed against his hair when her body jerked forward and arms gripped tighter on his neck. Katherine contracted around him, stimulating his own release, leaving them both panting, Rafael leaning against her and the wall, Katherine collapsed around his upper body, her head resting on his shoulder.

Carefully, he set her down so that she stood in front of him again.

“Now we just have to figure out how to actually shower.” She chuckled.

Rafael smiled and pulled her towards him so that she was fully in the stream of water, ensuring that her hair was thoroughly wet before grabbing shampoo to wash it.

“Your solution is to bathe each other.” Katherine laughed when he pulled her back under the water to rinse.

“It seems to be working.” He smiled.

“You’re going to smell fruity.”

“I’ll survive.” Rafael smirked, working his fingers through her hair to get the soap out.

 

“What time are you meeting up with your parents?” Both of them were standing in her kitchen with only towels wrapped around them, Rafael starting the coffee maker.

“We are meeting for lunch at one and then they want to go to the Empire State Building.”

“I don’t think I’ve been there since junior high.” Rafael noted.

“Are you sure you want to join us? My mom will be there.” Katherine sighed.

“I’ve been to two broadway shows with your parents since our initial dinner and your mother has been very pleasant.” Rafael smiled, handing her a cup of the coffee he’d just made.

“That’s because she’s respectful enough not to talk during the show.”

“There was an intermission.” He smirked.

Katherine rolled her eyes, but mainly because he was right. If her mother had wanted to embarrass her, the intermission would have given her plenty of time. It wasn’t that her mom did it on purpose really, she just didn’t always think before she spoke.

“If I promise not to listen to anything your mom says will you relax?”

“She can come off materialistic... no... she is materialistic. I try not to be.”

“I know.” Rafael smiled.

“It’s just she puts such a value on things that ultimately don’t matter. I mean Scott came off like the doting husband when we were around my parents, opening doors or carrying my luggage... things he’d never do if it were just the two of us and still all she saw was his house, the car, the country club membership...” Katherine sighed.

“I can’t really picture you in a country club?” He smirked, lifting a brow.

“Good, don’t... though maybe I should mention that my parents are members of the same club.” She rolled her eyes and took a sip of her coffee.

“You didn’t want some sort of revenge for him cheating on you?”

Katherine looked at Rafael, only to find soft eyes staring back at her. “I didn’t know he cheated at the time.”

“But you got tested, so you assumed. A good lawyer would have found out the truth. Gotten you what your mom thinks you deserved.”

“I’m not sure I wanted to know the truth...” Katherine sighed, her gaze moving to the ground. “At first the lifestyle we lived was nice. A pleasant change from always feeling broke between my bills and student loan payments. He paid that off the first year we were married, not wanting my debt to be our debt, then he never let me forget it. It was also nice to be able to pay for car repairs or other extraneous expenses without stressing where the money would come from, but Scott lorded money over me like I should be thankful he ever looked my way. Always reminding me of something he’d bought me or how I wouldn’t have half the things I did without him if I even remotely questioned his commitment. I mean it when I say I didn’t want anything from him. I left our marriage debt free and with savings, it’s more than I had going in. All I wanted was to find myself again and to do that without financial help from anyone.”

“I’ll stop prying.” Rafael said, gently cupping her cheek, grazing his thumb across her cheekbone.

“If you want to know something, I want to tell you. I just hate talking about Scott when I’m with you.”

“Then we wont.” He smiled.

“But if you want to know something...”

“I promise if I really need to know something I’ll ask, other than that I’ll just know the bits your mom thoughtlessly shares.”

“And for that, I’m taking this.” She smirked, stealing the towel from around his waist and heading to her room to get dressed.

“You do realize the only person who can see me is you and I’m pretty sure you know what I look like naked.” He teased, refilling his coffee cup before following her to the bedroom.

 

“Rafael, I’m so glad you could join us today.” Natalie smiled as they met up in their hotel lobby.

“I’m fairly caught up on work for a change so I thought I’d make it a three day weekend.” He smiled.

“Do you have suggestion for lunch? We’ve been looking online but can’t make our mind up.” Natalie sighed.

“We could go to Robert’s.” Rafael suggested.

“What kind of food is it?” William asked.

“A mix I guess, I think they list themselves as modern American. They also have a great view of Central Park and Columbus Circle.”

“Oh, that sounds nice.” Natalie smiled.

“Can we walk?” Katherine asked.

“It’s just a few blocks away.” Rafael smiled, taking her hand in his and leading the group to the restaurant.

 

“Is this where you took that picture?” Natalie asked while they waited for their food.

“What picture?” Rafael asked.

“The one she changed her Facebook profile picture a few weeks back.” Natalie replied.

Katherine chuckled. “I doubt Rafael is on Facebook.”

“You are?” He smirked.

“It’s a nice way to keep in touch with people.” She shrugged.

“Where’d you take it then?” Her mother asked.

“Wait the picture you took when I left you alone in my apartment?” Rafael asked, more concerned with figuring out what photo her mother was talking about than who was sitting at the table with them.

Katherine could see her mother smile before she even looked at her. “You could have just said that.” Natalie smiled.

“I could have...” Katherine lightly chuckled.

“Your apartment has a nice view.” Natalie smiled.

“It really does.” Rafael replied.

“Do you own?” William asked.

“I do. I rented a tiny little place in Brooklyn, not much larger than Katherines actually, up until I transferred to Manhattan two years ago. I had saved enough at that point to buy a place I could grow with in an area that I wanted to be in.”

“You’ve only lived there for two years?” Katherine asked.

“Yes, I knew what I eventually wanted, but never minded the close quarters. So I stayed in the same apartment I rented out of law school until I had enough to comfortably buy the place I ultimately wanted.” Rafael smiled.

 

“So the last time you were up here was middle school?” Katherine asked as they stole a moment to themselves when her parents ventured to take in another view.

“I think we called it junior high then.” He smirked.

“So did we, but I teach and we call it middle school now.”

“Have you made it up here before?” Rafael asked.

“Nope.”

“Well, in that case...” He smiled, taking her hand in his, dragging her to the edge to point out a few notable places within view.

“I’m glad I didn’t come here by myself.” Katherine grinned, slightly interrupting the visual tour he was giving her.

“You’re poking fun?”

“No. I’m enjoying my history lesson.”

“What? Would you rather me go Sleepless in Seattle on you and kiss you up here?” He teased.

“They actually don’t kiss.”

“Isn’t the whole movie about them finally meeting on the Empire State Building on Valentine’s Day?” He questioned, almost positive he was remembering the movie correctly, though if he were being honest with himself he had only been watching it to make out with the girl he had been dating at the time.

“Sort of, but they don’t kiss. They hold hands.” Katherine smiled.

“This is the thing girls swoon for?”

“I guess. I mean if I’m going to pick a nineties rom com it would be The Truth About Cats And Dogs and if I’m choosing between Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks films I’d go with You’ve Got Mail over Sleepless in Seattle, at least of ones they starred in together. When Harry Met Sally for Meg Ryan otherwise and A League of Their Own for Tom Hanks.”

“Really, A League of Their Own,” he smirked, “not Forrest Gump or Apollo 13... Big?”

“Maybe Big, but I can rewatch A League of Their Own over and over again, not so much Forrest Gump or Apollo 13.” Katherine chuckled, pushing up to kiss him.

 

“Today wasn’t so bad.” Rafael smiled from his bed when Katherine exited the bathroom.

“I suppose not.” Katherine climbed in bed, cuddling closer to him as he wrapped her n his arms.

“What time is their flight tomorrow?”

“Early.”

“Do you want to use the car service again?” He asked, hoping to get her back quickly so they could spend the day together.

“They’ve already arranged with the hotel to have a car take them.” Katherine said.

“So you don’t have to get up at all?”

“Nope.”

“And I can keep you up as late as I want.” Rafael smirked, his hand breaching the bottom of her fitted shirt.

“As long as you let me sleep in tomorrow.” Katherine smiled.


	11. Chapter 11

 

Rafael watched as Katherine tried on dress after dress, looking at herself in the mirror, sighing and then tossing the dress on her bed and slipping into a new one.

“Who’s your date with?” He teased.

Katherine rolled her eyes. “You know I do this every year... For over a decade I’ve faced parents and new students on meet the teacher night and I always get nervous.”

“New students make you nervous.” He chuckled.

“Not the students, the parents...I can never decide what to wear. I want a dress that is professional, but not necessarily teachery...”

“Wouldn’t want to look like a schoolmarm?” Rafael teased again.

Katherine glared at him and continued. “nothing revealing or kiddish... or geez, like I’m going out after... something age appropriate.”

“You’re overthinking this.”

“I know that.” She huffed, tugging the latest outfit off. “At my old school, we got together and started ordering school shirts to wear every year. It was great. We got to wear them with jeans, all the parents knew who the teachers were, and I didn’t spend the night before stressing over what to wear.”

“Maybe suggest it for next year.” He smirked, wrapping his arms around her bare stomach and kissing the back of her neck.

“That’s not helping...”

Rafael smiled and let her go, blocking her access to her closet as he search through what hadn’t made its way on her bed. Katherine stood behind him in only her bra and panties watching, part of her wanted to move him so she could finally settle on an outfit, another curious what he’d come up with.

“Try this.”

She took it from him, slipping the grey pencil skirt on first, leaving it unzipped as she pulled the light blue blouse on, tucking it into the skirt before zipping it up. The short sleeves would be cool when her room was filled with people, but they were still professional looking. The skirt was one of her longer ones, hitting a little below the knee, and while the outfit accented her figure, it wasn’t overly sexy.

“I kind of hate you.” Katherine smirked.

“Why because I can dress you better than you can?” He grinned.

Katherine rolled her eyes and slipped back out of the skirt and top, hanging them on her closet door for the next morning. She started to pick her jeans back up when Rafael slipped his arm around her again, kissing her shoulder.

“I have to put my clothes away.” She smiled, gesturing to the pile on her bed.

“I’ll help if you leave those off.” He smirked, putting a dress back on a hanger and handing to her.

Katherine rolled her eyes and smiled, setting the jeans back down and taking the dress from him.

“You know this might be my favorite look for you, after that button up shirt and panties anyway.” Rafael said, handing her the last dress.

“That’s all I’m wearing in that photo that’s on your desk.” She smirked, letting him keep his arms around her this time.

“I know.” He grinned.

Katherine turned in his arms, kissing him as he walked her to her bed, smacking his hands away when tried to slide her panties down.

“Mr. Barba,” she said, smiling when he rolled his eyes, “you are wearing entirely too much.”

“Am I?” He smirked.

“You are. I think we need to even things up a bit.” Katherine smiled, pressing her lips to his before he could respond, her fingers, not even bothering with the t-shirt he was wearing, instead going straight for his jeans.

She dropped to her knees, tugging the jeans down his legs, moving them out of the way as he stepped out of them.

“Better?” He spoke, lifting a brow when she looked up at him.

“Getting there.”

Katherine felt him over his boxer briefs, running her hand along his length, a smile tugging at her lips when his underwear started to tent. He was watching her, but her eyes were on his bulge as she moved the fabric, revealing him to her. Her hand wrapped around the bare skin, pumping a few times, her eyes meeting his as she licked the vein along his underside, taking the head in her mouth before their eyes broke contact as she took him deeper. Rafael rested his hand in her hair while she bobbed on him.

“Katherine...” He breathed, but it came out more as a throaty moan.

She smiled around him and continued, taking him further down her throat, gagging slightly when he gripped her hair, holding her still as he pushed deeper, keeping himself there for a moment before pulling out completely. Katherine gasp for air, only taking a second to catch her breath before taking him in again, allowing him to repeat his previous motion.

“Dios mío, Katherine. (My god, Katherine.)” Rafael panted, pulling her back to her feet and pressing his lips to hers.

The bra was the first to go, then the panties. Rafael tugged his own shirt off as Katherine pushed his underwear completely off, pulling him above her on the bed. He started to kiss down her chest when she pulled him back to her lips, guiding him between her legs, lifting to meet him as he pushed inside her.

“Jesus Raf...” She moaned as he thrust.

“I take the father, you take the son?”

“What?” Katherine panted, not understanding his question since she hadn’t paid attention to what he said in Spanish. Though she was probably too distracted to follow the quip, even if he had spoke in English.

“Never mind.” He smirked, picking up his pace when he noticed her eyes close and head tilt back.

“Fuck.” She groaned, buckling forward, pulling him closer as their lips met again and her body shuddered beneath him.

Rafael kept her close, but continued to thrust, stilling after a moment and collapsing onto her.

“I’m almost sad to go back to work and miss out on mid afternoon sex.” She smiled, running her fingers though the hair behind his ear.

“Yes, but I’ll probably get more work done.” He smirked.

“Whatever, you only skip out on work when you’re caught up.” Katherine chuckled.

“There’s always next summer.”

“True...”

“And Thanksgiving, and winter break... spring break...”

“Ok, I get your point.” She laughed, kissing him again.

“Come on, get dressed.” Rafael said, pulling her out of bed.

“You want me in clothes now?”

“No. I want to take you to dinner and I’m pretty sure you have to dress for that.”

 

Midway through her first week back in the classroom, Katherine realized how thankful she had been to share the weekend before with Rafael. So far she hadn’t left for home earlier than nine and hadn’t managed to do much more than crash when she got home. That’s the thing about taking three months off from your job, you feel like you’re just thrown back in when it starts up again. It doesn’t matter how much she preps for the beginning of the school year, the early mornings, twenty four small humans in constant need of monitoring and instruction, and prepping for the next day always drain her. A few weeks in and she’d adjust to the routine again.

“Dinner?” Rafael texted as she sat at her desk. She was going over the short assessments she had given her students that checked what big concepts they had retained in both math and science from the previous year. This data gave her a starting point to balance the grouping of her students early in the school year.She audibly sighed as she was only finished accumulating the data on her morning class, still had her afternoon group to work through, and then wanted to create cards for each concept, color coding each student by their proficiency to make changing her groups easier.

“This first week back is going to kill me. Can we plan for Saturday?”

Katherine set her phone down only for it buzz seconds later.

“I could bring dinner to you.”

She was half tempted to accept, but she really wanted to finish up and go home and it would take twice as long if she were distracted.

“How about I get my work done tonight and tomorrow and then I’ll force myself to leave at a decent hour and you can have me Friday and Saturday?”

“You might be worse than me.”

“Well, you did play hooky to go to an amusement park with me.”

“I really can’t convince you to eat?”

Katherine sighed, she really wanted to see him, but she also didn’t want to take work home this weekend.

“I really wish I could.”

“Ok. Text or call so I know you made it home safely.”

“I’ll call.”

She set her phone down and returned to her work, finally finishing the last of her cards at nine thirty. Katherine’s stomach growled as she slipped her bag over her shoulder and started her short walk home.

When she got home, she dropped the bag on her couch and glanced in her fridge. “Great... an apple.” She muttered, pulling it out of the crisper and noticing a block of cheddar. She grabbed that as well and checked her cabinet for crackers.

“Hey.” Rafael answered as soon as she sat at small table to eat.

“Hey.” Katherine smiled.

“You’re just now eating?” He asked when he heard her bite into the apple.

“I just got home.”

“What are you eating?”

Katherine shook her head at her sad little dinner. “Cheese and crackers and an apple.”

“How are your kids?” He asked ignoring the comment about her dinner that entered his mind.

“This group is chattier than last years, at least my afternoon class is... though the morning class could be chattier in the afternoon too, but I wouldn’t know because they’re across the hall.

“You like splitting the day like that and teaching two groups as opposed to just keeping the same kids all day?” Rafael asked.

“I like planning for two subjects. I can create better lessons when I can focus on two subjects instead of trying to teach everything. Math and science are my jam.”

“Your jam?” He chuckled.

“Sorry, I’m tired and have been talking to nine year olds all day.”

“Is this what you’re going to sound like now?”

“If you’re going to tease me I will hang out with Amanda on Friday.” Katherine grumbled.

“I’m done, I promise.”

“Uh huh...” She yawned.

“What time did you get to work?

“Six thirty.”

“I’ll let you sleep.”

“But I want to talk.” Katherine said, yawning again.

“As do I, but you sound like you could fall asleep on me at any moment.” Rafael replied.

Katherine hummed out a breath, “I could.”

“Go to bed then, I’ll still be here tomorrow.”

“Fine.” She smirked.

“Buenas noches cariño, dulces sueños.”

“You too.” She mumbled through a yawn.

“Do you even know what I said?” He chuckled.

“I teach at a dual language school, and while my class may be monolingual, I hear enough Spanish daily to pick up on goodnight and sweet dreams... that and my kids go to specials, one of which is Spanish, and we get a weekly word or phrase that gets added to my wall. Your little cariño in the middle is sweet.”

Rafael bit his lip as he smiled. “What is your word for this week?”

“I’ll let you know on Friday since that’s the day my class goes to Spanish.”

“I’m holding you to that.”

“Ok.”

“Goodnight Katherine.”

“No sweet dreams?” She teased.

“Sweet dreams.” He added, sounding amused.

“Buenas noches y dulces sueños.” Katherine said, smiling as he let out a throaty breath.

 

It was finally Friday, and Katherine was more than excited to see Rafael that evening. Her kids had been picked up and she just finishing making copies when her phone rang.

“Hey.” She smiled as she answered, ignoring the look from Karla, the teacher her students spent the other half of the day with.

“I’m here.” Rafael said, letting her know he was outside the school.

“You’re early,” Katherine chuckled, “give me a minute.”

“Whose early?” Karla smiled.

“My boyfriend.” Katherine shook her head when Karla smiled, gathered the copies she had just made, and headed towards the front doors to let Rafael in.

“You’re going to lose your spot in line.” She chuckled when Karla caught up with her halfway down the hall.

“Totally worth it,” Karla grinned, “what does he do?”

“He’s a prosecutor.”

“How’d you meet?”

“My friend, Amanda, works with him.”

“All those boring staff developments and teacher work days and you didn’t bother to mention you started dating someone?” Karla scolded.

“This,” Katherine chuckled, pointing between them as best she could with all she was carrying as Karla followed her down the hall, “this is why.”

Katherine used her back to open the door since her arms were full and Rafael took the door from her, following her into the building.

“Can I help?” He asked looking at the papers and books she had precariously stacked in her arms.

“I’m honestly afraid to move them until I get to my room.”

“Ahem...” Karla coughed, behind her.

Katherine smirked and shook her head. “This is Rafael Barba, Rafael this is Karla Winters. She teaches our kids ELAR and social studies when they aren’t with me.”

“Nice to meet you.” He said.

“You too.” Karla smiled.

“I’m not quite finished.” Katherine sighed.

“That’s fine.” Rafael smiled, following her back down the hall to the stairs.

“We have so much more to talk about.” Karla whispered as she passed on her way back to the workroom.

 

Katherine managed to set everything down without it toppling over, spreading the papers she had stacked in sets out so she could organize it for the following week.

“Your room looks lived in.” Rafael chuckled.

“Twenty four nine year olds will do that.” She smiled, moving to straighten a few areas of the room.

Rafael watched, wanting to help but not knowing where she wanted things. It didn’t take her long and soon she was back at her desk typing.

“I’m not that early.” He smirked and he really wasn’t, they had agreed on six thirty and it was just now six.

“I know, there’s just always one more thing to do... Let me move a few things around on my schedule for next week, then we can go.”

Rafael nodded and sat at one of her students desk, looking almost comical as he was larger than the desk was designed for and still in his suit. Katherine quickly adjusted her schedule for next week to account for what she hadn’t gotten to this week and some reteaching of routines and expectations, then printed it and set it prominently on her desk. This was her lifeline, without it she’d never stay on track and cover the concepts she needed to in the timeframe she had.

“Ok, I’m done... I think...” She said looking around her desk, double checking she had everything ready for Monday at least.

“Is that what you’re wearing?” Rafael teased.

“You better be over dressed for where we’re going, because today was a jeans day and I’m not changing.” Katherine chuckled.

“Burgers and fries it is then.”

“That actually sounds really good.”

“I was kidding, but if it’s what you want.” He smiled.

“Can we take it back to your place? I’m ready to just be where I’m going to be.” Katherine sighed.

“We can. You want to stop by your place to pack a bag?”

Katherine nodded, ignoring how tired she felt as she leaned against him when he pulled her closer to leave.

 

They were at his table, about halfway through dinner when Katherine rested her head on her hand for a moment, suddenly jerking back up when she fell asleep for a second.

“Tired?” Rafael smirked.

“Shut up.” She said, laughing at herself.

“What time did you leave yesterday?”

“Nine or so...”

“Katherine...”

“It’s just getting the routine down again. It’s not only the kids that have adjust to that every year... In a few weeks I’ll be used to the early mornings again and I’ll switch back to twelve hour days.” Katherine sighed.

“Twelve?”

“I get in at six thirty and even if I do get leave by four thirty it’s still a ten hour day... typically I leave around six, six thirty, maybe five thirty if I’m lucky.”

“What time does school start?” Rafael asked.

“Seven forty, and I dismiss kids at three twenty. Then I decompress for a bit, grade, plan for the next day or week, meet with my grade level at least one day a week, we have a staff meeting most Thursdays, and...”

“Ok,” he chuckled, interrupting her.

“It’s just the beginning of the year... I’m pretty sure I block this out until I relive it every year. Things will normalize soon.”

“Do you want to go to bed?”

“It’s only eight thirty?”

“Would you stay awake through a movie?”

“No.” She chuckled.

“It’s been a long week. Let’s go to bed and wake up rested tomorrow.”

“Are you sure?”

Rafael nodded and started picking up the trash from their dinner, rolling his eyes when Katherine helped.

Once in bed, Rafael pulled her closer, pressing his lips to hers.

“I thought we were sleeping.” Katherine breathed when his hand moved up her side toward her breast.

“We are.” He hummed, bringing his hand up and running it through her hair instead.

“That’s ok?”

Rafael gave her a curious look. “Yes.”

“We can tomorrow...” She yawned, cuddling closer.

“Go to sleep Katherine.”

“Ok...” She nodded against his chest, drifting off moments later.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’ve jumped a little time... not much, just a few months. I’m referencing episodes but not heavily just some that might carrying over into Katherine and Amanda’s relationship. This one references season 16 episode 8: Spousal Privilege.

 

“Have you been here long?” Amanda asked as she joined Katherine at the bar they had agreed to meet at thirty minutes ago.

“This is drink number two, and that,” Katherine gestured with her eyes to a man across the bar from them, “is the man who thinks you’re my girlfriend.”

“You couldn’t have just told him you weren’t interested.” Amanda chuckled.

“I tried that, but ten minutes later he decided I might have changed my mind, so I told him I wasn’t single which still didn’t seemed to deter him. Then I bluntly told him I was meeting my girlfriend and I had no interest in his penis.”

“That worked?”

“Seems to have.” Katherine shrugged.

Amanda glanced in the mans direction and rolled her eyes. “You do realize he’s just picturing himself with both of us now...”

“As long as the thoughts remain in his head and he leaves me alone I really don’t care.”

“How are things with Barba?”

“Rafael is great. Schools great. Everything’s...”

“Great?” Amanda chuckled.

“I can’t help it, I’m happy.” Katherine grinned.

“Are you going to Atlanta for Thanksgiving?”

“I only get Thursday and Friday off so I wouldn’t be able to make it for the holiday itself. I promised my mom I’d visit this Christmas instead and I only agreed to that because I haven’t been home at all since I moved.” Katherine shrugged, she wasn’t exactly happy about the idea of being in Atlanta again. Her mother hung out with a specific grouping of women and they could make the city feel extremely small at times. Especially since she knew her mother would want to do Christmas Eve dinner at the club and would be surprised if Scott wasn’t there.

“In other words she guilted you into it.”

Katherine nodded and took a drink of her martini.

“Take Barba.” Amanda suggested.

“You think I should take him home for Christmas?”

“Why not?”

“It’s only been six months.” Katherine stated.

“Please, that man would do anything you asked him to.” Amanda chuckled.

“I doubt that.”

“Ok... with in reason, but he’d spend Christmas with you. What are you doing for Thanksgiving?”

“Probably what I did last year, set up my tiny Christmas tree and watch the parade.” Katherine shrugged.

“He hasn’t asked you to spend it with him?”

“No. What are you doing?” This time last year Amanda had been going through her own issues and hadn’t been around much. It hadn’t really bothered Katherine as she knew Amanda had been seeing some guy and busy with work. Not to mention the holidays had made her feel more lonely than she would ever admit to anyone and she had mostly sulked in her apartment the year before. Her and Scotts relationship my not have been great, but the holidays had been one of the few times he acted the way he had when they first started dating... mainly because they were always around people.

_“Kate!” Scott called from the living room as she finished getting ready. “We’re going to be late.” Katherine slipped the back on her earring and carried a necklace out for Scott to fasten for her. “I’m ready once you clasps this for me.” She smiled, handing him the necklace. “Is this a new dress?” Scott asked as she lifted her hair out of the way. “No, I bought it last summer for Uncle Jerry’s funeral, but it’s a simple black dress and I didn’t see the point in only wearing it once. I thought it’d work for tonight.” Katherine adjusted her hair once he’d finished with the necklace and smoothed out the front of the dress. “You look nice in it.” Scott smiled. No, it hides the weight well... or I’m surprised it still fits you. Just a compliment. That rarely happened anymore... “Thanks.” Katherine said, returning his smile. “Are you ready,” he grinned, “if we get there early enough we can watch as everyone tries to avoid sitting next to Ken’s wife... what’s her name again?” “Emily... she’s not so bad.” Katherine chuckled. “And this is why my family loves you.” Scott smiled again, almost dragging her out the door behind him._

She almost hated remembering being happy with him more than when she remembered how much of an ass he could be. She hated the fact that she missed his family too... mostly that she couldn’t see them anymore. His mother and father had always been kind to her.

“I’m actually going to Atlanta, was kind of hoping you’d be stuck there too.” Amanda said.

“Will you be there over Christmas?”

“No. I took Christmas off last year, so I’m working it this year.”

“That sucks...” Katherine grumbled.

“Take Barba.” Amanda repeated.

“I’ll think about it.” Katherine smiled. “How are things with Nick?”

Amanda groaned and downed half her drink.

“That great huh?”

“We’re just disagreeing on the case we’re currently working.” Amanda shrugged.

“And you’re pushing buttons?” Katherine smiled.

“Maybe he’s pushing my buttons.” Amanda shot back.

“Could be, but I know you...”

“Which is kind of the point I’ve been trying to make.”

“Yeah... I’m going to need more than that.” Katherine said furrowing her brow.

“It’s just this case we’re working. A.J. Martin hit his wife, knocking her out, but the wife is claiming she started it. That she provoked the fight and that is something I can relate to.” Amanda shrugged, finishing off her drink and signaling for another.

“You push buttons, but not so far as you deserve to be hit.”

“I don’t know... I’m pretty sure Nick wanted to the other night.”

“To hit you?” Katherine blurted.

“He didn’t.” Amanda assured her. “He said he was doing what A.J.Martin should have done and walked away.”

“You purposely goaded him to see if he would hit you?”

“I was trying to prove a point.”

“And did you get Nick’s point?”

“I did... not that we’re talking except at work now.” Amanda said, taking a sip of the new drink she had just been served.

“You ok with that?”

“Eh... we were never really dating anyway, so...” Amanda shrugged.

“That’s not what I asked.”

“I’m fine.”

“Well if you decide you’re not, you know where to find me.”

“You can pry yourself away from Barba?” Amanda chuckled.

“For you I can.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Amanda smiled.

 

Katherine knocked on Rafael’s door the Friday before Thanksgiving. It seemed like before any holiday or scheduled time off her work load would increase, like there were suddenly twenty things added to her to do list and her students decided to forget every expectation they had previously been following exceptionally well.

“You look tired.” Rafael smirked.

“I am tired, but next week starts a small break and I plan on doing nothing work related until Sunday.” Katherine smiled, taking her bag with her things for in the morning to his room.

“That’s right it’s Thanksgiving... are you going home?” Rafael asked.

“No, we have school Monday through Wednesday so there’s really no point.”

“Are you hanging out with Rollins?”

“She’s actually going to Atlanta, which is kind of strange since she never really goes home, but I didn’t ask for details.” Katherine stated as she pulled the clothes she had packed out so they wouldn’t wrinkle.

“What are you doing then?”

“Setting up my Christmas tree and watching movies.” She shrugged.

“All alone?”

“Unless you want to keep me company.”

“Or you could join me and I help you decorate your tree after.” Rafael smiled.

“Where would I be joining you?”

“My mami’s.” He smirked.

Katherine hadn’t met his family yet and the idea of doing so made her a bit nervous, but he had been willing to meet hers and there was no way his mom could be worse than her mother.

“How many people will be there?” This was the real cause for her nerves... the possibility of meeting his whole family.

“Just Abuelita, mami, you, and me, if you’ll join me. They make entirely too much food so an extra person to feed will help in the amount of leftovers I’m forced home with.”

“You have a granny?” Katherine grinned.

“Careful or I’ll rescind my offer.” Rafael lifted a brow and Katherine smiled while cupping his cheek.

“I have a granny too... well had I guess. She passed when I was twenty two.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s been twelve years. I love her, miss her... but she was really sick and ready to move on.” Katherine shrugged.

“What do you think about Thanksgiving?”

“Sure, why not.”

“Just the enthusiasm I was going for.” He teased, chuckling when she smiled at him.

“If Thanksgiving goes well you can decide if you want to be my buffer for Christmas in Atlanta.”

“You’re going home for Christmas?”

“My mom has guilted me into it since I haven’t been home since I moved almost a year and a half ago now.” Katherine grumbled.

“Your buffer as opposed to your boyfriend?” He smirked.

“My mom loves you, I swear when she’s calls she asks about you more than me.”

“Have you bought your plane ticket yet?”

“No.”

“Give me the dates and I’ll have Carmen book the flights.”

“Flights? So you’re going.” Katherine asked, refusing to let herself smile until she had a clear answer from him.

“If the only way I get to see you is in Atlanta then what choice do I have?” Rafael smiled.

“You are so going to regret this, but I’m excited.” Katherine grinned as she wrapped her arms around him.

 

“My mami can be a bit intense...” They were on their way to his mothers apartment and Rafael had spent the majority of the ride trying to prepare her for what she’d agreed to.

“More intense than you?” She teased.

“The foods a little different than what you probably expect, but she did say she’d make a green bean casserole to have something traditional...” He either hadn’t noticed her tease or had ignored it.

“Rafael, I’ve never done a traditional Thanksgiving. My family has always gone out to eat. I’m pretty sure I’ve eaten salmon or lobster for the last couple decades on Thanksgiving. I have no expectation of tradition. Hell, the fact that they’re cooking is more traditional than I’ve ever had.”

Rafael seemed to relax a bit, but when he opened his mouth to speak again Katherine kissed him so he’d stop making her more nervous than she already was.

 

“Rafi, hi, hi, come in.” Lucia said pushing her son through the door so she could get a better look at the woman he had brought with him. “Hi, I’m Lucia Barba.”

“Katherine Morgan.” Katherine smiled, attempting to shake his mothers offered hand but was pulled into a hug instead.

“My Rafi talks about you a lot.” Lucia whispered in her ear.

“Don’t listen to a word she says.” Rafael grumbled when he realized his mother had said something he couldn’t hear.

“All good things Rafi.” Lucia smiled.

“Rafi?” Katherine chuckled quietly when she moved closer to him.

“For as long as I can remember.” He huffed.

“Oh...” Katherine grinned.

“Oh what?” He furrowed his brow as he watched Katherine move towards a far wall in the living room.

“It’s just hard to picture you as a child and yet here’s evidence.” There were multiple family portraits taken when Rafael was around six or seven up until his sullen teen years.

“Let’s introduce you to my Abuelita, shall we.” He smirked, starting to guide her away from the photos.

“As long as you realize I will remember where these are.” Katherine chuckled.

 

“Abuelita, hola.” Rafael said giving his grandmother a kiss on the cheek.

“Mi juez, tu nunca lo visitas. (My judge, you never visit.)” Catalina scolded.

“Lo siento, he estado preocupado. (Sorry, I’ve been preoccupied.)” He smirked. “This is Katherine. Katherine, this is my Abuelita, Catalina Diaz.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” Katherine smiled.

“You too dear. It’s nice to see him happy... when I get to actually see him.” Catalina replied.

“I see you plenty.” Rafael chuckled, rolling his eyes at his grandmothers on going attempts to guilt him into more visits.

“So Rafael says you’re a teacher?” Lucia asked while working on food in the kitchen.

“Fourth grade.” Katherine smiled.

“That is a good year.” Lucia smiled.

“It’s my favorite. They’re independent enough they don’t need you to tie their shoes for them, but they’re still sweet. Every year I watch my sweet little fourth graders from the year before turn into hormonal middle schoolers once they reach the end of fifth grade and I’m thankful for my current batch of fourth graders.” Katherine chuckled.

“Even though they’re still third graders when you get them?” Lucia grinned.

“Needy I can handle, watching them be mean to each other, simply because they’re at the phase of pushing boundaries... I hate watching that. Of course I say that, but if I witness it in the hall I do find some enjoyment in watching them sulk out an apology to each other simple because I accused them of not behaving like the kids I raised the year before. That wouldn’t be as effective if I were their current teacher though.”

“Raised?” Rafael smirked.

“For the year I have them they are my kids.” Katherine smiled.

“Do you have children of your own?” Lucia asked.

“Mami...” Rafael scolded.

“What you said she was divorced, it’s not like it’s a crazy question...”

“No, I don’t have kids” Katherine stated.

“I’m sorry if I overstepped.” Lucia said, noticing the topic seemed dampen Katherines spirit a bit.

“It’s fine. I just sometimes feel like I wasted the opportunity to have children being married to the wrong man.” Katherine shrugged.

“It happens dear, we all fall for someone who is no good for us at some point.” Catalina smiled, squeezing her shoulder slightly.

“But do we all marry him...” Katherine sighed.

“Usually.” Lucia and Catalina both said causing the two women to chuckle.

“Just be thankful you left, otherwise you’d be burying a man while you and your son rack your brain trying to think of a single nice thing to say about him.” Lucia added.

Katherine glanced at Rafael who bit his lip and half smirked back at her. She had remembered briefly talking to him about how Scott had treated her and him making a statement referencing men like that and then mentioned his father, but it was somehow different listening to Lucia reference it. And the way his grandmother spoke made her think she hadn’t had the greatest of marriages either.

 

The conversation moved onto lighter topics... mostly school and shared complaints within the educational system between Katherine and Lucia. The food had been good, the turkey was definitely seasoned differently than Katherine had expected, but she enjoyed it more than a traditional turkey which she typically found to be a bit dry.

Katherine was sitting on the couch after dinner enjoying a piece of pumpkin pie, the one request she had made as it never felt like Thanksgiving without it. Even the year before she had bought one, though it had been consumed directly from the pie pan as she sat alone muttering at the screen as she watched Love Actually. She hated Alan Rickman’s character in that movie... and that partially bugged her because she typically loved the actor, but mostly she hated how much she identified with Emma Thompson’s character.

“You look serious.” Rafael teased.

Katherine smiled. “Just zoned out for a sec... nothing serious.” She playfully offered him a bite of her pie but stole it back at the last second. Rafael simply took his own fork and took a bite directly from her plate, chuckling when she pouted at him and accused him of cheating.

“¿Le has dicho que la amas? (Have you told her you love her?)” Catalina asked after watching her grandson interact with Katherine for a bit.

“Abuelita... no, Yo no tengo. Al menos no en inglés... (No, I have not. At least not in English...)” Rafael blushed.

“Debieras. (You should.)” Catalina smiled.

“Voy a... cuando ella esta lista. (I will... when she’s ready.)”

“You’re only saying good things about me I hope.” Katherine smiled.

“Nothing bad to say.” Rafael grinned.

 

“I’m going to be eating leftovers for a month.” Katherine chuckled as she sat the containers of food Lucia had forced upon her in her fridge along side Rafael’s.

“I told you she always makes too much food.” Rafael smirked.

“The food was really good though.”

“Sorry for some of the conversation topics they brought up.”

“It’s fine.” Katherine smiled.

“Is it?”

“Yes... see there’s this guy and he tends to make me forget there was anyone before him.” Katherine moved closer to him and ran her hand up his chest.

“There is?” He smiled.

“Uh huh... if you’re lucky I’ll introduce you one day.” With this comment he lightly smacked her ass and pulled her closer causing her to giggle.

“There can never be anyone but me.” He was more serious than she had expected, not demanding, but lustful and needy.

“Never?” She breathed, her voice catching in her throat.

“I mean... if you’ll have me.” He smiled softly.

“I can’t imagine ever not wanting you.” Katherine exhaled, her lips meeting his when he leaned down. Things were moving fast, faster than she thought they would and it scared her a little... what if she had misread him like she had Scott... there would always be that nagging doubt though wouldn’t there? It wouldn’t matter how long they were together. Scott had damaged her ability to trust her own judgement. Still, it had never been like this with anyone... the connection she felt. It was strong and by the time Rafael had walked her to the bedroom, all doubt was gone. She didn’t want to think about how much he could possibly one day hurt her... she just wanted to enjoy being with him.


	13. Chapter 13

 

The Southwest flight from New York to Atlanta was scheduled to leave at one thirty five and arrive at four ten. Katherine was glad she had let Rafael’s assistant book the flight because all she had found were ones that had either two stops or one stop in Houston, either way she was looking at a seven hour flight minimum. Carman had managed to get them on a direct flight at a reasonable time and Rafael somehow managed to get them checked in so they had spots A1 and A2 for boarding.

“Do I even want to know how you managed this?” Katherine said, lifting her boarding pass for him slightly so he knew she was referencing their position for boarding.

“I just checked us in as soon as I could. I like being in control of where I sit on a plane.” He shrugged.

Katherine did that too, but still ended up A15 or so... one time she managed A7, but only once. Still she let it go. “You prefer the front or the back?”

“What do you think?” He smirked.

“The front... so you can get off faster.” She chuckled.

“You know me well.”

The flight attendant scanned their boarding passes and they followed the small group that qualified for assistance, mostly families with small children, down the hall to the plane.

 

Rafael picked the second row so Katherine would have a place to put her backpack under the seat in front her. He offered her the window, but she declined. “I get claustrophobic on planes... I like the aisle.”

“You know the nice thing about traveling with someone is you don’t have to worry about who you’ll get stuck sitting next to.” Rafael grumbled as they both settled into their seats.

“Not a fan of flying?” She chuckled.

“I’m fine with flying, it’s the people I have a problem with.”

“You really are a snob.” Katherine teased.

“I’m serious, just watch them board.”

Katherine humored him and observed the other passengers entering the plane, receiving a nudge to her side from Rafael when a man wearing a suit tried to type as he carried his laptop in his arms.

“What could he possibly have to do on his computer that’s so important it cant wait until he sits down?” Rafael whispered.

Katherine quietly chuckled and shook her head.

“Oh, or this lady...” he whispered again, gesturing to a woman dragging a bag that most likely wouldn’t fit in the overhead bin, “she will attempt to get that stored, convince some man nicer than I am to help, only to have the flight attendant take it to be checked after stalling the line of people behind her... and...” Rafael paused as he watched her make her way down the center aisle, “she’ll do this toward the front of the plane.” He huffed a little when the lady stopped not ten rows back from them, the exact senecio he described following suit.

“Are you going to complain the whole flight?” Katherine giggled.

“Only if I can hear someone’s life story or I see someone’s feet.” Even Katherine made a face at his feet comment.

 

Once the plane took off, Katherine pulled a deck of cards from her backpack and taught him how to play Gin Rummy. They played a few practice rounds where she showed him her hand as she talked through why she chose to discard or keep certain cards and then they started to play as they chatted.

“Who taught you how to play Gin Rummy?” He asked, almost poking fun as he expected her answer to be a grandparent or something.

“Erin, my best friend growing up.” Katherine smiled.

“Does she still live in Atlanta?”

“She never lived in Atlanta. I knew her when my family lived in Texas.” Katherine drew a card and discarded one she didn’t need.

“I thought you grew up in Atlanta.” Rafael stated as he drew his own card.

“Nope. We moved to Atlanta the summer before my senior year of high school. I was so mad about it at the time, and almost went back to Austin for college. I even got into UT but the out of state tuition was more than I could justify spending since I would be taking out student loans.” Katherine shrugged as she discarded another card.

“Were you born in Austin?”

“I was. Gin!” She grinned laying down her hand for him to see.

“I only needed one card.” He grumbled as she shuffled and dealt the cards again.

“Which do you consider home?” Rafael asked as he lifted his cards.

“Austin. It’s where I grew up. It’s home.”

“So you consider yourself a Texan.” He smiled.

“You know it’s funny because it’s not something that I’ve ever really sat and thought about but if you were to call me a Georgian I’d correct you. I think they ingrain Texas pride in you from a young age there because I’ve never known anyone... even if they couldn’t wait to leave Texas... that didn’t still claim to be a Texan.” Katherine chuckled.

“Is it a place you want to move back to?”

“Not anymore,” she grinned, “gin.”

“Already?”

“You want me to let you win a few rounds?” Katherine teased.

“No.” Rafael smirked.

“I should give you a heads up that we will probably eat dinner Christmas Eve at the club.” She rolled her eyes as she picked up the cards he had dealt.

“That’s fine.”

“Scott’s family will also be there. Not at our table or anything, but at the club.”

“How do you feel about that?” He asked, trying to casually discard a card from his hand.

Katherine shrugged, taking the card he discarded. “I really don’t know how I feel about it. I’d prefer not to see him at all, but it’s unavoidable.”

“Your parents could do dinner somewhere else.”

“That would be asking my mom to not socialize with all of her friends, not to show off the New York prosecutor her daughter has brought home... because that’s what this holiday is supposed to be about.” Katherine huffed.

“We could have stayed in New York and gone to Midnight Mass with my mom and abuelita.”

“Depending on how this goes I may insist on it next year.” Katherine smiled.

“Gin.” Rafael grinned, showing her his hand.

“Beginners luck.” She teased.

“You underestimate how quickly I learn.” He smirked.

“Do you want to go to Midnight Mass?We can find a church.”

“It would make my mami happy.”

“Well if it’ll make mami happy.” She smiled and Rafael rolled his eyes.

“What does your family do?”

“You mean church wise?” Katherine clarified.

“Yes.”

“Nothing.”

“Nothing? Are you religious?”

“Are you?” She countered.

“To the extend that I practice as much as any Catholic that’s forced to attend church on holidays.” He chuckled.

“I really don’t know what I am,” Katherine shrugged as she dealt a new hand, “both my parent were raised Baptist, but we stopped going to church when I was four or five. I have vague memories of Sunday School, but that’s about it. We’ve always celebrated Christmas and I remember hunting for eggs on Easter but honestly didn’t understand the Easter holiday until I was older and read about it on my own. I guess I don’t really prescribe to any religion, but I wouldn’t consider myself atheist or agnostic either. I used to attend different churches with friends when I’d stay the night with ones that attended church.”

“Erin?” He chuckled, referencing the friend who taught her the card game they were playing.

“Erin’s Catholic, insistent upon it, but I never remember her going to church and I basically lived at her house or her at mine. I think her father was Catholic and her mother was something else. Her parents were divorced and she lived with her mom.”

“What kind of churches have you been to?”

“Mostly non denominational, an Episcopal church a few times with one of my other good friends, and a Pentecostal church once. That last one threw me a bit... it was intense, and not something I was up for going back to. It was just a little much for someone with very little experience in a church.” Katherine shrugged.

“So you’re not religious?”

“I wouldn’t say that. Do I pray everyday? No. Do I have conversations with God when I feel lost? Yes. I tend to do my own thing. If I’m faulted for not being raised to follow a specific religion then so be it, but I feel who I am should speak louder than whether I followed one religion or another’s arbitrary guidelines. This extends to my classroom as well. I have so many different cultures every year and they fascinate me. I like to believe that people choose to worship in their own way and just because you may call God by a different name or have different beliefs doesn’t make it wrong... maybe he likes the variety. My only issue is with fundamental beliefs that oppress certain groups, and those can be found in all religions.”

Rafael smirked as he drew a card but didn’t say anything.

“What?” Katherine questioned.

“Gin.” He chuckled as he discarded and showed her his hand.

Katherine smiled and dealt another round.

 

“Who’s picking us up?” Rafael asked as they waited for the luggage.

“I rented a car.”

“You can’t just barrow one of your parents?”

“I could, but then I’d have to ask every time we wanted to get away for a bit. Renting a car just seemed easier.” Katherine shrugged.

“Plan on needing to escape your mother that often?” He chuckled.

“She insisted we stay at their house... I promise you’ll thank me later.” She smiled.

“I should have looked up your driving record.” He teased.

“I’m a good driver. I’ve never caused a wreck.”

“Caused?”

“Someone rear ended me while I was stopped at a red light... I hardly think that counts as my fault.” She laughed.

“What about tickets?”

“What about them?”

“Have you had any?”

“None that I haven’t been able to get removed from my record through defensive driving courses.” She smiled.

“How many?” He pushed, not exactly feeling better about her previous statement.

“Six or seven.”

“Seven?”

“Over the span of nineteen years.” Katherine chuckled.

“That doesn’t make me feel better.” Rafael muttered.

 

Katherine sat in the driveway for a moment, the car still running even though she had placed it in park five minutes ago.

“Are we going in?” Rafael teased.

She took a deep breath and turned the car off. “Yes.”

They grabbed their luggage from the trunk and rang the doorbell. Technically she had a key, but even when she lived in Atlanta she always rang the bell out of courtesy when visiting her parents.

“Katie, Rafael,” her mother smiled, giving them each a hug, “come in.”

Natalie gestured them into the foyer.

“My old room ok for both of us?” Katherine asked.

“Of course,” Natalie smiled, “I’ll let you two get settled in. Your dad will be home at six and I thought we’d do dinner at McKindrick’s.”

“We’ll be down shortly, I feel like I smell like recycled air.” Katherine smiled at her mother and dragged Rafael behind her upstairs.

“What is McKendrick’s?” Rafael asked.

“A steakhouse my parents love.”

“This is your old room?” The bedroom they had entered was larger than he had expected. The whole house, that had been unassuming from the street, was larger than he had expected.

“For a year, then I started college and moved into the dorms.”

“Is this what it looked like?”

“No. My mother redecorated a month after I moved out. There’s an en-suite bathroom which is convenient.” Katherine stated as she hung up her clothes and began to change for dinner. Rafael followed suit, changing into slacks and a sweater.

“Katherine...” He hummed, wrapping his arms around her from behind as she fiddled with her hair.

“Yes.” She smiled.

“I wouldn’t have wanted to spend Christmas without you.”

Katherine turned to face him and wrapped her arms around his neck. “I’m really glad you’re here... and I don’t just mean in Atlanta. I’m really glad I met you... that you’re with me.”

“Me too.” He smiled as she pushed up to kiss him.

 

It was a couple days before Christmas and Rafael had already placed the gift he had gotten Katherine under her parents tree, but had been too busy and honestly at a loss on what to get her parents. Katherine had insisted he didn’t need to get them anything, but still somehow they had ended up spending the morning at the mall.

“Are you sure?” Rafael asked looking at a small crystal figurine.

“She loves them and they’re available in a range of price points so you can spend what your comfortable with.” Katherine said.

“What did you get her?”

“A necklace.”

“This seems safer than jewelry.” He smiled.

“Get one of the smaller ones... the only idea I have for my dad is a book... either a Chuck Palahniuk or Christopher Moore.”

“What did you get your dad?”

“Neil Gaiman’s The Ocean at the End of the Lane and a tie.” She smiled.

“Your dad likes to read then?”

“My mom watches trashy reality TV while my dad tunes it out and reads until the news comes on. They have their system.” Katherine chuckled.

“What about the little owl?” Rafael asked, pointing to the one he was referencing in the case.

“It’s perfect.” Katherine said, grabbing the attention of the sale clerk.

 

“Are you driving in circles?” Rafael chuckled as they passed the same school for the third time.

“I don’t want to go back to my parents yet...”

“We can go for a walk if there’s a park nearby.” He suggested.

Katherine thought for a minute and then turned toward the closest park she could think of.

“Why don’t you want to go home?”

“It’s just the last time I slept there was right after I left Scott and my mom kept telling me how much of a mistake I was making... and I get that I need to move passed that and make new memories, it’s just... I feel like I barely lived at that house before and that summer contains some of my worst memories with my mom.” She pulled into the relatively empty parking lot of the park. “Maybe I should have come back for the first time alone...”

“Would you have really wanted to be here without me?” Rafael smirked.

“No.” Katherine chuckled and climbed out of the car.

“You know I don’t expect you to hold everything in if some of this is getting to you. I knew it wouldn’t be easy for you to come here.” He smiled, taking her hand as they started down the path that circled the park.

“I just wish my mom had been more supportive...”

“So this is about your mom?”

“Yes. I mean I know she thought divorce was my social suicide or something, but didn’t she know me well enough to get that I never cared about that to begin with. She didn’t even listen to my reason for leaving. She thinks it’s because he cheated. She still has no idea...” Katherine grumbled.

Rafael tugged her closer and kissed her.

“What was that for?” She chuckled.

“Nothing.” He smiled, directing her off the path and toward the playground.

“Where are we going?”

“Would you stop asking questions and let me distract you from complaining about your mom.” He smiled holding a swing out for her.

Katherine smiled and sat down as he took the swing next to her. It was the day before Christmas Eve and while not cold it wasn’t exactly warm so the park was deserted except for the two of them.

“Are we seeing who can swing the highest or something?”

“I thought we could just swing a bit, not necessarily make it a competition.” He chuckled.

“Can you drive?” She asked rather randomly, a mischievous look on her face as she cut her eyes at him, swaying slightly on the swing.

“I’ve never really had the need to learn, why?”

“Can I teach you?”

“Right now?” His voice raising an octave.

“Why not? The parking lot is empty.” Katherine grinned, tossing him the keys.

“I don’t have a license.”

“Then we wont leave the parking lot.”

 

Rafael reluctantly sat behind the wheel of her rental car. Adjusting the seat and mirrors so he could see.

“Now keep your foot on the break and shift into reverse.”

“Wouldn’t it be better to go forward first?” He asked.

“Only if you want to drive into the park.” Katherine chuckled.

“I meant you could get out of the parking spot.” He muttered.

“There is literally not a single other car in the entire parking lot... what do you think you’re going to hit?” This time she laughed.

“Fine.” He shifted the car into reverse and eased off the break causing the car to roll slightly but not much.

“You’re going to have to press the gas.”

Rafael rolled his eyes and slowly pressed on the gas and the car inched backwards.

“Maybe press a little harder and turn the wheel so you can actually get out of the spot.” Katherine smiled.

He did and the car jerked backwards. Katherine laughed as he immediately slammed on the breaks again.

“You know I have no desire to learn how to drive.”

“It’s not that difficult, just ease into it when you press harder on the gas.”

Rafael managed to get the car out of the spot and where he could go forward. Slowly he drove, maneuvering the vehicle around the small lot.

“See it’s not that difficult.” Katherine smiled.

“I guess not.”

“You want to drive back to my parents?”

“Not really.” He definitely looked concerned.

“Oh come on, it’s three blocks on residential roads... you wont have to go above twenty if you don’t want to.” She teased.

“That’ll look great... New York ADA gets arrested for driving without a license.”

“You may want to brush up on those law books of yours because usually they just give you a ticket for that.” Katherine chuckled. “Take a left out of the parking lot.”

“You’re serious?”

“As long as you stop at the one stop sign you’ll be fine.”

Rafael begrudgingly drove the car toward the exit and took a left, following her directions as she guided them back to her parents home. He pulled the car into the driveway and handed her the keys as soon as he put it in park and cut the ignition.

“Not a fan?” She smiled.

“You’re just lucky you’re cute.” He smirked.

“You didn’t find driving even slightly enjoyable?”

“No.” He huffed.

“I love you when you’re huffy.” Katherine grinned.

“Only when I’m huffy?” He asked lifting a brow.

“Oh... umm... I...” Katherine’s face flushed as she realized what she had said. “No... not just when you’re huffy.”

“I love you too.” He smiled, pulling her across the console and rather awkwardly into his lap, her lips finding his well before she adjusted enough to straddle him.

“No one’s home.” She panted between kisses. Her mother was at some charity event she had help organize and her father was at work.

“Why are we awkwardly making out in a car like horny teenagers then?” Rafael chuckled.

Both of them clambered out of the drivers side door and grabbed the packages from their shopping trip, giggling as they made their way into the house and upstairs to her old bedroom. Rafael’s arms finding her again the moment the bedroom door closed. The light layers they were wearing, hastily removed as their lips explored one another.

Rafael walked her backwards toward the bed, his eyes intense and lascivious as he advanced on her, crawling on the bed after her, not breaking eye contact as his lips hovered less that an inch above hers.

“I love you.” Katherine breathed, running her fingers through his hair, her eye bouncing between his, desperately wanting contact with him... with his lips, his body pressing against hers... all of him.

As if he knew what she wanted, his lips made contact, his hands cupped her face and she could feel him easing into her. Soft moans filled the room as he began to move. Their bodies never breaking contact, Katherine panting for air when his lips would trail down her neck before covering her mouth again.

She stopped herself from telling him she loved him again. It was the only thing she could think at that point so she stayed quiet except for her moans, afraid if she called his name or made any attempt to speak an I love you would ramble out on it’s own and she didn’t want to freak him out by saying it too much. The feelings she had for him were intense, something she had never felt before... it made her question whether she had ever actually love Scott, hell anyone, before. Not that she was thinking about that at this moment, her mind focused on keeping her mouth shut as she enjoyed being with him. Still, these feeling scared her... What if they weren’t reciprocated? What if she got hurt? What if this was all he wanted? What if... What if... What if... She gripped him tighter, slipping her tongue between his lips. At this point she’d be heart broken anyway, so she may as well live in the moment right?

Rafael rolled them so that she was on top, his thumb reaching between them so he could stimulate her clit as she rode him.

“Fuck...” Katherine groaned, breaking contact with his lips and adjusting so she could get better leverage, continuing to move on him despite the feeling building in her core.

It wasn’t long before she buckled back against his chest, Rafael pressing his feet flat to the bed and continuing to thrust upward, his thumb still swirling her nub.

My god...” She moaned, gripping his cheeks with both hands, her head pressing into his chest.

“I love you, Katherine.” His voice was breathy and raspy... torrid... sending her over the edge, his own release seeming to follow suit as she clamped down on him.

Katherine laid on his chest as she caught her breath, Rafael’s breathing still leveling out as well as he moved both arms to wrap around her, squeezing her against him.

“I can never get close enough to you...” He breathed almost apologetically as he loosened his grip.

Katherine smiled and pressed her self closer to him. “It’s never close enough.”

Rafael smiled when she looked up at him and pressed his lips to hers, his arms tightening ever so slightly around her.


	14. Chapter 14

>  

Katherine laid in bed, watching Rafael softly snore next to her, chuckling when he seemed to grumble something in his sleep. She lightly ran her hand up Rafael’s chest only to have his hand wrap around hers when she got closer to his face.

“Morning.” He smirked.

“Morning.” She grinned.

“What’s on the agenda for today?”

“My mother and I will make brunch and then we are free to do whatever until dinner which is at eight.”

“Whatever, huh?” Rafael smirked.

“I was thinking we could lounge around and watch movies.” Katherine chuckled.

“That is not the whatever I had in mind.”

“Sorry to disappoint, but we wont have the house to ourselves today. I did find a Catholic Church that we can go to for Midnight Mass.”

“Mami will be pleased.” He smiled.

Katherine chuckled and shook her head as she reluctantly climbed out of bed. She gathered things for her shower and then glanced back at Rafael.

“Care to join me?”

“What happened to not having the house to ourselves?” He smirked as he climbed out of bed.

“Surely the shower will muffle some noise.”

Rafael wrapped his arms around her, walking her into the bathroom, his lips pressing against the skin at the crook of her neck. Katherine turned in his arms to face him, slipping her shirt over her head in the process. His hands immediately grazed the soft skin of her breast until she moved to tug his shirt off.

“I should start the water.” She grinned, pulling away from him. When she turned back around he was already undressed and reaching for her shorts.

His body pressed her back against the shower wall, water cascading around them as he kissed her. Katherine moved her kisses down his neck, his chest... lowering herself to the shower floor and reaching her hands up to stroke him as she wrapped her lips around his head. He watched her bob on him, her eyes occasionally glancing up to his, but mostly focused on his length disappearing between her lips.

“Dios mío, Katherine. (My god, Katherine.)” He moaned, gripping her hair with one hand while bracing himself against the wall with the other.

Katherine sucked lightly each time she took him in, tightening her throat muscles around his tip when she held him there before pulling back again.

“Mierda...” He groaned, thrusting into her mouth before he could stop himself.

Katherine didn’t relent, she took him in and held him as deep as she could, constricting her throat muscles around him again as though trying to swallow. Rafael let out a few low grunts and pulled out of her mouth, releasing onto the shower floor.

He was still panting as he sat on the shower bench next to Katherine who merely smiled at him.

“Please tell me I have time to return the favor.” He smirked, reaching between her legs and sliding his fingers along her slit.

“You have time.” She smiled.

Rafael pressed his lips to hers and then slid to the floor in front of her, pushing both of her feet up to either side of her hips and pulling her to the edge of the bench. His tongue sliding up her slit before focusing on her clit, his fingers pressing inside her.

“Fuck Raf...” She breathed while leaning her head back against the tile wall.

He continued to swirl her nub, flicking it, sucking gently, his fingers probing deeper, first one then two, curling inside her making her hips buck.

“Jesus.” Katherine moaned, buckling forward and gripping his hair with both hands as her hips jerked. “Ok...ok...”

Rafael kissed back up her body, pulling her to her feet as he found her lips. Her legs threatened to give out beneath her, but she managed to find her footing in time for him to turn her to face the wall and push her to her knees on the bench. Lining himself up, he pushed into her, kissing her when she glance over her shoulder at him.

Katherine braced herself on the wall as he thrust, pushing his hand away from her clit when he reached for it, an act that elicited a small grin from him. Instead, he opted to cup her breast, pinching each nipple as he thrust, making long hard strokes, pulling out to just the tip and pushing back in.

“My god.” Katherine groaned as she felt herself tighten around him, initiating his own release as he continued to pump, though slightly slower now.

Rafael collapsed against her back, breathing heavy as he all but leaned on her for support. “Sorry it wasn’t more tender.” He panted.

“We really didn’t have time for tender.” She chuckled.

“But still,” he said pulling out and bringing both of them under the water, “I’m pretty sure that qualifies as fucking and I want you to know how much I love you.”

“There’s nothing wrong with a good fuck every now and then as long as it’s not all we do,” Katherine smirked, “and you tell me you love me.”

She pushed up to kiss him, letting his arms wrap around her until he broke the embrace. “We should probably finish our shower before I push you up against the wall and we end up spending our whole day in here.” He chuckled.

Katherine smiled and handed him the shampoo.

 

The dress Katherine had picked out fit her extremely well. Rafael didn’t mention anything, but he knew it was a bit of a screw you to her ex husband. It was a deep red, fitting for Christmas, shortsleeved with a sweetheart neckline and hugged her curves all the way down her body stopping just passed her knees. She looked fantastic in it and Rafael kind of hoped her ex would be a little jealous that Katherine was his now.

“I love your hair like this.” Natalie said, gently touching the soft curls in Katherine’s hair when she and Rafael entered the living room.

“So do I.” Katherine smiled.

“This dress is perfect too, you look stunning.” Her mother added.

“Thanks mom.”

“You look very nice too Rafael.” Natalie smiled.

He was wearing a dark charcoal three piece suit with a white dress shirt and muted red paisley tie with matching pocket square. His suspenders were a ridiculously bright yellow and brown argyle print that Katherine found endearing despite being thankful no one but her had seen them and his socks pulled the red back in from his tie.

“What time are we leaving?”

“Your father will be down in a moment and then we’ll go.” Natalie said.

“Are we taking one car or two?” Rafael asked.

“Anxious to drive again?” Katherine teased.

Rafael thinned his lips and narrowed his eyes.

“I’m kidding, we’ll ride with my parents. Both of us in the back seat like you’re accustomed to.” Katherine chuckled.

 

They followed her parents into the country club that was set up both for dinner and socializing.

“Elizabeth, hi,” Natalie smiled, giving the woman she was greeting a hug.

“Natalie... and my goodness Kate. You look fantastic.” Elizabeth said, almost forcing her to spin in a circle. “They say nothing beats a good divorce diet.”

“Oh... I think it has more to do with...”

Katherine was interrupted by her mother. “And this is her boyfriend, Rafael Barba, he’s a prosecutor with the Manhattan DA’s office.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” Elizabeth said, extending her hand.

“You too.” Rafael smiled shaking it.

This scenario repeating itself while Natalie chatted with the different friends she passed on the way to their table, Katherine completely giving up attributing the weight loss to all the walking she did in New York... what was the point... divorce diet was all they would remember anyway.

“Kate. Hi.” Chelsea stammered when they almost ran into each other.

“Hi Chelsea.” Katherine replied. She didn’t smile, bit she wasn’t rude either.

“Umm...”

Rafael put his hand on Katherine waist and moved closer to her, mostly because he was curious about the woman her ex had cheated on her with. He now understood her mothers bimbo description, her hair had been back teased so much he wondered if she would be able get a brush through it and the dress she wore looked like she was going to a night club instead of Christmas dinner.

“You look fantastic, I can’t believe you’ve recently had a baby.” Katherine said, smiling this time.

“Thanks. Scott hired a personal trainer for me so I could shed the baby weight faster.” Chelsea mouth formed a smile but her eyes didn’t match. It was a look Katherine was all too familiar with.

“This is Rafael.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” Chelsea said, giving him a small wave instead of shaking his hand as she glanced passed them seeming distracted by something. “I should go.”

Rafael furrowed his brow as she quickly made her way to a table across the room, her eyes dropping to the floor as the man she joined spoke to her.

“That was an odd interaction.” He said as they walked to the table her parents were already seated at.

“You mean the fact that she ran off so quickly?” Katherine questioned.

“Yeah...”

“He’s scolding her for talking to me.” Katherine huffed, gesturing to Scott who was still whispering in Chelsea’s ear.

Rafael smirked and took her hand, tugging it gently into his lap.

“What do you find so amusing?” She smiled.

“Nothing.” He smiled at her.

 

Dinner had been nice. It was the two of them and her parents at the table. The food was good and the conversations light, Katherine’s mother not even mentioning the interaction with Chelsea that Katherine knew she had witnessed.

“Hi Steph.” Katherine smiled when a petite blond pulled a chair up almost forcing herself between Katherine and Rafael.

“Kate.” Stephanie grinned. “This ones much more attractive than my brother.”

“Steph, this is Rafael Barba. Rafael, this is Stephanie Howell, Scott’s sister.”

“That almost sounds like an insult.” Stephanie chuckled.

“It wasn’t.” Katherine chuckled as well. She had always gotten along well with Stephanie and had missed her, but didn’t know what Scott had told his family about their divorce so she hadn’t tried to call.

“I didn’t mean an insult towards me.” Stephanie smiled.

“Well in that case it might have been.”

“My brother’s such an ass. I can’t believe you tolerated him for as long as you did.”

Katherine questioned for a second whether Stephanie knew just how bad her relationship with Scott had been, but then remembered that Stephanie always called Scott an ass.

“I know Chelsea’s not someone you would hangout with...”

“Not even close to someone I’d hangout with.” Stephanie muttered as she interrupted causing Rafael to chuckle.

“I know, but check in on her from time to time.” Katherine said.

“You want me to check in on the woman your ex husband had an affair with leading to your divorce?” Stephanie furrowed her brow at her.

“I didn’t know he was cheating when I left.”

“You left?” Stephanie asked, both brows raised now.

“Why did he tell you we got divorce?”

“He said he left you for Chelsea when he found out she was pregnant. I’ve kind of been a bitch to her... mom and me both have.”

“Just check in on her... Scott isn’t the easiest person to live with.” Katherine sighed.

“I figured you’d hate her. I mean regardless of whether you knew or not she was still sleeping with your husband.”

“Chelsea’s naive and Scott can be charming when he wants to. I don’t entirely blame her...”

“Naive isn’t the word I’d used,” Stephanie smiled, “but if it will make you happy I’ll check in with her.”

“It would, tell your mom to be nicer to her too.” Katherine added.

“My brother is an idiot... you’re such a better person than Chelsea.”

“I’m happy with how things have turned out.” Katherine smiled at Rafael.

“You’re not an idiot are you?” Stephanie asked.

“Far from it.” Rafael smirked.

Stephanie eyed him up and down. “What do you do?”

“I’m a prosecutor.”

“Hmmm... Where’d you go for law school?” She pried.

“Harvard.”

“Definitely not an idiot then...”

“We both know that’s not what you meant by idiot.” Rafael chuckled, taking a sip of his scotch.

“No... definitely not an idiot.” Stephanie smiled.

 

Katherine grinned as she stole a bite of Rafael’s desert and he countered by stealing a larger bite of hers.

“Here,” he said, offering her another bite of his when she pouted.

Katherine chuckled but didn’t take him up on the offer. “Is it safe to leave mine here while I run to the restroom?”

“I promise not steal another bite until you return.” Rafael smirked.

Katherine rolled her eyes and grazed her fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck as she stood. Everything about the club was familiar. Her parents had done Christmas there since they moved to Atlanta, joining Scott’s family when the two of them had become serious enough to spend the holiday together. It was also the place her and Scott had originally met.

_“Oh... I’m sorry.” Scott apologized after bumping into her as she exited the bathroom. “It’s ok.” Katherine smiled. She was twenty seven then and had just broken up with her on again off again boyfriend of three years, James. Another guy who had treated her like shit... “Let me buy you a drink, make up for it.” Scott smiled. “Why not.” Katherine shrugged, following him to the bar instead of returning to her parents table for her mothers endless advice on where to meet quality men. He had been charming and sweet and they had talked for hours, only exchanging numbers when her mother came to tell her they were leaving._

It had been Christmas Eve then too and something about walking passed the spot they met had triggered the memory. Katherine glanced at herself in the mirror, someone she almost didn’t recognize staring back at her. So much had changed.

“You moved on quickly.”

Katherine tensed at his voice, but took a breath and forced herself to continue walking passed Scott as she exited the restroom. “You’re one to talk.”

“That’s different. Chelsea and I had been together for years.”

She knew the comment was meant to hurt her and she did her best not to let it show that it actually had.

“You look good, better than you ever did with me.” Scott said. Katherine paused, but still didn’t turn to face him. “If you had looked like that I may not have had need for Chelsea.”

Tears stung at the corners of her eyes. She took a breath and resumed forward wanting nothing more than to return to Rafael.

“He’ll get bored you know... you’re fun at the beginning but then you become complaisant. No one wants to be with someone who doesn’t have their own life.”

Katherine didn’t bother to acknowledge him. Part of her desperately wanted to run back to the bathroom and give herself a moment to regroup before joining Rafael and her parents, but doing so wasn’t an option with Scott still standing there. Instead she took a few deep breaths as she continued on her path to the table.

“I kept your desert safe.” Rafael smiled when she sat down.

“I’m not hungry.”

“You ok?” He whispered.

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

Rafael gave her a curious look, but didn’t push.

“I’ll tell you later.” Katherine sighed.

 

Natalie talked the whole drive back to her parents house, not about anything in particular just idle gossip about the same women Katherine had heard countless stories about before. Rafael smiled and squeezed her hand when Katherine rolled her eyes at a few of her mothers comments.

“What time will you two be back from church?” Natalie asked.

“I’m not sure.” Katherine replied.

“Well, just use your key. You still know the alarm code?”

“Unless you’ve changed it since yesterday I remember.” Katherine chuckled.

It was close to eleven when they pulled into her parents drive so Rafael and Katherine decided to head out without going inside first.

“What was wrong earlier?” Rafael asked as Katherine drove.

“I ran into Scott as I was leaving the restroom and he was an ass.”

“What did he say?”

“It doesn’t matter.” Katherine sighed.

“If it upset you it matters.”

“He just said that if I had looked like this then he might not have needed Chelsea...” Katherine huffed.

“You were as beautiful then as you are now.”

“You didn’t know me then, but I appreciate the sentiment.” Katherine smiled, turning to look at him briefly before placing her eyes back on the road.

“If I remember correctly I told you as much right after you kissed me that first time.” Rafael said.

“Yes, but I had been crying and you were just being nice.”

“I’m not that nice.” He smirked.

“Yes you are.”

“If I was just being nice why did I spend the next year thinking about you? Wishing you lived in New York instead of Atlanta.”

Katherine was quiet. Her mind screwing with her as it always did after Scott opened his mouth. The years of damage he’d inflicted on her self worth seeming to completely demolish the progress she had made since she’d moved.

“What else did he say?” Rafael pushed.

“That you’d get bored with me.”

“Pull over.”

“What?” She blurted, glancing at him again.

“I want to talk where you can actually look at me.”

Katherine reluctantly found a place to pull into and park. Rafael took her hands in his forcing her to turn and face him.

“I’m not going to become bored with you... ever. I can’t tell you why I feel so certain about you... about us, just like I can’t explain why it only took one kiss for you to appear in dreams and in my thoughts at random times on any given day. I just know.”

“Dreams?” Katherine smirked, but he knew she was deflecting, trying to soften the mood to avoid talking about Scott and whatever insecurities she still had because of him.

“I’m not him.”

“I know...” She exhaled. “It’s also only been seven months and the way I feel about you...” Katherine paused and then almost whispered, “I’m not sure I’ll ever feel like I’m good enough.”

Rafael opened his mouth to speak but she spoke again before he could, not even looking up from their hands to notice he was going to say something. “I’m afraid of being hurt again. I’m afraid of trusting my own judgement at times... because I feel certain too... but I’m also the same person who willingly married a man who ended up not being the person I thought he was.” Katherine’s eyes met his. “Honestly, I know you’re different, that this is different, but he get’s in my head... it’s been a year and a half since I’ve heard his voice and he can still make me feel inconsequential. I wasn’t expecting that and I don’t know how long it will take for me to get passed it.” She exhaled and blinked a few times trying to hide the fact that her eyes had watered.

“I’ve got all the time in the world.” Rafael smiled.

“Do you?”

“I do.”

“Why?” Katherine breathed, looking down again as her mind ran through every fault she feared he’d eventually find.

“Because I love you... all of you, insecurities and all.” He had a small smirk on his face when he lifted her gaze back to his.

“Can we do Christmas in New York next year?” She smiled.

“Your parents could even join us if you wanted.”

“Oh, my mom would love that...” Katherine chuckled. “Christmas in New York. Her friends would never hear the end of it.”

“Maybe it’ll be the start our own tradition.” He grinned, pulling her over the console so he could kiss her.

“I love you too, Raf.” Katherine breathed, pressing her forehead to his.

“I know you do.”

“Can you share some of that confidence?” She chuckled.

“How about we build up your own instead.” Rafael smiled.

“That’s even better.”

Katherine kissed him one more time and then shifted back into drive taking his hand in hers as she started toward the church again.

 


	15. Chapter 15

 

_“Seriously, Scott... can you not watch me?” Katherine chuckled as she mix the ingredients for her granny’s sugar cookie recipe. “You’re going to attract bugs.” He grumbled. “I’ll clean when I’m through.” The cookies were for her classes holiday party. She enjoyed baking but rarely had the time during the school year... even now she really didn’t have the time, but she always made cookies for her class and decorated them with royal icing so she could transport them to school easily. It would take the better part of her Sunday, but would be totally worth it in the end. “You just knocked sugar in the floor.” Scott huffed. “Seriously... go watch TV or something.” Katherine grumbled. She didn’t want to fight or argue or stop what she was doing, though she did resign to bake them at her parents house the next year. Scott stood his ground and continued to watch her movements. Katherine worked cautiously, intentionally moving each ingredient to minimize spillage onto the counter. “How many are you going to eat?” Scott teased, but it wasn’t really a tease and her body stiffened as she did her best to ignore him. She didn’t bake enough to justify a large mixer so she only had a hand held one. Carefully she started it on it’s slowest setting, hoping to avoid much of the mixer flinging out of the bowl. Scott made a comment but she was so focused it didn’t register. When she shifted the mixer to a higher setting flour spun out. “You’re getting it everywhere.” Scott barked. “I’ll clean the fucking floor!” Katherine snapped, jumping back when Scott jerked toward her. Her heart was thumping in her chest even though he had moved less than a foot forward. It was the look on his face... Contempt mixed with anger and she was pretty sure he had barely stopped himself. “I make cookies for the kids every year.” She whispered. “I’m going out. I want everything cleaned up by the time I get back.” He hissed, backing away from her and heading toward the garage. Katherine took a breath and finished the cookie dough, letting it set in the fridge as she mixed up the royal icing, placing the three different colors she’d need in piping bags. She gathered everything she’d need to bake and decorate the cookies to take to her parents and cleaned the kitchen, ensuring everything was spotless before leaving herself._

Katherine’s heart was still pounding when her eyes popped open. Rafael was sleeping soundly next to her and she relaxed, taking a deep breath. She pulled herself closer to him, while glancing over his chest at the clock... four thirty...

“Go back to sleep.” He murmured, barely waking as he pulled his arm around her.

Katherine smiled and rested her head on his chest, his relaxed heart beat, effectively slowing hers even though the dream still lingered. They had been back in New York for two nights and this was the second night Scott had invaded her sleep. Rafael hadn’t woken at all the first time and Katherine had spent the next hour trying to calm herself enough to fall asleep again. This time Rafael’s embrace lulled her back to sleep with little effort on her part.

 

Rafael was sitting in the bed next to her reading when she finally woke up. “Morning.” He smiled when she looked up at him.

“You didn’t have stay in bed with me, I would have found you.”

“I like being next to you.”

Katherine smiled. “I’ll like being next to you too.”

Rafael sat his book on the nightstand and scooted back down in the bed to kiss her, his arms wrapping around her and pulling her against him. Katherine smiled into their kiss and pulled herself more on top of him, intensifying the kiss before pulling back to look at him.

“What woke you up last night?”

“A had a bad dream...” It wasn’t a dream so much as a memory... and one she didn’t really want to talk about.

“What about?”

“Something ridiculous that I barely remember. It just startled me I guess.” She was lying. She still remembered the dream vividly. She remember the day vividly... how she felt... her heart pounding in her chest... the look on Scott’s face... It was the first time she thought Scott might be capable of hitting her and yet it would be another six months before she actually left him. She was thankful he never had, but still felt pathetic for not leaving sooner and she didn’t really want to admit that.

“I hate dreams like that... the ones that jerk you awake, but you can’t remember. They just leaving you feeling unsettled.”

“Me too.”

Rafael pulled her back to his lips and she wanted nothing more than to stay wrapped in his arms, but nature called.

“I have to pee... maybe brush my teeth.” She could taste the mint on his breath so she assumed he had already been out of bed once that morning.

“I’ll be here.” Rafael smiled picking his book back up.

 

Katherine stared at herself after washing her hands. “Just breathe... that’s not your life anymore.” She took a few deep breaths while splashing water on her face. That part of her life was over, and she knew the dreams would go away once she had more distance from their trip to Atlanta. It was just the shock of seeing him... witnessing how he hadn’t changed. Things would return to normal and she would feel like herself again. Quickly she brushed her teeth, smiling as she peeked out of the bathroom to see Rafael engrossed in his book.

“Must be good.” She chuckled when he didn’t seem to notice her return until the bed shifted as she crawled back under the covers.

“It’s not bad.” He smirked, setting it back down on the nightstand and pulling her closer.

“Raf...” She lightly grazed her fingers down his chest and stomach, tracing imaginary shapes as she went.

“Yes.” He replied, the corners of his mouth twitching upward as her hand made contact with him, slowly stroking up his shaft.

“There’s nothing pressing we need to do today is there?”

“Not that I can think of.” He breathed, running the hand of the arm not wrapped around her through her hair, pushing the loose bits behind her ear.

“I want to lose myself in you.” Katherine’s eyes never left his as he pulled her beneath him.

“I’m pretty sure it’s me who loses myself in you.” Rafael smiled, lowering himself enough to kiss her, while still allowing space between them for her hand to continue to stroke him.

“I love you.” Katherine panted when his lips moved to her neck and hand cupped her breast, thumb grazing her nipple. His mouth engulfed the other, tongue swirling her hardened nub as the hand previously on her breast trailed lower, slipping between her legs, dipping into her warmth. Katherines breathing became heavy, her free hand gripping into his hair when his fingers moved to tease her clit.

“I need you...” She groaned, tugging his lips back to hers as her back arched and hips bucked against his fingers. “Please.” The plea sounded strained as he body worked against her. Rafael settled himself between her legs, removing her hand from him as he lined up with her entrance. Both of her hands were either his his hair or on his cheek, keeping his mouth close to hers as he eased in. Her breath hitched as he bottomed out and his body pressed flush against hers.

“I could stay like this forever...” He purred, pulling back just enough to look at her.

“It’s almost a shame we can’t.” Katherine smiled.

Rafael smirked, his hand cupping her cheek as he pulled out leaving just his tip, then thrust back into her.

“This is somehow better though...” She moaned, pulling his lips back to hers while ignoring the smug smile spreading across his face.

He continued to push into her, taking his time as they had all day. It may have been a Monday, but he had taken off until after the new year and had fibbed a bit to Liv on when they would return from Atlanta to avoid any unwanted calls. Katherine had given Amanda the same return date, giving them both the opportunity to indulge in a few days all to themselves. They had barely left his apartment...

“Fuck...” Katherine groaned as his pace picked up, her hips grinding against his.

Her head was the first to arch back, then her body as her hips stilled against his, she could feel every inch of him moving inside her as she tightened around him. Rafael grunted against her neck, holding back as long as he could before giving into his own release, his full weight coming to rest on top of her.

“I love you too.” He panted against her neck.

“I know.” She smiled, running her hand through his hair.

 

“How was Atlanta?” Amanda asked as she and Katherine found a table at a bar not far from their building. It was New Years Eve and Rafael had planned to meet them a little later, giving the two a chance to catch up.

“It was better and worse than I expected.” Katherine chuckled.

“You saw Scott then?”

“Yeah... I mean I knew he’d be at the club, that I’d see him... I just didn’t expect him to stalk me outside of the bathroom and actually talk to me.”

“What did he say?”

“That if I had look like I do know he wouldn’t have cheated and then told me Rafael would get bored with me.” Katherine huffed.

“You know he just said that to get to you.” Amanda said smiling at the waitress who had come to take their drink order.

“I know...” Katherine sighed after the waitress left.

“Does Barba know he talked to you?”

“Yes.”

“And...”

“He was perfect and supportive.” Katherine grumbled.

“You make that seem like a bad thing.” Amanda chuckled.

“I don’t want him to have to be supportive... I just want to be with him.”

“I get that.”

The waitress sat their drinks down and Katherine took a sip of her martini.

“Oh... I invited Carisi to join us.” Amanda said before taking a sip of her own drink.

“I though Carisi drove you nuts.” Katherine gave her a curious look.

“He was looking for something to do and I didn’t want to feel like a third wheel.” Amanda shrugged.

“Things not working out with Nick then?”

“I’m pretty sure that ship has sailed... that and he has his daughter tonight.”

“Would you have invited him if he had been free?”

“Probably... at least then I might get laid.” Amanda grumbled.

“Not sleeping with Carisi then?” Katherine grinned.

Amanda narrowed her eyes at Katherine, clearly not amused by her question.

“He asks a lot of questions but he’s attractive.” Katherine chuckled.

“Who’s attractive?” Carisi asked taking the seat perpendicular to Amanda at the table.

“No one.” Katherine chuckled again.

“Hey Kate.”

“Sonny.” She smiled.

“Did you and that guy you were seeing ever label things?” Carisi questioned from across the table, having purposefully left the seat next to Katherine open in case she was expecting someone.

“Yes, he’ll be joining us in a bit.” Katherine smiled.

“I thought you knew who she was dating.” Amanda stated.

“How would I know that, we’ve spoken maybe twice.” Carisi shrugged, placing his drink order with the waitress as both Amanda and Katherine exchanged a glance.

 

It was maybe an hour later and whether Carisi intended to or not, he had both of them chuckling through the majority of that hour.

“Glad you three are having a good time.” Rafael smiled taking the seat closest to Katherine.

“Oh Barba, her boyfriend’s joining us.” Carisi said gesturing at Katherine and the seat Rafael had taken, then turned to Amanda, “You invited Barba?”

“Not exactly.” Amanda chuckled.

Rafael rolled his eyes and took Katherines hand in his, pulling it into his lap. “You two get caught up?”

“For the most part.” Katherine smiled.

“Wait... Barba’s your boyfriend?” Carisi blurted.

“Her picture is sitting prominently on my desk... What kind of detective are you?”

“Sorry I don’t obsess over the things littering your desk...” Carisi grumbled.

Katherine and Amanda chuckled again.

“How’d you two...” Carisi paused briefly as he thought about how he wanted to word his question, “become you two?”

“Katherine randomly kissed me outside the bullpen a year an a half ago.” Rafael grinned.

“I didn’t not.” Katherine muttered, smacking the back of her hand against his chest.

“You didn’t?” Rafael’s eyes were wide and playful.

“Ok, I did do that... but that’s not how we started dating.”

“I think it had a little something to do with it.” He smirked.

“So if I hadn’t kissed you, we wouldn’t be together?”

“All I know is you did... I have no idea how that night we were all at the bar would have gone if you hadn’t.”

“I’m really glad I kissed you then.” Katherine smiled.

“And I’m sorry I asked.” Carisi mumbled, causing Amanda to laugh.

“This is the place you picked?” Rafael questioned Amanda as he glanced around the bar.

“It’s a bit of a dive, but it’s close to home.” Amanda shrugged.

“I can see why you weren’t worried about finding a table.” Rafael smirked.

“The service is great and they’ll have your scotch.” Amanda smirked back.

 

The night sped on, the small group getting along quite well considering... it helped that Caris hadn’t brought up Fordham.

“I had really hoped for a better selection...” Amanda muttered as she glanced around the bar.

“Selection of what?” Carisi asked.

“Men.” Rafael answered while rolling his eyes.

“Oh...” Carisi said thoughtfully, “The selection of women isn’t so great either...”

“I’d blame it on the quality of the bar.” Rafael huffed.

“I’ve picked up lots of men here.” Amanda smiled.

“That’s not saying much.” Rafael smirked.

“I’m never going to live down sleeping with my sponsor, huh?”

Rafael’s eyes softened, having hated being the one to have exposed the kind of man her sponsor really was to her. Especially the way he had. “That’s not who I meant...”

“Who then?” Carisi asked, not picking up on the mood shift.

“Nick.” Amanda smiled, letting Rafael off the hook once more... she had really meant it when she told him it wasn’t his fault.

“I didn’t think they knew.” Katherine said, glancing at Amanda.

“Apparently we weren’t as discreet as we thought.” Amanda chuckled.

“It’s definitely over then?” Katherine asked.

Amanda shrugged and knock back her drink in time for the waitress to appear while passing out flutes of champagne.

Rafael examined the little glass before sniffing it and setting it back down. “When I have a headache tomorrow, I’m blaming this.” He grumbled.

“The tiny glass of champagne?” Katherine chuckled.

“Yes.” He smirked pulling her closer.

“You deal with this Barba often?” Carisi asked, watching how affectionately Rafael acted toward Katherine.

“Unfortunately.” Amanda chuckled.

“Too sweet for your taste?” Carisi teased.

“I don’t know... a little of that might be nice...” Amanda shrugged, her eyes meeting with his for a brief second before the waitress sat her new drink down.

Katherine saw the smile tug briefly at Carisi’s lips, but her focus was soon brought back to Rafael when the patrons in the bar started counting down the new year.

_Ten, nine, eight..._

“Are you going to drink your champagne?” She smirked.

“Eventually...”

_Five, four, three..._

“More pressing matters to deal with?” Katherine smirked, his lips meeting hers as the bar erupted in shouts of Happy New Year.

“Happy New Year.” Rafael hummed against her cheek.

“Happy New Year.” She smiled, glancing up just in time to see Carisi’s lips leave a stunned looking Amanda, only to hop out of his chair joining in the celebration of the tables closest to them.

“You ok?” Katherine asked while trying not to laugh at the look on Amanda’s face.

“Carisi kissed me...” Amanda grumbled, grabbing her whiskey and knocking it back.

“You could do worse.” Rafael said, not even bothering to hide his amusement.

“I take it back... I don’t approve.” Amanda muttered, pointing between the two of them.

“Oh... ok.” Katherine smiled. “I approve of yours though.” She added grinning as she gestured with her eyes at Carisi.

“I really hate you.” Amanda said, tossing a sugar packet at Katherine.

“To a better year than last.” Carisi said, lifting his glass of champagne as he rejoined the group.

“That’s a tall order.” Katherine smiled, lifting her own glass as she looked at Rafael.

“I’ll see what I can do.” Rafael smirked, picking his up as the four of them drank.

 


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Episode reference: Season 16 Episode 9, Forgiving Rollins
> 
> I will be taking some liberties with the shows timeline and may alter some things completely, but if I build off an episode I’ll try to remember to reference it.

 

Katherine was getting home late... too late for a school night... but she hadn’t wanted to leave Rafael and she hadn’t brought anything to his house for the next morning. Besides it was easier to get ready for work at her own home, she had just gotten used to sleeping next to him over the brief break.

“Amanda?”

The blond was fumbling with her keys at the main entrance to their building.

“Kate. Good timing.” Amanda slurred, almost falling while stepping back so Katherine could open the door.

“You’re drunk.”

“Guilty.” Amanda chuckled and leaned her head against the wall a bit more forcefully than she intended. She rubbed her scalp where it hit while making a pained faced.

“I mean you’re really drunk. You never get this drunk even when you don’t have to work in the morning.”

Katherine got the door opened and started up the stairs, helping Amanda as she went.

“Tough case...” Amanda muttered.

“You want to talk about it?”

“Not really...”

Katherine gave her a curious look but didn’t say anything else until they reached Amanda’s door. “You’re sure you don’t want to talk... is it Nick?”

“APD’s in town.” Amanda grumbled, handing her keys to Katherine.

“Sam Reynolds and the good ole boys... enough said.” Katherine huffed as she got Amanda inside.

“Yeah...” Amanda sighed.

“I’m here if you need to vent... you don’t have to drink alone.”

“Maybe next time.”

“Night Mandy.” Katherine smirked when she got closer to the door.

“I hate you.” Amanda chuckled as she slipped out.

 

“Raf...” Katherine panted.

“Yes.” He grunted against her neck, continuing to pump into her.

“Never mind...” Her voice hitched as he hit a particularly sensitive spot.

Rafael pulled himself up to look at her, his thumb grazing over her lips then cheek, prompting her to speak again. “I’ll ask after.”

“You’re sure?” He questioned though his body hadn’t relented the deep steady rhythm he had set.

“Yes.” Katherine mewled softly, her hips fighting for a moment against his as her body arched into his chest. Rafael pressed his lips to hers and thrust harder, riding through her moment of euphoria, slowing but not stopping when she reached the other side.

He wrapped her in his arm, pulling her back against his chest, and slid into her again from their new spooning position, his hands exploring while he gave her a moment for her breathing to settle. Both hands cupped her breast when he pulled back, pinching her nipples between his thumb and forefinger as he thrust back into her. The soft throaty gasp that escaped her drove him deeper and he had to pause so things didn’t end right then.

“Raf?” She panted, glancing back over her shoulder as his hands slipped to her stomach and hips.

“I just need a second.” His voice was breathy and strained, shifting higher in pitch when Katherine moved her hips against his. He exhaled a chuckle and pressed a kiss to her shoulder, slowly building momentum again, one arm gripping tightly around her waste and the other dipping lower.

He waited until her body bucked, trying to pull away from him, before he wrapped her tightly in both arms, keeping her close. Her head had arched back against his shoulder when he cupped her breast again, gently kneading them in time with his thrust. Katherine whimpered softly when his thumbs grazed her nipples. Her head turned and her next moan was absorbed by his mouth and own groan as his hips made one last push into her before stilling. His tongue explored hers while his fingers tweaked her nipples.

“Enjoying yourself?” Katherine chuckled as her body spasmed against him with each pinch.

“Immensely.” Rafael smirked, letting her move his hands as she turned in his arms to face him. “What did you want to ask me earlier?”

“I was just curious about the case SVU picked up. Amanda seemed upset by it.”

Rafael shifted to his back and pulled Katherine so that her head rested on his chest. “One of APD’s detectives has accused their Deputy Chief of rape.”

“Charlie Patton?” Katherine lifted up to look at him, sounding somehow surprised and not that surprised at the same time.

“You know him?” Rafael’s surprise was less subdued and definitely had a hint of concern behind it.

“My mom’s friends with his wife, Vivienne... so is Amanda’s for that matter.” Katherine felt Rafael’s body relax. “What’s going on?”

“I’m not sure I’m the one to talk to you about this.” He sighed.

“Did he do something to Amanda?”

Rafael bit his lip and took a breath. “I don’t know... she says it wasn’t...” He didn’t complete his sentence, but Katherine didn’t need him to, she could tell he wasn’t comfortable talking about whatever was going on with Amanda.

“I’ll talk to Amanda.”

“Thank you.” He smiled, exhaling softly as he pulled her against him again.

“What do you want to eat?” Rafael had come by her place for dinner before going back into the office to work later than he wished he had to. The activities that had led them to her bed being impromptu.

His hand ran up her side, feathering touches in its wake before settling on her breast again. “Maybe we order pizza... we don’t have to get out of bed to order pizza.”

Her breath hitched as his fingers found her nipples again. “Fine, but you’re going to have to stop doing that long enough for me to call.”

He chuckled and let her lean across him to grab her phone off the nightstand. Once she had hold of it he gripped her hips and shifted her so she straddled him, smiling when his hands came to rest on her hips.

Katherine rolled her eyes and called the number she found for a pizza place. “Hi, yes... delivery.” Rafael lifted his hips while she rambled off her address, smiling at the look she gave him. “Um yes, two mediums. Do you have feta? Fantastic, yes feta and black olives on half and pineapple on the other half of one, and... what do you want?” She asked making eye contact with him as she smacked his hand away from her breast.

“Do that have a meat lovers?” He smirked.

Katherine repeated the question and then listed the different meats their version had on it.

“That’ll work.” She said once he nodded to the selection. “Twenty minutes.” This was repeated mostly for Rafael’s benefit as his hands were cupping her breast again. “Great, thanks.” Katherine hung up and leaned into his touch.

“Pineapple?” He grinned as he rolled her nipples between his thumb and forefinger.

“You have twenty minutes... do you want to tease me about my toppings choice now or later?”

“Later.” He smirked, rolling her beneath him again.

 

Katherine had two bags slung over her shoulder as she entered the building at the same time as Amanda.

“No Barba tonight?” Amanda smiled.

“Too much grading and I’d like to salvage some of my weekend.”

“He’s also busy...”

“Yeah... How are you doing? Rafael mentioned Patton’s who he’s prosecuting.” They both climbed the stairs, neither in a much of a rush.

“Deputy Chief Patton...” Amanda sighed.

“I know you weren’t happy when you left Atlanta, but what happened?”

“My sister happened.”

“Kim?”

“It was the first time she got in trouble for something really serious... I made a choice to help her.” Amanda shrugged.

“Amanda...”

Katherine gave her a look similar to those she had been receiving from everyone she worked with and it was more than Amanda could take. “I’m fine.”

“Do you want to talk?” Katherine asked as they reached Amanda’s floor.

“Not really.” Amanda quickly made it to her door and slipped inside.

Katherine continued up to her apartment, setting her bags on the couch and warming up the last of her leftover pizza.

“Drinks when you’re ready.” She texted Amanda before settling on her couch to grade. She didn’t expect a response. That’s not how Amanda functioned. It was just a reminder that she was there, and Katherine knew from years of sharing an apartment with Amanda that she needed time to work through things a bit before she’d talk and even then she wouldn’t get that much out of her.

 

“I’m really glad you ended up coming by last night.” Katherine smiled, cuddling closer to Rafael when her alarm went off.

“If I’m being completely honest I had an ulterior motive.” He said wrapping his arms around her.

“I have to shower if I’m going to beat the other teachers to the copy machine.” Katherine grumbled, reluctantly climbing out of bed and starting the coffee maker on her way to shower. She had just finished washing her hair when she heard the bathroom door open. “Have you already forgotten how tiny my shower is?”

“No,” Rafael chuckled, “I was hoping you knew what time Rollins went for her morning run.”

Katherine poked her head out of the shower. “What are you wearing?”

“It’s cold and... what’s wrong with what I’m wearing?”

“Your shoes match your shirt and jacket.” Katherine chuckled.

“Do you know what time she runs or not?”

“Around seven. That’s why you came over last night... so you could stalk my friend? I thought you wanted sex.” She was still giggling, but had returned to her shower.

“It was my ulterior motive, yes, I don’t need an excuse for the other.”

“No you don’t... Is the coffee ready?”

“Yes, you want me to pour you a cup?”

“Yeah. I’ll be out in a minute.”

Rafael exited the bathroom, fixing them both a cup of coffee and handing hers to her when she exited in only her towel.

“What time do you have to leave?”

“Six fifteen, six thirty. I really need to use the copier before school today.” Katherine sighed.

“Oh... hmm...”

“Here,” she smiled pulling a key from her kitchen drawer and handing it to him, “you can stay here until you’re ready to run after Amanda. Hell, you can keep the key.”

“You’re giving me a key to your place?” He asked following her to her bedroom.

“Why not?” Katherine shrugged, digging an outfit out of her closet.

“You want a key to mine?”

“That’s up to you.” She gave him a quick kiss then started to change for work.

“I’ll get you a key.” He said, watching her.

“I’m not giving you a key to obligate you to give me one. I just don’t really need it back... Amanda already has a spare.”

“Amanda can enter your apartment whenever she wants?”

“Unless I’m home and I have the top deadbolt locked.” Katherine chuckled while pulling her hairdryer out from the bin she stored it in.

“Next time I leave you to sleep in at my apartment you can keep the key.” He smirked.

“Oh, ok.” She smiled and rolled her eyes, the sound of the hairdryer drowning out anything else he attempted to say.

 

“What are the chances the judge will even allow my testimony?” Amanda grumbled after using her fingers to tap dry the tears that had formed while prepping for trial with Rafael.

“It’s a long shot.”

Amanda nodded and took a breath, trying to ignore the look on his face. Though she was relieved to see it was different than the looks Liv, Nick, and Fin had been giving her... he seemed angry, not at her, but that someone had hurt her. “Barba?”

“Yes?”

“You’re next question?” She gave him a nudging look.

“Right...” Rafael nodded, continuing with his line of questioning, trying to push back any reaction to her answers. He was pretty sure her earlier statement, the one that has paused their back and forth, was the first time she had said Patton had raped her out loud. Possibly the first time she had ever admitted what had happened to herself. They had all speculated, but actually hearing her say it was different. He was now more determined, and not just because Amanda was Katherine’s friend, but because no matter how much they like to ride on the others nerves, he considered her a friend long before Katherine had appeared in his life.

“Is that everything?” Amanda asked as she stood from the witness box.

“It is.”

“Ok...” Amanda started for the door, then turned, “Barba... don’t tell Kate.”

He didn’t say anything for a moment. He didn’t feel it was his place to say anything, but he also didn’t want to be in a position to keep something from her either.

“I just mean... let me tell her.” Amanda exhaled.

Rafael nodded.

Amanda turned to the door and then paused again. “Oh and if I end up not testifying can we keep my testimony between us? I’ll tell Liv, but maybe leave things vague with everyone else.”

“We can.”

“Thanks.” She said giving him a halfhearted smile before heading to the door again.

“Amanda...”

She looked back at him.

“I will do everything I can...”

“I know you will, you always do. He’s still Patton though...” Amanda shrugged and exited the courtroom.

 

Katherine had just gotten home from work and was rummaging through her fridge for something to eat when her phone buzzed.

“I’ll take that drink know.”

“Where?” Katherine texted back.

“That little bar down the street that has the really good grilled cheese.”

Katherine quickly changed into her jeans and a cute shirt and joined Amanda at a booth in the bar she had mentioned.

“I assumed you were hungry so I already ordered for you.” Amanda said as Katherine sat down.

“Thanks. What’s going on?”

“Patton’s why I left Atlanta.”

“He did assault you then?” Katherine asked.

“Yeah... kind of. It didn’t start that way... I agreed to help Kim... but he was aggressive and then...”

“You tried to stop him.”

“Yeah... and he didn’t.”

“Jeez Amanda. I had heard rumors and I knew there were more to them than what was said, but...” Katherine exhaled, “I’m sorry.”

“I figured you had. Sam and Scott pretty much grew up together...”

“Yeah, but I know you... and Sam’s a bigger ass than Scott.” Katherine huffed.

“You didn’t believe him?”

“Of course not.”

“Barba knows...”

“I have all the details I need.” Katherine assured her.

“Thank you.”

“How’s Nick been?”

“Extra supportive. He keeps calling to check in on me.” Amanda grumbled.

“That’s just terrible.” Katherine smiled.

“You know how I like to process things.”

“If you mean by not processing them at all, then yes I know how you process things.”

Amanda chuckled and threw a fry from the plate the waitress was sitting down at Katherine.

“She has anger issues.” Katherine chuckled when the waitress gave them a look.

“Hey could you do me a favor?”

“Depends...”

Amanda rolled her eyes. “Can you watch Frannie for a couple weeks?”

“I can. Where are you going?”

“I’m not exactly sure yet, I just need to get away for a bit.”

 

The weekend finally arrived and Katherine had spent most of Saturday in her apartment grading while while Rafael finished up paperwork from the trial.

“Meet me at my place? We can order in.” Rafael texted around six.

“Sure. I’ll head that way in twenty minutes.”

Katherine gathered some clothes for the next day and a few creature comforts for Frannie, tossing them all in a bag and hailed a cab to Rafael’s.

“What’s that?” He huffed when he opened the door to find her and Frannie standing there.

“Frannie.” Katherine smiled.

He stood motionless, clearly unsure of how to proceed.

“Amanda’s dog... that I’m keeping while she’s in Costa Rica.”

“Is she housebroken?”

“Frannie is very well trained, aren’t you Frannie.” Katherine had lowered herself to Frannie’s level and was scratching behind her ears.

“Where does she... do her business?”

“We’ll have to take her for a walk a little later and in the morning.”

“She’s sleeping here?” His voice went higher than she’d expected.

“If you want me to.” Katherine chuckled, walking Frannie passed Rafael who was still standing in his doorway.

To Rafael’s dismay, Frannie hopped up on his couch and made herself comfortable.

Katherine pulled him closer to her and pressed her lips to his. “It’s one night.”

“It’s two weeks.” Rafael huffed.

“We can stay at my place until Amanda gets back.” Katherine smiled, kissing him again.

His eyes peaked over at the dog that had curled into a ball, but didn’t pull his lips from hers.

“What did you want for dinner?” Katherine purred, walking him backwards toward his room.

“Chinese ok?” He panted between kisses as Katherine unbuttoned his shirt.

“Sure.” Katherine smiled tugging his pants tighter to unfasten them.

“You’re sure the dog wont damage something?”

Katherine tugged her sweater over her head and moved closer to him, slipping her bra off as his hands ran up her sides. “Still want to talk about Frannie?”

“Frannie who?” He smirked, pulling her onto his bed.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Episode Reference: Season 16, Episode 12

 

Katherine had just taken Frannie for a walk and they were both back in her apartment, Frannie on the couch and Katherine in the kitchen. Rafael had accepted the dog would be there but made it clear he preferred that Frannie stayed at her place... especially after he spent an afternoon removing dog hair from various surfaces in his apartment, including the leg of his favorite slacks.

“When is Rollins coming back to pick up her mutt.” Rafael snapped when Frannie greeted him by jumping on him as soon as he entered Katherines apartment.

Katherine tensed at his tone, but didn’t respond. Instead she slowly started stirring the sauce she was working on again. She really hadn’t thought he’d be annoyed by Frannie when she had agreed to keep her. In fact, he really hadn’t seemed that annoyed before now. Sure he had asked that they stay at her place until Frannie was back home, but even when he had made the suggestion he had been sweet about it. He had even started giving Frannie belly rubs and ear scratches once he was out of work clothes and they were all cuddle on her couch. That’s the reason Frannie was so excited to see him, otherwise she would have just lifted her head and watched him from the couch.

Rafael sighed and squatted to pet Frannie when she settled. “I’m sorry it’s not you... but you could try not to jump on my suits.”

Katherine smiled and her body relax as she watched him quietly apologize to Frannie for snapping at her.

“You know,” he smiled, moving closer to Katherine, “when I’m being an ass you can snap back.” Rafael wrapped his arms around her waist and rested his chin on her shoulder to see what she was cooking.

“With something like... Sunday, when her plane lands.” Katherine smiled trying to sound cross when she said the response that had initially gone through head, knowing he knew when Amanda’s flight got in.

“Exactly.” Rafael smirked, kissing her neck.

“Why did you snap at her?”

“It’s been a long day... I hate this case.”

“How’s Nick doing?” Katherine asked, pulling a baking pan with English muffins that had been toasted on it from the oven, placing Canadian bacon and poached eggs on them and setting them back in the oven while she finished the Hollandaise sauce.

“Not so great... it didn’t help that I left him with a terrible choice to make. Testify and risk alienated his mom and sister, or don’t testify and his father gets away with fracturing his fiancés skull.” Rafael sighed and pulled away from her.

“Are you ok?”

“I’m taking this one more personally than I should.”

“Because of your father?”

“Yeah... What made you make Eggs Benedict?” He asked changing the subject.

“Because you like it and you’re stressed.”

“You know I love you right?” He smirked, wrapping her in his arms again.

“I believe you’ve mentioned it,” Katherine chuckled, “but the sauce will break if I don’t finish this up soon.”

Rafael grabbed two dishes and Katherine plated the food, ladling the sauce on top.

“Can you grab the ketchup?” She asked as she pulled breakfast potatoes from the oven and plated them as well.

“If you cook like this too often I’m going to weight five hundred pounds.” Rafael chuckled after a few bites.

Katherine laughed and rolled her eyes. “I would blame your incessant snacking at work before the occasional meal I cook.”

“How do you know how often I have a snack at work?”

“Amanda mentioned they restock the pretzels weekly just for you... literally no one else eats them.” Katherine laughed.

“That can’t be...” His mind went to the tub of pretzels he ate a handful of before heading to her place... and how little was left in it when he knew it was full on Monday.

“Did you want to talk about it?”

“My incessant snacking?” He smirked.

“No... the case, your dad?”

“Not really.”

“Ok. If you change your mind...”

“You’ll be there.” He smiled.

 

Katherine opened the door when Amanda knocked, barely moving out of the way in time as Amanda pushed passed her to greet Frannie.

“Oh hi Amanda, why yes she was very good...” Katherine teased over Amanda’s coddling and praising of Frannie.

“Sorry.” Amanda smiled. “So she was good.”

“She was perfect, even Rafael warmed up to her.”

“They didn’t do anything inappropriate in front of you?” Amanda asked Frannie, giving her a scratch behind her ear.

“Rafael made sure we shut the door.” Katherine chuckled.

“Seriously, no visuals Kate.” Amanda scolded.

“Do you want to grab dinner? I found a great little restaurant with a patio that allows Frannie to sit with me.”

“It’s forty degrees.”

“They have heaters. If you want to sit inside we can leave Frannie here or at your place.” Katherine shrugged.

“Does it feel like it’s seventy under the heaters?” Amanda smirked.

“I take it we’re leaving Frannie here?” Katherine chuckled.

 

Katherine and Amanda were seated in a booth not far from the entrance, but just far enough that the cold air didn’t hit them when the door opened.

“How was Costa Rica?”

“Warm.” Amanda smiled. “It didn't drop below seventy once.”

“No wonder you didn’t want to sit in the cold.” Katherine chuckled.

“It was really great to get away for a bit. Decompress. I never really dealt with everything from before.”

“You don’t say.” Katherine chuckled.

“Shut up, what about you?”

“What about me?”

“All that shit with Scott.” Amanda stated accusingly.

“I’m dealing with it.”

“Really? You don’t talk to me and I know you don’t talk to your mom.”

“I talk to Rafael when something comes up.” Katherine muttered while shifting in her seat.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I did.”

“No, I mean before it got to the point of fleeing to New York to get away from him. I’m one of your closest friends.”

“I didn’t talk to anyone about it. I was embarrassed.” Katherine shrugged.

“You had no reason to be embarrassed.”

“You remember the week before my wedding? How itchy I was?”

Amanda nodded.

“I kept telling people it was just some weird nerves thing, but even then I knew things weren’t right and I married him anyway. It was stupid, but I had it in my head that I had to or I’d be letting everyone down... my family, his family. The wedding was mostly paid for at that point. Invitations had been sent out, RSVP’s made... and I kept second guessing my own judgement on things, questioning whether the doubts I was having were real or just cold feet.”

“Still, it only took you three years to leave.” Amanda grinned.

Katherine chunked a piece of bread at her. “And you wonder why I don’t tell you things.”

“I’m kidding. I’m glad you left his sorry ass. You’re one of my more grounded friends, I’d hate to see how much of an effect he’d have on someone less stable... someone like me.”

“You’re way more hard headed than I am... you and Scott wouldn’t have lasted a week.” Katherine chuckled. “Besides, after what you grew up with, he’d have flipped a chair over in anger once and you’d have pinned him to the ground telling him you’d take him in yourself if he ever pulled something like that again.”

“He threw a chair?”

“Not so much threw it as flipped it. It still startled me, but he walked out right after so I wasn’t concerned at the time.”

“Did he ever hit you?”

“No. I thought he might a few times, but he never did. I just got to the point that I felt like I was walking on eggshells. Constantly thinking my actions through, not in a logical way, but in a how will Scott react to this way. I couldn’t live like that anymore.” Katherine shrugged.

“Did you talk to anyone?”

“No. Scott made me feel like I was the crazy one. He could start a fight and somehow the whole thing would be my fault. I don’t think I’ve ever heard him utter an I’m sorry.” Katherine huffed. “Besides, anytime I’d make plans to hang out with someone he’d find some work thing or dinner with his friends that we needed to attend. If I just went out with someone after work without telling him ahead of time, he’d make me feel like shit about it... I stopped even trying after a while.”

“You want me to kick his ass?” Amanda smiled.

“Yes.” Katherine chuckled.

“Seriously though, if Barba doesn’t treat you right...”

“You’ll be the first to know.” Katherine smiled.

“How’s Nick doing?” Amanda asked while pushing food around her plate.

“I don’t really know Nick.”

“Barba hasn’t mentioned anything?”

“He said they lost in court, but he didn’t mention how Nick took it. Why don’t you call him?”

“I tried. He’s not in the mood to talk.” Amanda sighed.

“Maybe you two are a little too alike...” Katherine chuckled.

“Laugh it up and see if I listen to you when you need to vent about Barba.” Amanda smirked.

“Rafael’s been great.”

“He’s still Barba and he’s got a arrogant, pompous, stubborn streak... he’ll irritate you one day.”

“I can see why you’d say that, but he’s never been that way towards me.”

“I hate how happy you two are.” Rollins grumbled.

“No you don’t.” Katherine grinned.

 

“Raf...” Katherine tried to interject between kisses as he walked her to his bedroom.

Rafael pressed his lips to hers again, effectively silencing her and unfastened her pants.

“You did at least lock the door?” She chuckled when he pulled her shirt off and his kisses moved to her neck.

“I did.” His hand tugged her hair back and his lips found hers again. His free hand unclasped her bra and Katherine let it slip to the floor, her own hands running up his chest, unfastening buttons in their wake.

She slid her hands under his shirt, just below his suspenders, pushing both off his shoulders, her hands dropping with the shirt as they found the clasp of his slacks. Rafael groaned when she slid her hand inside, desperately wanting more contact as she lightly stroked along his length.

“More?” Katherine panted as he kissed down her neck.

“Me or you?” He asked, pausing just above her nipple.

“You.” She smiled glancing down at him and entangling the hand not currently stroking him into his hair.

Rafael smirked, pushing himself harder against her hand and engulfed the nipple. Her breath hitched as she tugged his hair and increased the hold she had on him, stroking firmly. Katherine tugged him back to her lips and walked him toward his bed, only releasing him long enough to lower his slacks and underwear. She then took him in her hand again and dropped to her knees.

“That’s not fair.” He puffed out when she looked up at him and licked her bottom lip.

“No... what wouldn’t be fair is if I had no intention of following through.” Katherine smirked.

The corners of his lips tugged up as she moved closer to him, her tongue running up his shaft and the flicking against his tip, her lips encompassing his head moments later.

“Yeah... no, this is way more than fair.” Rafael breathed, his hand resting in her hair as she began to bob. He tugged his shirt off and returned his hand to her head, watching her below him, pleasuring him in only her red panties.

Rafael gripped her hair so that she couldn’t move her head. “Relax your throat.” He said, his eyes locking with hers. Katherine nodded and moved her hands to his thighs, breathing through her nose as he pushed almost all of him into her, pulling out and then pushing in again. He continued until he could barely hold on and then pulled out completely and brought her to his lips. “That was ok?” He panted, his forehead resting against hers.

“I enjoy doing things for you.” Katherine smiled, kissing him again while keeping the second part of her thought to herself... _you return the favor..._

“As do I.” He smirked, pushing her back on the bed and tugging the panties off.

He crawled on the bed so the he hovered above her apex. Katherine glanced down and he smiled at her, then lowered himself and licked the length of her slit, probing with his fingers as his tongue focused on her nub.

“Fuck, Raf...” She panted, gripping his hair again. He was really good at this, so good that she’d probably let him do anything he wanted to her as long as this was her reward... she wouldn’t tell him that though.

His tongue flicked against her as he suckled her clit. Her breathing was erratic and her hips pushed against him as her back arched off the bed. Rafael curled the fingers he had inside her and she moaned loudly as her body jerked, trying to pull away. He held her in place and continued his torment until a raspy groan escaped her and she pushed at his head. He glanced up at her, smiling mischievously when her eyes met his.

“What are you doing?” Katherine panted while trying to sound scolding.

Rafael smirked, lightly licking her clit again and her whole body twitched in response.

Katherine shifted so she could close her legs while ignoring his chuckle as he crawled up beside her.

“Just for that I shouldn’t let you finish.”

“You enjoyed it... maybe not as much as I did, but you still enjoyed it.” Rafael grinned pulling her beneath him as he moved between her legs.

“You’re too cocky for your own good.” Katherine chuckled.

“Cocky, huh?” He smirked while playfully rubbing himself on her.

“And now you’re twelve.” She laughed.

Rafael chuckled and pressed his lips to hers, wrapping his arms tightly around her as he eased inside her.

 

“Katherine...” Rafael breathed as they laid intertwined in each others limbs.

“Yes.”

He was silent... chickening out of what he wanted to ask her.

“Rafael?” Katherine questioned, furrowing her brow as she shifted to look at him.

He exhaled and closed his eyes. “Have you considered the possibility of living together?”

Katherine tensed and Rafael took a breath and began to back track. “Never mind... it’s way too soon.”

“I’ve thought about it. I love sleeping next to you... waking next to you... hell we sleep either at your place or mine pretty much every night as it is... it’s just...”

“Too soon.” Rafael finished for her.

“Please don’t take that to mean I don’t want to, or that I won’t one day... I’m just a little skittish about moving too quickly, and we haven’t even been dating a year yet.” Katherine sighed.

“So I should hide the ring I bought you.” Rafael chuckled.

“Don’t even tease.” Katherine giggled, lightly slapping his chest.

“You love me?”

“More than anything.” Katherine smiled.

“Stay here then.” He smiled and climbed out of bed.

“Where are you going?”

“Just stay in bed,” he smirked, “I’ll be right back.”

Katherine pulled the covers over herself as Rafael made his way down the hall to his office. He slid the desk drawer open and pulled out the spare key, pausing as he glanced at the small ring box sitting next to it. He sighed and picked the box up, glancing at the round solitaire inside and then made his way to the office closet where his built in safe was. She wasn’t ready yet, but he knew she would be one day. He had never been so sure of anything before. He set the box in the safe and closed the door, turning to make his way back to Katherine.

“Here.” He smiled when he climbed in bed next to her.

“You’re giving me a key?”

“You may not be moving in, but you can come and go as you please.”

“You just want me to surprise you by being naked in your bed one day.” She chuckled.

“I do now.” He grinned, pulling her closer and kissing her.

 


	18. Chapter 18

 

“Ms. Morgan, it’s really starting to come down out there.” Diego, one of Katherines students said as he looked out the window.

Katherine, who wasn’t far from the student leaned over to look out the window as well. “That must be why they announced an early release.” She smiled, and shooed him back to his desk.

“You think noon is early enough?” Lauren asked.

“I’m sure it will be. Do you have to travel a long distance to get home?” Katherine questioned.

“No. My mom and I walk, it’s only a few blocks.”

“Then why are you so concerned about whether noon is soon enough?” Katherine chuckled.

“Other students have to travel further than me.” Lauren smiled and while Katherine was pretty sure that reason had just come to her student she returned her smile.

“Who’s Rafael?” River asked, holding up her phone.

“Jeez you kids are nosy.” Katherine smirked, taking the phone from River.

Normally she wouldn’t answer her phone in the middle of class, but with the weather she decided to make an exception.

“Hey Raf.” She answered, chuckling when her class filled the room with an ooooh sound.

“Is that your class.” He questioned, chuckling as well.

“Yes and they’re about to get a snow related science assignment to complete while schools cancelled.” Her class quickly quieted down and returned to the classwork they were working on.

“School is cancelled then?”

“At least for tomorrow, we’re dismissing at noon. I’ll get a little work done once my students are picked up and head home after that.” Katherine said, glancing at how messy her room had gotten over the last few weeks. She could barely even see her desk anymore.

“Courts been postponed as well, and my car service quit running thirty minutes ago.”

“Is it that bad out there?” Katherine moved to look out the window again.

“It is.”

“Ms. Morgan.” The secretary called through the intercom.

“Yes.”

“Can you send Cassie down. Her mother is here.”

“Sure. Cassie, clean up your desk before you get your backpack, oh and don’t forget...”

“My discipline folder... I know.” Cassie muttered.

“If it’s not signed when you get back I will call your mom.”

“I’ll get her to sign it.”

“And Cassie...”

“Yes.” Cassie grumbled.

“Have a little fun on your snow day.” Katherine smiled.

Cassie smiled and gave her a hug on her way to grab her backpack.

“Can I go to your place after I leave here? If the roads are that bad I don’t want to risk a cab to mine.” Rafael’s voice drew her back to the phone.

“That’s fine. If you beat me there, use your key.”

“Can I go to the restroom?” MJ asked.

“Go quickly, we’re getting ready to pack up in five minutes.”

“I can wait.” MJ muttered.

“MJ go to the restroom, just don’t stop and wave to Ms. Winter’s class on the way.” Katherine chuckled.

“MJ?” Rafael questioned.

“Mary Jane,” Katherine smiled, “Oh and Rafael, be careful.”

“I will. You need me to pick anything up from that little bodega around the corner from your building?”

“Do you know how to make a...” Katherine glanced around the room at all the little pairs of eyes watching her.

“A what?”

“Uh... hmmm... I can’t exactly say right now...”

“A martini?” Rafael chuckled.

“Yes.”

“I bartended in college, I think I can handle it. I meant food though.”

“Maybe grab a couple frozen pizza’s in case we’re stuck longer than we think, other than that I went shopping yesterday.”

“Ok. I’ll see you in a bit. Love you.” Rafael smiled.

“Love you too.” Katherine replied, almost immediately regretting it when her students showed their maturity... or lack there of.

“I’ll let you get back to work.” Rafael laughed.

“Thanks.” Katherine grumbled.

“Ms. Morgan, was that your boyfriend?” Diego asked.

Katherine smirked and shook her head while patting the boy on the head. “Finish your work, Diego.”

 

Katherine waited with her students in the normal spot for fourth grade dismissal. One by one her students were picked up, most fairly quickly. It’s seemed the whole city was trying to get home. Katherine glanced at her watch... twelve twenty.

“Do you think your mom is stuck at work?” Katherine asked, turning to MJ, her only student left.

“Possibly.” MJ shrugged.

“Go to the office and call, I’ll get you checked in with Mrs. Andrews in the Library.”

Katherine watched as MJ made her way to the office, making her own way to the library once the student made it across the threshold.

“How many?” Mrs. Andrews asked.

“Just one, MJ... she’s trying to get a hold of her mom now.” Katherine sighed, writing MJ’s full name down on the sign in sheet for late parent pick up.

“Are you surprised?” Mrs. Andrews scoffed, “I’ve spent more afternoons with MJ over the last four years than her mother actually has... the office called her mom multiple times since she never picks her up on time. I doubt MJ will fair better.”

“I’m sure it’s hard being a single mom.”

“That’s not that woman’s problem... have you met her?”

“No. She’s my one parent who never returned any of my calls for the beginning of the year parent teacher conferences... Mrs. Davis told me not to worry about it.” Katherine sighed. MJ had been a student at the school since first grade and her mother had apparently never made an effort to meet with any of her teachers... in fact it seemed she made an effort not to.

“I’m not surprised...” Mrs. Andrews muttered, her expression quickly shifting to a smile when MJ approached. “Looks like it’s just you and me today,” she gestured to a table with board games, “Checkers, Connect Four, or Boggle?”

“Boggle.” MJ smiled.

“If I don’t see you before you leave, have a nice snow day.” Katherine smiled, giving MJ a side hug.

“You too, Ms. Morgan.”

Katherine ventured back upstairs to her classroom and started organizing it. Most everything was ready for whenever they got back so she was taking the opportunity to make it look less like twenty something nine and ten year olds spent eight hours there everyday. That, and less like a busy teacher just piled things on her desk.

Her desk was the first space she tackled. She filed old worksheets, moved a couple stacks that needed to be graded to the bag she used to take work home in, and then started making a small stack of papers that would be handed out for student work the next school day, ordering them so the morning work was on top.

“Crap...” She mumbled, realizing she only had enough copies of the science lab’s student answer page for her morning class.

Hoping the copier wasn’t being used, she hurried downstairs to make enough for her afternoon class.

“Hey Ms. Morgan.”

“MJ... you’re still here?” Katherine paused and glanced at Mrs. Andrews and then back at the student.

“Yeah.... I don’t thing my mom has checked her phone.” MJ sighed.

Katherine looked back at Mrs. Andrews, not quite sure how long they were supposed to wait on MJ’s mom if the weather was as bad as it seemed to be.

“I still have to take the train across town.” Mrs. Andrews said, trying her best not to sound annoyed.

“I can walk. My apartment is only five blocks and I have a key.” MJ offered.

“Your mom hasn’t signed a consent for you to walk.” Mrs. Andrews sighed.

Katherine pushed up her bottom lip and continued to the copier, pleasantly surprised to find it unoccupied. She made her copies and then headed back to her room, pausing as she passed MJ again.

Katherine motioned for Mrs. Andrews to join her where MJ couldn’t hear. “Can I walk her home?”

“Ask Mrs. Davis what she thinks. We need to get home too, we can’t sit around waiting for Amber Stacker figure out she needs to pick up her daughter... I’m mean she barely makes it on a good day.” Mrs. Andrews grumbled.

Katherine hurried to the principal’s office to ask Mrs. Davis what she thought, dropping her copies off in her room and grabbing her winter coat once she got the go ahead.

“I can walk MJ home.” Katherine smiled at a relieved looking Mrs. Andrews and offered her hand to MJ.

“Thank you.” Mrs. Andrews said, gathering her things to leave.

“Five blocks?” Katherine asked MJ.

“Four and a half really.” MJ smiled.

 

“Do you like snow?” Katherine asked as the rounded the corner MJ’s apartment building was on.

“Not really... maybe if it wasn’t so cold when it snowed. Our apartment isn’t very well insulated.” MJ shrugged.

“Insulated, huh?” Katherine smiled. It had been one of their science vocabulary words a few weeks back.

“I listen.” MJ grinned.

“When you want to.” Katherine chuckled. Truthfully, she did know MJ listened... to lecture anyway. She had been one of her more challenging students behaviorally, but academically MJ excelled.

“I’ve got it from here, Ms. Morgan.” MJ said as they reached her building.

“I have to make sure you get inside. I’m responsible for you right now.”

MJ nodded and reluctantly used her key to open the main door to the building. Katherine had hoped to feel some warmth, but the halls of the building were only a few degrees warmer than outside.

Halfway up the sixth set of stairs MJ paused. “Ms. Morgan... please wait here for me to get inside.”

“MJ, I...”

“That’s my apartment.” MJ interrupted, pointing to a door Katherine could see from where she stood, but it would be hard to see her from the door due to her being between two floors and the banister leading to the next set of stairs. “You can see that I get inside from here. Please don’t come to the door with me, my mom will be worse if you’re with me.”

Katherine furrowed her brow. “Parents are usually better behaved when other adults are around.”

“She’ll be worse after you leave.” MJ exhaled.

Katherine looked at her student. The slightly dirty clothes, the messy hair that was always thrown in a ponytail, the small bruises she had attributed to MJ’s somewhat rambunctious behavior... all screaming something different now.

“Please stay here until I’m inside.” MJ pleaded.

“Ok,” Katherine nodded, “I’ll watch from here.”

“Thank you.” MJ exhaled, giving her one last hug before making her way to the door.

Katherine watched as MJ knocked on the door, curious to why she didn’t just use her key.

“What are you doing home?” A rather rough looking woman barked as she tightened her robe after opening the door.

“School let out early. They’re predicting a blizzard.” MJ replied.

“Well that’s just great... Is that coffee shop open?”

“They were closing when I walked by.”

“Damnit.” Amber grumbled.

“I can wait out here.” MJ offered.

“So that bitch down the hall can call DCS again... no.” Amber crouched lower and got in her daughters face. “You can wait in the coat closet until my friend leaves. He better not see or hear you.” MJ’s mom gripped her arm and squeezed until MJ faced her. “Is that clear?”

“You won’t know I’m there.” MJ whispered.

MJ let out a little yelp as Amber yanked her inside, the door slamming shut behind them.

Katherine sat on the steps for a moment, making a note of the apartment number and street address before starting the walk back to school. Once inside she made a call she had had to make more times than she wished she had over her career.

 

Katherine was halfway home when her phone rang. “Hey Raf.”

“You really should leave if you haven’t, the news is reporting low visibility.”

“Their not wrong... I’m almost home though.”

She quickly made it up the stairs and into her apartment to find Rafael sitting on her couch a scotch in one hand and case file in the other.

“Were you the only person left at work?” Rafael smirked when she sat down beside him.

“I was. Is that for me?” Katherine asked, noticing the martini sitting on her coffee table.

“It is, I made it after I called you.”

Katherine exhaled and downed the drink. “Mind making me another one?”

“Everything ok?” He asked, moving to her kitchen to make her another martini.

“I had to call DCS today... for one of my favorite students.” Katherine sighed.

“Why?” He handed her the second drink and pulled her into his side on the couch.

“My student, MJ, she’s always one of the last students picked up after school and today no one could get a hold of her mom. She lives five blocks from the school so I walked her home.”

“You shouldn’t have walked her home.” He scolded.

“I know that.” Katherine huffed, she didn’t need to be told that she took a risk walking her student home when she wasn’t technically authorized to do so. “Andrews still had to get across town, most everyone at the school has a longer commute than me and if we waited on MJ’s mom they’d all still be there. No harm came in me walking her.”

“Ok... so you called DCS?” Rafael said, half apologizing for his tone as he gestured for her to continue.

“MJ asked me to wait on the stairs for her to get inside. She told me her mom would be worse if I went to the door with her. She looked scared, so I stayed on the stairs. I could still see the door, but from the way the stairs were laid out you have to really look to see me and even then you’d only see my head. Her mom asked her why she was there and then told her to wait in the coat closet until her ‘friend’ left. She was barely dressed and it looked like she could have left a bruise on MJ’s arm where she gripped it.” Katherine sighed, taking a sip of her drink.

“Do you want me to ask SVU to look into it?”

“DCS said they’d investigate once the weather clears up enough they can send someone out. I’m not sure what I saw reaches the level of involving SVU.”

“You’re worried though...” Rafael said, taking a sip of his scotch.

“We had such a rough start to the year. MJ is really smart, but she pushes boundaries and doesn’t take to new adults easily. The only teacher she likes other than me is Mrs. Andrews and that’s because she’s been consistent after school care for four years. It took me most of last semester to connect with her, and now...,” Katherine exhaled, “she’s my favorite student. I know you’re not supposed to have a favorite and normally I don’t, but when you spend that much effort trying to reach someone and then you do... it impacts you. And I knew her home life wasn’t great, but I thought it was just a single mom working multiple jobs trying to provide for her kid. Maybe I just wanted to believe that. That, that’s why she was never on time to pick her up or her clothes were always a little dingy. I read MJ’s file and none of her previous teachers had ever mentioned anything other than her mother was hard to get in contact with...” Katherine paused and looked at Rafael, “yeah, I’m worried.”

“Keep an eye out while she’s in your class and if you notice something you want SVU involved with ask Rollins to check in on her.” Rafael suggested.

“I can do that.” Katherine relaxed slightly, feeling as though she had a bit more control of a situation she really had no control over... but MJ would be back in her class once the storm was over.

Rafael moved to her kitchen again and started searching through her cabinets and refrigerator, pulling out the items he wanted as he found them.

“What are you doing?” Katherine asked curiously.

“Making you dinner.”

“Good luck in my tiny kitchen.” She smiled.

“I’ve cooked in small kitchens before.” He smirked.

“Will there be enough for three?”

“Probably, why?” Rafael frowned, assuming she was thinking of inviting Amanda.

“Amanda is probably stuck in her apartment and she doesn’t always prepare for these kind of situations.”

“You mean you don’t think she shopped for food.” Rafael grumbled as Katherine gripped her doorknob.

“I’m going to check on her, go ahead and start. We can eat the leftovers if she doesn’t want to join us.” Katherine smiled and headed to the floor below.

She knocked on Amanda’s door and heard a bit of rustling before the door finally cracked open.

“Kate, hi.” Amanda said breathing heavily her clothing slightly disheveled.

“Am I interrupting something?” Katherine chuckled, noticing what looked like men’s shoes sitting on the floor by her couch.

“What did you need Kate?”

“I was just seeing if you had food.” Katherine said, trying to peek passed Amanda to see who was in her apartment.

“I have groceries.” Amanda huffed, closing the small gap in her door even more.

“Who do you have in there?”

“No one you know.” Katherine faked a pout and Amanda rolled her eyes, opening her door wider. “Kate, this is Declan. Declan, Kate.”

The slightly scruffy looking man was sitting on Amanda’s couch, his clothes looking just as disheveled as Amanda’s. “Hey.” He said, giving her an unenthusiastic wave.

“He seems nice.” Katherine said sarcastically, turning her attention back to Amanda.

“He’s a little rough around the edges.” Amanda shrugged.

“If you need anything...”

“I know you live upstairs.” Amanda replied, half pushing Katherine out of her apartment as she shut the door.

 

“No Rollins?” Rafael asked when she returned to her apartment alone.

“She apparently has food and is otherwise occupied.” Katherine said, moving closer to the kitchen.

“Nick?”

“Some scruffy looking guy named Declan.” Katherine shrugged.

“Lieutenant Declan Murphy?” Rafael lifted a brow, pausing his dicing of tomatoes to look at her.

“That guy’s a cop? I seriously thought she was about to be trapped in her apartment with some random loser she picked up at that dive bar.” Katherine said, sounding a bit relieved.

“He’s been undercover working with a sex trafficking ring for over half a year now.”

“He doesn’t always look like so seedy looking then?”

“He didn’t when he was in charge of SVU.”

“He used to be her boss?” She asked a bit more excitedly than she meant to.

“April and May of last year... don’t you two talk?” Rafael chuckled, returning to his food prep.

“We don’t really talk about work and Amanda gave me space last year. I needed that time to myself. I’m not sure that was always her intent, she had her own things... I didn’t even know her and Nick were sleeping together until that night you and I met again at the bar. I mean we hung out and talked then... just not about work.” Katherine shrugged, leaning against the small strip of counter by her stove. “What are you making?”

“Pasta Puttanesca.” He smiled.

“Italian?”

“It would seem so.” He smirked.

“That’s better than the boring spaghetti I was going to use those noodles for.”

“You have capers and kalamata olives and you were going to make boring spaghetti?” He chuckled.

“I was actually going to use those along with my artichokes hearts on a chicken breast.”

“Oh...” Rafael breathed looking at the half empty jars.

“I still have enough... at least now the jars will actually be finished off.” Katherine smiled.

“We work well together.” Rafael smirked, pulling her into the kitchen and into his arms.

“Even when we don’t mean to.” Katherine chuckled, pushing up to kiss him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was actually going to reference the episode Undercover Mother (S16 E15) but when I started writing this chapter it ended up falling slightly after that episode. Just know that episode took place in this particular storyline. I will change some things from the actual show, but the fact that Declan Murphy is Jesse’s dad is not one of the things I plan to change.


	19. Chapter 19

 

Katherine cuddled closer to Rafael, tugging the covers tighter around them as her legs intertwined with his.

“You remember when we said it was a shame we couldn’t just stay like this after we got home from Atlanta and no one knew we were back yet?”

“I do.” Rafael smiled.

“We were right.” She breathed, snuggling her head against his chest.

The blizzard had kept them secluded in her apartment for three days. Three days with absolutely no reason to leave her bed except to eat. Though they had watched a few movies while she got a bit of grading done.

“You aren’t experiencing cabin fever?” He chuckled.

“Not yet... ask me again in a couple days.” She smiled.

They continued to lay in each other’s arms, neither of them speaking, just enjoying being next to each other.

“I bet the snow looks pretty from your apartment.” Katherine sighed.

“It usually does.”

“If we lived there we could see it...”

“I do live there and there’s a reason I didn’t attempt to go home.” Rafael chuckled.

“True...”

“Are you thinking about living with me?”

“You put the idea in my head, and I really like this.” Katherine grinned, cuddling closer to him.

“I would like you to live with me.” Rafael lifted her chin so she’d look at him.

“Ok.”

“Ok?” His eyes widened, really not expecting her to agree to live with him so soon.

“Ok, but not yet.” She smiled giving him a quick kiss before climbing out of bed and grabbing her robe.

“Wait, what?” He questioned following her out of the room, slipping his underwear on as he went.

“This summer.” Katherine smiled as she set up the coffee maker.

“You want to move in with me this summer?”

“After school lets out.”

“Your lease should end around then, so that practical...” Rafael nodded.

Katherine pulled out the ingredients she need to make pancakes. “My lease ends in August.”

“I thought you moved to New York in June.”

“I did.” Katherine smiled, sifting the flour, baking powder, salt and sugar together.

“Then your lease should end in May.”

“The first year I signed a twelve month lease, the second I signed a fifteen month to ensure my rent wouldn’t increase for a few extra months.” Katherine shrugged.

“So when this summer?” Rafael smiled, moving closer to her and wrapping his arms around her waist.

“I was thinking once school lets out I could start packing and moving things over...” Katherine paused mid crack on the egg she was adding to the pancake mixture.

“What?”

“I want to keep some of my furniture... I don’t want to just move into your home.” She still hadn’t moved, her mind rethinking what she had just agreed to. His apartment was already his... filled with all of his things. It wasn’t that she didn’t like his furniture. She thought the design of his apartment was very tastefully done... it just felt too similar to when she had moved in with Scott... but Rafael wasn’t Scott.

“We can keep anything you want... all of it if you want to. It’ll be eclectic.” He smirked, taking the egg from her and dropping it’s insides in the bowl.

“Maybe not everything.” Katherine smiled, relaxing as she added in the rest of the wet ingredients.

“What would you like to keep?”

“I really like my couch, but your couch fits the space better... mine is tiny.”

“Yes, but my office could use a sitting area and your couch would fit nicely across from my desk, your coffee table would fit there too. Then you could grade across from me when I work at home.” He grinned handing her the whisk.

“My television and media console...” She smiled, thinking about how little work either of them would actually get done if it was anything like her attempts to grade papers and his roaming hands during the movies they had watched.

“The television could go in the guest room on the dresser and your media console could work in the entry area. You can store your purse and countless bags you carry back and forth to school in it.” Rafael smirked.

“The little sage table?” She gestured to it with her eyes as she mixed the pancake batter while fighting back a smile.

“That can live along the window in either the living room or my bedroom and we can drink coffee there on mornings we’re both home.”

“You have an answer for everything don’t you.” She chuckled.

“I’m afraid I don’t have any ideas for your bed.”

“Eh, it’s a cheap Ikea bed.” Katherine shrugged, turning to kiss him once the batter was smooth enough.

“Do you always cook from scratch.” Rafael asked watching her pour out the first pancake.

“I like to bake... not that making pancakes really counts as baking. But I like measuring out the ingredients and combining them... I find it calming now that there isn’t anyone here to point out every spec of flour on the counter.” She hadn’t sounded bitter, or relieved. It was just a statement, she honestly hadn’t even noticed the reference to Scott.

Rafael had though, and worried he may be pushing her to move more quickly than she wanted to. He started three times to speak... to ask her if she was sure about moving in with him. His mouth opening but no sounds escaping.

“Oh!” Katherine grinned, pulling out of his arms and handing him the spatula, “continue with the pancakes, I’ll be right back.”

She hurried to her bedroom and grabbed her phone from the nightstand.

Rafael flipped a pancake as she search for what she was looking for.

“Here.” She smiled handing him her phone and taking over the pancakes again.

“I assume I’m supposed to press play.” He chuckled.

Katherine rolled her eyes and pulled the pancake from the pan, pouring the next one. Rafael smiled at her and pressed play, watching four of her students on the screen as they said hello to him.

“Your kids wanted to say hi to me?” He asked furrowing his brow.

“Now that they know you exist you can expect more of that.” Katherine chuckled.

“Seems a little odd.”

“Have you met fourth graders? They are nothing but odd and they want to feel included in everything. They made me promise I’d show you and they will ask if I did first thing once their back in my class. Now I wont have to lie.”

“What are these four’s names?”

“Diego, River, Mia, and Jayden.” Katherine pointed to each student as she named them.

 

The weather had improved over the weekend and while snow still covered a lot of surfaces, roads had been plowed and sidewalks shoveled.

“I hate that you have to go home.” Katherine sighed, helping Rafael wrap his scarf around his neck.

It was Sunday evening and his car was waiting outside her building.

“If I had a clean suit here I’d stay.” He smiled, pulling her against him and kissing her. “You can come to my place tonight.”

“I could, but it going to be hard enough to get up tomorrow without being cuddle up next to you.”

“I love you.” Rafael smiled.

“I love you, too.” Katherine squeezed him tighter before pushing up to kiss him again. “Text or call when you get home so I know you made it safely.”

“I will.”

Katherine locked the door behind him, hating the fact that he had to leave. It was part of the reason she had decided to move in with him. She had never wanted to spend all of her free time with someone... not like she had him. She could spend the rest of her life worrying she would make another mistake or she could live... What if the mistake was not taking a chance on someone that had made her happier than she thought possible?

 

The walk to school was frigid, but Katherine had bundled up as best she could with a few bags over her shoulders.

“Morning Morgan.” Rachel the school’s secretary smiled when she signed in.

“Morning Rachel, how was your commute?”

“Not too bad. It’s amazing how quickly they clear the roads huh?” Rachel smiled.

“I’m sure we’ll still have a few parents blame the roads for their child being tardy today.”

Rachel rolled her eyes. “More than a few.”

Katherine chuckled and headed upstairs to her classroom.

“Morning MJ.” Katherine smiled at the child sitting next to her door as she unlocked it.

“Morning.” MJ muttered, standing and following her into the room.

“Everything ok?”

“Did you call DCS?” MJ asked, her hand absentmindedly rubbing her side.

“MJ, I had to.” Katherine sighed.

“No you didn’t. She gets so mad when they get involved. If you had just left it alone she would have ignored me, but instead...” MJ looked away and Katherine felt a stab of guilt.

“Did DCS talk with you?”

“They did, but I don’t tell them anything... mom says I’d be worse off if they took me.”

Katherine was silent, not knowing what to say. She had had foster students in her class and for every five fantastic foster parents she had encountered, there was that one abusing the system in some way. Mostly she saw the money meant for the kids being used on them instead while the student went without supplies or clothes that fit, but once one of the teachers she worked with had to make a report of sexual abuse... She couldn’t promise MJ that things would be ok if she trusted DCS, so she didn’t say anything at all.

“My mom thinks someone in our building called. She doesn’t know you walked me home... I won’t tell her.” MJ sighed sitting in the student closest to Katherines desk.

“You don’t have to lie for me.”

“Yes I do. She’s crazy and I wouldn’t want her to...”

“What did you mean by she gets mad when they get involved?” Katherine asked.

“You have to call don’t you? As a teacher... it’s a law or something?” MJ questioned, while avoiding Katherine’s.

“I’m legally required to, yes.”

“I’m going to go wait in the cafeteria with the other students.” MJ said, starting to stand.

“You can stay in here and read if you want.”

MJ glanced at the pillows Katherine had piled up in one corner for student use during work around the room times. “You don’t mind?”

“As long as you’re quiet and let me work you can come up here every morning if you want.”

“Ok.”

“You know I’m here if you need me?” Katherine said softly.

“I do.” MJ nodded, pulling her library book from her backpack and making herself comfortable in the pile of pillows.

 

Katherine met Rafael for dinner not far from her apartment. He would still have to return to work after dinner, the unexpected time off nearly doubling his work load.

“How was your work day?” He grumbled, sitting next to her in the booth.

“Not nearly as busy as yours.” She smiled.

“SVU picked up three new cases while we were snowed in. I mean who thinks to rape someone during a blizzard...”

“Maybe it’s that cabin fever thing?” Katherine shrugged.

“Don’t you dare say that close to a defense attorney.” He chuckled. “How’s your student?”

“They were good. I figured for more disruptions with the snow, but was pleasantly surprised.”

“I meant the one you called DCS on.”

“Oh... she asked if I was the one who called and implied that her mom would be confrontational if she knew.”

“Should you see if Rollins can take you to work for a while?” Rafael’s concern showing through in his voice.

“MJ said her mom thinks someone in their building called, she didn’t tell her I walked her home. I called again though.”

“Katherine...”

“I had to, she was rubbing her side like she was hurt. I needed to make sure they looked into it.” Katherine took a sip of water.

“Ok, but...”

“I will call every time I notice something. I care for my students welfare and I don’t have the option of letting the parents intimidate me out of calling... I’m a mandatory reporter, I could lose my teaching license if didn’t.” Katherine sighed.

Rafael put his arm around her tugging her closer. He knew that she had no choice, his mom was a principal, and even if she hadn’t been, he was a prosecutor... “I may have to move a few suits to your place until the semester ends.”

“I’m not going to argue with you sleeping over more often.” Katherine chuckled.

“We’ll get good use out of your place before the end of May.” Rafael smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was looking at the upcoming episodes in season 16 and the one that follows Undercover Mother is the one with Barba’s grandmother dying... I’m not killing her off in this story though. I really don’t reference a lot of episodes but still that’s a big one to just skip without mentioning it’s a change I’m making.


	20. Chapter 20

 

Every time Katherine asked how things were at home, MJ shrugged it off. “Same as always...” was her vague response. That didn’t stop Katherine from asking though. They had developed a small routine... MJ would be waiting by her door when she arrived at work, Katherine asked her how things were as she unlocked the door, and MJ shrugged off her question while making her way to the pillows to read.

Today had been no different.

“How do you get to school?” Katherine asked, watching MJ read from her desk.

“I walk.” MJ said, flipping the page in John Knowles, A Separate Peace.

“What causes you to get here so early then?”

“Oh... if I’m in the way I can read in the cafeteria. The noise doesn’t bother me.” MJ started to gather her things.

“That’s not what I meant. I like that you read in my room every morning. I just meant, why don’t you want to sleep in a bit longer or something?”

“I like leaving before my mom wakes up.” MJ shrugged.

“Who do you relate to, Phineas or Gene?”

“Who do you think?” MJ chuckled.

“Gene.” Katherine smiled.

The book MJ was reading was well above her grade level, but Katherine didn’t need to be her reading teacher to know she understood it.

“I just got an e-mail about donuts in the teachers lounge, what me to snag you one?” Katherine smirked.

MJ’s eyes widened as she nodded.

 

Katherine grabbed a donut and an orange juice the PTA had provided, and then checked her mailbox, pulling out various papers including the month of April’s lunch menu.

“Do you know MJ Stacker is in your room reading?” Ms. Nelson asked as she pulled the things from her own box.

“I do.” Katherine smiled.

“I wouldn’t leave her alone. When she was in my class I always caught her stealing things.” Ms. Nelson huffed.

“Oh, ok.” Katherine gathered her things and headed back to her room. She wasn’t worried about MJ taking anything, and she wasn’t going to engage in a conversation about her past behaviors. MJ had been most teachers dreaded student every year, she wouldn’t fault Nelson for the warning, but Katherine had a different relationship with her.

“Here.”

“Am I taking the donut meant for you?” MJ asked, hesitating on excepting it.

“The donut I wasn’t going to eat.” Katherine smiled, extending the food closer to her student.

“You sure?”

“I had eggs, fruit, and about six cups of coffee this morning before I left my apartment,” Katherine chuckled, “I’m not even close to hungry.”

MJ took the donut and moved to her desk to eat. “Ms. Morgan?”

“Yeah?”

“How do you get to school in the morning?” MJ asked, a mouthful of donut.

“I walk.”

“So you don’t live far?”

“About the same distance as you, but in the opposite direction.” Katherine replied, shifting a few things around on her desk to get ready for her morning class.

MJ noticed and gathered the things she’d need to take with her to Ms. Winters room, using one hand while she finished the donut with the other.

 

Katherine smiled when she felt Rafael’s arms tighten around her and his lips press against the back of her shoulder. She hadn’t been awake long, but also hadn’t wanted to disrupt the spooning position they were in, the same one they had fallen asleep in. Early in the relationship, Katherine would have worried she was giving off too much heat or that she was making Rafael uncomfortable in some other way... but not anymore. The thought never crossed her mind, he never gave her a reason for it to.

“How long have you been awake?” She didn’t turn to face him, merely smiled larger as she inched her back flush against his chest.

“I was going to ask you the same question.” He smirked.

“Not long.” Katherine turned her head so she could see him.

“Me either.” He hummed, pressing his lips to hers, his hands lightly grazing her skin on their path to her breast.

They were still spooning, their tongues dancing as his fingers toyed with her nipples. Katherine ran her hand between them where she could feel him pressing against her back, slowly stroking, moaning softly when one of his hands slid down her torso, settling between her legs.

“What did you have planned for today?” Rafael hummed against her ear as he lightly swirled her clit with his fingers.

Katherine closed her eyes and arched against his chest. “No plans...” She breathed.

Rafael smiled at her reaction, the effort needed to speak two words. “None?”

“Uh huh...” Katherine replied, her eyes still closed as she shook her head.

“Not even grading?”

“Rafael...” She panted, opening her eyes and reaching the hand not stoking him into his hair and pulling him to her lips so he’d stop asking her questions.

He shifted lower while Katherine lined him up with her entrance, gently pushing into her as her hand move to replace the one she had in his hair, her leg draping over his allowing him more access to her.

“Fuck Raf.” She moaned, breaking their kiss when her body jerked against his touch.

Rafael applied more pressure to her nipple, squeezing it as her hand pushed at the one tormenting her clit, her body wrenching forward, pushing back as he thrust into her.

He wrapped her in his arms and continued to thrust, burying his face against her neck as he grunted, pumping purposely before stilling, holding himself fully sheathed inside her.

“So you don’t have plans today?” He smirked though heavy breaths against her back.

“No,” Katherine chuckled, “do you?”

“I have nothing pressing to accomplish today.”

“Can we go to Central Park?”

“I guess... what do you want to do at Central Park?”

Katherine turned so she faced him. “It’s supposed to be pretty today, I thought a walk might be nice.”

“Are you going to bring your camera?”

“Yes.” She smiled.

Rafael rolled his eyes and kissed her, grabbing his boxer briefs as he climbed out of her bed.

“Is that a yes?” She asked, grabbing her robe as she followed him.

“As long as I can have coffee first.”

“I’ll make you breakfast.” Katherine grinned.

 

They had left her place a little after noon, both of them having to shower separately taking up a bit more time. Neither were on a schedule so the noon start didn’t disrupt anything.

“Do you know how to get to the carousel?” Katherine questioned as they rounded the corner moving away from her building.

“I do. Are you on a mission to get a picture of us at every carousel in the city?” Rafael chuckled.

“Maybe.” She smirked, linking her arm with his.

They walked through various paths, Rafael pausing as she took pictures of different things that caught her interest. She spent a good amount of time taking pictures around the boathouse and lake, before Rafael took her hand and guided her to the carousel.

“It’s not very open.” She noted as they approached. She had hoped to get a picture of the carousel from a distance, but you could barely see it due to the enclosure around it.

“You still want your picture?” He smirked.

“I do.”

They waited in a short line to ride. It was late March so most of the tourist weren’t traveling yet making her affinity for touristy thing more tolerable to Rafael. Katherine dragged him to a bench seat, cuddling closer to him once they were both seated.

“I can take your picture on a horse.” He teased, pointing to the back end of the horse directly in front of them.

“I’m good.” She smiled.

“Why do you like carousels?”

“I’m not really sure that I necessarily like them.” Katherine shrugged.

“This is the second one you’ve forced me to accompany you on.”

“Force is a rather strong word choice.” She chuckled and Rafael rolled his eyes. “I don’t know... this city just seems to have a lot of carousels...”

“So it’s just because they happen to be here?”

“I guess, they have a wistful thing about them don’t you think?” Katherine said more than asked, staring at the intricate woodwork.

“I think the horses are creepy.”

“Let me take my picture.” Katherine chuckled.

 

They walked back towards her apartment, neither in any rush to get there. It was only Saturday and barely passed three, one of the few times a day dragging on wouldn’t be complained about.

“If this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is...” Katherine murmured mostly to herself as the walked hand in hand down the side walk.

“You a Vonnegut fan?” Rafael asked, quirking a brow at her. She hadn’t used the full quote, just the advice within it.

“He wrote my favorite book, but he’s not my favorite author.” Katherine replied, leaning against him.

“How’s that?”

“I read A Man Without A Country at a very influential time in my life... it’s my favorite book. I’ve enjoyed other books by him, Galapagos, Cats Cradle... of course Slaughterhouse Five, but David Sedaris is my favorite author. There isn’t anything he has written that I haven’t read and I’ve listened to him read his stories so many times on This American Life and audio books that I can’t read anything new by him without hearing him deliver it in my head.”

“Is he the guy that writes those dark Christmas stories?” Rafael asked.

“This American Life did a whole episode called A Very Sedaris Christmas, three acts, all short stories from his book Holidays On Ice. I’m pretty sure the rest of the short stories from that book have made it on episodes over the years.” Katherine chuckled. “He writes more than Christmas stories, though, mostly humorous pieces about his family or life.”

“You have a book I could barrow?”

“I have all of his books, two copies of the first book I ever read by him because I bought a second copy for him to sign at a reading.”

“Which one is you favorite?” Rafael smiled, taking her hand as he guided them into a coffee shop.

“Me Talk Pretty One Day. It’s the one I have a signed copy of.”

“Can I read the non sighed copy?”

“You don’t have to read it just because I enjoy it.” Katherine took a step forward with Rafael as the line moved.

“If he’s your favorite author I’d like to read him.”

“Ok.” Katherine nodded, dismissing the urge to convince him not to read one of her favorite books as an uneasy feeling settled over her.

“What wrong?” Rafael questioned when she became quieter than before.

“Nothing.”

“Katherine...”

“If you end up not liking the book...” Katherine sighed. She didn’t know how to ask him what she wanted to ask him. “Just don’t ruin it for me.”

“How would I do that?” He furrowed his brow and Katherine looked at the floor.

“Never mind.”

“What are you avoiding telling me.” Rafael smiled, pulling her to look at him again.

“Scott would always dismiss the things I enjoyed. I never watched my favorite movie with him, never listened to NPR or any of Sedaris’ things... He would have found something wrong with it.” She had hated not being able to share the things she enjoyed with him, but it was better than having them picked apart.

“I’ll be honest about whether or not I like the book, but I wouldn’t dismiss or pick apart something you enjoyed. We are allowed to have different interest.”

“Ok.” Katherine nodded.

“You never watched your favorite movie with him?”

“We started watching a movie that I really liked. It wasn’t my favorite, but high on my list... This was early in the relationship. We didn’t even make it halfway through before he had basically called it a terrible movie, resulting in an argument as I tried to defend my reasoning for liking the movie so much. I know now that it really didn’t matter which movie it had been, it was more that I had picked it... but at the time... I never even told him what my favorite movie was.” She shrugged.

“What was the movie you two watched?”

“Primal Fear.”

Rafael smiled and shook his head.

“What?” Katherine frowned.

“How do you find a way to complain about watching Primal Fear? I mean if you forced me to watch The Notebook I’d groan, but suffer through it. Primal Fear though...”

“He hated watching movies that weren’t current.”

“But it’s Primal Fear.”

Katherine pressed her hand to his cheek, grazing her thumb across it as she smiled. “You’re really cute.”

“Cute?” He smirked.

“Cute.” She confirmed, motioning with her head to the counter when the only person left in front of them moved out of the way.

“What can I get you?” The teenager behind the counter asked.

Rafael gestured for her to order first.

“Iced Americano.”

“Not iced Americano.” He smirked.

“Do you need room for cream?” The teen asked.

“No.” Both Katherine and Rafael replied, smiling at each other when they did.

They stepped to the side after they paid, Rafael pulling her closer to him as she giggled.

“We’re acting like we’re the age of the girl who took our order.” Katherine grinned.

“So.” He smiled.

He was leaning in to kiss her when a small voice quietly said her name. “Ms. Morgan?”

Katherine turned in the direction it had come from as Rafael loosened his hold on her.

“MJ, hi.”

“I didn’t mean to interrupt.” MJ said, looking down at her book.

“You’re not interrupting. I would have been sad if you hadn’t said hello.” Katherine smiled.

“Are you sure?” MJ asked, her eyes uneasy as she glanced at Rafael.

“I am. This is my...” Katherine started to say friend, but MJ’s mothers use of the word friend popped into her head so opted to be truthful, “boyfriend, Rafael Barba.”

“It’s nice to meet you Mr. Barba.” MJ said.

“You too.” He smiled.

“Are you here alone?” Katherine asked.

“I like to read here when my mom’s busy. She knows where I am.” MJ shrugged.

Katherine lifted her head when the barista called Rafael’s name.

“I’ll get them.” Rafael said.

“Can you put two sugars in mine?” Rafael nodded, gently rubbing her shoulder while making his way to the bar.

“He seems nice.” MJ said.

“He is nice,” Katherine smiled tapping the cover of MJ’s book, “a bit of a mixture of Phineas and Gene.”

“Do you live together?”

“No.” Her student didn’t need to know she was planning to move in him that summer.

Rafael took a sip of his Americano as he handed Katherine hers.

“Thanks.” Katherine smiled, taking it from him.

“See you Monday, Ms. Morgan.”

“See you Monday.” Katherine nodded, following Rafael out of the coffee shop.

“So that’s MJ?” Rafael asked as they walked to her apartment.

“She’s a good kid... dealt a bad hand though” Katherine sighed.

“She’s smart.”

“How can you tell?”

“She restated my name when greeting me,” he lifted his brow as though impressed, “I’ve met grown adults who can’t follow that simple rule of professionalism and I’m pretty sure I didn’t read A Separate Peace until I was a freshman in high school.”

“You’ve read it?” Rafael nodded and took her hand in his. “Do you relate more to Phineas or Gene?” She asked this mostly to see how which one he picked since she saw bits of both characters in him.

“I have to choose between them?” He smirked.

“It’s actually better if you don’t.” Katherine chuckled, pulling his arm around her and linking hers around his waist.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Episode reference: season 16 episode 18 Devastating Story

 

Katherine hadn’t seen Amanda in what felt like weeks. SVU had picked up a case that was keeping both her and Rafael busy. She had at least been able to curl up next to Rafael at night a few times... not as often as she would have like to, but occasionally was better than nothing.

“How’d your case go?” Katherine asked as she opened a bottle of wine and poured a glass for herself.

“None for me.” Amanda said, motioning at the second glass Katherine was about to make for her. “Haven’t you talked to Barba?”

“All I know is the DA was pushing hard on the case and now Rafael has a lot of loose ends, or something, to tie up... he was vague and sounded stressed. He’s coming over later.”

“This case... the victim who was actually raped lied about the details, we moved too quickly... and Barba... I think he and Liv are taking the brunt of the backlash.” Amanda sighed.

“I thought the mayor pushed for this case?”

“His wife... after watching a segment on America’s Worst Crimes, not that he’d take any responsibility if it had been him.” Amanda grumbled.

“At least you should be more available now.” Katherine smiled.

“Tired of Barba already?” Amanda teased.

“No, but it does kind of suck that when Rafael’s busy you are too.” Katherine sighed, lifting her glass of wine to take a sip. “Why aren’t you drinking?”

“Because I’m pregnant.”

Katherine almost choked, coughing and holding her hand to her chest until she had cleared the wine that had gone down the wrong pipe. “You’re what?”

“Pregnant.”

“Is it... whose is it?”

“Declan’s... he’s that guy you met during the blizzard.” Amanda replied.

“Have you told him?”

“I’m not sure I’m going to...”

“Amanda... you should tell him. He should know he’s going to have a kid...” Katherine tilted her head as she cut her eyes back up at Amanda.

“That’s a Barba look.” Amanda grumbled.

Katherine ignored Amanda’s comment, she knew exactly who she had gotten the look from and found it quite effective in her classroom. “Wouldn’t you want to know? I mean if you weren’t the one who had to give brith...”

“I can’t exactly contact him, he’s working undercover... I don’t even know what state he’s in.”

Katherine was quiet.

“Kate... don’t tell Barba I’m pregnant. I haven’t told anyone at work yet.”

“That’s your news to share, I won’t say anything.”

“And don’t tell him it’s Declan’s when it eventually does come out... I mean if I haven’t told Declan yet.”

“Ok.” Katherine nodded. Normally she’d hate the idea of keeping a secret from Rafael, but this wan’t her secret and it’s not like Rafael would be upset that she hadn’t told him. Amanda should be allowed to confide in her friend without worrying who else would be told.

 

Rafael let himself into Katherines apartment a little less than an hour after Amanda had left. He tossed his jacket and tie on her couch before stripping the vest off as well.

“Do you have ibuprofen?” He asked while leaning down to greet her with a quick kiss.

“In the medicine cabinet.”

Katherine watched him disappear in her bathroom only to return a moment later with a few pills in his hand. “Rough day?”

Rafael huffed out a sarcastic laugh a tossed the pills back with a glass of water. “It doesn’t matter, it’s over now.”

“Still...” Katherine said as he sat next to her on the couch, inching herself behind him to rub his shoulders.

“I had to drop all charges,” he half moaned when she hit a particularly tense spot, “there was no way a jury would have believed her... her story changed too much.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It is what it is...” He shrugged, turning and pulling her into a deep kiss, his mind wanting to move on from the crappy couple of weeks he had had. Weeks made more insufferable by the fact that he had barely seen her.

“What can I do?” Katherine panted, pressing her forehead to his when their lips finally parted.

“You’re doing it.” Rafael smiled, kissing her again.

He pushed he back on her couch, slipping the lounge pants she was wearing down her legs as she pushed his suspenders off.

“Raf?”

“Yes.” He breathed, barely lifting himself from her as he stripped from the waist down.

She was going to ask him if he was sure sex was the answer, if he didn’t want to wait until tomorrow and the stress of everything had dissipated a bit. “I’ve missed you.” Is what came out instead.

“You have no idea how much I’ve missed you.” He breathed, his lips finding hers again as he eased inside her.

It wasn’t hurried, it wasn’t rough, it was two people being together. Lips parting only so his could move to another location on her body. His body rocking into hers, taking his time despite how exhausted he was. He would never be too tired for this. She somehow took all of his burdens away and he would bask in that for as long as he could.

“My god...” Katherine groaned, her body buckling beneath him.

Rafael pressed his lips to hers again, his hands holding her face as he thrust through her orgasm, not spreading up or slowing down. “Do you need me to finish?”

“I don’t know...” It was breathy and almost indiscernible.

Rafael increased his pace and Katherine gasped, her head arching back against the couch. “I’m almost there.” He panted, burying his head against her neck, grunting moments later as he collapsed on her.

Katherine ran her hand through is hair as he caught his breath. “I love you.”

“Love somehow doesn’t seem like a strong enough word.” He hummed, pulling up to look at her.

“No... it doesn’t.” She smiled, bringing her hand to his cheek.

“You want to get some sleep?”

Katherine nodded, letting him help her up once he climbed off her.

“Where’s that book?”

“What book?” Katherine asked, furrowing her brow.

“The one by your favorite author.”

“Oh.” Katherine leaned over, pulling a paperback copy of Me Talk Pretty One Day off her shelf and smirked as she handed it to him. “You look ridiculous in your dress shirt and nothing else.”

He chuckled and followed her to her bedroom. “I’d say the same about you, but you look really good in just a t-shirt.”

Katherine unbuttoned the shirt and pushed it off his shoulders, tugging the undershirt off as well before pressing herself as close to him as possible. Her arms wrapped tightly around his chest as her head rested on his shoulder.

“What was that for?” He smirked when she finally pulled away.

“No reason.” She smiled, tugging her own shirt off and climbing in bed.

Rafael crawled beside her and flipped to the first chapter in the book she had given him.

“You’re reading it now?”

“Maybe just the first chapter.” He shrugged.

Katherine cuddle closer so she could read along with him, it had been years since she had read the book and a bit of a refresher sounded nice. Rafael stretched his arm out, wrapping it around her so that he could reach to turn the page.

 

They had slept in much later than either of them had meant to. That’s what happens when you stay up, on very little sleep to begin with, so that you can keep reading chapter after chapter in a book. Katherine had been pleased that he genuinely seemed interested. If he wasn’t, they wouldn’t have made it through eight chapters before finally conceding to sleep.

“Do you want a sandwich or to go out for lunch?” Katherine asked when she exited the bathroom after her shower.

Rafael chuckled as he read holding up a finger until he finished the paragraph he was on. “We can go out.” He smiled when she pouted.

“You’re reading without me.”

“You’ve read it before.” He smiled, passing her to take his own shower.

“More than once.” Katherine smirked, quickly skimming through the part he had read.

She had almost finished with her hair when Rafael joined her in her bedroom. He slipped on a casual blue button up and jeans and made himself comfortable on her bed to read until she finished with the mirror so he could use it. Something she would have finished sooner if she had been able to stop herself from watching him quietly chuckle to himself while reading.

“He’s funny, huh?” She smiled, pulling him from the book now that she was completely dressed and ready.

“He makes you laugh when your least expecting to laugh.”

“I know, you’re sitting there reading and then one line will make you laugh out loud. His stories can be a bit dark at times... there’s one about his mom dying from lung cancer. I swear I was on the verge of tears and then he tied everything back in to a funny anecdote from earlier in the story. I laughed while simultaneously feeling bad for laughing. He’s good at that... making you laugh when you shouldn’t.”

“I’d like to listen to him sometime, you said he’s read his stories on NPR?” Rafael set the book down and styled his hair.

“This American Life has their shows archived online, we can do a search and listen to some later if you want.”

“I’d like that.” He smiled, taking her hand to leave for lunch.

“Do you not have work you need to get done this weekend?” Katherine knew the trial hadn’t gone well and he was getting reamed from higher ups.

Rafael pulled her closer. “Nothing that can’t wait until Monday.”

“But...”

“This case is receiving a lot of media attention, it’ll blow over and become just one of the many cases I’ve prosecuted. I’m not concerned with the backlash and there’s nothing I can do about it now anyway. Monday I’ll finalize the paperwork and move on from most of it.”

“Most of it?”

“Conner Howell, the one who did actually rape her... he looked so smug when the charges were dropped. You don’t move passed watching a rapist be emboldened right in front of you.” He sighed.

“I’m sorry Raf...”

“It is what it is.” Rafael guided her into a restaurant they frequented when he stayed over, something that happened a lot lately, aside from the recent trial keeping him away.

“You want to sleep at your place tonight?” Katherine smiled while sitting in the chair Rafael had pulled out for her.

“We can.”

“It’ll be nice in a few months when we don’t have to figure out whose place we’re going to sleep at.”

“Yes it will.” Rafael took her hand in his from across the table, smiling at the thought of coming home to her every night... no matter how late work kept him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Amanda doesn’t find out she’s pregnant until next season on the actual show, but I assume that was to work around Kelli Giddish’s actual pregnancy since Rollins would have been at least five months pregnant by that time...


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve added a picture to the beginning of each chapter... mostly because I’ve been a bit blocked lately and The Path has given me useful images.

 

“Raf.” Katherine panted as her head slid further off the bed.

Rafael paused mid thrust to look at her. “Sorry.” He chuckled, pulling her back on the bed and draping himself over her, his lips finding hers when he started thrusting again, his upper body helping to keep her in place this time.

“We have a lot of sex.” Katherine murmured as she laid in his arms her fingertips lightly grazing his chest.

“Do you want to have less sex?” He smirked.

“No. It was just an observation.”

“I enjoy sex with you.”

“Same here,” Katherine hummed, “but... do you think we use it as a defense mechanism at times?”

“I can think of worse ways to relieve stress.”

“So I shouldn’t worry when we have sex after you’ve had a particularly stressful case?”

“Can you honestly tell me you’ve never had sex with me to distract yourself from something you didn’t want to think about.” Rafael chuckled.

“No.” Katherine mumbled, knowing full well she had enjoyed escaping into a space that existed of only them when thoughts of her ex, however unwanted they were, invaded her mind.

“And did it diminish anything between us?” He smirked.

“Of course not.”

“Then...”

“Then I won’t worry about it.” Katherine smiled.

Rafael pulled her closer, kissing her briefly, then let her cuddle against his chest again. “When do you plan to start packing?”

“The week after school lets out. I doubt it will take too long, I really don’t have that much stuff and I wont need to bring the things you already have, which means I’ll donate most of my kitchen. I really only have the bare essentials and your kitchen... you’ve got some great stuff in there.” Her mind went to the mismatched set of Pyrex containers she had acquired from god knows where that she used as mixing bowls.

“I know.” Rafael smiled.

“How come no one has been bugging you the last few days?”

“Liv’s in Chicago.”

“So all of SVU took a vacation?

“She took Amaro and Fin with her.” Rafael chuckled. “Are you tired of me?”

“Not at all, I was just curious. So that means Amanda was left alone at the station with Sonny?” Katherine asked, unsuccessfully trying not to laugh.

“I don’t envy her.” Rafael smirked.

 

The reprieve from Rafael’s burdening workload was brief and Katherine found herself spending days without seeing him at all. The case that had taken half of SVU to Chicago had led them back to New York and while they had arrested Greg Yates, the trial itself was proving to be as difficult as they had expected considering the lack of evidence.

Rafael let himself in to his apartment, slowly making his way to his bedroom. He hadn’t brought anything home with him as it was close to midnight. His plan was to get at least four hours of sleep and go in early, maybe he’d figure something out then. He dropped the clothes the needed dry cleaning in a bag as he stripped, the regularly laundered articles landing in the hamper. He was left in only his boxer briefs when he exhaustedly crawled in bed and was startled by someone cuddling against him.

“Katherine...” He jumped slightly as their skin made contact, having not expected anyone in his bed. “Not that I mind, but what are you doing here?”

“I missed you and I though I could at least sleep next to you.” Katherine murmured sleepily while draping her arm across his chest.

Rafael smiled and pulled her closer. “I’ve missed you too.”

Katherine’s breathing leveled back out as she quickly fell back asleep, a soft soothing sound that lulled Rafael’s active mind, himself drifting off shortly after.

 

Katherine’s alarm went off first, but only by a few seconds, both of them reaching for their respective sources of noise as they quickly silenced them.

“Morning?” Rafael smiled.

“Should I have texted or called that I was coming over?” In the moment, Katherine had planned to surprise him. She knew he had eaten dinner in his office, but still thought he’d get home before nine. Instead she fell asleep waiting on him.

“I was a bit startled, but once I realized who was in my bed I was fine.” Rafael smiled. “You just wanted to sleep next to me?”

“I wanted to see you and I thought you’d be home before you were. I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”

“I must say you being in my bed was a pleasant surprise.”

“I’m glad, because I was afraid it might border on stalkerish as I was falling asleep last night, but I was too tired to make myself go home at that point.” Katherine chuckled as she stretched, her body coming to rest in his arms.

“You want me to drop you off at work or your apartment?”

“Work. I brought everything I need for today with me.”

Katherine followed him out of bed and to the shower, both of them getting ready afterward, smiling at each other as they effortlessly shared his oversized bathroom. Two cups of coffee, and a short discussion on how the trial was going over cereal and they were off to work, Katherine clutching a travel mug while Rafael would just make more coffee at the office.

“Have a good day.” Rafael smiled, giving her a kiss as they pulled up to her school.

“You too.” She smiled back.

 

It only took a few more days for the trial to end, Rafael getting his guilty verdict. It was late on a Friday afternoon when he texted Katherine that he was going to get all his paperwork done so he could spend the weekend with her.

“I may see if Amanda wants to hangout tonight and you can pick me up for lunch tomorrow.” Katherine smiled as she texted back, hoping to get to see Amanda as well now that the trial was over.

“What time do you want to do lunch?”

“Eleven.”

“I’ll pick you up then.”

Katherine finalized a few things at work and then gathered her things to go home. It was late April and the school year was beginning to wind down. Sure she had end of the year activities coming up, but for the most part her routine was down and her workdays not as long. This would change when she started packing up her classroom for summer, while trying to still teach and manage twenty students that thought summer had already begun, but right now was a rare time during the school year where she could leave before six.

She dropped her things off in her apartment and then ventured back downstairs to Amanda’s apartment.

“Katherine?” Amanda sounded startled as she opened the door.

“Rafael’s finishing up with whatever he does after a trial is over so I thought I’d see if you were free to get dinner tonight.”

“Uh...” Amanda glanced over her shoulder as the water in her shower cut off. “Yeah, we can do that, but can you give me half an hour maybe...”

She continued to apprehensively look back towards her bathroom. Katherine’s eyes widened when she watched Nick emerge in only a towel.

“That’s fine. Come upstairs when you’re finished here.” Katherine gestured toward Nick who smiled and waved as he sat on Amanda’s couch.

Amanda rolled her eyes and shut the door, leaving Katherine slightly stunned as she made her way back to her apartment.

 

They had been at the restaurant for thirty minutes, Katherine deciding not to bring up the fact that Nick had showered in Amanda’s apartment. He may have just needed to borrow her shower because his was broken or something. If Amanda wanted to bring it up she could.

“How many more drinks is it going to take for you to ask?” Amanda chuckled as the waitress brought Katherine her third martini.

“Are you back together?” Technically Amanda had brought it up...

“No.”

“So he just needed to use your shower then?” Katherine quipped.

“No, we slept together... that doesn’t mean we are together.” Amanda shrugged.

“But...”

“It’s like it was before... convenience maybe? I don’t know. Even if I would have been interested in more before it’s even more complicated now...” Amanda sighed as her hand rested on her stomach.

“Does he know?”

“No.”

“I don’t really know him, but you said he had kids so maybe it isn’t as complicated as you think it is.” Katherine suggested.

“He has kids, none of which are babies anymore. A newborn is a different kind of commitment.”

“But...”

“It’s not like it will be a secret forever. If he wants more he can initiate... I’m not going to ask for anything.”

“You never do.” Katherine shook her head slightly.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Amanda huffed.

“That you’re stubborn and hate asking anyone for help.” Katherine smiled.

“I just don’t want Nick to feel like he’s obligated or something.”

“So tell him and let him decide. I doubt he’d feel obligated since it isn’t his kid.”

“Can’t I just use him for sex instead?” Amanda smirked.

“If that’s what you both want.”

“I promise if he tells me he wants something more I’ll tell him.”

“You know I’m here for you if you need help once that baby gets here.”

“I know.” Amanda smiled.

 

Rafael got to Katherine’s apartment thirty minutes early and made himself comfortable on the bed as she finished getting ready.

“How was dinner with Rollins?”

“It was good.” She started to say more, but the only things she could think of were seeing Nick in a towel on Amanda’s couch and the fact that Amanda was pregnant. After taking a breath, clearly indicating she had intended to say something more she bit her lip and awkwardly looked away, searching through her jewelry for earrings.

“What are you trying not to tell me?” Rafael chuckled.

“Nothing.”

“What? Did you two talk about me?”

“Actually, no...” Katherine furrowed her brow, realizing for the first time Rafael hadn’t come up in conversation at all.

“What then?” He smirked, moving closer to her as she fastened an earring.

“Nick was at Amanda’s when I went to see if she wanted to have dinner.” She shrugged.

“Are they back together?”

“I’m not sure they ever were together.” Katherine smiled grabbing his hand and dragging him out of her apartment.

The topic of Nick would give them just enough to discuss from her dinner with Amanda without her having to go into the fact that Amanda was pregnant.

 

“This Yates guy you prosecuted... He was living between the two cities?” Katherine asked, pulling the covers tighter around her as she shifted to look at Rafael.

“Something like that, why?”

“And he raped and murdered women, transporting their bodies back to New York?”

“He didn’t always bring them back, sometimes he just set fire to them to destroy the evidence.”

“The girl you prosecuted him for killing was a friend of the cops from Chicago?”

“Yes.”

“And she worked with them?”

“Katherine...” Rafael sighed, “why are you curious about this, you’ve never been that interested in my trials before?”

“It’s like an episode of Criminal Minds...”

“Only it’s real life.” Rafael grumbled.

“He’s in jail now.” Katherine shrugged, resting her head back against his chest. “And you have to remember, I’ve never actually talk to or seen this guy so it’s all second hand for me. That creates some separation. He could be a Bundy or a Dahmer as far as I’m concerned... someone notorious you read about but you’re also detached from.”

“I’d still prefer not to talk about it.”

Katherine lifted to look at him again. “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry, I like that you’re a curious person.” He smirked.

“No, I’m sorry I didn’t think about how a trial like that might effect you. You rarely talk about your work. It hadn’t occurred to me that you might not talk about it because it got to you. You must know more details than were made public and...”

“Those details are gruesome...” Rafael sighed, running his hand through her hair as his eyes connected with hers. “The people I prosecute, the cases SVU works... it’s not something I want to take home.”

“You pick the subject then... anything you want.” Katherine smiled.

“Anything?” He cocked an eyebrow at her playfully.

“Anything.” She smirked.

“Do you have any fantasies?”

“You mean sexually?”

Rafael nodded, pulling her so she was laying on his chest, her legs straddling his sides.

“No.”

“Come on... you said anything.” He pouted playfully.

“And I’m answering honestly... There was I time in my life when I thought I’d forever be responsible for my own orgasm... I found thinking about sex to be depressing when I thought I’d never enjoy myself that way again, so I stopped.”

Rafael frowned. “Responsible for your own orgasm?”

“Self fulfillment.” She smiled, lifting her brows at him.

“You had to think about something while you were taking care of your own needs?” He smirked.

“I wouldn’t call them fantasies... mostly I thought about experiences I had had in the past.” She shrugged. “Thinking about sex I hadn’t had... some kind of hope for the future felt like I was opening myself up to the idea of cheating and that’s not something I’m ok with.”

Rafael tightened the arms he had wrapped around her. “What about after your divorce? That year you spent in New York before we met again at the bar.”

Katherine felt her face flush.

“Now you have to tell me.” Rafael grinned.

“I thought about you, but believe me... you’ve surpassed any fantasy I could have dreamed up.” Her face was still pink, but she hadn’t bothered to look away. Rafael was her boyfriend, the man she was planning to live with and he was extremely good in bed. She didn’t care if he knew it... she assumed he did know.

Rafael pulled up to kiss her, making it so she was sitting in his lap. “You thought about me, huh?”

“Shut up.” Katherine chuckled, covering his mouth with hers before his smirk could get any larger.

Neither of them were clothed, having enjoyed each other’s company in his bed earlier that morning. The Sunday lazily dragging on as neither seemed pressed to move to another location in his apartment.

Rafael lifted her slightly, guiding her onto him, her lips never leaving his as she started to move on him. Katherine gripped his hair when his hands squeezed her ass, guiding her movements as she rode him.

“How could it get any better than this.” She breathed, her head pushing into his shoulder as she felt a peak building within.

“I love you.” He hummed, pressing his lips to hers as she began to unravel above him. Her arms wrapped around his neck as her body quivered and slumped against his.

Gently, he shifted her below him, his body pumping purposefully in search of his own release. 

“I love you too.” She smiled as he stilled, his weight pressing down on her, his breathing labored against her neck.

“Did you want to actually do anything, or just keep having sex all day?” Rafael chuckled.

“I could eat, then I’m up for another round if you are?”

Rafael smiled and dragged her behind him to the shower. He knew she wanted to get home in time to do a little grading later that night, so the sooner they grabbed lunch, the longer he’d have with her.

 

Katherine had spent the last hour grading. She had changed to a pair of pajama shorts and a long sleeve shirt Rafael had left at her place, the shirt she slept in most nights he wasn’t sleeping next to her. The shirt fit snuggly on him, but was loose on her, even the sleeves coming passed her wrist even though he wasn’t that much taller than her. She pulled her laptop out from under her couch and logged into the districts website, pulling up her grade book. Stacking the assignments she had just graded next to her she began to enter them, saving her an item on her to do list for the next day.

She had just finished placing her students work back in a bag she had brought them home from school in when there was a knock at her door. Glancing out the peephole she could barely see the top of a child’s head.

“MJ?” Katherine questioned, opening the door wider for the frightened looking girl to enter.

“My mom... he’s hurting my mom.” MJ stammered, panic laced in her voice.

Katherine didn’t ask any more, instead she grabbed her phone and dialed 911, giving the operator as much information as MJ could articulate and MJ’s address.


	23. Chapter 23

 

Katherine led MJ to her couch, both of them sitting once she was off the phone with the emergency operator.

“I’m sorry Ms. Morgan. I panicked and you were the only adult I knew that lived close by.”

“How did you know where I lived?”

MJ looked at her feet. “That day I ran into you and your boyfriend at the coffee shop... I kind of followed you. I was bored with reading and was curious since you said you lived close to school... I was only going to see which building you lived in, but then someone exited and I snuck in and saw you two enter this apartment. I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok. It helped to pass some time?” Katherine smiled, remembering how curious she had been at that age. She was pretty sure the she and her friend Erin had played PI’s as children and not so covertly followed countless neighbors around the four block radius of Erin’s parent’s house, the bit that set between higher trafficked roads. “I’m going to call my friend Amanda, she’s a detective and will hopefully be able to keep us updated on what’s happening with your mom, ok?”

MJ nodded and Katherine pressed her contact for Amanda, feeling a bit relieved when she picked up after one ring. Amanda had been scavenging her kitchen for a late dinner, but assured her she’d be up stairs in a few minutes.

“Hey MJ, I’m Detective Rollins, you can call me Amanda, I’m a friend of your teacher’s. Can you tell me what happened tonight?” Amanda sat in one of the chairs next to Katherines green table, taking notes on a small notepad as Katherine sat on the opposite side of MJ.

“One of my mom’s...” MJ paused and then settled on the word her mother used for them, “friends... he sounded really upset and started yelling. I heard her scream and then what sounded like hitting... I got scared and ran to Ms. Morgan’s.”

“You heard this?” Amanda questioned.

“My mom prefers not to have someone over when I’m home, but when she does I either go to the coffee shop around the corner or if it’s later, like tonight, I hide in the coat closet.”

“What do your mom and her friend do together?”

“He’s not really her friend, it’s just what she calls them. There are a few that come around regularly, most of the time it’s someone I’ve never seen before. Tonight’s guy was someone new.”

Amanda could assume what MJ’s mother did with the revolving door of men so she decided not to push MJ for more on that at the moment. “So you saw him?”

“The door to the coat closet has a large gap between it and the door frame. It’s dark in the closet so you cant see me but I can see out. He paced in the living room while my mom got the bedroom ready... I got a pretty good look at him.” MJ nodded.

“Ok.” Amanda smiled softly at MJ, slipping her notepad back in her pocket. “Can I use your bedroom to check in with Liv?” Amanda asked, directing that question to Katherine.

“Yeah... you called Liv?”

“Actually, Liv called me. Due to the nature of the case patrol passed it off to SVU.”

Katherine exhaled and focused her gaze on the floor for a moment before looking back at her student.

“What is it?” MJ asked.

“I’m not sure yet.” Katherine lied. Whatever information MJ would learn about the condition of her mother didn’t have to come from her. There was a whole unit in the NYPD specifically trained to do just that and she was more than willing to let them.

“Do you think you’d recognize the man if you saw him?” Amanda asked as she emerged from Katherine’s bedroom.

MJ nodded and scooted closer to Katherine on the couch.

“My lieutenant asked me to bring you down to the station. Are you ok with that?”

“Can Ms. Morgan come with me?”

Amanda glanced at Katherine, who gave her subtle nod to indicate she was ok with accompanying MJ.

“That should be ok.” Amanda nodded.

“Let me change into yoga pants.” Katherine smiled, giving MJ a quick pat as she passed her to swap her pajama shorts for something that didn’t look like she was about to crawl in bed.

“Is my mom ok?” Katherine heard MJ ask from her bedroom.

“They’ve got her at the hospital, but that’s all I know right now.” Amanda replied. “I’ll see if I can get an update for you when we get to the station.”

Katherine didn’t bother to change out of Rafael’s shirt, the light green looked nice with her dark gray pants. The clothes were comfortable and though the shirt was loose, it didn’t completely swallow her like his looser fitting t-shirts did.

“You ready?” Katherine smiled, offering MJ her hand.

“I guess.” MJ nodded.

They both followed Amanda out of Katherines apartment and down to Amanda’s car.

 

“MJ. I’m Olivia, Detective Rollins said you might be able to pick out the man who hurt your mom.” Liv said bending down to MJ’s level as the three entered the bullpen.

“I got a good look at him.” MJ nodded.

“That’s great.” Liv smiled. “We’re going to have a few men stand behind glass and you can tell us if you recognize anyone, ok?”

“Will they be able to see me?”

“No MJ. It’s a two way mirror. You can see them but they can’t see you.” Katherine said, resting her hand on the girls shoulder.

“Like that mirror we looked at when you taught us about light and how it can reflect or refract depending on what it travels through?” MJ asked, looking up at Katherine.

“Yep, this is just like that.” Katherine smiled.

“So the room I will be in will be darker than the one they will be in?” This time MJ directed the question to Liv.

“It will be.”

“Ok.” MJ nodded.

“Give us just a bit to get everything ready and then we’ll come get you.” Liv gestured to the interview room for Katherine to take MJ.

Amanda joined them a few minutes later with an update on MJ’s mom.

“She has a few broken bones and a fractured skull, but she’s awake and talking to Detectives Carisi and Amaro.”

“Has she asked about me?”

Amanda hesitated slightly before answering. “She really hasn’t gotten the chance to yet. Detectives Carisi and Amaro are trying to get as much information as possible from her so we can put the guy who did this in jail.”

“Still you’d think she’d ask if her kid was ok...” MJ sighed, dropping the subject now that she knew her mother was alive.

Liv entered the room to let them know they were ready for the lineup before Amanda could respond. MJ glanced at Katherine, who nodded encouragingly, and then took Liv’s hand leaving both Amanda and Katherine behind as she was guided out of the room.

“She’s intuitive.” Amanda noted.

“And incredibly bright...” Katherine sighed.

“How does she know where you live?”

“Raf and I ran into her at a coffee shop and MJ, being a curious kid, followed us back to my place. I didn’t know she knew where I lived until she showed up at my door tonight.” Katherine shrugged.

 

Liv guided MJ through the bullpen to where Rafael was waiting so they could proceed with the lineup.

“Mr. Barba.” MJ greeted.

Liv furrowed her brow and spoke before Rafael could respond to the child. “You two have met?”

“Katherine and I ran into MJ at a coffee shop not too long ago, she introduced us. It’s good to see you again MJ, though I wish the circumstances were better.”

“So how does this work?” MJ asked.

“You’ll stand in one room with us and the room we can see through the mirror will have men line up under numbers. If you see someone you recognize you tell us the number, ok?” Liv smiled reassuringly at MJ.

“Ok.” MJ nodded, following them into the room.

They watched as men filed in, lining up under the numbers mounted high on the wall behind them.

“Number four. He’s the man I saw in our apartment earlier. The man who hurt my mom.” MJ said, her voice seemingly unaffected as she spoke.

“You’re sure?” Liv asked.

“I have literally nothing to do when I’m stuck in that closet except watch through the gap. I’m sure. He has a tattoo on his back left shoulder, a skull. I saw it when he removed his shirt.”

“He removed his shirt?” Liv questioned.

MJ was quiet for a moment, her eyes dropping down to the floor as she realized she may have said too much. “Can I go back to Ms. Morgan now?”

“I’ll take you.” Rafael nodded, guiding her back to the bullpen where Amanda and Katherine had moved to, Liv following not far behind.

Katherine was leaning against Amanda’s desk and MJ sat in the chair next to her, scooting it closer when Carisi and Nick entered the bullpen as well.

“That ones a real piece of work.” Carisi grumbled before he realized MJ was in the room with them, his face quickly softening as he mumbled out an apology.

“When will she be able to leave the hospital?” MJ asked, ignoring the looks the others had given Carisi.

“Not for a week at least.” Nick replied.

MJ’s eyes widened as understanding set in that she wouldn’t just be left to go home, that they would have to put her somewhere... one of the places her mother had warned her about. “What happens to me then?”

“I’ve got a call in with social services. Someone should be here soon to find a temporary place for you.” Liv replied.

“Can I stay at the hospital?” MJ asked.

“You need to be where someone can take you to school.” Liv said.

“Can I stay with Ms. Morgan for a week?” MJ turned to Katherine, pleading with her. “I already sleep on a couch and I’ll be quiet, you wont even know I’m there.”

“MJ...” Katherine glanced at Rafael and then Liv. “I’m not sure it’s possible... let me talk with Mr. Barba, ok?”

MJ nodded and Katherine followed Rafael and Liv into Liv’s office. She could tell what he was going to say before the door shut, but she had to try. MJ had a hard time adjusting to new adults, if she could make this easier on her...

“Absolutely not.” Rafael huffed once the door was closed.

“It’s only a week and...”

“No, it’s at least a week.” He interrupted.

“Then it’s maybe two weeks... what’s two weeks? If you put her with an adult she doesn’t trust, she will isolate herself from all of us and you will no longer have a reliable witness not to mention the damage you’ll do to the progress she’s made this year. She’s smart, but she’s still a hurt and neglected child. She needs stability right now, I can give her that.” Katherine countered. She didn’t even know if social services would let MJ stay with her, but if anyone could make it happen it was him.

“But...”

“But what?” Katherine prodded, not backing down.

“If it would be better for MJ’s welfare, I’m sure I can convince the social worker to sign off on it.” Liv interjected, eliciting a glare from Rafael that she merely smiled at.

“Katherine... I know you’ve bonded with her but...”

“What do you think is going to happen?” Katherine exhaled, her expression a strange mixture of sadness and determination.

“Fine. If Liv can convince the social worker... I’ll take no part in helping this along though.” He conceded despite the many worst case scenarios going through his head that he could have easily responded with.

“I doubt your input will be needed.” Liv smirked, ushering Katherine back out of her office.

“Is it possible?” MJ asked as soon as Katherine got close enough for her to not have to yell.

“We have to talk with the social worker, but if they allow it my couch is yours.” Katherine smiled.

MJ relaxed slightly, though only slightly and moved closer to Katherine again.

 

When Cynthia, the social worker arrived, she initially spoke with Liv and then pulled MJ into the interview room to speak with her privately. When they emerged the social worker remained by the door while MJ returned to the chair she had been sitting in.

“Ms. Morgan.”

Katherine stood and joined Cynthia in the interview room.

“You’re MJ’s teacher?” Cynthia asked as they sat down at the table.

“I am.”

“She says she reads in your classroom in the mornings.”

“She likes to get to school early and she’s not disruptive of my morning routine, content to quietly read, so I told her she was welcome to read there instead of the noisy cafeteria.” Katherine replied.

“You’ve called DSC on her mother?”

“I was concerned after witnessing an interaction between them.” Katherine nodded.

Cynthia didn’t ask a follow up question about the call since the report was sitting in front of her. “MJ seems to trust you.”

“I’ve worked hard with her this year to build that trust.”

“Are you absolutely sure you’re comfortable with her staying with you while her mother is in the hospital? I know the time frame doesn’t seem long, but it’s a full time commitment.” Cynthia stated her hands busy moving the documents she had been taking notes on back into their folder.

“I am.” Katherine nodded.

“Ok then,” Cynthia said as she stood, “I’ll let Lieutenant Benson know I’ve approved temporary placement of MJ in your custody.”

Katherine paused as she stood to follow Cynthia back out into the bullpen. “Out of curiosity, where would MJ be placed if I weren’t available?”

Cynthia turned to her and sighed. “I group home, we don’t have many fosters available on short notice. It would take longer than her mother was in the hospital to get her placed somewhere else.”

Katherine nodded, that information solidifying her decision to let MJ stay with her. They both returned to the bullpen and Katherine leaned against Amanda’s desk again. Cynthia and Liv stepped into her office, speaking briefly before Cynthia left.

“Ok,” Liv smiled, “Amanda, can you take MJ to her apartment to pack some things, CSU should be finished by now.”

“Where am I going?” MJ questioned.

“You’ll be staying with Ms. Morgan.”

MJ exhaled the breath she had been holding and smiled up at Katherine.

“Katherine, can I borrow you before you go?” Rafael asked.

Katherine smiled back at MJ and then followed Rafael into Liv’s office, watching him pull the blinds shut once they were inside.

“What was that for?” Katherine chuckled when he moved closer to her.

“I plan on kissing you before you leave and I don’t really need all of SVU witnessing it.” He smirked.

“Are you going to be ok with this?”

“I’m concerned, but you’re right... it’s not that long. I’m going to have to trust that you know your student better than I do.”

“Will she have to testify?”

“Doubtful,” he chuckled, “they arrested him as he was exiting the apartment building. He had blood on his clothes and both MJ and her mother identified him. Amber Stacker may not use legal means to earn an income, but she has no qualms about taking down the man who attacked her.”

“He did rape her then?”

“Yes, but I doubt I’d get a conviction on it due to her line of work and the fact that she let him in with intention of him paying her for sex. I will start with both and work the charge down so that he takes a plea and serves a good amount of time for attempted murder. He’s a low level criminal so I doubt he’ll be able to afford an attorney that might actually try to fight all charges.”

“You don’t think it’ll go to trial at all then?”

“I can’t promise that, but I doubt it.” He smiled, pulling her closer. “Is this my shirt?”

“It is,” she grinned, “I’m going to need you to wear it again soon so it smells like you... I’ve had to wash it.”

“You wear it that often huh?” Rafael grinned as he leaned forward, pressing his lips to hers and tightening his arms around her. The embrace feeling all too short when he pulled back and pressed his forehead to hers.

“How is this going to work for the next week or so?” He breathed.

“We may have to sleep alone, but you can still come over and hang out. We can also go out for dinner. We’ll just have to bring MJ with us.” She chuckled.

“Are you sure that’s ok?”

“You just told me that MJ’s mom has been sleeping with men for money while MJ hides in a closet... I’m pretty sure we can all sit in the same room and watch a movie or eat. It might be good for her to see a positive example of how a member of the opposite sex should behave.”

“I don’t always behave.” He smirked.

“No you don’t, but you will.” Katherine grinned, kissing him one last time before they parted ways and she took MJ back to her apartment to get settled in.


	24. Chapter 24

 

The alarm went off at five thirty like it always did, but today Katherine struggled to get out of bed. After they left the precinct, Amanda had taken them by the hospital briefly so MJ would see her mom and then they stopped by MJ’s apartment so she could pack clothes for the duration of her stay with Katherine. The apartment had been slightly larger than hers, still a one bedroom, but not nearly as well maintained... not well maintained... that was putting it nicely, the place was a dump. The floors had more gauges than smooth spots, the paint was peeling, and the closet door wasn’t the only place with gaps were there shouldn’t be. She had watched MJ pull all of her clothes from a small dresser that was kept along the living room wall and dump them in a trash bag. By the time they returned to her apartment it was well passed midnight.

 

“Morning Ms. Morgan.” MJ yawned when Katherine exited her bedroom. She was sitting on the couch with the sheet and blanket still wrapped around her.

“Did you sleep ok?” Katherine asked as she started coffee.

“I did.”

“I’m going to take a shower and you can take one after, ok?”

MJ nodded and Katherine slipped into the bathroom, quickly showering while the coffee brewed like she did every morning. She dressed in clean underwear, but put her pajama’s back on before leaving the restroom.

“It’s all yours.”

MJ smiled and took a change of clothes with her as she disappeared into the bathroom. Katherine spent a few minutes gathering the things she’d need to take with her to work as she let her hair air dry a bit before styling it.

 

“Do you like eggs?”

“You don’t have to make me breakfast, I’m used to not eating in the morning.” MJ shrugged, her eyes lingering on the carton of eggs Katherine had pulled from her fridge.

“I’m making scrambled eggs for myself and can make a few extra for you if you’re hungry.”

“If it’s no trouble...”

“It’s not. Do you want to help, maybe toast and butter a couple pieces of bread?”

“Sure.” MJ nodded, joining Katherine in the kitchen.

Katherine pulled the toaster down from its cabinet and handed MJ the loaf of bread. “Butter is in the fridge and knives are in that drawer.” She gestured to the drawer just below the counter MJ was standing at as she cracked eggs into a bowl.

They both quietly completed their respective tasks, Katherine rinsing the bowl and pan once the eggs and toast were plated.

“Do you make breakfast every morning?” MJ asked as they ate at the sage table by the window.

“Usually. Sometimes it’s just cereal, but I am extra grumpy if I wait until lunch to eat.”

“Hangry?” MJ chuckled.

“Pretty much.” Katherine smiled. She realized it was only the beginning of day one, but so far having MJ in her home had been fairly easy. That may have had something to do with the fact that MJ was so afraid of being placed somewhere else that she was trying to be as little of an inconvenience as possible.

After they finished eating Katherine began cleaning the kitchen, like she always did.

“Can I help?” MJ asked.

“Sure.” Katherine smiled, handing her a dish towel so she could dry the dishes after Katherine cleaned them.

They were both dressed and ready for school when Katherine noticed how dirty MJ’s clothes were.

“I need to do a load or two of laundry tonight. Does anything you have need to be washed?”

MJ was quiet for a moment as they walked down the stairs. “I don’t have money for the laundry mat.”

“The building has a laundry room in the basement, the washers cost a buck fifty and the dryers are free. I think I can cover an extra load or two.”

“Ok, but only if you let me work for it. I can help organize your classroom while you get ready for tomorrow.”

“That is a deal.” Katherine smiled, holding the door open for MJ as they exited her building.

 

“Morning Mrs. Sally, Mrs. Debbie.” Katherine smiled as she signed in. Normally in the morning she left off the Mrs., only using it when students were present. This garnered their attention a bit more than her normal greeting.

“Morning Ms. Morgan, and MJ... how are you this morning?” Debbie asked. She was used to MJ buzzing to be let in, always letting her since she would quietly read in a chair until the teacher monitoring the cafeteria was scheduled. She assumed that today they had arrived at the same time.

“I’m good.” MJ replied, following Katherine out of the office and to her classroom.

They adhered to their typical morning routine, MJ reading while Katherine moved in and out of her classroom getting things ready for the day. It wasn’t until the afternoon that it became apparent to the other adults within the school that something was different.

MJ left her backpack in the classroom as her class made their way down for dismissal. Once everyone was picked up she and Katherine headed back to the stairs, passing Mrs. Andrews in the library on the way.

“Just MJ today?” Mrs. Andrews asked.

“Actually, MJ’s with me today and for the next week or so.” Katherine replied.

“My mom’s in the hospital.” MJ added.

Mrs. Andrews furrowed her brow, looking to Katherine for an explanation.

“It’s a long story that ended with MJ being placed with me temporarily.”

“I’ll have to bring Boggle up to Ms. Morgan’s room on a day I don’t have kids after school.” Mrs. Andrews smiled, gently squeezing MJ’s shoulder.

“You should.” MJ grinned.

“I need to make some copies for later this week, why don’t you finish your homework so you don’t have to do it later.” Katherine gathered a stack of worksheets she wanted to turn into a review packet and one of the math books she had found a couple really good activities in that she wanted to use for station work.

MJ made a face at the amount of things she was taking with her. “If I finish my homework before you get back is there anything you want me to focus on while straightening the classroom?”

Katherine thought for a minute, taking in the room that always looked messier than she’d like. “The student bins have papers sticking out all over the place, and the area where you turn in assignments...” she sighed as she looked at that particular corner of the room, “can you maker sure math is in math and science is in science?”

“And that your morning group and afternoon group are in the correct spots?” MJ chuckled, knowing it was something she always reminded them as they turned in assignments. It didn’t matter though, she’d always find a morning kid mix in with the afternoon group and vice versa.

“That would be fantastic?” Katherine smiled.

 

“I don’t know how you aren’t driven absolutely crazy by that girl that’s in your room...” Ms. Nelson muttered as she plopped her own stack of things she planned to copy down on the table as she determined her place in line.

Katherine had lucked into getting to the workroom just after a first grade teacher had finished with the copier and was now about halfway through with her stack, the line five teachers deep behind her. “MJ’s a good kid.”

Ms. Nelson harrumphed under her breath, but didn’t say anything. Neither did Katherine. She always felt Nelson was entirely too negative and gossiped too much... especially about students.

“Why is MJ in your room and not with Andrews?” Mrs. Lawrence questioned. She was the schools music teacher and incredibly sweet. Katherine knew that unlike Nelson, Lawrence really was just being curious.

“Some stuff came up at home and I’m helping out for the next week or so.” She was vague, but it really wasn’t their business.

The copier spit out the last of her review packets and Katherine quickly copied the pages out of the book she wanted and then ran them through the copier making tow class sets of each page.

“I’m sure it has something to due with her mother. Amber Stacker.” Nelson huffed. “The only time I could get that woman to meet with me she showed up half drunk and reeking of pot. It’s a wonder how MJ got her name.”

Katherine took a few breaths and pulled the papers from the machine, stacking them to keep the non stabled sets separate from each other. She quietly checked her mailbox, aware of the eyes waiting for her to reply... a reply she had no intention of giving them. MJ’s home life was non of their concern. Gathering her copies she headed back to her room, not even acknowledging Nelson statement as she left.

 

“Wow!” Katherine smiled as she entered her room to find the student bins straightened and the MJ sorting through the assignments that had been turned in, but not graded yet.

“I’m putting each assignment together, I hope that’s ok.” MJ smiled as she set papers in the different stacks she had placed on a group of student desk.

“That saves me a step before I grade them. If you want you can use a paper clip to bind each individual group and then stack them in this bag.” Katherine held up the bag she used to take papers to grade home in, noticing it still had the papers from last night inside. “Maybe put these on the corresponding students desk...”

The fact that her home room class came in first and then went to Ms. Winters room meant that she could have those students put the papers away and then her morning group could put theirs away, clearing the desk off for the remainder of the day.

“Sure.” MJ nodded.

“Did you finish your homework?”

“All but the twenty minutes of reading, but you and I both know I’ll complete more than that before bed.” MJ chuckled.

“Didn’t Ms. Winters give you guys a writing prompt?”

“Oh... I completely forgot.” MJ paused, glancing between her backpack and the task she had given herself.

“You think you can knock that out while we wait for our laundry to finish?” Katherine smiled.

“Definitely. I already know what I’m going to write about so it’s just a matter of putting it to paper.” MJ shrugged while sorting the papers once again.

“What’s the prompt?”

“If you had one wish, what would it be?”

“What would be your one wish?” Katherine smiled.

“That my mom would stop drinking. She’s only mean when she drinks and she only drinks to forget, or at least that’s what she says... that’s not what I’m writing about though.”

“Oh.” Katherine cleared her throat. “What are you writing about?”

“Getting into Harvard, at least I’m going to stick with Harvard to make the writing cleaner, honestly it’s just to represent any Ivy League school. It’s a wish right?” MJ shrugged again.

“How often does your mom go without drinking?” She played the question off rather well, just letting it flow as if a natural part of the conversation, not her prying.

“Every Saturday, it’s our day. We get out of the apartment and go to the park or a museum... occasionally, if she can score really cheap tickets, we’ll go to a matinee showing on Broadway or something. It’s my favorite day of the week. I know you’ve seen a different side to her, most everyone here has, but on Saturday she’s my mom.” MJ smiled.

Katherine watched MJ as she quietly went back to sorting the papers. Her mind trying to make sense of the little bit of information she had just received until her phone buzzed with a text from Rafael asking if she wanted him to bring them dinner.

“You up for dinner with Mr. Barba?”

“Sure.” MJ shrugged.

“He’s picking something up so would you prefer pizza or burgers?”

“Which ever.”

“We can’t decide, they both sound good, so if one sounded better to you that would be helpful.” Katherine smiled.

“I know what you’re doing.” MJ chuckled. “A cheeseburger and fries sounds better than pizza.”

“What do you want on your burger?”

“Mustard, pickles, tomato, and lettuce.”

“Bacon?”

“Yes.” MJ smiled.

Katherine texted Rafael back and told him to meet them in the laundry room instead of her apartment.

 

They had just got their clothes in the washers when Rafael arrived and since no one was using them the facility but them, they would be able to wash everything at once.

“I’ve never been down here before.” He smiled, giving Katherine a quick kiss while MJ’s back was to them.

“It’s amazing.” MJ grinned, moving toward the bookshelf next to a small sitting area that the landlord had put in as a leave a book take a book type library.

“Finish your paper and then you can look at the books all you want.” Katherine chuckled, handing MJ her burger and fries.

They each found a chair, Rafael and Katherine taking the two with some sibilance of a cushion, while MJ was content to spread out her homework on the bench across from them.

“Today’s gone well I see.” Rafael smiled.

“Very well.” Katherine grinned.

They finished the food and MJ handed her paper to Katherine to read through and skipped toward the bookshelf.

“Here, you proof her paper so I can start grading.” Katherine smiled while handing him the MJ’s paper.

“Harvard, huh?” Rafael smirked as he read through the first few lines.

“Or Yale, or Columbia... Stanford, Cornell, Brown, Princeton... I’ll probably be more selective once I figure out what I want to focus my studies on.” MJ’s hand stopped moving as she searched through the books. “Honestly, I just hope to get to go to college... I’d take any school.”

“Keep you sights high,” Rafael smiled, “nothing wrong with aiming for Harvard.”

Katherine chuckled and rolled her eyes.

“What?” Rafael huffed.

“You going to put in a good word for her?” She grinned.

“If she’s as focused on school at eighteen as she is now I will.” He grumbled.

Katherine smiled and handed him a stack of quizzes she needed to grade.

“What’s this?” Rafael frowned.

“If you’re through proofing her paper, you can help me grade.”

“Did you just invite me over so you could put me to work?” He smiled, taking the papers from her.

“I’m pretty sure you suggested dinner and if you want to actually do something this weekend besides watch me grade, you can be helpful. Here’s the key.”

“This post it note is your key?” He didn’t even try to hide his laugh.

“1B, 2A, 3D...” her fingers slid across the post it, “what more do you need?”

“I guess nothing.” He smiled while still slightly chuckling.

“We two are really cute.” MJ giggled, turning her attention back to the bookshelf.


	25. Chapter 25

 

Katherine and MJ left school at four for the second time that week. They had spent the better part of Tuesday evening getting everything finalized for the rest of the week so Katherine could get MJ to the hospital to visit with her mom for a bit before visitation hours ended. The first trip they made to the hospital, Katherine had been extremely nervous to Amber Stacker’s reaction to MJ staying with her, but it had gone surprisingly well. Amber had even thanked her for not letting MJ in up in a group home, which is what the social worker had told her would have happened if Katherine hadn’t volunteered. The experience had been a stark contrast to the woman she had called DCS on or heard other teachers talk about.

“I’ll wait outside.” Katherine smiled as MJ hopped on her mother’s hospital bed.

Amber smiled and nodded before turning to her daughter. “How was school?”

“Great, we’re learning about weather in science right now, tornadoes... hurricanes... other storm related stuff. It’s fascinating.” MJ grinned as Katherine shut the door and made her way to a chair not far from the room.

She always taught the severe weather unit towards the end of the year because her students all loved it and it helped ease the end of the year attention problems... at least during science.

Katherine made herself comfortable and worked on grading until six. The nurse arrived at the hospital room door at the same time she had, so she smiled and let her enter first.

“Have they decided when my mom can go home?” MJ asked.

“It’s looking like sometime next week. They’ll have a better idea once we do a follow up CT tomorrow.” The nurse smiled.

“Is that still ok?” MJ asked, turning to Katherine.

“My couch is yours for as long as it’s needed.” Katherine smiled.

“I really do appreciate this,” Amber sighed, “I grew up in and out of foster homes and group homes. I know I’m not always the best mom, but I wouldn’t wish that life on MJ... even if it was only temporary.”

“It’s no problem.” Katherine replied truthfully, MJ had been helpful if anything. She didn’t half to be asked to clean up after herself and always asked permission before she did anything, despite Katherine assuring her she didn’t have to ask to go to the restroom. Other then the impact it had on her or Rafael’s ability to spend the night with each other, she hadn’t notice an inconvenience at all. She could manage a week or so without sex, it was the sleeping in his arms thing she was missing.

“Detective Amanda and Detective Sonny!” MJ hopped off the bed and gave them each a hug, while her mother grumbled at their presents.

“What now?”

“We just stopped by to let you know that your assailant took the plea our DA offered.” Amanda said, ignoring Amber’s attitude towards them.

“What’s he getting?” Amber huffed.

“Ten years.” Carisi relied. 

“So he’ll be up for parole in what... five?” Amber huffed again.

“If it had gone to trial...” Carisi started, but Amber finished it for him.

“Yeah, I know... the jury wouldn’t look passed my profession. Like it’s my preferred source of income. Have you tried to live on minimum wage? It’s not like I’m exactly qualified for much else.”

“We have programs available to help you find work, something that might pay enough to support you.” Amanda suggested.

“Sure.” Amber shrugged. She’d appease them and take the information, but she had no intention of looking into the programs. She had before and could barely afford herself, much less herself and MJ. The life she knew was the life she planned to return to.

“I really do hate to shoo you all out, but visiting hours are over.” The nurse said while propping the door open.

“You’re bringing MJ back tomorrow?” Amber turned to Katherine.

“Yep and I should be able to bring her up earlier over the weekend so she can stay a bit longer.” Katherine smiled.

MJ gave her mom a hug as best she could so that she didn’t hurt her broken arm or bruised ribs. “Love you.”

“Love you too, bug.” Amber gave her a quick kiss on the head and let her go.

 

Katherine and MJ made a quick stop by her apartment, dropping off school bags, and then took a short subway trip to a restaurant Rafael had planned to meet them at.

“Hi Mr. Barba.”

“Hi MJ.” Rafael smiled. “Hi Katherine.” His smile turning to a smirk as he gave her a quick kiss.

“Rafael.” She chuckled.

The three were seated and Katherine had finally settle on what she wanted when she noticed MJ hadn’t even opened her menu. “Do you already know what you want?”

“Oh... I can just eat when we get back to your place.” MJ shrugged.

Rafael furrowed his brow and looked at Katherine.

“That kind of defeats the purpose of going out.” Katherine smiled.

“Aren’t restaurants expensive? My mom and I never go out, she says it cost too much. You guys don’t have to pay for me to eat out.”

“I invited both Katherine and you to dinner. I kind of figured that would include your food.” Rafael smiled.

“But you don’t have to...”

“But I want to.” Rafael smiled again.

“Are you sure?”

“I am.”

Reluctantly MJ picked up the menu, ordering something she knew she’d like but also was lower in price than the majority of the other items.

“Are you still reading A Separate Peace?” Rafael asked once the waiter left.

“No. I’m currently reading Little Women.”

“Shouldn’t you be reading Harry Potter or something?” Rafael smiled causing Katherine to chuckle.

“I have.” MJ replied, furrowing her brow at why they seemed so amused by this.

“He was just teasing that Harry Potter seemed more like something someone your age would be interested in.” Katherine smiled.

“Oh,” MJ said, smiling herself, “on Sunday’s my mom is...” she glanced at Rafael and then Katherine, “busy... I take the train to the library and spend the day there. Occasionally Sandra, the librarian, will find a kids book for me that I haven’t read that sounds interesting, but for the most part I’ve moved on to different books.”

“You finished off the entire children section?” Rafael lifted his brow.

“Not even close,” MJ chuckled, “just the books I want to read.”

“What was your favorite children’s book?” Katherine asked.

“Matilda. I read it so many times Sandra bought me a copy. I still reread it at times. You remind me a bit of Miss Honey.” Rafael laughed at MJ’s comparison, quickly stopping himself when Katherine’s eyes narrowed on him.

“What...” he shrugged a small smile still tugging at his lips, “you have bonded with your brightest student who is technically living with you at the moment.”

“You’ve read it?” MJ asked.

“No, but I was dragged to see the movie by a girl I dated briefly after college.”

“The ‘girl’ you dated in your mid to late twenties dragged you to the movies to see Matilda?” Katherine cocked her eyebrow at him, knowing the book had been released in 1988 due to the fact that she had taught it as a book study the first few years she had been employed as a teacher and taught all subjects. She herself had been ten when she read the book, but would have only been eighteen when the movie was release, and even she had waited until it was released on video to see it.

“I was twenty six and she was twenty two... albeit an immature twenty two... I said we dated briefly.” Rafael huffed.

Katherine bit back a chuckle and rested her hand on his. “I have so many more questions for another time.”

“Lets just hope you forget.” He grumbled.

 

Katherine and MJ fell into their routine once they reacher her apartment. MJ finished her homework and then read, while Katherine searched through the resources she had saved on Dropbox, making a note of activities she wanted to pull for the following week. They took turns in her bathroom to get ready for bed, Katherine taking a little long to remove her makeup in addition to brushing her teeth.

“Goodnight MJ.” Katherine said as she crossed into her bedroom.

MJ pulled the covers higher and adjusted her pillow on the couch. “Goodnight Ms. Morgan.”

Katherine shut the door to her room and crawled in bed, flipped the light off. She laid in the dark unable to sleep and staring at the ceiling. Deciding to give up on sleep for the moment, she pulled her phone from the night stand and texted Rafael.

“So... you basically went to see Matilda so that you could get laid?”

“Pretty much.” The response was almost immediate. Katherine could picture the smirk she assumed was tugging at his lips and she had to try hard not to laugh louder than a soft chuckle.

“Pig.”

“I’m your pig.”

“Jesus, I miss you.” Katherine half sighed as she typed.

“You’ve seen me everyday.”

“Yes, but you’re not here right now where I can tease you in person, both of us giggling with your arms wrapped around me. I miss that.”

“It wont be long, and then I plan to spend every night with you until you move in with me.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.” He sent back.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“Goodnight Raf.”

“Buenas noches cariño.”

Katherine sighed and plugged her phone back into charge on her nightstand. She shifted in bed and tugged the covers higher, finally drifting off the sleep.

 

The weekend came around fast. MJ had been low maintenance for the most part, but Katherine had insisted she see her mom everyday, especially after she saw how happy the interaction between the two had made MJ. Amber Stacker had been nothing but pleasant to Katherine, which made her wonder if anyone had ever bothered to help her in anyway before. Between making sure she had everything ready for the next day so she could leave work by four, spending an hour or so at the hospital, then meeting Rafael either at a restaurant or her apartment for dinner only to spend the remainder of her evening working to ensure she could do it again then next day, the days had flown by.

Katherine walked MJ, who was clutching a bag containing lunch, to her mothers hospital room at noon.

“You’re out of bed.” MJ smiled as she entered the room.

“Yep, they’re letting me move around on my own.” Amber smiled back. “What have you got in the bag?”

“Lunch.” MJ grinned.

“You didn’t have to do that.” Amber directed the statement mostly to Katherine who she had assumed bought the food.

“We figured you could use a break from the hospital food.” Katherine smiled.

“Thank you.” Amber replied as she made room on the table for them to eat.

“I’ll be back at three thirty ok MJ?” Katherine said, emphasizing the time though she doubted MJ would forget.

“Ok.” MJ nodded.

Katherine wound her way back through the maze of hallways and caught the train to Rafael’s apartment.

 

“You’re kid free.” Rafael grinned when he opened the door to let her in.

“Until three thirty.” Katherine smirked, barely giving him time to lock the door before she pressed herself against him, her lips crashing into his as her hands pushed int his hair.

Rafael continued to kiss her as he walked her to his bedroom, leaving a trail of clothes in the wake.

“A week is too long.” He panted as he climbed above her on the bed, his lips finding hers again before moving to her neck.

“I completely agree.” She breathed, her voice hitching when he engulfed her nipple in his mouth, his tongue flicking against it.

He rolled the other nipple between his fingers, pinching gently just to watch her breathing change. Katherine gripped her hands in his hair, tugging his lips back to hers as his hand reached between her legs. Her moans were muffled as he stroked his finger along her slit, slipping it into her and then up again, circling her clit, over and over again until her was focusing the movement solely on her pleasure point.

“Fuck Raf...” Katherine groaned, her hips bucking as she arched her chest against his.

“Te he extrañado, Katherine. (I’ve missed you.)” Rafael’s voice was husky and Katherine’s body shuddered beneath him.

Rafael slid his hand back up her side, pressing it into her hair behind her head, kissing her deeply as he lined himself up and eased into her.

“Jesus.” He groaned, burying his face in her neck as he bottomed out.

“Is that a good groan?” Katherine chucked while lightly running her fingers through his hair. He hadn’t moved yet, merely held himself embedded in her softness. “Raf?”

“It’s a good groan.” He exhaled, pulling himself to his elbows so that he could look at her. “A week is definitely too long.”

“You going to make it?” She teased, giggling when he rolled his eyes.

“I promise you wont be disappointed.” He smirked, pulling out and thrusting back into her.

Katherine rested he hand on his cheek, making eye contact with him as he sunk himself within her, again and again. The eye contact that had made her so nervous when they first started dating, felt completely natural now. It didn’t matter whether his gaze was soft like it tended to be when he was relaxed, or focused and intense like it currently was... those green eyes staring back at her no longer made her feel anything but safe and comfortable. Comfortable with herself, with him, and with the direction the relationship was heading... no matter how quickly it seemed to be moving.

“Fuck, you’re good at this.” It came out slightly awkward in a few places as he rubbed a particularly sensitive area within her, but that only help in eliciting a larger smirk from him.

Katherines neck arched back, followed by her chest and she gripped his hair tightly, holding on as best she could as he continued to delve, seemingly deeper as her orgasm built. Her body jerked involuntarily beneath him, her hands balling into fist still tangled in his hair. Rafael began to slow his pace, to give her a moment...

“Don’t stop.” It sounded pleading, almost desperate, and Rafael resumed his thrust from before, pressing his lips to hers in an effort to stave off is own release.

“My god.” Katherine gasped, her body thrashing uncontrollably as she erupted around him. Technically she had already had an orgasm, but it had been fleeting and when she had asked him not to stop she had no idea a second would come this quickly or be so intense.

Rafael had watched her eyes roll back, the soft sound of air escaping her lips as she tried to speak but failed to vocalize more than a breathy moan. The sight was enough to send him over the edge, grunting into her shoulder as his body stilled enveloped by her warmth.

“You ok?” He panted against her neck.

“Uh huh.” She replied somewhat indiscernibly as she caught her breath.

“Was that a yes?” He asked, pulling up to look at her.

Katherine managed to nod, rolling her eyes when he chuckled at her inability to respond verbally. Rafael didn’t bother to move from her, instead rested his head on the pillow next to hers and wrapped his arms around her.

“Definitely not disappointing.” She finally managed, though her voice still sounded ragged.

Rafael chuckled and pulled her closer, pressing a kiss against her forehead. “Good to know.”

“What time is it?”

“Almost two.”

“Do you want to take a quick shower and grab something to eat before I need to pick MJ up?”

“Sure. What are your plans for the rest of the day?”

“We were thinking about going to the American Museum of Natural History, MJ’s never been and neither have I.” Katherine was clearly excited and Rafael had to bite his lip to keep his smile from getting too big.

“Care if I join you?”

“I’d like that.”

 

They found a restaurant close to the hospital so they wouldn’t have to worry about the travel time as they ate.

“How has it been taking MJ to see her mom everyday?” Rafael more huffed than asked since Amber Stacker, despite being somewhat cooperative, had still managed to belligerently cuss out every member of SVU at some point during her case.

“It’s gone surprisingly well. Amber has thanked me for letting MJ stay with me every time I take MJ to her room. She’s been nothing but nice to me.”

“Really?”

“I’m as surprised as you are, but she mentioned something about growing up in foster care and seems relieved MJ isn’t stuck in a group home.”

“I didn’t get the impression she cared about MJ.” He huffed.

“Before seeing them together I would have said the same thing, but I think she’s doing the best she can the only way she knows how... People are complicated.” Katherine shrugged.

“You’re the one who called DCS on her.” Rafael smirked.

“And I’d do it again if I saw something warranting a call, but not based on what I’ve seen this week.”

“You’re very easily persuaded to advocate for someone.” He chuckled.

“I prefer to find the good in people.” Katherine sighed, pursing her lips slightly as she shrugged. It had always been her fear that that was one of the reasons she had kept finding excuses to not leave Scott.

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.” Rafael smirked.

“I love you.” She smiled.

“I know.” He replied, laughing when she rolled her eyes.

 


	26. Chapter 26

 

MJ was set to return home Thursday, leaving her with just one night left with Katherine. Social services had set up a visitation schedule, much to Amber Stackers disapproval, to drop in an check on the state of things given the circumstances behind the events leading to Ambers hospitalization. Amber couldn’t do much about it considering DCS had been called on her multiple times in the past and if she wanted to keep MJ she had to agree to the visits.

“Hey MJ.” Katherine said, glancing up from the student files she was making notes in for the teacher who would have them next.

“Yeah.” MJ lifted her nose from the book she was reading. At this point it was a good week into May and neither Katherine nor Ms. Winters were assigning much homework as their end of the year workload increased and the academic year wound down.

“I wanted to let you know that I’m moving this summer.” She had debated telling MJ this for a good week now, but she finally decided it would be best. She would feel terrible if MJ came looking for her and she wasn’t here.

“You’re moving in with Mr. Barba?”

“I am.” Katherine gave her a soft smile. “Amanda lives in my building. We talked and if you ever find yourself in a similar situation you can always go to her. She works crazy hours and may not be home but you can try her apartment if you’re more comfortable with that than asking for help in the coffee shop or something. Apartment 5H, ok?”

“I honestly didn’t even think about the coffee shop.” MJ sighed.

“I only mention it in case she’s not home.”

“5H?”

“I’ll show you which one it is on the way to school tomorrow.” Katherine smiled.

“Are you going to marry him?”

“Mr. Barba?” Katherine asked buying a little time since she didn’t exactly know how to answer.

“Who else?” MJ chuckled.

“We haven’t discussed it yet.” Katherine decided this was the safest answer.

“But you love him and you want to marry him?”

“MJ...” This was not a conversation she wanted to have, especially with a ten year old.

“You do love him right?”

“Yes, I love him.”

“Then is it the marriage thing? I thought that’s what happened when you loved someone... you eventually get married.” MJ looked confused. She only had the books she had read and the occasional movie to base her understanding on, her mothers constant string of ‘friends’ being something MJ knew wasn’t right.

“It’s a bit more complicated than that...”

“So you don’t want to marry him?” MJ interrupted.

“I didn’t say that.” Katherine covered her mouth out of shock at how quickly and adamantly the words had escaped her lips.

“I’m confused.” MJ sighed, her brow furrowing even more when Katherine began to giggle. “What’s funny?”

“Nothing.” Katherine chuckled, unsuccessfully trying to stop her laugher.

“Something’s funny...” MJ muttered.

“I’m laughing at myself.” Katherine was still trying to get her breathing under control, but had managed to stop uncontrollably giggling.

“Why?”

Considering how well the first one had worked out, Katherine hadn’t really thought about getting married again. Sure Rafael had joked about having a ring, but as far as she knew he had only been teasing her. Part of her had thought she’d be fine to never marry again... marriage wouldn’t make her love him anymore than she already did. She just hadn’t expected to be quite so firm in her response when MJ asked if she didn’t want to marry Rafael.

“I just...” Katherine chuckled and shook her head, “I guess I do want to marry him... eventually... it’s just not something we’ve discussed yet.”

“If you do get married, can I come to the wedding?”

“I’m not sure I’d do a wedding again, just elope and get it over with.” Katherine grumbled, thinking more about how micromanaging her mother had been during her wedding with Scott than the fact that the fact that MJ was sitting next to her.

“You’ve been married before?”

Katherine closed her eyes and exhaled. “It feels like a lifetime ago now, but yes.”

“What happened?”

“He ended up not being a very nice man.”

“Did he hit you?”

“No... you know how we talked in class about bullying and how it doesn’t always mean someone has physically hurt you... that it can be words too?”

MJ nodded.

“He could be like that at times.”

“How could anyone be mean to you?” MJ said, leaning over to give Katherine a side hug.

“I really don’t think it had anything to do with me.” It had taken Katherine a long time to actually believe that herself.

“I’m glad you’re with Rafael now. He’s really nice.”

Katherine let out a little huff of a laugh. “Yes, yes he is.”

“I wish it could stay like this.” MJ sighed.

“Stay like what?”

MJ got quiet for a moment. “Never mind, I didn’t actually mean that.”

“Didn’t mean what?”

“It’s just been nice being here... it’s quiet, calm... I can think and don’t have to worry about whether I should spend ten more minutes at the coffee shop because my mom’s ‘friend’ might not have left yet. I love my mom though... I didn’t mean I wish I could still live with you or anything. I just meant I wish things could be this routine with her.”

“She’s been different than I expected when we visit her in the hospital.”

“That’s because she isn’t drinking... I told you she’s only mean when she drinks.”

“Do you think she’ll go back to drinking when she gets out of the hospital?”

MJ sighed and shrugged her shoulders slightly. “She’s really not that bad if I stay out of the way.”

“You shouldn’t have to stay out of the way.” Katherine huffed.

 

Katherine made the short walk home from work alone for the first time in almost two weeks. Amber had actually picked MJ up from school on time. Her arm was in a cast and she still had light bruising on her cheek and around her eye, but other than that she was getting around pretty well. Katherine dragged herself slowly up the stairs to her apartment, her shoulders heavy with both her work bags and worry.

She slipped her key into the lock, turning it, her mind so distracted with thoughts of what MJ’s home life would be like now that she didn’t notice the door was already unlocked.

“Jesus!” She blurted, halfway jumping out of her skin when she opened the door to find Rafael cooking in her kitchen.

“I told you I’d make dinner tonight.” He smirked, watching her adjust the bags that had fallen off her shoulders.

“Yes, but when you texted asking when I was leaving and I said now, I thought you were heading my way, not already here.” Katherine chuckled, mostly at the fact that she still felt a bit startled.

“I texted because it was getting late and I wanted to know when to start cooking.”

“What time is it?” Katherine had had a staff meeting after school, finished with her student files, entered grades, and started packing up the things she knew she wouldn’t use until the next school year for summer cleaning. Most of it in an attempt to distract her mind from picturing MJ sitting in the dilapidated apartment she had returned to.

“Almost eight.”

Katherine sighed, locked her front door, and set her bags on the floor. “I’m so sorry, I lost track of time. You must be hungry.” She moved into her small kitchen and wrapped her arms around his waist, leaning her head against his chest.

“I snacked on some Cheez-its.” Rafael returned her embrace until she shifted, moving herself to just outside the kitchen so he could finish cooking. “Are you ok?”

“Yeah...”

Rafael flattened his lips into a line and lifted a brow at her.

“I just wish I knew for sure MJ would be ok with her mom. I’m not really worried about right now... DCS is doing scheduled checks and Amber really isn’t in any condition to have a ‘friend’ over... but what happens after some time has passed. I hate to think that after everything that happened Amber would put herself and MJ at risk again, but she doesn’t really know anything else.” Katherine sighed and plopped down on her couch.

“That’s what DCS is there for, to check in and make sure Amber is doing the best she can for MJ. If they don’t feel it’s safe they’ll remove her.” Rafael assured her.

“I know...”

Rafael frowned as Katherine stared blankly at her coffee table, worried she had gotten too attached to her student. “MJ’s a bright kid, she came to you for help when she needed it and you two talked about her going to Amanda after you move... she’ll be ok.”

“I hope so...” Katherine sighed. “She said something last night about how she wished it could stay like this.”

“Like she wanted to stay with you.”

“Yeah, I mean she backed tracked really quickly. She loves her mom, she just meant the stability... but part of me wanted her to stay.”

“Katherine...”

“I said part of me. I would never want to keep her from her mom, not after seeing how happy they both were when they were together in the hospital. I just wish I could guarantee she’d be safe, that she’d get to accomplish all the things she wants to.”

Rafael set down the wooden spoon he was stirring veggies with and lowered the heat so he could sit next to her. “I wish I could tell you for sure that she’d be safe, but...”

“I know...” Katherine pushed up her bottom lip and let out a little puff of air. “Can we talk about something else?”

“Sure,” Rafael smiled, racking his brain for something besides his work to distract her. “I’m taking Johnny D to court in a few weeks.” He said when nothing else came to mind.

“He’s that sex trafficker from that case with that undercover cop that Amanda slept with?” Katherine asked, her mind immediately going to Amanda pregnancy.

“Yeah... that’s what you remember?” Rafael chuckled.

“You don’t like to talk about work so I make my connections where I can.” Katherine smirked. “Will he be at the trial?”

“Who, Declan?”

“Yes.”

“Doubtful. It could blow his cover and if the girls cooperate I shouldn’t need him.” Rafael shrugged. “Why?”

“I was just curious if it’d be awkward or something for Amanda.” That was a lie, she was curious if Amanda would tell Declan she was pregnant, but she couldn’t tell Rafael that.

“Amanda doesn’t strike me as the type to become awkward just because she slept with someone.” Rafael chuckled.

Katherine chuckled with him, not wanting him to question her interest in Declan and Amanda further. Amanda would undoubtably be showing soon, but until then she would keep her secret. If he asked who the father was she’d tell him, she knew he wouldn’t say anything if she asked him not to.

Rafael continued the conversation with details on the case, something he rarely did with Katherine, but it seemed to be working to distract her. He kept his own secrets from her, though just as Katherine’s secrets weren’t her own, neither were his. He just felt that Liv’s adoption of Noah would be too similar a topic to MJ to bring up the fact that he had found out that Johnny D was Noah’s biological father. Otherwise, he would have expressed how annoyed he was that she was insisting on listing him on the adoption paperwork.

They watched a movie together after dinner, Katherine missing half of it as she continued to work, and then cuddled up in her bed.

“I really missed this.” Katherine grinned, easing herself closer to him as he spooned her, his arms wrapping around her waist.

“Me too.” He squeezed her tighter and then relaxed his arms again.

Katherine took one of his hands in hers and drifted off feeling more complete than she had in weeks.

 

They spent the weekends at Rafael’s place and then he’d pack what he’d need for the week to sleep at hers. He figured with as much as she lugged back and forth daily and the late hours she was working it would be best to sleep at her place during the week.

“You know I will survive if you need to sleep at home one night.” Katherine chuckled as she got ready for school, watching Rafael from her mirror as he frantically searched for the tie he wanted.

“I promised I’d sleep with you until you moved in with me and I intend to keep that promise.” He smirked, pulling the tie from the bottom of the suitcase he had packed.

“Even if that’s literally all we do.”

Most nights they had arrived at her place within thirty minutes of each other, Rafael bringing her something to go from whatever restaurant he had grabbed a bite at the bar of while continuing to work. More often than not she had taken what he brought to eat for lunch the next since she was more tired than hungry by the time she got home.

The last week had been the extremely busy for both of them. The end of school activities were in overdrive and Katherine felt like she spent her day herding cats around the school and her evening packing, but she wanted to get her room finished so her summer could start and she could focus on packing her apartment. For Rafael the trial for Johnny D had started and hadn’t been going so well.

“Believe it or not, but I sleep better with you next to me.” He smiled, kissing her shoulder as he snuck up behind her.

“So do I.” Katherine leaned back, pressing herself against his chest. “I forgot to ask last night, but did yesterday go better?”

“It did. The girls got on the stand and told the jury exactly what he did to them. They buried him.” Rafael exhaled, his hands reaching up to gently rub her shoulders.

“That’s good,” she lightly moaned, “remind me to get you to continue this when you’re trial is over.”

Rafael chuckled and patted her shoulders. “How’s MJ?”

“She says everything’s good. We’ve gone back to our old routine with her hanging out in my classroom each morning and she seems happier than I’ve seen her all year so I’m going to have to believe her.” Katherine sighed.

“But...”

“But summer starts in a little over a week and then I’ll have no way of knowing that she’s ok.”

“You’re going to have to trust DCS, that’s what they’re there for.”

“I know.” Katherine huffed and pushed her bottom lip up.

Rafael smiled and shook his head while leaning in to kiss her before they both had to get to work.

“Will the defense start presenting their case today?”

“Probably,” Rafael sighed, “Judge Barth adjourned court after I walked Ariel through her testimony, defense gets to cross examine her this morning. She was my last witness though.”

 

Katherine’s day moved along like every other day that week. Her students were restless, making her long for the upcoming half days in the following week, and she may or may not have taken them to recess a few minutes early that day. She typically lived in a bubble at school, and while she always had her phone on her in case of emergency, she rarely looked at it throughout the day, especially on a day like today when most of her energy was spent on maintaining some sibilance of classroom management.

It wasn’t until she sat down at her desk to decompress after her kids were dismissed that she glanced at her phone. At least five news notifications filled her lock screen all containing a similar title... Two dead, multiple wounded this morning during the trial of accused sex trafficker Johnny D.

Katherine’s stomach dropped. Her fingers shook as she pressed her contact for Rafael. “Pick up, pick up, pick up...” she whispered softly, listening to the rings.

“Katherine?”

“Thank God!” She exhaled, wiping tears she hadn’t even noticed form from her cheek.

“What’s the matter?” Rafael was now the one sounding concerned.

“I’m fine, what happened at court today?”

“Jesus, I’m sorry. I meant to call you and then I got pulled into McCoy’s office and bombarded with paperwork and...”

“You forgot.” Katherine chuckled.

“I’m really sorry.”

“It’s ok. I’m sure today was hectic. I’m just glad you’re...” she couldn’t bring herself to finish her original thought, “that you answered.”

“Me too.” He exhaled.

“What happened?”

“Some of Johnny’s girls made a big scene in court, then he took a court officers gun and started shooting.” Rafael sighed.

Katherine was almost afraid to ask, but she had to know... Amanda, the other detectives she had met... she knew they had all been at the trial. “Who was hurt?” She assumed if Amanda had been he would have called her. Now that she wasn’t so panicked and actually thought about it, she knew Amanda would have called her if Rafael had been hurt.

“Nick was shot, he’s going to be ok though. A CO and Judge Barth were hit in the shoulder... The CO he took the gun from didn’t make it and Johnny D was the other casualty.”

“I should call Amanda.”

“Ok... hey Katherine, I love you.” He hadn’t said it that morning and after the day he had had there was no way he was letting her go without saying it now.

“I love you too Raf.”


	27. Chapter 27

 

Katherine waved at Amanda as she approached the table Katherine had been sitting at for maybe five minutes. They had planned to meet at two for lunch, but Katherine had ended up getting there a bit early.

“Am I late?” Amanda asked checking her watch.

“No, I was packing a box, trying to figure out what else could go in it before sealing it and after twenty minutes of just staring at it, I finally moved the box aside and decided to leave a bit early. I should have told Raf I’d move in July or something...” Katherine grumbled.

“You’d still have to pack if you moved in July.” Amanda chuckled.

“Yes, but I wouldn’t have just finished packing up my classroom... there would have been a break between cramming crap in boxes.”

The school year had ended less than a week before and while Katherine had finished finalizing her classroom, her apartment was proving to be a bit more challenging. They had spent the better part of an evening moving all of her clothes and toiletries to Rafael’s so she could start sleeping there without having to go home for anything. It was easier to sleep at his place now that she was no longer on a schedule.

“Are you getting rid of stuff?”

“I’m pairing down a bit as I pack, but I’ve always been better about getting rid of things I don’t need when unpacking vs. packing.” Katherine shrugged.

“That makes no sense.”

“While packing I always feel rushed and end up throwing things in boxes. When I unpack I’m more relaxed and that’s when I will take the time to actually go through things.”

“I guess.” Amanda smiled.

“How’s Nick doing?” Katherine asked as the waitress sat down the margarita she had ordered.

Amanda eyed it and ordered a water, both of them going ahead and placing their lunch orders.

“He’s good, for the most part... the knees a problem when it comes to work.” She sighed.

“Yeah, but they have desk jobs... it’s not like he can’t keep working.”

“No one wants to be on indefinite desk duty. Well... except maybe Fin.” Amanda chuckled.

“What’s he going to do then?” Katherine took a sip of her drink and Amanda huffed slightly.

“You know you could avoid alcohol while I’m pregnant.”

“Why, I’m not pregnant.” Katherine grinned.

“Because it’s not fair.”

“You’ll live.” Katherine chuckled, taking another sip. “So... Nick?”

“He’s going to retire.” Amanda shrugged while tearing at her napkin.

“Retire? Isn’t he a little young?”

“He can keep part of his pension this way and he’s planning on working private security once he gets to California.”

“He’s leaving?”

“It’s where his kids are.” Amanda shrugged again, this time dropping little bits of her napkin on the table.

“I’m sorry Amanda...”

“Eh, it is what it is.”

“You ok?”

“What does it matter if I am or I’m not... he’s excited about the move.” Amanda grumbled, while wadding what was left of her napkin into a tight ball.

“I’m sorry.”

“I’ll survive... we had just gotten back to a good place I guess. It’s probably for the best since we’re both too stubborn for that to have lasted.”

Katherine sat quietly sipping on her drink for a moment, her mind briefly going to last New Years when she and Rafael had ended up spending the evening with Amanda and Carisi.

“What are you smiling at?” Amanda asked furrowing her brow.

“Nothing.” Katherine smirked.

Amanda glared at her for a moment. “What?”

“I just think you and Sonny get along pretty well.”

“How many of those have you had?” Amanda huffed while pointing at her margarita.

“I’m serious. He’s sweet and considerate without being a pushover.”

“You date him then.”

“I’m perfectly happy with Rafael, but I really do think you should consider it... not now obviously. Wait until after you’re showing and this thing with Nick settles.” Katherine took another drink of her margarita, grinning up at Amanda from her straw.

“I am not dating Carisi.”

“If you say so.” Katherine replied, continuing to grin at her.

 

“Back here!” Katherine called out when she heard Rafael enter her apartment.

“You’ve made progress.” He smirked as he sat on the edge of her bed.

“Yeah,” she smiled, “I got on a roll and before I knew it shelves were empty and boxes were mostly filled.”

The kitchen was packed, sorted to be moved or to be donated, the living room shelves were bare and entertainment console empty, and she was packing what she assumed would be the last box in her bedroom. All that was left was the bathroom and considering most of her things were already in his bathroom she wasn’t too worried about it.

“I can schedule the movers for this weekend.” Rafael suggested.

“We have Noah’s adoption party thing.”

“That’s right... I think I got excited about you actually being officially moved in.” He chuckled, pulling her up from the floor and onto the bed with him.

“I already called anyway, they’re coming tomorrow.” Katherine smiled, laying back on the bed whenhe did.

“We’ll live together, officially, tomorrow?” Rafael smirked, his hand slipping under her shirt.

“Rafael... I’m dusty and grimy.” Katherine half chuckled half whined as his hand unclasped her bra.

“You look good sweaty.” He grinned as she pulled the bra off from under her shirt.

“I didn’t say sweaty...” She grumbled.

Rafael chuckled and lifted her shirt enough to suck on her breast, kissing between them as he moved from one to the other.

“Is this what living with you is going to be like? No more hello kiss, just straight for what you’re really after.” Katherine giggled, while tugging his tie loose.

“I’m sorry.” Rafael smiled, lifting himself so that they were face to face. “Hi,” he smirked and then rather dramatically pressed his lips to hers.

“You’re ridiculous, you know that?”

She was still laughing when he kissed back down to her chest, his hands unfastening her jeans while she worked the buttons on his shirt. Katherine’s hands tugged his shirt from his slacks, pushing it along with his suspenders over his shoulders.

They were both disrobed by the time Rafael’s lips were on hers again, her fingers dragging through his hair as she moved to cup his cheeks.

“You locked the door, right?”

“I did.” He breathed while adjusting himself to her entrance.

Katherine pulled him back to her lips as he buried himself inside her. This was one aspect of their relationship that she hoped would never change. Not necessarily the fact that they had sex, but that they always seemed to be on the same page about it. Nothing was overthought, just two people completely in sync with each other. She honestly didn’t know if he was extremely good at what he did or if they just enjoyed the same things.

“Fuck, I love...” She panted, her voice cutting out as she pushed back into him when he hit a particularly euphoric spot. Maybe he was actually that good.

“Me or this?”

“Both.” She gasped her neck arching back as her fingers curled into his hair.

“I can live with that.” Rafael chuckled, bringing his lips to her shoulder, sucking a light love bite across her clavicle.

Their early evening romp continued on Katherine’s bare mattress, the sheets having been packed away the day before, the bed itself surrounded by brown boxes, some of which had yet to be taped shut.

“Do you enjoy that as much as I do?” Katherine exhaled as she cuddle herself closer to him, stealing a bit of his warmth as they spooned.

“What do you think?” Rafael chuckled.

Katherine shifted in his arms so she could actually see his face. “No... I mean... is it better?”

Rafael bit back the smirk threatening to form. “Better?” He failed at his feeble attempt at stopping the smirk after he spoke.

“Never mind.” Katherine grumbled, turning away from him again.

“Katherine,” Rafael grinned forcing her to face him again, “you cannot stroke my ego and then not expect me to be at least a little self congratulatory.”

“That’s a nice way of saying smug...”

Rafael chuckled causing Katherine to roll her eyes. “I’m sorry. You’re really cute when you’re annoyed.”

“And on that note I’m going to finish packing.” She huffed and started to pull herself from his arms.

“Wait...” Rafael tugged her back to him wrapping his legs around hers when she protested. “I only smirked because I knew what you meant.”

“Really?” She scoffed. “Then what did I mean?”

“That’s it’s better.” He smirked again, nudging her chin upward only to be met with a less than amused expression on her face. “We fit together nicely.”

Katherine frowned.

“I don’t mean physically, though I wont deny that’s part of it, I mean there’s a connection between us. Whether we are doing what we just did or if I can only hear your voice on the other end of the phone. It’s there all the time. That connection makes it better... it makes everything better.”

“A connection?”

“Yes, a connection.”

Katherine chuckled and adjusted so she could kiss him. “I love you.”

“You seemed a bit annoyed with me a moment ago.” Rafael smirked.

“Yeah well, you’re cute when you’re annoying.” Katherine grinned.

 

Katherine hadn’t been back to her apartment in three days. She planned to do one last walk through before handing in keys on Monday, but today was Saturday and they had Liv’s party so she figured she’d drag Rafael with her to do it on Sunday.

“Are you ready?” Rafael asked stepping around a box as he entered his room to see if she had finally picked out an outfit.

She was almost unpacked. Rafael had shifted things around so she could fit her books on the shelves in his office and the things she had brought from her kitchen were nestled amongst his drawers. It was really down to the box Rafael had dodged in the bedroom... the one she wasn’t quite sure what to do with the contents of.

“I am.” Katherine smiled, stepping out of the bathroom in a blue and grey floral printed mid length wrap dress that fastened at the waist with a tie.

“You look...”

“Thank you.” She smirked, pushing the box out of the walkway as they passed it.

“Is that the only one you have left?”

“Yeah, I’m just not sure what I where I want to put what’s inside it yet.” She shrugged.

“What’s in it? Maybe I can help.”

“Just yearbooks and old photo albums... other mementos like that.”

“I’m sure we can make room in the office, maybe get a little shelf for by your couch, or we could get something that has doors and find a spot in the living room.” Rafael suggested, taking her hand as he guided her out of his room.

“We’ll see... Did you grab the gift?”

“It’s sitting on your old media console by the door.” He smirked.

“You like that I’m here.” Katherine chuckled.

“I really do.”

 

Carisi let them in to Liv’s apartment when they knocked and they joined Fin, Liv, and Lucy in the living room.

“Rafa, Kate. I’m glad you could both make it.” Liv smiled.

“We wouldn’t have missed it Liv.” Rafael said returning the smile while giving her a hug.

“Yes, congratulations.” Katherine smiled, keeping her words brief so as to not seem overly familiar. She knew Liv from the few interactions they had had at the precinct and the occasional dinner with Rafael, but with as much as he talked about her... and Amanda talked about her... she felt like she knew her better than she actually did.

“How’s MJ?” Liv asked as she handed Rafael a Scotch and Katherine a Martini.

“She said everything was going well with her mom, that she had found a waitressing job, but now that school is out for summer I can’t check in on her as much as I’d like.” Katherine sighed.

“Do you bond like this with all your students?” Carisi questioned.

“I build relationships with my kids, they need a certain amount of trust in their teachers, I work hard at that, but I’ve never bonded with a student as much as I have with MJ.” Katherine shrugged.

“She’s a good kid.” Liv smiled.

There was a knock at the door pulling everyone’s attention and Katherine took the opportunity to take a large sip of her drink. She had lost sleep worrying about how MJ was doing. Rafael noticed and gave her hand a gentle squeeze as Liv greeted Nick and Amanda. The group chatted a bit about Noah and their personal lives, leaving work for the most part out of the conversation.

“When does he leave?” Katherine whispered to Amanda when Nick and Liv left the group to speak in the kitchen.

“Two weeks.”

“You two came together?”

“We’re taking advantage of what we can when we can.” Amanda shrugged.

“Have you told him?” Katherine subtly gestured to Amanda’s stomach and she shook her head.

“What’s the point?”

“Well... for starters you might want to let him know so he doesn’t freak out and think it’s his if he finds out from someone else.” Katherine said soft enough that only Amanda could hear her.

“I’ll tell him before he leaves.” Amanda sighed, conceding that Katherine had a point.

“What are you two whispering about?” Carisi grinned, plopping down next to Amanda.

“Girl stuff.” Katherine smiled.

“Yeah ok.” Carisi replied sarcastically. “You want a drink?” The question was directed only to Rollins and Katherine let an amused smile form.

“Water’s fine.” Amanda shrugged.

“You sure? Liv’s got pretty much everything.”

“Yeah, my stomachs not feeling so great.” Amanda made a face to indicate discomfort.

“You want me to see if she has ginger ale? That’s always good for a tummy ache.” Carisi suggested.

“Sure.” Amanda shrugged.

Katherine was completely grinning now.

“What?” Amanda snapped.

“Oh come on... you can’t tell me he isn’t sweat.” Katherine whispered.

“He’s not my type.”

“Why? Because he’s attractive, considerate, and might not treat you like shit?”

“Because he says things like tummy ache...” Amanda muttered.

Katherine rolled her eyes. “Fine, do it your way.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You ever think that maybe you purposefully pick guys that aren’t good for you so you can avoid being disappointed when it doesn’t work out?”

“I’m upset that Nick is leaving.” Amanda countered.

“You’re not that upset... I’ve seen you upset.”

Amanda opened her mouth to speak a few times and finally gave up, choosing instead to glare at Katherine.

“Don’t give me that look just because you know I’m right.” Katherine chuckled.

“I’m still not dating Carisi.” Amanda huffed.

“Ok.” Katherine smiled.

“Can I join or is it still girl talk?” Carisi asked, handing Amanda a ginger ale.

“You can join.” Katherine smiled, chuckling a bit when Amanda mouthed the words “I hate you.”

 


	28. Chapter 28

 

“How’s living with Barba?” Amanda asked while entering Rafael’s apartment for the first time.

“It’s been really easy. When I initially agreed to move in I was set on standing my ground on things I didn’t want to change about my daily routine, but...”

“What would you have to change about your daily routine?” Amanda interrupted as she glanced around the living room.

“Well... I haven’t actually had to change anything.”

“I meant why would you think you would need to?”

“The only other man I’ve ever lived with was Scott. He expected me up in the mornings if he was and hated it if I wanted to stay up and watch TV after he went to bed... he claimed he could hear it even though I knew he couldn’t because I could barely hear it and our bedroom was on the other side of the house.” Katherine muttered.

“You think I go for guys that I know aren’t good for me, but you go for obstinate men.” Amanda chuckled.

“Rafael isn’t obstinate.”

“He is at work.”

“He’s not with me. I haven’t had to change anything, that’s what I was trying to say. If I want to stay up too late watching a movie while cutting out the things I spent my morning laminating I can. Rafael just gives me a kiss good night and goes to bed. No guilt trip. No complaining about me waking him up when I eventually do crawl in bed with him. He just rolls over and tugs me into his arms. In the mornings he lets me sleep and either sends me a text or leaves a note telling me good morning. Nothing has changes about my summer routine from when I lived alone except for the fact that he’s there.” Katherine smiled.

“And this place... I had no idea Barba’s apartment was this nice.” Amanda wasn’t really looking at the apartment anymore, more at the view out his living room window.

“He moved here when he transferred from Brooklyn.”

“He has’t lived here that long then,” Amanda said, turning to join Katherine in the kitchen. “Does he know you invited me over for lunch?”

Katherine rolled her eyes at the grin on Amanda’s face. “Yes. He said you’re welcomed whenever I want since it’s my place too.”

“You chip in then?” Amanda lifted a brow knowing Katherine’s teacher salary wouldn’t cover much.

“Rafael used savings to pay a lot of this place off up front so his monthly expenses aren’t as high as you might expect, but in answer to your question... no, I don’t chip in on the apartment itself. We discussed the monthly living expenses and I chose a few bills to cover. It’s a little more than half of what I was paying living on my own but this way we both spend a bit less each month.”

“Who does the grocery shopping?” Amanda chuckled as she watched Katherine pull out food to prepare for their lunch.

“We go together.”

“You go together?”

Katherine nodded. It was one her favorite things they had started doing over the last few weeks of living together. They would sit at the kitchen island while making their list and then both wandered around the store hand in hand, trading off each trip on who paid.

“I can’t picture Barba in a grocery store.”

“Why not, he’s a fantastic cook.”

“He cooks?”

“Extremely well.” Katherine smiled.

“You think you know someone.” Amanda chuckled.

Katherine rolled her eyes and turned to the stove to start the water boiling while she prepped the rest of the ingredients for the pasta she was making.

“Where is Barba anyway?”

“He’s finishing up some paperwork from whatever case you just worked. He said he shouldn’t be too long and that he’d join us for lunch.”

“He should be home any time then?” Amanda asked.

“Yes, why?”

“I was just hoping I had ran him out of his own home.” Amanda grinned and Katherine rolled her eyes again.

 

“Fuck Raf...” Katherine panted as he thrust into her from behind.

If it was possible, they seemed to be having more sex lately. Maybe it was the proximity to each other every night... or the fact that Katherine was off from work, allowing Rafael to sneak out of the office on slow afternoons just to ravage her. Whatever the reason behind it, the two couldn’t seem to get enough of the other.

Katherine’s body shuddered, her upper body collapsing on to the bed as her insides constricted around him. Rafael slowed his momentum, kissing her shoulder as he pulled from her and rolled her to her back, entering her again so he could finish himself while continuing to kiss her. Her hands tugged at his hair when he finally grunted his release, his body coming to rest against hers.

“I love you Katherine.” He breathed, pushing up to kiss her again.

“I... love you... too.” She managed in the moments between when their lips were connected. Both of them chuckling slightly once she got it out, though it didn’t lessen the kiss, if anything they depended it, Rafael’s hands moving to caress her face.

“We should get married.” He hummed as his lips moved down her neck.

“What?” Katherine’s eyes were wide, but she didn’t sound panicked yet... she had thought she must have misheard him.

“We should get married.”

“Rafael...”

He could hear the hesitation in her voice, but it didn’t deter him, instead he pulled himself up to look at her. “I’m serious, marry me.”

“You don’t mean that.” She whispered, her eyes locked with his.

“I do though... I’ve been drawn to you since the moment I saw you fighting back tears at the precinct... I can’t explain it. Anyone else I would have passed without saying a word to, assuming that they’d prefer to be alone in that moment to regain composure. Not you. I had to know what caused you to be so upset, I had an uncontrollable urge to fix it. I needed to see you smile.”

“I’m pretty sure you managed that.” Katherine smiled, running her hand through his hair.

“Yes and then you told me you would be returning to Atlanta and I thought my heart had stopped.”

“Thankfully it didn’t.”

“Thankfully you moved.” He smirked.

“Amanda suggested it and then it was like the planets aligned. I had both a job lined up and an apartment rented before I headed back to Atlanta...”

“See... we were meant to find one another... marry me.”

“Rafael... you don’t propose during sex. You...” Katherine climbed out of bed, redressing in her shirt and panties from earlier, pausing as she thought. She really didn’t know what she thought he should have done so she went with the stereotypical course of action. “You buy a ring and plan some ridiculous over the top cutesy way of asking.”

Rafael followed her out of bed, slipping on his boxer briefs and a blue button up. “I have a ring.”

“You what?”

Rafael took her hand, quickly guiding her to his study. “You think I haven’t thought about this, that I just randomly decided I wanted to marry you and nothing could be further from the truth.” He stopped them at the closet door so he could open it, stepped inside to get to the safe, only to return a moment later with a small ring box in his hand. “I have a ring.”

Katherine glanced at the box and then at him. “Rafael...”

“I love you Katherine. I think I’ve known it since the day I met you. I definitely knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you the moment I walked up to the table at that bar a year later to find you sitting next to Rollins. It’s insane, I know... but I have never been so sure of anything in my life. Marry me.”

Katherine stopped him from opening the box. “Rafael...”

“Will you at least look at it?”

“No,” She chuckled, “but will you let me actually speak?”

“I’m kind of afraid to.”

“All I’m asking for is a moment to think.”

Rafael nodded and stood silently watching her as she stared at the floor.

“I can no longer picture my life without you in it.” He blurted after less than a minute.

“Rafael.” Katherine sighed, despite the hint of a smile tugging at her lips because his statement was strikingly similar to the thought she had just had. “Do you really think you should have to do this much talking to convince someone you were destined to be with to agree to marry you?”

“When they’re a bit skittish, yes.”

“I’m skittish?” Katherine chuckled.

“Very much so.” He smirked.

Katherine couldn’t help but smile at him. “It’s barely been a year...”

“I know.”

“Oh... you don’t have a counter for that.” She laughed.

“You’re my complement. If you want to wait we can, I just want you to know where I am in this.”

Katherine was silent as she thought again.

“So...” Rafael questioned with one eyebrow elevated.

“Ok.” She nodded, moving closer to him.

“Ok you’ll marry me?”

“Yes.” Katherine pressed up to kiss him, her arms wrapping around his waist.

“Are you sure, you haven’t even seen the ring.” Rafael chuckled as he pulled back to look at her.

“I don’t give a shit about the ring.” She grinned pushing up to kiss him again.

Rafael depend the embrace, tugging her tighter to him. “Are you absolutely sure?” He exhaled, pulling back to look at her again, his fingers playing with the ends of her hair.

“You just spent twenty minutes convincing me to marry you and now you’re trying to talk me out of it...” Katherine chuckled.

“It was closer to five minutes...”

“Does the length of time really matter?”

“I want you to be sure. I’m sure, but I’ve also been thinking about it for a while now...”

“Apparently.” She smirked.

Rafael rolled his eyes. “If you need more time...”

“I don’t.”

“But if you do...”

“Because I’m skittish.” Katherine chuckled.

“I just want you to be as sure as I am.” Rafael smiled, grazing his thumb across her cheek.

“I am.” She assured him, brushing her lips against his softly.

Rafael pulled the small box between them as he opened it to free the ring. The empty box was set on his desk as he slid the ring on her finger. Katherine hadn’t known what to expect, she had picked out her own engagement ring last time. She had always thought that ring had been perfect... it was part of the reason she hadn’t wanted to see what he had picked before she made her decision. Her old ring had been simple, a single princess cut diamond set on a solid thin band of white gold, even the wedding band had been solid. The only thing that she had left to Scott had been the size of the diamond itself, since that was where most of the cost of the ring went. She had guessed, based on what they had looked at together that the diamond was closer to two carats than three, but she had never bothered to asked.

The ring Rafael slid on her finger had tiny diamonds in the band, making the white gold they were set in seem to disappear, the setting itself had even smaller diamonds tracing up what resembled petals leading up to the prongs. From above the setting wasn’t visible, appearing to be a simple solitaire, but from the side the detail gave it an almost vintage feel. The single round cut diamond sitting on top was comparable in size to her old ring, but she wouldn’t venture a guess at the carat. She really hadn’t thought he’d find something she would think was prettier than the ring she had picked out, but he had. It was far more delicate and intricate than she had imagined before he opened the box, and as with everything about her relationship with him, it made her reevaluate her perception of perfect.

“I saw it and immediately thought of you.” He smiled. “Do you like it?”

“It’s perfect.” She breathed as she looked at it on her finger.

“How does it fit? I didn’t know what size, but they assured me it could be adjusted if need be.”

“It fits perfectly.” It definitely wouldn’t fall off, but it was loose enough to swing a bit on her finger... she hated rings that dug into the skin, even slightly.

“That’s lucky.” Rafael smirked, lifting her hand to inspect it himself.

“How long have you had it?”

“Too long.” He chuckled.

“Really, when did you buy it?” She pushed.

“February...” Rafael blushed.

“You’ve had this for four months?”

“I had taken my watch in for a new battery, something they had in stock so I decided to wait while they changed it. I was just looking... not at anything in particular... that’s when I saw this.” He lifted her hand. “It looked like you. It was perfect. I ended up spending another two hours in that store finalizing the purchase of your ring in addition to my watch battery.” He chuckled.

“It looked like me?” Katherine smirked.

“You know what I mean.”

“It really is perfect.”

“You really do like it then?”

“I couldn’t have picked something better for myself.” She smiled. It was truthfully the most honest statement she could have given him.


	29. Chapter 29

 

Time had somehow shifted them into July and Katherine still hadn’t unpacked that last box. Instead she had tried to hide it in the closet, but given how organized the closet was it ended up sitting quite noticeably in the corner. Rafael hadn’t said anything. He had definitely noticed it sitting there, but given her OCD’s on everything having a place he felt there was a reason she hadn’t opened it yet. Still, she had lived there for close to a month...

“Hey Katherine...”

“Yes.” She smiled, poking her head in the closet from the bathroom where she had been brushing her teeth.

“Do you want to see if we can find something so you can unpack your last box while we’re out today?” It was Saturday and the only plans they had were to run a few errands, but from the look that briefly flashed across her face he could tell she had hoped he had forgotten about the box.

“Umm... I guess.”

Rafael’s curiosity got the better of him. “Lets open it and get a feel for what’s inside so we can get something everything will fit in. I’m sure you need another glance at it.” He knew she didn’t want to, that there was something in it she didn’t seem to want unpacked, but she had also agreed to marry him... she should be able to share with him whatever it was she was hiding away in that box.

“Oh... umm...” Katherine stammered as she tried to think of a reason to procrastinate dealing with the box a little longer.

“What is in there that’s causing you so much turmoil about me seeing it?” He chuckled, assuming he was why she had left it closed since he hadn’t noticed an unpacked box at her old apartment.

Katherine exhaled and dragged the box to the middle of the closet. “Mementos,” she shrugged, “do you have scissors or something?”

Rafael picked the box up and carried it out of the closet. “Let’s open it in the office, you’ll have more room to spread it out there.”

Katherine took a deep breath and followed him to the office, sitting on the couch so she could reach the box from where he had set it next to the coffee table.

“Here.” He smiled, handing her a pair of scissors as he sat next to her.

Katherine cut the tape and began pulling the contents from the box. Rafael picked up the first photo album and chuckled as he flipped through it. “How old are you in these?”

The one he had in his hands contained pictures of her and her friends when she was in elementary and junior high.

Katherine smiled. “That ones first through eighth grade.”

“Who are these people?” He was looking at a group photo of her and her best friends while in junior high, the group had remained close through high school.

“That’s Erin,” she said pointing to the short red hair girl in the middle of the photo, “and that’s Jessica, Dan, Rodger, Anna, Stacy, and me.” She continued pointing to each person as she named them.

“I knew which one you were.” Rafael smiled.

“They were my best friends all through high school and one of the reason I was so mad at my parents for moving me to Atlanta my senior year... One year was not enough time to make friends in a new school, especially when everyone was already set in their groupings and ready to graduate.” Katherine grumbled, pulling out the album from high school and handing it to him.

“You’re sitting on that Rodger guys lap.” Rafael smirked when he flipped to a picture clearly indicating she and Rodger had been more than friends.

“Awe, yes... Rodger,” Katherine smiled, “we were inseparable in high school. He was my first boyfriend... my first everything.”

“Everything?”

Katherine turned pink, she hadn’t really thought before she spoke, but he had been her first.

“How old were you?”

“Too young.” She sighed.

“That didn’t exactly answer my question.” Rafael smirked.

“Fifteen. I mean at the time I had thought I was mature enough, but looking back I know I wasn’t. How old were you?”

“Seventeen.” Rafael answered without going into detail. “Was he a good guy at least?”

“He was... is... he’s married now with three kids.” Katherine shrugged.

“You keep in touch?”

“No, not really... When I moved, we all tried to stay in touch, but it was before social media and I didn’t have a cell phone. We fell out of contact after a while. I’ve found most of them on Facebook, which is nice... I get to see where they are and what they did with their lives, but it’s not the same... not like we actually talk or anything.”

“Did you think you were going to marry him?” Rafael smirked.

“Of course I did, I was a ridiculous love struck teenager. We were seventeen when my parents moved me to Atlanta... I thought my heart was being ripped from me and left behind in Austin.” Katherine chuckled. “I grew up though... had my heart broken a few more times since then...”

“I’m sure you broke a few yourself.” He smiled.

“I doubt it.” She shrugged.

Rafael furrowed his brow, wondering why should would think that, not knowing that Amanda had been right when she said Katherine went for obstinate. She was attracted to assertive, determined men... but up till meeting Rafael they had mostly turned out to be controlling assholes like Scott... Rodger being the one exception.

“Is this the reason you didn’t want to open this box, because you were afraid to let me see the photos from your youth?”

“No.” Katherine sighed, pulling a keepsake box from the bottom of the moving box.

Rafael had seen the box in the top of her closet but had never really been curious as to what was inside. The intricately etched wood on the box was what had caught his attention more than anything.

“I haven’t opened this box in almost two years...” Katherine said, pushing it in front of him.

“You want me to?”

“I don’t want you to wonder what’s inside.” She shrugged.

Rafael opened the lid and flipped through a few pictures. “You look happy.” He said, pulling a picture out of the box. Scott had his arm around Katherine in the picture and they were laughing while walking along a beach somewhere.

“I was happy.”

Rafael flipped through a few more pictures before noticing the small bag with a piece of jewelry in it. “You’ve kept your wedding ring in a box in the top of your closet?” He sounded a bit shocked, but only because he could roughly estimate the monetary value having recently purchased the one currently sitting on her finger.

“I didn’t know what else to do with it,” she shrugged, “it didn’t seem right to sell it but it’s not like I’m going to wear it again either.”

“I just meant it should have been kept somewhere safer.”

“Oh... I wasn’t that concerned.”

“I know you said selling them didn’t feel right, but if you had hit a rough patch and needed money... have you had them appraised?”

“No, but I know roughly what he spent.” Rafael furrowed his brow so she elaborated. “I picked it out.”

“Oh...” He glanced at the ring and then the one he had given her.

“I like yours better.”

“How, if you picked this one out?”

“Because you apparently know me better than I know myself.” Katherine chuckled, but Rafael frowned. “I’m serious Raf. You actually thought about me... even if your intent hadn’t been to look at rings that day. You still saw it and thought of me. Scott and I had talked about getting married at some point, but he never really asked. He just took me to a jewelry store one day and then handed me the ring when it was ready. And yes I looked at lots of settings and different cuts, but I hadn’t really done research on what I wanted, just picked from what I was shown. I mean I loved this ring... but yours is better.”

“Because I gave it to you?” He questioned, still not quite believing her.

“No, because if I had been choosing between the two, even then, I would have chosen the one you picked. It’s softer... more dainty,” Katherine grinned at her use of the word dainty as she held her hand up to look at the ring again, “and I love the flowerlike prongs. They give the ring a period piece feel without being to over the top.”

“He really never actually asked you to marry him?”

“Not technically, no. It was just assumed I would.” Katherine shrugged.

“I feel a bit better about asking during sex now.” Rafael smirked.

“I’m learning that you’re passionate and if you feel strongly about something it will come out of your mouth whether you want it to or not.” Katherine chuckled, pulling herself closer to kiss him. “Once I realized you couldn’t help yourself, I found your proposal endearing.”

Rafael rolled his eyes despite the smile on his lips. “You can store your old one in the safe.” He handed her the little bag she had the ring in and took her hand guiding her into the closet. “Six... five... thirteen...” He said aloud as he turned the dial on the safe.

“Six, five, thirteen, huh?” Katherine smirked, handing him the bag when the door opened.

“You think you can remember it?”

“I’d be hard pressed to forget it.” She chuckled.

“Why is that?” Rafael was the one to smirk this time.

“It’s the day I kissed you outside the bullpen.”

“The day all of this started.” He smiled.

“How long has the combination been that date?”

“Long enough.” He smirked again, setting the little bag on a shelf so she could see where he had placed it. “You want to finish getting ready so we can eat?”

“Sure.” Katherine smiled, taking his hand in hers. She felt better now that the box was opened and they had talked. It was just the items from her failed marriage that had concerned her. She hadn’t wanted to get rid of the happier memories, but didn’t want him to think she was holding onto something either. It was just, as with everything in life... not black and white. Rafael, thankfully, seemed to understand that.

 

Katherine woke up when Rafael did that Monday and decided to go up to her school to see what she could get done in preparation for the next year. It seemed the week after the Fourth of July had left the school desolate of teachers trying to get materials made for the next year, all preferring to be home or off travailing instead. This allowed her to get two class sets of pages for her science journal made and organized into the plastic file bin she dedicated for it. It would be one less thing she would have to wait around for the copier for in the afternoons.The janitorial staff had finished with the hall her room was on so she had spent the first part of her morning arranging her desk into groups to give her areas to spread work out as she started setting the classroom back up. Her room looked a chaotic mess, but that was normal. It would take the better part of a month for it to resemble her classroom again. She enjoyed this bit of time every year when she got to reorganize her room, always attempting to find some magical arrangement that would easily keep it organized all year... it never actually happened though.

This year her focus was less on changing the flow of her room and more on the decor. She had had the little owl decorations for years, having moved them with her from Atlanta in an effort to save money. She wanted a completely different feel to her room. The rug she spotted while she and Rafael had been looking for something to store her albums and other keepsakes in had prompted her to spend the rest of the weekend searching for things she could exchange on her walls to match. The rug was varying shades of brown and teal squares and was large enough to sit her entire class. She had never had a rug, always opting to let the kids just sit on the floor without one, mainly because the cost of a rug was something she couldn’t justify spending. This one had been ridiculously priced at fifty bucks on clearance, but she assumed it was because no one in their right mind would buy it for their home. The design was kind of ugly, but the colors were muted and would tie in nicely with the things she had found at Michaels or ordered online to redecorate her room with.

Katherine had found a few different editable classroom decor off of teachers pay teachers and printed the color items out the night before and used the schools resources to print anything that was only black and white. Her plan was to cover the bulletin boards in burlap and trim them with teal and redo all the signage to have a chalkboard or wooden sign feel. All of this was laid out on one of the desk groupings. Light purple and green cardboard bins that were falling apart from years of use were replaced with metal pails of varying shapes and sizes, all ready for pencils, scissors, rulers... and other school supplies she tried to keep available for students whose families couldn’t afford them.

Once everything was finished printing, she took the stack of signage along with a few task card sets and a new classroom rules anchor chart she made down to the workroom to laminate them. No one was waiting on her so she set the laminator to its slowest setting and took her time feeding them through. This would ensure the lamination adhered properly and she wouldn’t have to waste time redoing anything. Once finished she rolled up the long length of laminated work and carried it back to her classroom so she could gather her things to meet Amanda for an early dinner. Katherine would be working in her classroom again the next day so the only thing she decided to drag back home with her was what she had laminated. She used binder clips to secure each end of the roll and tucked it under one shoulder while slinging her purse over the other.

 

“What the hell is that?” Amanda grumbled when Katherine set the roll of lamination next to her desk.

“Stuff I want to cut out tonight, I was hoping to leave it here while we ate.”

“Why can’t you just teach from a book?”

“Because I teach nine and ten year olds and they learn better when they are engaged.” Katherine chuckled.

“What is that?” Amanda asked her voice more serious this time and Katherine looked to see her eyes settled on the ring Rafael had given her.

“Oh, umm...”

“He asked you to marry him?” She yanked Katherine’s hand closer so she could look at the ring.

“Yes.” Katherine wasn’t quite sure why she felt so timid suddenly, she had been planning to tell Amanda at dinner.

“And you said yes?”

“Obviously.” Katherine chuckled, pulling her hand back.

“When were you going to tell me?”

“At dinner, he only asked a few days ago.”

“Isn’t it a little fast?”

“Says the woman who told me to invite her to the wedding two months in.” Katherine smirked.

“I was teasing you.” Amanda said, her tone going serious again.

“I’m happy, happier than I’ve ever been. I love him. I really don’t care if it’s too soon.” Katherine smiled, holding her hand a little higher to look at the ring again. Her mind not focused on the jewelry itself, but on the man who had picked it out.

“It’s really pretty.” Amanda smiled.

“What’s pretty?” Carisi asked as he, Liv, and Fin entered the bullpen.

Amanda didn’t actually respond just dragged Katherine closer to them by her left hand.

“He finally asked?” Liv grinned, leaning in for a better look at the ring.

“You knew?” Katherine asked.

“He nervously mentioned buying a ring when we were working late one night... that was a while ago though. It was never brought up again, but I was hoping he’d get up the nerve to ask you sooner or later.” Liv smiled.

“How’d he ask?” Carisi questioned.

“Oh... umm... nothing over the top or anything. Just kind of intimately while we were at home the other night.” It was close enough to the truth to make her blush, but not blush enough to raise suspicion that there was more to the story.

“Congratulations.” Fin smiled.

“Oh, you actually congratulate the groom and give best wishes to the bride and, Oh. My. God. I just channeled my mother... Thank you, thank you is what I meant to say.” Her mother had corrected so many people during her first engagement that it just kind of came out of her mouth without much thought and Katherine was now a bit embarrassed.

“You’re marrying Barba, best wishes seems fitting.” Fin chuckled.

“Have you told your mom?” Amanda laughed.

“No. I am not quite ready to discuss dates and themes and dresses yet.” Katherine huffed.

“I’m so happy for both of you.” Liv smiled, when Fin reminded her they still needed to finish up a few things. “I have never seen him this contented.” She added before she and Fin headed to her office, leaving Carisi alone with Amanda and Katherine.

“You two going to dinner?” Carisi asked.

“We are, you care to join?” Katherine asked, smiling when Amanda rolled her eyes.

“Yeah, I mean Liv and Fin have some paperwork left on that case from last week but I...”

“Jesus Carisi, you don’t need a reason. Just say yes.” Amanda grumbled as she grabbed her bag and headed toward the elevator.

Katherine smiled and shrugged at Carisi, both of them following not far behind.

 

“Do you want a big wedding again?” Amanda asked once their drink orders had been placed.

“No. I want something small and intimate. I don’t want it to cost a small fortune... hell I’d be fine with eloping. The look on my mothers face alone would be worth the fact that Rafael’s mom might never forgive.” Katherine laughed. She was joking though, she would never do that to Lucia.

“What does Barba want?” Carisi asked.

“We haven’t talked about it yet.” Katherine shrugged.

“I’m sure he’d be fine with whatever Katherine wants to do.” Amanda added.

“I guess... I mean most guys probably just go along with whatever, but there are some of us that actually think about that stuff.” Carisi said.

“You’ve planned your wedding then?” Amanda smirked.

“Not planned, no. I just know that I want to see her,” he glanced at Amanda and then quickly looked at Katherine, “whoever she ends up being... I want to see her walk down the aisle in a dress she’s super excited to wear.”

“Ugh... I don’t know if I want to wear a wedding dress again... it’s weird to think about doing this for a second time...” Katherine sighed.

“You don’t have to go traditional.” Amanda suggested.

“Yes, but I’ve done the whole traditional wedding thing... parts of that was nice. What if Raf wants that and I take it from him because he’s trying to be accommodating and just agrees to whatever I want?”

“Barba... accommodating?” Carisi questioned, furrowing his brow.

“He’s apparently different with her.” Amanda smirked.

“Amanda...” Katherine groaned at the lack of help she was getting.

“Just ask Barba what he wants.” Amanda stated.

“Yes... communication. I can do that.” Katherine nodded, somewhat laughing at herself.

“Oh and cake. I want to do the cake tasting thing.” Carisi interjected.

“Could you be anymore random?” Amanda chuckled.

Carisi smiled at her and took a sip of his drink. “You’re not drinking again.”

“So?” Amanda huffed as Katherine’s eyes widened almost in amusement.

“You just... you normally drink, that’s all.” He mumbled, glancing at her belly. The belly that she was using clothes in an attempt to hide the fact that she was clearly beginning to show.

“Don’t tell anyone,” Amanda sighed, “I don’t want to be restricted to desk duty yet.”

“Liv’s going to find out.” Carisi no longer seemed as light and carefree as before.

“I’ll tell her... just not yet.”

“Does Nick know?”

“It’s not Nicks.” Amanda shrugged.

Katherine watched as the two silently sat across from each other, Carisi fighting off asking who’s it was and Amanda stubbornly refusing to give anything else.

“You should be drinking water.” Carisi finally said.

“I’m tired of water... all I drink is water. Besides, the ginger ale helps settle my stomach with acidic foods.” Amanda grumbled.

“Please tell me you ordered something healthy?”

“Really Carisi?” Amanda huffed. “And what are you smiling at?” She grumbled at Katherine.

“Nothing.” Katherine grinned as she shook her head, not bothering to hide her amusement in the conversation taking place between her dinner companions.

 


	30. Chapter 30

 

Rafael watched Katherine as she spread jelly on her toast, furrowing his brow slightly when she moved closer to the sink and flicked a bit into it. “Something wrong with that particular speck of jelly?”

“I don’t like the chunky bits.”

“You mean the fruit?” He chuckled.

“Yes.” She smirked, finishing up spreading the jelly on her toast and moving to rinse out the sink.

“You know you can buy jelly without bits of fruit in it.”

“I like this jelly.” Katherine shrugged, placing both it and the butter back in the fridge.

“Have you told your mother you’re getting married yet?”

“No.”

“You know the longer you wait the worse you’re going to make it for yourself.” Rafael grabbed her cup when he went to refill his own with coffee.

“We could just secretly get married and never tell her.”

“Or you could, I don’t know... actually be an adult.” Rafael chuckled.

“Do you know how excited she is going to be?”

“That’s why you should call her.” He smiled, kissing her forehead when he sat back down.

“Fine, I’ll call.” Katherine muttered. “What kind of wedding do you want?”

“I’m not picky.” He shrugged, the coffee cup lifted to his lips in preparation to drink.

“I need help in planning this. Amanda... well it’s really not her thing and after last time my mom will have absolutely no say in anything.”

“I can help, I’ve just never really thought about it so I don’t really know where to begin.”

“Let’s start with general size, do you want a big or small wedding?” Katherine asked.

“Smaller sounds better.”

“I agree,” she smiled relaxing a bit, “Indoor or outdoor?”

“I guess it would depend on the weather... indoor seems safer.”

“Maybe rent a loft type venue, something with indoor and outdoor areas...” Katherine thought out loud.

“I’m sure Brooklyn has something.” Rafael smiled.

“Who all do you want to be there?”

“My mom and abeulita... Liv and we can invite the rest of SVU... McCoy, Carmen... there maybe a few other people from work, but I’m not looking to drag out everyone from my past.” She had missed the whole Alex and Yelina debacle and he had no intention of revisiting it.

“That’s what, eight so far?”

“I think. Who would you want there?”

“My parents, Amanda who’s been included already, and maybe Karla and a couple other people from my old school if they can travel here.”

“That brings it up to eleven plus a couple maybes then.”

“Thirteen if you include us.” Katherine smiled.

“We would be a rather important element.” He smirked.

“What about the dress?”

“Isn’t that more your thing?”

“Sonny just mentioned that he’s always envisioned his future wife walking down an aisle in a wedding dress...”

“Why would you listen to Carisi?” Rafael chuckled.

“Rafael...”

“What do you want to wear?”

“I really don’t want to wear a traditional wedding dress.”

“As long as you’re the one standing next to me you can wear whatever you want.”

“You’re sure?”

“Positive.” He smiled resting his hand on hers.

“Ok, I’ll research some possible venues for our small guest list, food and drink options, and possible decor. I don’t really want to spend a small fortune. When do you want to get married?”

“Tomorrow... a year from now... I’m open.” He smirked.

“That’s helpful.” She chuckled.

“We don’t have to decide everything right now.”

“I know, but if I call my mom these are the kinds of questions she will ask.” Katherine sighed.

“Just tell her we’re still figuring out what we want. She’s nine hundred miles away, what is she going to do hop on a plane and come help you plan?”

“I wouldn’t put it passed her.” She grumbled.

“Just call her.” Rafael smirked, taking her empty plate to the sink to prevent her from using cleaning as an excuse to procrastinate.

Katherine tried to grab the spray so she could clean the counter but Rafael took it from her and shook his head, motioning to her phone instead.

“Fine.” Katherine huffed and picked up her phone, dialing the number for her mother. “It’s ringing.” She grumbled when he smiled at her while washing their breakfast plates.

“Hey mom.” Katherine half sighed into the phone. “No, no, I’m fine. Everything’s great actually.” Rafael watched as she paced silently on the living room side of the kitchen island, listening to whatever her mom was going on about. “You don’t say? A Rolex.” Katherine turned to him and rolled her eyes while pointing to the phone. “Well maybe Sarah Beth can call Carianne and she can get in touch with her watch guy for you.” Her voice was laden with sarcasm. “Yes mom… I’m aware that was rude.”

Rafael rolled his eyes and dried his hands, setting the towel on the counter as he walked toward her and lifted her left hand in front of her face. “Don’t forget to spray the counter.” Katherine smirked, tugging her hand back.

“Yes mom, Rafael is with me. We live together now, remember?” Katherine rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to her mother. “I’m glad you really like him, I do too. In fact...” Rafael chuckled when Katherine furrowed her brow and pointed at the phone in annoyance as her mother interrupted her. “That’s fantastic for Emily...”

“Who’s Emily?” Rafael whispered and Katherine replied by widening her eyes and shrugging.

“Hey mom...” Katherine sighed when she was cut off again and pulled the phone from her ear. She switched over to speaker phone and her mothers voice filled the room as she opened up the camera, took a picture of her engagement ring, and sent it in a text to her mother.

“Oh... I have a text.” Natalie stated.

“Go ahead and check it.” Katherine chuckled and waited patiently as her mother pulled up the image.

“It’s from you... what is that?”

“It’s a ring mom.” Katherine said dryly.

“I know it’s a ring,” Natalie huffed, “you’re engaged?”

“Yes.” Katherine switched off speaker and brought the phone to her ear, immediately regretting it as she pulled the phone from her ear again when her mothers voice became so loud and high pitched Rafael could hear it from a few feet away.

“Thank you.” Rafael smiled, kissing the top of her head as he passed her on his way to finished cleaning the kitchen.

“Yeah, yeah... you owe me when she starts talking china patterns.” Katherine grumbled quietly as she pulled the phone back to her ear.

“Anything you want.” He smirked while wiping down the counter.

 

Katherine was a bit surprised when Carisi answered the door at Amanda’s apartment.

“Hey Kate.”

“Sonny.” She smiled, eyeing him as she joined Amanda in the kitchen.

Amanda rolled her eyes and turned her attention to the books lining her dining room table, shifting them into slightly straighter stacks.

“Well I’ll let you two have your girl time.” Carisi smiled, nodding as he let himself out.

Katherine didn’t say anything just grinned as she moved closer to Amanda.

“Don’t even go there.” Amanda grumbled.

“What? I come over in the middle of the afternoon on a Saturday and the guy who clearly likes you is answering the door to your apartment...” She was still grinning, but Amanda was far from amused.

“He just brought me some books that his sisters said where actually helpful.”

Katherine glanced at the baby books, shifting them so she could read the different titles. “That’s sweet.”

“I hear you told your mom you got engaged.”

Katherine’s eyes widened. “How? I called her three hours ago.”

“The Atlanta grapevine of desperate housewives.” Amanda smirked.

“Did she tell your mom or did someone else?”

“Carianne sent the picture to my mom and then my mom sent it to me with a not so subtle dig at my own marriage prospects.”

“Picture?” Amanda help up her phone so Katherine could see that the picture she had taken of her ring and texted her mother had made it to Amanda’s phone. “Great, so I can assume Chelsea knows...”

“And by extension Scott.” Amanda added.

“Just once, I’d like to know what it’s like to have a mother who doesn’t feel the need to brag to all of her friends about things that don’t even involve her.”

“What does it matter if he knows?”

“It doesn’t... I just don’t like him knowing anything about my life now.” Katherine shrugged.

“Did he and Chelsea ever get married?”

“I have no idea.” Katherine had never asked because she truthfully hadn’t cared.

“You’re mom never mentioned anything?”

“I don’t talk about Scott with my mom.”

“Still she’s friends with Carianne, if they had she’d probably have mentioned it.”

“Probably.”

“You don’t want to talk about this?” Amanda smirked.

“Scott? Why wouldn’t I want to talk about Scott?” Katherine replied sarcastically.

“Fine, you pick the topic.”

“Have you found out if you’re having a girl or a boy?”

“I'm having a girl.”

“Have you picked a name?” Katherine grinned.

“I’m leaning toward Jesse but I haven’t decided for sure yet.”

“Do you want to go baby shopping before I have to go back to work?”

“I do.” Amanda smiled.

“You’re getting excited then?” Katherine chuckled.

“Excited... nervous... it’s hard to tell most days. I never thought I’d be doing this, much less doing it alone.”

“You’re going to have lots of help.”

“I swear if you mention Carisi again...”

Katherine laughed and dodged the pen Amanda chunked at her. “I meant me, but you bringing him up makes me think he’ll be around as well.”

“I hate you.”

“No you don’t.” Katherine smiled.

 

It was later that month and Rafael was working late in his office. Katherine had offered to bring him dinner, but he kept thinking he’d be able to leave soon. He was officially hungry and to the point of not being able to do much more when he decided to call it a night and head home. He texted Katherine that he was leaving after locking his office door. He wasn’t paying attention to his surroundings as he exited the building and didn’t notice that he was being approached until he heard a voice speaking to him.

“She’s just using you.”

Rafael turned to find Katherine’s ex-husband keeping pace with him. “Scott right?”

“Kate likes men with money, men who can take care of her.”

“I take it you found out we’re engaged.” Rafael paused and turned to face the man who seemed determined to keep up with him.

“She’s fun in the beginning, she seems perfect... she’ll change once you're married.” Scott was trying his best to appear only as though he were warning Rafael not to make the same mistake he had.

“Perfect?” Rafael chuckled. Katherine was far from perfect, he thought she was perfect for him, but he was aware she had flaws. “Who said anything about her being perfect?”

This seemed to throw Scott off his original plan of trying to seem friendly. “After you're married she’ll start hinting at kids and wanting to be a stay at home mom… sponging off you.”

“I make enough.” Rafael shrugged, not that he believed a word of what Scott had said. He may not have known Katherine long, but it was long enough to know she’d have to be dragged out of her classroom kicking and screaming before she’d leave her career as a teacher.

“Kate’s manipulative. She’ll trap you and then let herself go. You’re sex life will be nonexistent...”

“I highly doubt that.” Rafael interrupted while smirking.

Scott clenched his jaw taking a few breaths to calm himself. “You think I wanted to cheat on her... Two years without even being touched by your wife and you get a little desperate.”

“What exactly did you do for her?” Rafael countered, officially engaging in this conversation.

“What?”

“Did you make sure her needs were met?”

“You’re really questioning my abilities in the bedroom?”

“I am.” Rafael lifted his brows and standing a little taller.

“Whatever she’s told you is a lie. She’s a vindictive little bitch who will say whatever she needs to get what she wants.” Scott hissed.

“Ok.” Rafael pushed his bottom lip up and shrugged, while starting for the steps again.

Scott grabbed his arm, turning him to face him again. “I’m trying to help you not make the same mistake I did.”

“No, you’re trying to prevent Katherine from being happy.” Rafael scoffed. “It’s a pathetically weak man who would travel all the way to New York just to convince his ex-wife’s fiancé not to marry her. It’s speaks more to your character than hers don’t you think?”

“You think I’m weak?” Scott seethed.

He reached to grip the lapels of Rafael’s suit jacket, pulling them so the were face to face. Rafael’s eyes bounce back and forth while Scott’s nostrils flared and his brow narrowed in anger.

“Go ahead,” Rafael was calm, his gaze never backing down from Scott’s, “nothing would make me happier than having you thrown in jail for assaulting a district attorney.”

“Assistant.” Scott scoffed.

“You act as though the qualifier lessens the prison sentence.”

They were still in the midst of their staring contest when Rafael’s driver stepped out of the car. “Is everything alright, Mr. Barba?”

“Is it?” Rafael huffed, never taking his eyes from Scott.

Scott glance at Rafael’s driver and let go of his suit jacket, backing away with his hands slightly lifted. “You know what... do what you want, just don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

Rafael straightened his collar and continued down the steps to the car waiting for him.

“Thank you, Carl.” He nodded as Carl held the door for him.

“No problem, Mr. Barba.”

Carl was and intimidating man, towering over most everyone at six-six and muscular build. He wasn’t always the driver that picked him up, but Rafael was thankful that tonight he had been. The other driver he regularly received, Ronnie, a Danny DeVito looking guy who couldn’t have stood much taller that the actor, might not have had the same impact.

 

“You didn’t eat did you?” Katherine scolded when Rafael sank into the couch next to her.

“I truthfully thought I’d leave before I did.” He sighed.

“I’ll warm you up my leftovers.”

Katherine gave him a kiss as she stood and made her way to the kitchen. Rafael watched her pull a styrofoam container from the fridge and move its contents to a plate.

“What am I eating?” He smirked, moving himself to sit at the kitchen island.

“My lunch for tomorrow,” Katherine smiled. “Half a chicken breast, roasted potatoes, and entirely too much fettuccine alfredo which is the reason I had leftovers to begin with. It’s really good though.”

“Who’d you eat with?” He leaned forward on the counter and rubbed his eyes.

“Karla. We were both working in our classrooms and decided to grab dinner afterward. We ended up talking about you the whole time after she noticed my ring.” Katherine pulled the plate from the microwave and slid it across the counter so that it sat in front of him. She then grabbed a fork and handed it to him as she sat on the stool next to him. “How was your day?”

“It was work, not terribly different from any other day... at least not until I left.”

“What happened when you left?” Katherine asked, smiling at him as she stole a potato.

“Your ex-husband accosted me.”

Katherine’s smiled quickly faded. “Why?”

“He wanted to warn me against marrying you, like I would believe anything he had to say.” Rafael huffed.

“What did he say?”

“It’s not important.”

“I’d like to know.” Katherine sighed.

“He tried to tell me you were manipulating me into marrying you, and that once we were married you’d want to quit work and stay at home all day.” Rafael chuckled.

“Jeez... it’s like he didn’t know me at all.”

“Like you’d ever leave the classroom to stay home with all the kids you’re going to talk me into having.”

“He said that?” This time Katherine laughed. “That I’d start talking about wanting kids?”

“Yes, why is that funny?”

“It’s not, I mean with you it wouldn’t be funny. I’d be open to a dialogue on children at some point if you wanted, but with him I hid my birth control. I was completely convinced that if he knew I was actively preventing us from having children that he’d turn it into a thing.”

“You didn’t talk about kids at all?” Rafael pried.

“We did, while we were dating. When we got married, we had wanted to just be the two of us for a while, then... I couldn’t bring a baby into that... part of me thinks I was afraid of being trapped... so I never brought it up.” Katherine took a few breaths. “I feel bad for Chelsea.”

Rafael tucked her under his arm. “Did he ever hurt you, physically?”

“What made you ask that?”

“He seemed capable.” Rafael shrugged.

“There were a few times I thought he might, but he always stormed out instead. The night before I left... we got into an argument over cleaning the kitchen. I had made the mistake of sitting in my chair to check e-mails between eating and cleaning.” Katherine rolled her eyes. “After I finished the dishes and wiped the counter, Scott came to inspect.”

“Inspect?” Rafael raised one brow.

“That’s what I lived with. It wouldn’t matter how well I had cleaned, he’d find something or at least act like he did. This particular night I tired to ignore it and just let him clean the kitchen counter again without comment. I kept noticing him glaring at me as he wiped and I could feel myself shrinking in my chair. I knew my ignoring him was only making him angrier. Finally he snapped and unloaded every negative thing he could think to say about me so I called him an ass. I told him he was an emotionally abusive son of a bitch who cared about no one but himself. That’s when he threw a plate from the dishwasher. It hit the wall not far from me and I ran from the room, hiding in the office. I could still hear plates shattering and then it was silent. It didn’t take him long to find me, but he had calmed a bit. As usual, he was annoyed that I was crying and I asked to be left alone, so he left... probably to go see Chelsea. After I composed myself, I cleaned up the broken plates and went to bed. The next morning something had changed, my home no longer felt like home... I didn’t feel safe anymore. I did what I probably should have done after the first time he threw a chair or the time I’m pretty sure he almost hit me... I packed up my crap and left.”

“Now I kind of wish he had hit me...” Rafael grumbled.

“You thought he might hit you?”

“He got in my face, then Carl said something and he backed off.” Rafael shrugged.

“Why would you have wanted him to hit you?”

“I’d have had his ass arrested... that and it would have been fun to watch Carl pull him off me and detain him until the police could get there.” Rafael chuckled a bit at the mental picture he had of Scott’s face smushed against the concrete.

“I’d rather him just go back to Atlanta and leave us alone.” Katherine was smiling, but it was at how excited Rafael seemed at the prospect of seeing Scott taken down a peg.

“And that’s what makes you a better person than me.” He smirked, tugging her closer and kissing her forehead.


	31. Chapter 31

 

Katherine took her time with the start of her day. Rafael had left for work at least an hour before she dragged herself out of bed. They had lived together for close to two months and his place was beginning to feel like hers. Initially she had felt a little like she was still sleeping over… a visiting girlfriend with a key… now she moved about the home much like she did in the tiny apartment she had spent the last two years in.

It had helped that some of her things were placed about his place… their place. When she had suggested it, it was mainly because she had wanted to keep a bit of the life she had built for herself. The small reminders of her old apartment turned out to be so much more important. They gave her a sense of belonging, that it was her home too.

Katherine sat at her small sage table, the one they had place to overlook Central Park from just off the main living room space. Her coffee and a notepad were the only things on the table, her fingers unconsciously fiddling with her pen as she read a couple chapters the book her principal had assigned as summer reading. Rafael would more than likely be late at work again so she wasn’t in a rush to work on her classroom.

 

“You’re later than normal.” Debbie smiled when Katherine stopped in the office to say hello.

“I had a nice lazy morning.” Katherine said returning the smile. “Is anyone else up there?”

“No. The first grade team is working down the hall but your floor is empty. I turned the lights on in the hall closest to your room earlier so it wouldn’t be dark when you got up there.”

“I appreciate that, it’s so creepy when you have to search for the switch in the dark.”

She was usually the first one on her floor in the morning, even during the school year and had spent countless mornings circling the level turning on all the lights. During the summer she typically only turned on the ones on the hall her classroom was down.

“It’s no problem.” Debbie gave her a goofy grin causing Katherine to furrow her brow.

“What’s with the grin?”

“Oh, nothing. I just glance at your ring again. I’m so excited for you. News like that brings family closer.” Debbie smiled again.

“I guess.” Katherine awkwardly chuckled at the peculiar behavior of the school secretary.

She made her way upstairs, unlocked her classroom and flipped on the light in almost one motion. Her bag was dropped on one of the desk groupings that she had cleared off the day before. The room was coming along nicely. She had everything organized and was down to putting the final touches on her walls giving her time to create decorations to match her new theme, decorations that weren’t necessary but added to the feel of the room.

“Jesus!” She gasped when Scott spun in her desk chair so she could see him. “How’d you get in here?”

“I told the sweet lady in the front office I was your brother and wanted to surprise you. She was all too happy to help me.” Scott smiled.

“Why are you here?”

“I wanted to talk.” He shrugged.

“Like you talked to Raf last night?” Katherine muttered.

Her eyes went to the door and Scott stood moving into the empty space between her and the exit.

“Do you know how infuriating it is to see someone else get to benefit from my hard work?”

Katherine rolled her eyes and reached into her bag as though she were looking for something. “What hard work?” Her fingers quickly found her phone and she quietly pressed the contact for Rafael, leaving the phone in her purse as it rang, hoping that he’d be able to answer. She then pulled out a few of the things she had bought for her classroom, setting them out on the desks.

“You were a such a slob when we met… and that slum you lived it with Amanda…”

“It wasn’t a slum, it was dated. The landlord actually kept the place up pretty nicely considering.”

“You remember how lazy you were? How you would leave dishes piled up in the sink? The bed unmade? All your school crap piled up around the living room? I turned you into a highly organized and efficient person.” It was like before, Scott ignored her words and fixated on the things he wanted.

“Yes, by making me feel like inept waste of space. I did the best I could to be good enough for you, but nothing ever was.”

“That was the best you could do?”

Katherine focused on her breathing and ignored him. His comment was meant to be hurtful and she was determined not to let his words effect her anymore.

“Do you really think your fiancé would want anything to do with you if you were still that mess of a person that I started dating?”

“I have no idea, nor do I care. I’m not her anymore.” Katherine grumbled.

“What do you think will happen when…”

“How’d you find out what school I worked at?” Katherine had purposely not advertised on social media where she worked. It was where she spent most of her day and hadn’t wanted that information readily available. Granted her ex husband showing up had never crossed her mind, it was more a paranoia of what personal information she put online.

“Sam.”

“Sam Reynolds? Why doesn’t that surprise me.” Katherine scoffed. “Doesn’t he have better things to do than abuse his power by looking up information on your ex wife?"

“He just looked up where you worked, I highly doubt that constitutes an abuse of power.”

“You know what? It doesn’t matter, but you need to leave.” Katherine was scolding herself for not asking him to leave earlier.

“I’m not leaving. I came to talk.”

“No you came to insult me, to make me feel like I used to when we were married… but we’re not married anymore. I don’t have to talk to you and I don’t want to. You need to leave.” She didn’t move from where she stood. Scott was still blocking her exit but she hoped he’d leave if she asked.

“You’re such a selfish bitch.” Scott snapped.

“Me?”

“Yes you! I paid off your student loans, let you live with me…”

“You let me live with you?” Technically he had, but it was the way he said it… like she hadn’t offered to help with bills or done all the grocery shopping.

“I paid for everything just like your new guy.”

Katherine shook her head and chuckled. “Rafael doesn’t pay for everything and I offered to help you with bills, you said it was emasculating or some nonsense.”

“I didn’t ask that much of you, just that our home was clean and orderly.”

“I want you to leave.” Katherine repeated more firmly this time as she glanced in her bag and noticed that the phone was still lit up. “You used to be so good at that.”

Scotts jaw tightened and he moved closer. “You think Chelsea was the only one?” His brows were tense as he stood across the desk from her. “You remember when I used to travel with work all the time? I pretty much always found some piece of ass on the road.”

“Lucky them.” Katherine said sarcastically, flinching when Scott slammed his hands down on the desk as he leaned in bringing them face to face. “You should go back to Atlanta.” Katherine stated, not backing down from his stare.

“You should really do as she says.” Amanda voiced pulled both of their attention to her classroom door.

“Oh yeah, Mandy… are you going to make me?” Scott laughed.

“Let me put it this way, you either leave and catch the next flight home or I arrest you for stalking.”

“Stalking? I’m just having a conversation with my ex wife. I didn’t stalk anyone.”

“You used your cop buddy to find out where I worked, manipulated the secretary to let you in my room, all after accosting my fiancé the night before…”

“That sounds like stalking to me.” Amanda added.

“Yeah, so what, I’ll get a slap on the wrist and a restraining order.” Scott scoffed.

“Possibly, but keep in mind this isn’t Atlanta and Reynolds isn’t here to bail you out.” Amanda huffed.

“Sam says hi by the way.” Scott smirked.

Amanda rolled her eyes. “Are you leaving or am I going to have to arrest you?”

“I’m going.” Scott smiled while backing away from Katherine. “It’s a shame we never got a chance to hook up.” He smirked as he passed Amanda.

“From what I hear I’m not missing much.”

“You fucking bitch.” Scott hissed. He turned, and started back in the direction of Katherine, but Amanda tripped him before he could get more than a few steps and he landed against his stomach on the floor.

“I guess I’m arresting you then.” Amanda shrugged while pulling his arms behind his back to cuff him. “You really do have a temper.”

“You did that on purpose.”

“Maybe, but your reaction tells me you know it’s the truth.” Amanda smirked before reading him his rights.

Katherine pulled her phone from her bag and since the call was still going she pulled it to her ear. “Raf?”

“Are you ok?” Rafael’s voice sounded concerned. The worry of a man listening to a situation unfold that he couldn’t do anything about.

“I am. Why’d you send Amanda?”

“I didn’t actually send her, I was at the precinct when you called. I only answered to tell you I’d have to call you back, but when I heard Scotts voice I put it on speaker. Rollins headed out the door as soon as she heard him. Why wouldn’t I send Amanda?”

Katherine froze and looked up to see Amanda glaring at her. In all that had happened she hadn’t thought about the fact that at work only Carisi knew Amanda was pregnant. “I’ll tell you later.”

“Uh, no you won’t.” Amanda scolded from across the room.

“Yes I will.” Katherine sighed.

“You’ll tell me what?” Rafael asked.

“I’ll tell you later, I promise.”

“He better not say anything.” Amanda huffed.

Scott looked between the two women and then Amanda’s belly and laughed. “Someone knocked you up?”

Amanda tightened the cuffs and he winced while continuing to chuckle.

“Thanks.” Amanda huffed again at Katherine.

“How much longer did you seriously think you were going to be able to hide it anyway?” Katherine asked.

“Maybe another month.” Amanda shrugged.

Katherine turned her attention back to her phone and Rafael. “Are you still at the precinct?”

“I am.”

“I’ll ride there with Amanda… I want to see you even if it’s only for a moment.”

“Awe,” Scott swooned sarcastically, “isn’t that sweet…”

“Shut up.” Amanda muttered, walking him toward the door as Katherine grabbed her bag.

 

Amanda guided them into the bullpen, pushing Scott a little more than was probably needed. Rafael got up from the chair he was working in and made his way to Katherine.

“You’re really ok?”

“I am.” Katherine nodded, letting him pull her into his arms.

“What are we doing with him?” Liv asked, gesturing to Scott.

“I arrested him for stalking, but it’s up to Kate if she wants a restraining order put in place.” Amanda shrugged.

“Oh, come on Mandy…” Scott huffed.

“It’s Amanda.” She snapped, tightening his cuffs again.

“Ok,” Liv exhaled, “Carisi, take Mr….”

“Howell.” Katherine stated.

“Mr. Howell to holding while we figure out which ADA to call for charges since our normal one has a conflict of interest.” Liv continued, turning to give Rafael a somewhat amused smile.

Carisi took Scott back and everyone else returned to their seats around the table, everyone except Rafael anyway. He remained standing with Katherine.

“I’m sorry to disrupt your trial prep or whatever.” Katherine sighed.

“You didn’t, he did.” Rafael replied.

“It’s honestly a good thing you did, you don’t know how many stalker ex husbands I’ve seen come back to harm their former spouse in some way,” Liv interjected. “At least now it’ll be documented and if he bothers you again, he’ll be looking at jail time.”

“That’s unsettling…” Katherine muttered.

“Scotts an ass,” Amanda huffed, “he’s just trying to get a reaction out of you.”

“I get filing a restraining order, but what happens with the arrest?” Katherine asked.

“He’ll have to get a lawyer, since he can afford one, they’ll most likely get the charges knocked down to a fine.” Rafael grumbled this slightly because he’d fight for more, because it was Katherine… not so much for anyone else, which was why he wouldn’t be filing charges. “There’s a slim change the judge would tack on a probationary period, but that’s doubtful.”

“Ok.” Katherine nodded. Mostly she just wanted Scott gone. To be back in Atlanta allowing her to live her life normally and stress free again. “Do I need to be here for this or can I go back and work in my classroom.” The idea of sitting idle suddenly made her anxious.”

“I can call you when the ADA is ready for you. They’ll be the one to file the order of protection.” Rafael offered.

“Give me twenty minutes notice so I have time to walk back.” Katherine smiled, feeling a bit relieved.

Rafael looked around and then dragged her into the hall outside the bullpen. “Why didn’t you want Rollins to help you?”

“I’ll tell you later.”

“Katherine…”

Katherine looked around to make sure they were completely alone. “If I tell you, I’m telling you something about my friend as your girlfriend… as your fiancé… and that means you can’t go in there and mention something to Liv.”

Rafael furrowed his brow.

“It’s not my information to share with her coworkers.” Katherine sighed.

“Ok, seriously… what is it?”

“Promise me you won’t say anything to Liv first.”

“I can’t make that promise until I know what it is… I’m sorry.” Rafael sighed.

Katherine chuckled. “It’s nothing that will effect your cases.”

“Just tell me.”

“She’s pregnant.”

“Oh.” Rafael’s eyebrows lifted a little higher than Katherine had expected. “Is it Nicks?”

“No.” Katherine chuckled again, but mostly at the fact that his brow had furrowed rather quickly. “I’ll tell you tonight.”

“I suppose I can wait.” He smirked, pulling her closer so he could kiss her.

“You won’t tell Liv?”

“It’s not my place to tell her, besides she’ll fine out soon enough.”

“Sooner than you might think.” Katherine chuckled and Rafael gave her another curious look. “Call me when I need to come back.” She smiled, pushing up to kiss him again before pressing the button for the elevator.

 

The order of protection had been filed. At Reynolds suggestion, Scott’s had hirer Buchanan and managed to walk out of the precinct later that evening with a minimal fine and the indiscretion noted so heavier charges could be filed at a later time if he failed to learn from this experience and bothered Katherine or Rafael again.

Katherine had been laying in bed for a while when Rafael finally crawled in behind her. She had tried to sleep but she hadn’t been able to without him there.

“You should be asleep.” He smiled when he noticed her eyes were open, cuddling himself closer to her.

“I was having trouble sleeping, I think I wanted to know you made it home.”

“I’m home.” He smiled.

“Do you think Scott will bother us again?” She sighed.

“I don’t know, you know him better than me.”

“I don’t think he’s stupid enough to risk jail time, but I didn’t think he’d do this either…”

“I think he just wanted to feel like he had some control over you again.” Rafael was trying to reassure her, but it almost made her worry more.

“When will he stop trying to claim some control over me?”

“Hey, it’s over now,” Rafael said, turning her to face him.

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.” He pushed up to kiss her forehead.

“I should probably see if my parents will come here for Christmas this year…” The country club seemed too complicated since all of Scott’s family would be there.

“I thought you said your mom would love that.” Rafael smirked.

“She will.” Katherine grinned.

“So make the arrangements. They can even stay in the guest room if you want.”

“Hmmm… I may need to think on that a bit before I offer. My mom will be all too happy to stay here, but I’m not sure I’m ready for that much of her presence.”

Rafael chuckled as he pushed her hair behind her ear. “Who’s the father of Rollins’ baby?”

“That Declan Murphy guy.”

“Really?”

“Really. They got snowed in together during that blizzard in February. You can’t tell anyone that even after they find out she’s pregnant.”

“Does he know?” Rafael asked.

“Not that I know of, but only because she doesn’t know how to reach him or something. She promised she’d tell him if she had contact again.”

“How long have you known?”

“Since the beginning of May, maybe April… I’m not sure. Sonny knows too.”

“And you three have been keeping your little secret?” He laughed.

“I’m pretty sure Sonny assumes you know, and it’s not our secrets… it’s Amanda’s.”

“I can concede to that.”

“What do you think of a winter wedding?” It wasn’t even close to the topic, but Katherine had been rolling the idea around since mentioning her parents could come to New York for Christmas a few minutes before.

“Does that mean we would get married around Christmas?”

“Maybe the week before or after, not Christmas themed. I just like the idea of deep blues and reds, which is silly since I’m not even thinking of decorating that much, it’s just…”

“It’s just what?”

“I had wanted a winter theme the first time, but Scott said getting married that close to Christmas was stupid and then my mom backed him up.” Katherine sighed.

“When did you get married then?”

“In June, while sweating outside in the Georgia heat. Everything was pink and light green and since my parents paid for most of it I didn’t argue.”

“You pick the day and even if it’s New Years Eve in the middle of Time Square I’ll be there.” Rafael smirked.

“That sounds awful… the Times Square bit, New Years Eve might not be so bad. We could just do it here and have a small party afterward… keep it low key, Liv and Amanda could bring their kids…” She was brainstorming out loud, but liking the idea of it more as she’s spoke.

“You really want to consummate our marriage with your parents just down the hall.” Rafael had already assumed, despite her previous statement, that her parents would stay with them.

“Don’t you see? It’s perfect. We get a hotel and then when we are ready we can just leave, and my parents will be left to deal with the party which is something my mother lives for. We’ll return home the next day to bagged and stored leftovers and the place being cleaned.”

“Does that mean you want to get married this year?”

“At the very end of it.” Katherine smirked.

“I guess we’ve set a date then.” Rafael smiled, tugging her closer.


	32. Chapter 32

 

It was the first day back and Katherine had arrived a bit earlier that she had intended… like before anyone else had arrived early. She knew the code to the alarm so she wasn’t concerned about getting into the building. This was a problem she seemed to have on the first day of school… she’d wake up excited and always ended up arriving early, just usually not this early. It would take her a bit to figure out what time to leave Rafael’s place while dealing with traffic as opposed to walking from her old apartment. She settled into her classroom, making sure everything was set up for the day. It would be the last time her room looked this clean and organized until the first day of school next year so she took it in while she could.

“Ms. Morgan?” MJ’s voice came from her door and she smiled.

“Hey MJ, how was your summer?”

MJ returned the smile and entered the room. “It was good. I got to do a lot of touristy things for the first time.”

“Did you and your mom do them together?”

“When she could, but I’m old enough now that no one seemed to question if I was by myself so I went alone when she was working.”

“Is she still working the same job?” Katherine asked while straightening a few things on her desk.

MJ nodded her reply. “Is it ok if I read in here again in the mornings?”

“You still want to get out of the house early?”

“I wake up earlier than my mom and she doesn’t like it if I make too much noise and wake her.” MJ shrugged.

“You’re always welcome in my room.”

It worried her that MJ still didn’t feel comfortable to spend her mornings at home, but she also felt it could be a holdover from before. Either way, she decided to not worry too much about it at the moment. It was only the first day back and MJ seemed to be in good spirits about how the summer had gone.

MJ settled in on the pile of pillows just like she had done the previous year, pulling out a book from her backpack.

“Foxfire?” Katherine frowned as she noticed the book MJ had opened.

“Did you not like it?”

“No… I did…” She remembered loving the book when she read it.

“Then why did you frown?”

Katherine chuckled to herself. “I was just concerned about some of the subject matter in the book, but if I’m being honest with myself I wasn’t much older than you when I read it.”

“How old?” MJ smiled.

“Thirteen I think… It’s been a while.”

“Don’t worry Ms. Morgan,” MJ smiled, “I can separate reality from fiction.”

Katherine was sure that she could, but she still worried about about some of the sexual situations some of the girls in the book were put in, especially with MJ’s mothers history.

“Hey MJ.”

“Yeah?”

“Do me a small favor this year…”

“What favor?” MJ’s side eyed her, curious as to where she was going with this.

“Treat Mrs. Rydel like you do me.”

“You mean behave myself.” MJ smiled.

“Yes.” Katherine smirked.

“I’ll see what I can do.”

 

When the bell rang Katherine moved to the door so she could great her new kids, giving MJ a hug as she left to head for the fifth grade hall. One by one the students piled in, finding the desk with their name tag on it. The group was quieter than last years, but she knew that was deceiving. Once the first day jitters worked off, the class would be just a lively as any.

They played games to help her put names with faces and worked on routines so they would know her expectations in the classroom, not to mention a few reminders of hallway and other general school expectations. Expectations. Something every kid, no matter how well behaved, seemed to forget over the summer.

The group seemed needier as well, but she thought that every year. It was amazing how much children changed and matured during their fourth grade year. Right now she still considered them third graders, she would even tell them they were behaving as third graders when they regressed from the progress they’d made after long breaks, the worst of which being the winter break.

 

Katherine settled in on the couch, cuddling under Rafael’s arm after staying entirely too late at school.

“How was your first day back with kids?”

“Every year I forget how much work goes into getting my classroom running they way I want it to.” She sighed.

“That doesn’t exactly tell me how your day went.” He chuckled while gently squeezing her closer.

“It was good, my kids seem sweet. They’re still on the quiet side though.”

“Are you hungry?”

“Depends… do I have to move to eat?”

“Just to the kitchen island.” He smiled, dragging her behind him as he stood to fix her dinner.

This was completely different than when she had lived with Scott. The man didn’t even have a pot to warm soup in when she moved in with him. They had gone to a kitchen store to buy things for her to cook with after she had settled all her belongings into his home. So the idea of him fixing her anything to eat, even a sandwich, after a long day of work had never even crossed her mind. It didn’t help that he seemed to think she was overreacting, that there wasn’t anyway she could be as tired as she made herself out to be. As the years progress Scott had become annoyed that she hadn’t left work earlier and had only bothered to pick up something rather than actually cook dinner for them.

“This is nice.” Katherine smiled as she watch Rafael move about the kitchen putting together a light salad for her with the leftover chicken he had made for his own dinner.

“What is?”

“Just the fact that you can cook.” Katherine smirked.

“It’s a salad…” He chuckled, sliding it across the counter to her.

“I know.”

“Has anyone ever cooked for you?”

“You mean a boyfriend?”

“Yes.” Rafael pulled out a bottle of wine and held it up.

Katherine waved off the wine so he grabbed a water for her instead. “I think you’re the first person I’ve dated that could actually cook.”

“What about something that’s not really cooking… like warming up soup in the microwave or putting a sandwich together?” He took the seat next to her and slid the water over.

Katherine thought for a moment, maybe too long of a moment, because eventually Rafael spoke again. “Who took care of you when you were sick?”

“I did.” Katherine shrugged.

“You cooked dinner even when you were sick?”

“No, there’s no way Scott would have eaten something that I prepared when I might have been contagious… I’d pick up something to go.”

Rafael let out an angry puff of air. “He should have done that.”

“Maybe but what does it matter now?”

“It doesn’t… I just… I’ve been thinking about some of the things I overheard him say to you when he was in your classroom.” Katherine wasn’t sure where Rafael was going with this and pushed a tomato around on her plate. “Perhaps it more something you said…” Katherine closed her eyes and took a breath. She was exhausted. Too tired to analyze herself or her marriage to Scott. “You said you weren’t her anymore… like there was an old version of yourself that he took from you. If you need me to pick up some slack so you can find her again, I can.”

“Pick up what slack?” Katherine chuckled, “you already carry more weight in our relationship than I had ever dreamt anyone would.”

“I just don’t want you to feel like you need to be a certain way.”

“I appreciate that, but I like the person I’ve become. I used to procrastinate, leaving both work and cleaning until the task was daunting, only making it worse for myself. I may wish I had gotten here another way, but I like who I am now… I wouldn’t want to find that old me again. Besides she would have never had the strength to leave Scott.” Katherine laughed harder than she meant to at that last bit and Rafael furrowed his brow. “Sorry…” she cleared her throat and then chuckled again, “but it’s kind of funny that his continual berating me over being efficient and keeping the house in order also somehow made me stronger. I mean at the time it didn’t feel that way, but looking back… I don’t know…” she exhaled, “maybe it was leaving him that made me stronger.”

“You’re sure?”

“Positive.” Katherine smiled while shoving a forkful of salad in her mouth.

 

School had finally settled into a familiar routine. Sure she was still spending too much of her evening mindlessly standing at the copier only to return to her room to accumulate data on her students, but at least she was taking most of her grading home. They had both been working in the home office the night before, Katherine with her grading spread out on her old couch and coffee table and Rafael more watching her than working himself at his desk across the room.

He had gone to bed long before she had and when his eyes slowly blinked open he smiled that his shifting hadn’t seemed to disturb her. Rafael slipped out of bed and showered. It was Saturday, the first in a while that they could both be as lazy as they wanted. Katherine had even mentioned that she finally felt caught up, aside from grading. She hadn’t moved when he emerged from the bathroom dressed and ready for the day, so he let her sleep.

“You could have woken me.” Katherine yawned, walking into the kitchen to pour herself a cup of coffee.

“You haven’t had more than five hours of sleep consecutively since school started back up. There’s no way I was waking you.” He smirked when she sat across from him at the sage table, her hair messy and still in her pajamas.

“Thank you.” She smiled while taking a sip of her coffee.

“Did you want to do anything today or just have a lazy day around the house?”

“Can we go out for lunch and maybe go for a walk around Central Park?”

“We can.” The lines around Rafael’s eyes crinkled as he glanced at her pajamas and bed hair.

“I’ll get ready.” She muttered while the lines around her own eyes crinkled.

After drying her hair, Katherine slipped on a pair of olive green shorts and a looser fitting reddish orange shirt. Rafael had dressed down, a pair of khaki shorts and a dark blue V neck, so there was no need to dress anyway but comfortable.

“You want to walk?” Rafael smiled when she joined him in the living room again.

“That sounds nice.”

When they got to the street, Rafael took her hand in his. He was dressed nothing like the ADA she had met, but by now she was used to seeing this more relaxed side of him. She liked seeing him comfortable, the stress of work no longer present on his face, replaced instead by a bit of scruff.

“Where do you want to eat?”

“Hmmm…” Rafael thinned his lips while looking down the street in thought.

Katherine chuckled and tugged him after her as she set out in the direction of Central Park. “You’re cute when you’re indecisive.”

“We haven’t picked something.”

“I’m sure we can find something once we get closer.”

“I like knowing where I’m headed.” He grumbled.

“Think of it as an adventure.”

“And if we don’t find something?” He gave her a disapproving look and she rolled her eyes.

“Then I guess we’ll starve.”

 

Katherine snaked her arm around his waist as they walked along a path close to the lake. Lunch had been exceptional, but Rafael hadn’t mentioned anything about the food one way or another, which wasn’t exactly like him.

“You like lunch didn’t you?”

“It was fine.” He shrugged.

“My food was fantastic.”

It had been a little whole in the wall that she’d suggested and he begrudgingly agreed to after she teased him for not being adventurous enough.

“I’m glad.”

“Should I add it to the list of places we can go back to or is it a place I should drag Amanda if I want to go back.” She knew he liked his food, if he hadn’t there would have been complaining and possibly an ‘I told you so’ moment.

“We can go back sometime.”

“We can?” Katherine bit her lip as she smiled at him and he shook his head.

“I know what you’re doing?”

“And what’s that?”

“Trying to get me to admit I was wrong to judge the place before we got inside.” He gave her an amused little side eye and she grinned.

“You have to admit the food was amazing.”

“It was probably the best thing I’ve eaten in the last month.” Rafael chuckled.

“So you’d go back?”

“Definitely.”

“Maybe we should take my mom when they visit… you know, just to see the look on her face when we walk up.” Katherine looked entirely too pleased with the idea of this.

“Did you ever decide on whether they are staying with us or not?”

“Oh… I called her last week and invited them to stay in the guest room. Christmas is easier if we’re all under one roof.”

“Is she excited?”

“Through the moon.” Katherine chuckled. “It’ll be nice though, she can help with last minute wedding things and decorations.”

“We can host Christmas lunch or I can take everyone out. Which would you prefer?”

“My dad offered to take us and your mom and abuelita out for dinner on Christmas Eve, I’m pretty sure my mothers already booked the restaurant, but I’d like to do something traditional on Christmas itself.”

“Traditional for you or me?” He chuckled, the foods at his Christmases growing up were hardly what he figured she had in mind.

“A bit of both.” Katherine shrugged.

“My mom would be more than happy to help cook.”

“Three cooks in the kitchen? No way that could go wrong.” Katherine smirked.

“Only three?”

“My mom doesn’t really cook. Breakfast, brunch… she can toast bread and cut up fruit, maybe scrabble and egg if you aren’t too picky. I wouldn’t trust her with an actual meal.”

“I’ve cooked along side both you and my mother and I can guarantee you two will get along fine in the kitchen.” He pulled her to sit next to him on a bench and interlaced their fingers. “How does your mom feel about the wedding date?”

Katherine exhaled and looked to the sky. “She thinks New Years Eve is not a day you have as your anniversary. I told her it’s the day we picked and if she didn’t like it she could stay in Atlanta.” Rafael bit back a chuckle. “She quickly backtracked, deciding that we’d always have a celebration to attend if we wanted.” Katherine chuckled. “I can’t wait to tell her I may not wear a white dress.”

“What color would you wear instead?”

“I’ve been thinking about burgundy, but I’ve also looked at a few white dresses that aren’t traditional wedding dresses… I haven’t made up my mind yet.”

“What color suit do you want me to wear?”

“I love that all I have to do is walk in your closet and I can find the exact color I’m looking for.” Katherine pushed up to kiss his cheek, but was met his lips instead.

They kissed for a moment, Rafael’s fingers running through her hair. “What color did you decide on?” he smiled softly, his eyes bouncing between hers.

“The dark navy suit, white shirt, with your burgundy tie and suspenders.”

“Burgundy socks too?”

“If you want.” She chuckled. “I thought I’d have Amanda up there with me, but only if you want someone up there too?”

“I could ask Liv, unless you think a female would be weird.”

“I think it’d be cute actually, and she makes the most sense. See if she’s good with wearing a burgundy dress, any style is fine. I’ll make Amanda wear a navy one and I think I will wear white.” Katherine was envisioning the colors in her head and liking the winter idea more and more.


	33. Chapter 33

 

“Jesus you’re huge.” Katherine laughed when Amanda not so gracefully sat herself in the chair across from her.

“If getting back up didn’t take so much effort, I’d leave you to eat lunch alone.” Amanda grumbled.

“No you wouldn’t.” Katherine smiled, ignoring the glare coming from Amanda. “I can assume everyone at work knows you’re pregnant?”

“Even Deputy Chief Dodds,” Amanda rolled her eyes, “Liv had been somewhat lenient until he saw me… now I’m firmly stuck at my desk.”

“Are you going to Francie Barnes engagement party?”

“Our moms are flying up together.” Amanda had a forced smile plastered on her face, the same one Katherine was used to seeing on her face when her mother was around.

“At least we’ll have each other.” Katherine chuckled.

“Why are they dragging us to this anyway? It’s their friends daughter… I think I’ve met Francie maybe three times total…”

“It’s your moms opportunity to remind you you aren’t married, and mines to remind me that people celebrate the fact that they’re getting married.”

“They are nothing if not passive aggressive.” Amanda muttered.

“At least they decided to share a hotel room and not stay with their respective daughters.” Katherine laughed at the face Amanda made at the thought of her mom sleeping on her couch.

“You know what would help get me through a visit with my mom?”

“What?” Katherine smirked.

“Alcohol.” Amanda grumbled.

 

Their mothers had arrived early on Thursday, while both Amanda and Katherine were stuck at work. They had thankfully not made a big fuss over either taking time off to pick them up, instead opted to take a cab to the hotel. The engagement party wasn’t until Saturday, but since Natalie and Beth Anne had travelled together, they decided they could do some sight seeing while their daughters were working and make a long weekend out of the trip.

“You brought Sonny…” Katherine whispered, when Amanda walked into the restaurant’s waiting area with Carisi in tow.

“I am not having dinner with my mom, your mom, you, and Barba without some semblance of a date.” Amanda huffed back, her voice soft enough that only Katherine could hear.

“Amanda…” There was a disapproving tone to Katherine’s voice.

“He knows it’s not a date.”

“That’s not the point. He likes you, of course he agreed to a none date, date. It doesn’t make it less mean.”

Amanda frowned while watching Carisi as he talked effortlessly with her mother. “We’re friends Katherine… partners… you read too much into things.”

“Our table’s ready.” Rafael smiled as he took Katherine’s hand forcing the two of them to actually join the others.

“How excited are you for that grand baby to get here?” Natalie grinned as Amanda struggled to scoot her chair closer to the table.

“Very excited, I just hope Amanda has considered how hard being a single mother is going to be.” Beth Anne smiled.

“Wait, you mean keeping an infant alive with limited sleep is going to be hard?” Amanda said sarcastically.

Katherine, Rafael, and Carisi stifled a chuckle while Natalie and Beth Anne each gave her a disapproving look.

“Do you even know who the father is?” Beth Anne huffed.

“Yes mom, I know who the father is.”

“We’ll where is he?”

“Busy.” Amanda snapped.

“So, you’re going with Jesse as the name?” Natalie smiled. It was her way of lightening the tension a bit, something her singsong way of speaking effortlessly did.

“Yes.” Amanda breathed.

“It’s not short for Jessica?” Natalie questioned, almost condescendingly, while taking a sip of her drink.

“Mom…” Katherine whispered.

“What? Is it not?” Natalie’s eyes were wide, feigning innocents.

“Nope, just Jesse.” Amanda said, forcing a smile.

“You know, if you weren’t so sullen all the time perhaps the father wouldn’t be so busy.” Beth Anne stated.

“I’m fine on my own mom, really.”

“Of course you are…” She grumbled.

“Oh, Beth Anne… you should be happy for a grand baby at all, it’s not like either of them are getting any younger.” Natalie said, dismissively waving her hand through the air.

“No, that’s not pointed…” Katherine muttered. Rafael ran his hand into her lap, lacing his fingers with hers and softly smirked at her when she glanced at him. “You know, combined we make the perfect daughter.” Katherine jested, turning her attention back to Amanda.

“Engaged and knocked up.” Amanda snickered.

“Ideally you’d be married before getting knocked up…” Beth Anne muttered.

Amanda took a deep breath, closing her eyes in an effort not to roll them at her mothers comment.

“Carisi, how is studying for the bar going?” Rafael sat a little taller in his seat in hopes of taking the conversation off the two women and on to… well, anything else.

“You’re going to be a lawyer?” Beth Anne interjected before he could answer.

“Going to school for it,” Carisi nodded, “night classes.”

“What’s the relationship here?” Beth Anne’s finger pointed between the two of them as her eyes narrowed.

Amanda took Carisi’s hand in hers and pulled it above the table. “Mom… he’s my date.”

Katherine rolled her eyes, but was at least relieved to see Carisi seemed to be playing along just enough to make it believable, but not so much that he had his hopes up. Rafael on the other hand nearly choked on the sip of scotch he had taken as Amanda spoke.

“You ok?” Katherine chuckled.

“Yeah… sorry,” he glanced at Amanda and Carisi, and then Katherine, “must have swallowed wrong.”

Beth Anne knitted her brow unfavorably at Rafael’s disruption, and then turned back to her daughter and Carisi. “You don’t mind that she’s pregnant with someone else’s baby?”

“Mom!”

The corners of Carisi’s lips tugged a bit higher, but he didn’t smile. “I don’t mind.” His hand squeezed Amanda’s almost intimately and she snapped her head his direction again.

“You don’t?”

“I would think that was obvious by this point.” He smirked.

Katherine grinned when Amanda blushed, only pulling the grin back when Rafael leaned over to whisper in her ear. “When did they start dating?”

“They’re not… yet…” Katherine grinned again.

Rafael side eyed her, but let it go knowing she could explain better after dinner.

“I’m not dating Carisi.” Amanda stated before Katherine could open her mouth.

They had been at Francie Barnes engagement party, some over the top fancy gathering that had both and open bar and buffet, for almost an hour and this was the first time the two of them had a moment without their mothers.

“I didn’t say anything.” Katherine smiled.

“I know that look.”

“I just think the two of you spend a lot of time together for someone you’re not interested in.”

“He has a lot of experience with babies, his sisters have kids… or a sister has a kid... either way, he’s helping me out. As a friend. That’s it.”

“You really don’t see it?” Katherine furrowed her brow.

“See what?” Amanda huffed.

“He’s got a thing for you.”

“Now you’re just being ridiculous.” Amanda scoffed. “How much wine have you had?”

“Half a glass.” Katherine chuckled.

“Why would you say he has a thing for me?”

“Just the way he looks at you sometimes.” Katherine shrugged.

“And how’s that?”

“Like he wants more.”

“You’re crazy.” Amanda laughed.

“What is wrong with Sonny?”

“Nothing is wrong with him…”

“Then why won’t you even consider it?”

“Because I always screw my relationships up and...”

“You don’t want to screw things up with Sonny,” Katherine nodded, “I get that.”

“He’s become a really good friend.” Amanda exhaled.

“One day you’ll find someone that won’t let you screw things up... don’t be so scared of trying you never open yourself up to him.”

“And you think that someone is Carisi?”

“I think you should consider him.” Katherine smiled.

Amanda took a sip of water, half glaring at her friend and half mulling over what she had said. “He does seem to be interested despite knowing most of my flaws already…”

“Does that mean you’ll go out with him?” Katherine was grinning, but she liked Carisi and she thought he and Amanda would work well together.

“It means I’ll considerate it… maybe… after Jesse gets here.”

“Way to commit.”

“You’ll take what you get.”

“There you two are.” Natalie smiled as she walked up to them, Beth Anne not far behind her.

Amanda stretched her back as her mother used her finger to lift her face so she could examine it better.

“I have a facial cleanser you may want to use.” Her voice was critical and Amanda deflected just as critically.

“That real classy mom, what’d you find a corner to smoke in?”

Beth Anne held the champagne flute containing the cigarette butt higher and shrugged, “I went outside, but didn’t want to litter.”

“Katie, there’s a few people that want to say hello.” Natalie smiled, dragging her away from Amanda and her mother.

“Is this another attempt to show my ring off, because if it is I’m going to take it off and put it in my pocket.”

“Don’t be silly Katie. The whole point of being engaged is to show off your ring to people.”

“No,” Katherine huffed as she stopped them, “the whole point of being engaged is to eventually marry the man I’ve fallen in love with. It’s rude to show it off at someone else’s engagement party.”

“What do you care, you barely know Francie.”

Katherine inhaled deeply in an attempt to calm herself. “Look mom, I came because you asked me to, but I will leave if you lift my hand to one more person.”

“Fine, I’ll behave.” Natalie half whined, but she was true to her word. For the rest of the time they were there she didn’t bring up Katherines impending nuptials unless the person they were talking to happened to notice Katherine’s ring. If that happened, Katherine let her mother do most of the talking.

 

“How was the party?” Rafael asked giving her a curious look when Katherine half stumble into the living room while kicking her shoes off.

“I’m not that drunk,” she steadied herself on the back of the couch, “I just can no longer walk in those shoes.” She glared disappointingly at the offending heels and pushed them out of the way.

“Amanda got you home?”

“She did.” Katherine smiled, plopping down next to him on the couch. “Would it be rude to rescind my mothers invitation to stay here over the holidays?”

“Yes.” He chuckled.

“That’s a shame…”

“You’re mom isn’t nearly as bad as Rollins’,” Rafael muttered, “I almost feel I understand her attitude a bit more now.”

“Beth Anne runs circles around my mom.” Katherine sighed.

“Who was the engagement party for again?”

“Francie Barnes, Darlene’s daughter. My mom's been friends with Darlene as long as she's lived in Atlanta. Francie's nice. I mean, I’ve only met her twice not including today, and we are very different people, but she’s always been pleasant.”

“Pleasant?” Rafael chuckled when Katherine gave him an unamused look at his tease. “Come on,” he grinned, “let’s go to bed.”

“It’s not even nine…”

“I didn’t say we were going to sleep.” He smirked.

Katherine giggled as he dragged her behind him to their bedroom.


	34. Chapter 34

 

Katherine’s class had come along nicely. They could work independently, well as independently as any nine year old could, allowing her the opportunity to work with them in small groups. The Thanksgiving holiday was fast approaching and her students attention spans were quickly dwindling, but for the most part they were on task, her room was just a bit louder then normal. You choose your battles though. Kids talking while working was preferable to kids that were completely off task. It’s why she always planned fun activities for the days preceding a break. Something engaging that the students would enjoy working on while still actually learning something. She typically preferred to teach this way as opposed to worksheets, but she saved the more fun activities for times like these.

Their current math unit was on data, so she had tasked her students with finding out what country different items around their homes were made. They compiled their data as a class and then broke into smaller groups to figure out how to create a bar graph to display the information.

“Ms. Morgan?”

“Yes Hannah.” Katherine smiled up at her student from her chair at her small group table after finishing the note she was making on the progress the last small group she had worked with had made.

“My group thinks we’ve figure out how to create the graph.”

Katherine smiled and motioned for Hannah and the rest of her group that was standing behind her to sit. “What’s your plan?”

She loved this activity because it got her students thinking well above grade level since the bar graph was more complicated than they were expected to know. In addition to that, the whole class was determined to be the first to figure it out, because lunch in the classroom was the prize for the winning group.

“Along here we were thinking numbers.” Sammy said, pointing at the rough draft they had created.

“And what’s that called?” Katherine could tell by looking at their bar graph they had won, but she still wanted to make them work for it.

“The y-axis.” Jarod answered.

“What numbers are going along the y-axis?”

“How many of each item were made in a certain country.” Hannah said.

Katherine nodded. “Ok, and how are you going to differentiate between the different countries?”

“Along the x-axis,” Sammy smiled at her when he used the correct vocabulary word, “we thought we’d put the names of each country there.”

“Ok,” Katherine nodded again, “but how will we know what came from which country?”

“We’ve broken the items down by categories,” Hannah replied while pointing to the key they had made with school supplies, clothing, electronics, toys, amongst a handful more. The categories had been color coded to match what they had drawn on their graph. “We were thinking we could group the categories over each country.”

“I think that’ll work.” Katherine smiled.

“So does that mean we’ve won?” Jacob asked.

“It does. Tomorrow I’ll meet you in the cafeteria to bring you up here after you’ve made it through the lunch line.”

An excited yes emitted from the small group, while groans could be heard from the rest of the class.

“Can we watch Home?” Hannah grinned.

“Twenty five minutes of it.” Katherine chuckled, knowing they wouldn’t really care that they wouldn’t get to finish the movie. “Ok, now you get to explain to the class what you’ve come up with.”

The group presented their bar graph, explaining it as best they could, Katherine helping out with academic vocabulary when needed. She then guided them through narrowing down the categories, suggesting an other to account for some of the more extraneous items.

With a plan in place, the class quickly started to divide up the task of creating a large version in the hall. Some groups worked in the room, using construction paper to create labels for the graph while others started building it in the hall. The only thing Katherine helped with was the duct tape she used to create the two axes of the graph in the hall.

Instead of pulling another group, she monitored the work being done. Ensuring that the kids in the hall were being respectful of other class while also checking to see that everyone was participating. The grades on this particular activity would be fairly lenient, but she still intended to pull a few from it.

Katherine was standing in her doorway when MJ walked by on her way to the restroom.

“You know the fifth grade hall has a bathroom.” Katherine half scolded while smiling.

“Mrs. Rydel asked me to take a book to Mr. Dunlap.” MJ smirked.

“Likely story.” Katherine grinned as her phone vibrated in her back pocket. She glanced at it but didn’t recognize the number so she shoved it back in her pocket.

“This was my favorite assignment last year.” MJ smiled, while watching Katherine’s class work.

“Were you on the winning team?” Hannah asked, stopping to chat instead of continuing into the class room.

“I was.” MJ nodded.

“MJ’s probably why her team won.” Katherine chuckled, pulling her phone out when it rang again. It was the same number and this time a little voice inside her head pushed to answer it. “Hello?”

“Katherine, it’s Sonny… I mean Carisi.”

“I know you as Sonny,” she chuckled while shooing MJ back to class.

“Ok… good… um…”

“I’ve got twenty nine and ten year olds to contend with so you’re going to have to be quick.”

“Right. Amanda’s in labor and she asked me to call you. She was hoping you could come up here when school let out.” He sounded anxious, like he was the one moments away from becoming a parent.

“Are you at the hospital with her now?” She heard Amanda groaning in pain and didn’t wait for his response. “Tell her I’ll be there as soon as I can, and Sonny…”

“Yeah?”

“Stay with her.”

“I wasn’t planing on going anywhere.” He had smiled when he spoke, it was obvious even over the phone.

“Thanks.”

Katherine grinned and shoved the phone back in her pocket, wishing the day away faster.

 

When she finally made it home Rafael was working in the office. Katherine quietly entered the room, smiling back at him when he smirked at her, and moved behind him, running her hands across his shoulders as she leaned over the back of his chair to hug him.

“Amanda had her baby?”

“She did, a tiny perfect little baby girl.” Katherine sighed.

Rafael paused his work and turned so he could see her better. “What’s up?”

“Nothing.” Katherine shrugged, pushing her bottom lip up as she sat in his lap.

“You want a baby, is that it?” He was smirking and Katherine shifted to straddle him.

“No, not right now. I guess I just thought out of me and Amanda, that I’d be the first to have a kid. I’m happy for her, and ecstatic to spend time with that tiny baby, I’m just…”

“A little sad too?” Rafael ran his hand though her hair, looking softly up at her.

“It’s selfish and silly, but yes.”

“We can talk about kids if you want?”

“Yeah… I know… but I’m not ready yet. I like things the way they are with you and me… I just worry sometimes that I’m never going to be ready…”

“And if you’re not, if things stay like they are?”

Katherine smiled while staring at her hand, the one he had taken in his and was running his thumb across the back of. “I really can’t imagine being any happier than I am now.”

Rafael leaned forward in his chair, pressing his lips to hers while slipping his arm around her waist. Katherine grinned into the kiss when he hummed lightly while drawing her closer.

“I’m not opposed to practicing.” He panted, pulling back just enough to give her a cheeky grin.

“Practicing, huh?” She chuckled.

“So we’re prepared, you know… when we do decide we’re ready.” Rafael slip his hand under her shirt, his fingers lightly skimming up her stomach.

“Are you afraid you’ll forget how?” She still sounded amused, but he had moved on from the playful banter he had started, instead his intense eyes stared at her as he pulled her shirt over her head. The bra was next to go, landing in the floor next to her shirt.

“I thought you had a lot of work.” Katherines breath caught as his lips latched onto her breast, his tongue flicking, then swirling her nipple.

“Nothing that I can’t finish later.” He pushed her to stand, his fingers unfastening her slacks so he could tug both them and her underwear down her thighs.

Rafael didn’t move from where he sat, merely moved the file he had been reading from behind her and guided her to sit on his desk. Katherine glanced down at him as lifted her legs, resting a foot on an armrest of his chair. She continued to watch as he leaned forward to kiss her inner thigh, slowly making his way to her center, licking softly once he reached it.

His work, Amanda… babies… none of that was cluttering either of their minds anymore, only the moment they were in and the pleasure she was receiving. His tongue swirled her clit and her hips jerked forward. He repeated the motion and Katherine, who was using her elbows for support, took one hand and ran it through his hair, gripping tightly when he caused her pelvis to twitch again.

Rafael drew her sensitive nub between his lip, sucking gently as he slid his tongue against it, smiling to himself when she groaned and yanked at his hair. The torment was continued until Katherine was a quivering mess on his desk. Her thighs squeezing against his ears. The hand no longer in his hair, instead joined with the other one covering her face in a failed attempt to muffle her moans.

“Raf… please…” She panted, but he couldn’t hear her.

He knew she was close and pressed on until he felt her body shudder and her moans quickly turn to groans, her hand back, pushing at his head.

“Come here.” He breathed, tugging her off the desk once his slacks and underwear pooled at his ankles.

Katherine straddled him again as he shifted lower in his chair, his lips finding hers as he guided her onto him. She lifted and lowered as best she could and his hands gripped her ass, letting her control the pace.

“Dios, te amo. (God, I love you.)” Rafael grunted when she sat up, giving herself a better leverage.

“I love you too.” She breathed, smiling down at him when he smirked up at her.

His hands gripped her hips, while the rest of him relaxed back in his chair to enjoy her movements. When her tempo became labored and her breaths short, Rafael began pumping from below, his hands holding her hips in place long after she had collapsed against him again. A few more thrust and he was panting as hard as she was, their bodies sated and at rest.

“Do you want me to make a quick dinner while you finish up in here?” Katherine smiled as she pulled back to look at him, her hand running through the mess she had made of his hair.

“Yes.” He smirked while lifting her with a little thrust of his hip.

Katherine chuckled and kissed him as she reluctantly lifted herself from him. “I’ll come get you when it’s ready.” She smiled while gathering her clothes.

“Ok.” Rafael watched as she carried her bundle of clothes down the hall, disappearing into their bedroom. Only then did he redressed himself, sighing as he flipped the file back open.

 

Katherine followed Rafael and Lucia up the stairs to his Abuelita’s place. The year before they had done Thanksgiving at his moms, this year it would be at Catalina’s. Rafael had explained that his mother and grandmother traded off hosting every year, even though it was just the three of them, and they both did the same amount of work regardless of where they held it… and then he had rolled his eyes. Katherine had chuckled, but mostly at his mild annoyance. She didn’t care where they spent Thanksgiving as long as she was with him.

“Hola mamá,” Lucia smiled as she let the three of them into Catalina’s apartment, “look who I dragged with me.”

“Rafi.” Catalina smiled, when he poked his head around his mother.

“Me and Katherine.” Rafael grinned as he guided Katherine further into the small apartment.

“Me hace feliz verte feliz. (It makes me happy to see you happy.)” Catalina pulled him into a hug.

“Yo estoy feliz. (I am happy.)” He smirked.

Catalina smiled as she looked him up and down and then moved on to Katherine. “You seem pretty happy too.”

“Should I not be?” She chuckled, leaning down to give the older woman a hug.

“What can we do to help with the wedding?” Lucia asked as she led the group to sit in the living room.

“Show up.” Katherine shrugged.

They were keeping things fairly simple, mostly it was a New Years Eve party at this point. Carisi had mentioned becoming ordained online for his one of his sister’s wedding and offered to officiate. It was an offer that Rafael had initially scoffed at. Katherine convinced him to at least look into where he had been ordained online before dismissing him, and then reminded him that the fact that he was Catholic would sit nicely with Lucia. After careful research into whether they would be legally married, Rafael had finally caved when he realized how excited Katherine was about the idea of someone they both knew performing the ceremony.

“You have to need some help.” Lucia wasn’t exactly the type to just show up for her son’s wedding.

“Helping out with Christmas lunch the week before is more than enough. My mom thrives in party planning.” Katherine chuckled. “I’m not sure I’m going to have to do anything.”

“Still…” She pushed.

“If you really want to you can come over early, but at that point my mom will have taken over and you may regret your willingness to be helpful.” Katherine was serious about her mother taking over but still had a playful smile on her face.

“The cake?” Lucia questioned.

“The order’s been placed with the bakery for a month now.” Rafael smiled.

Lucia opened her mouth to speak again, but Catalina beat her to it. “Lucia, don’t be pushy.”

“I’m not being pushy. I’m trying to be helpful.”

“Rafi, will you call your mother if you think of something you need her to do?” Catalina smirked.

“I promise mami,” he smiled, kissing her cheek as he comforted a less than amused Lucia, “I will find you a task to help with.”

“Was that so hard.” Lucia grumbled while leaning her cheek toward her son.

Catalina rolled her eyes and stood. “We need to get going on dinner if we want to eat before midnight.” Lucia stood as well, joining her mother by the door leading to the kitchen. “Katherine feel free to make yourself at home, Rafi can show you how to work the TV if you two want to watch something.”

Lucia and Catalina ventured into the kitchen and Katherine turned to Rafael with a small smirk on her face. “Is the TV that complicated?”

“For her it is.” He chuckled, pulling her closer on the couch.

“Do you mind if we watch the game?”

“You mean football?” One eyebrow was raise as he failed to hide his amusement.

“I am originally from Texas.”

“Yes, but you’ve never mentioned anything about football before… I just didn’t expect you to suddenly want to watch it.” He smirked.

“It’s not so much that I want to watch football… there’s just something about the game being on in the background… I don’t know. I mean we always went out on Thanksgiving, so it’s not like it’s a Thanksgiving memory, but my dad would watch the Cowboys on the weekends when I was younger, back when they were winning Superbowls… I guess I’m just being nostalgic.” Katherine shrugged.

Rafael picked up the remote and started flipping through channels. “Are they even playing today?”

“The Cowboys play every Thanksgiving, I have no idea what time though.”

The game was well into the second quarter when they finally found the channel, but that really wasn’t important. The fact that the Cowboys were loosing by twenty points didn’t really matter either. It was more about the background noise the game offered. Katherine was barely even watching it as she and Rafael bounced between the living room and the kitchen, helping out when needed.

Catalina kicked them both out of the kitchen when Rafael stole one too many croquettes off the plate she planned to serve them on and they both returned to the couch, Rafael tugging her under his arm.

“This is nice.” Katherine smiled.

“Being yelled at by my abuelita or snuggling on the couch?” He smirked.

“Both.” Katherine chuckled when he did. “The small intimate Thanksgiving with your mom and grandmother… it’s nice.”

“It is isn’t it.” Rafael smiled.

Katherine nodded and scooted closer to him, draping her arm across his stomach as she rested her head on his shoulder. She couldn’t imagine being anywhere else or with anyone else… even her own family. Not that she wouldn’t want her parents around for Thanksgiving. She just really liked the idea of family getting together more casually than going out to eat. There was something inviting about it. His mother and grandmother bickering as they cooked, giving the two of them little smiles as they passed. Rafael continuing to steal bites of food, smirking while being scolded for it. She could almost picture children playing on the floor of theliving room in front of them. It was a thought she mildly scolded herself for having while simultaneously squeezing Rafael tighter under her arm.


	35. Chapter 35

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm pretty sure I've pictured Leslie Ann Warren, or at least every mom she's ever played, as Katherines mom since I started writing her. Then I found this picture of her with Bob Newhart and he is now what I picture for her father.

 

Rafael spent the morning working in his office, diligently writing his closing argument until the smell of freshly baked cookies became too much to ignore. He stood almost out of sight as he watched her slide the last batch of cookies into the oven and then start arranging the counter so she could decorate. She pulled a batch of cooled cookies in front of one of the chairs at the kitchen island and lined the plastic cups with different colored royal icing along the top of her work space. He smiled when she set down, her posture giving the air of focus, and started outlining her designs on a cookie, working in assembly line fashion so that the first cookie would be dry by the time she got back to it and she could change colors.

“Are you making cookies for the whole school?” Katherine jumped when he spoke, but he had waited until she had set the piping bag down.

“I know it’s a mess,” she exhaled, looking a little concerned as she glanced at the kitchen. The mixing bowls were piled up in the sink, varying in colors that matched her icing, flour was on the counter surrounding the parchment paper she had used to roll the dough out on, and cookies were laid out on any flat surface she could find to cool. “I promise I’ll restore the kitchen to how it looked before I started.”

“I have no doubt that you will.” He smirked, wrapping his arms around her from behind and kissing the top of her head.

He could actually feel her tension ease as she leaned back against his chest.

“Do you want one?”

“It’s why I left my office.”

Katherine chuckled and stood, moving to the dining room table where she was letting her finished cookies fully dry. “Here.” She smiled, handing him one of her uglier cookies. Having not even attempted this in her tiny apartment the year before, her piping skills had needed a few warm up cookies.

“Great,” he smirked, “I get the discards.”

“They’ll taste the same.”

He smiled and followed her back to the island to watch her work again. “What’s the small box for?”

Katherine had a few larger Tupperware containers laid out to put the cookies in and one smaller, more decorative box.

“It’s for MJ. I’m going to fill it with cookies for her since she spends her mornings in my room. I also bought her a few books to put with it.”

“That’s sweet of you.”

“I’m a sweet person.” She smiled.

“I was thinking…”

“You’re always thinking.” Katherine was still playfully smiling, but had resumed decorating her cookies.

“This is true…”

“What were you thinking?” She chuckled between cookies.

“The food for our wedding… what did you and your mother come up with?”

“We were planning to arrange those cute wooden cutting boards I found on the kitchen island, using wooden crates to create elevation and make kind of a grazing table. A variety of meats, cheeses, crackers, breads, olives, fruits, different desserts… maybe some salmon, chicken, and beef skewers.”

“Would you mind if asked my mom to make a few things… croquetas, bocaditos, maybe pastelitos?”

“Would she want to after helping to cook at Christmas the week before?”

“You’re mother thrives in party mode… mine thrives on feeling needed and for us that usually defaults to something involving the kitchen.”

Katherine paused the toothpick she was using to smooth her fill icing. “I didn’t even think… my mom just kept bombarding me with ideas and she was actually listening to what I wanted for a change… I didn’t mean to leave your mom out.”

“I know,” Rafael smiled, “she’s my mom… I should have said something.”

“The only thing the kitchen will be used for that day is to cook the meat skewers. Your mom is more than welcome to cook here if she wants.”

“She can enlist my abuelita as her sous chef.” He chuckled.

Katherine grinned. “Please tell me she will, because your mom and grandmother grumbling as they correct the other on how to cook something, might just be the perfect background noise as we get the apartment ready for guest.”

“That will get old eventually.” He smirked as he stole another cookie from her discard pile.

“I doubt it.” Katherine smiled, watching him chuckle while making his way back to his office.

 

“Rafael?” Katherine panted as he thrust into her.

He had put in for vacation, taking off the entire time she was out of school for winter break. This was partially so they could spend time before and after the wedding together, but it was mostly so they could have some alone time before her parents arrived.

“Yes.” He grunted.

“What time is it?”

“We have plenty of time.”

“That doesn’t tell me what time it is.”

Rafael exhaled in mild annoyance, but paused his movements so he could lift himself enough to glance at the clock. “It’s nine twenty.”

“Oh, ok,” she smiled, pulling him back to her lips, “plenty of time.”

He rolled his eyes as he kissed her, resuming the motion of his hips.

Her parents flight was scheduled to land at two and they hadn’t even made it out of bed yet. A lazy morning spent laying in each others arms until roaming hands had led to more. Katherine still wanted to shower and style her hair, not to mention eat a little something closer to what could be considered breakfast since she assumed her parents would want to eat shortly after they arrived.

 

Katherine waited patiently by the baggage claim assigned to her parents flight. She had brought a book, but was content to people watch, and the couple clearly arguing not far from her, the two that were speaking load enough for her to hear every word of the conversation, were not letting her down entertainment wise. They were bickering over him walking too fast and her having to basically jog to keep up with him, and that she wasn’t running all over New York. His counter was that she needed longer legs, not that that ended the argument. They were clearly tired from the flight and having one of those silly argument couples tend to have with added stress.

“Katie!” Her mothers high pitched voice pulled her attention from the couple.

Katherine waved, not feeling the need to yell back at her parents from halfway across the baggage claim area. Her father shook his head at her mothers giddiness, but smiled.

Natalie pulled her into a hug when they reached her. “I am so thrilled to spend Christmas with you.”

“I’m excited too, mom.” Katherine chuckled when Natalie let her go. “Hey dad.” She smiled, leaning in to give him a hug as well.

“Hi Sweetheart.” William started to say more, but Natalie pulled Katherine back to her and lifted her hand so she could inspect her engagement ring.

“It’s even prettier in person.” Natalie exhaled a bit more dramatically that was probably necessary.

“It really is pretty.” Katherine smiled, rotating her hand as she looked at it with her mother.

“Did you see her ring William?” Natalie dragged her hand closer to his face.

“I saw it the half million times you showed me the picture Kate sent you.” He shifted slightly and made as if examining the ring. “It’s very pretty.” The smirk he held was a shared one between him and Katherine. One they often made when humoring her mother.

The belt on the baggage claim started to turn as an announcement came overhead with flight information and carrousel numbers.

“Let grab your bags.” Katherine smiled.

“You’re sure Rafael is comfortable with us staying in your home?” Natalie questioned as they waited.

“He is,” Katherine chuckled, “and if he wasn’t, it’s a little late to make reservations somewhere at this point… at least somewhere you’d be willing to stay.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“That you’re picky.” Katherine grinned.

 

“This is your building?” Natalie smiled as the car stopped in front of a tall high rise and a doorman headed to open the car door.

“No… I just thought we’d stop here and walk the rest of the way.” Katherine chuckled.

“You don’t have to be rude.”

“I was teasing. Come on, grab your things.”

Katherine carried the two garment bags while her mother and father rolled their suitcases behind them. She guided them to the elevator and down the hall to their unit.

“Raf!” She called after they entered the small entry area.

He had stayed behind mainly because of the limited seating in the car, and while they all would have fit, with luggage he felt it might be a bit cramped.

“Hey,” he smiled, kissing the top of Katherine’s head as he took the garment bags from her. “Natalie. William.”

“Show us around.” Natalie grinned taking Rafael’s arm and dragging him into his own apartment.

Katherine chuckled, taking her fathers arm as they followed.

Rafael took them to the guest room first so they could drop they things off, hanging the garment bags in the closet as Natalie looked out the window.

“The restroom is just through here. It connects to the study, but we’ve lock our access from that room for now to give you two privacy.” Katherine held the door to the bathroom open. “There’s another half bath in the hall between the guest room and the study.”

Natalie grabbed Katherines arm and dragged her out of the room so she could give her ‘the full tour’ as Natalie had worded it, leaving William and Rafael behind.

“She’s going to asked to see your closet.” William stated.

“That’s fine.”

“She an unhealthy obsession with closets…” William trailed off slightly and Rafael chuckled.

“Do you want a scotch?”

“Yes.”

Rafael led them to the built in bar just of the living room and pulled out two tumblers. “I have options other than scotch if you’d prefer.”

“Scotch is fine.”

Rafael poured the amber liquid in the tumblers and returned the bottle to the shelf. He picked up his glass when William did, nerves getting the better of him when William didn’t say much.

“Should I have asked?”

“Asked what?” William furrowed his brow.

“I mean…” Rafael cringed slightly, “before I asked Katherine to marry me… should I have asked?”

William chuckled. It was the first time Rafael had seen much emotion on the mans face. “It wasn’t necessary. Kate’s happy, that’s what matters.”

They watched as Natalie dragged Katherine into another room.

“Who exactly is giving the tour?” Rafael smirked.

William chuckled again and set his tumbler down for a refill.

“I have to say,” Natalie grinned while leaning over the bar, “your place is even better than I’d imagined.”

“Thanks,” Rafael smiled, “wine?”

“White.” Natalie replied while turning to lean her back against the bar.

“Martini Katherine?”

“Please.” She exhaled.

“Your mother and grandmother will be joining us for Christmas Eve dinner and Christmas lunch?” Natalie asked as she took a sip of her wine.

“Yes mom, I told you six for the reservation.”

“I made it for six, I was just double checking.” Natalie shrugged, following the group when they moved to sit in the living room. “Your tree is too small.”

“My tree is fine mom.” Katherine sighed.

“The ceilings are high, they deserve a larger, more grandiose tree.”

“I like this tree.” Katherine grumbled, downing the rest of her martini.

“I’m just saying… for next year… a larger tree would suit the space better.”

Katherine took a few controlled breaths as Rafael took her glass from her to refill it. “When do you want to eat?”

“Anytime. We haven’t eaten since nine.” William replied.

Rafael handed her the new martini, smiling when she mouthed the words ‘bless you’ to him.

“We can go after these drinks if you want.” Rafael suggested.

“Let me go freshen up a bit then.” Natalie smiled, taking her wine with her as she left for the guest room.

 

Katherine slipped off her shoes and slid out of the dress she had worn to dinner, the one her mother had guilted her into putting on. She stretched a bit and then slipped into a t-shirt and pajama shorts.

“You look tired.” Rafael chuckled as she crawled in bed with him.

“Eight hours…”

“Eight hours what?”

“That’s how long my mom’s been here and I’m already exhausted.” Katherine groaned as his arms wrapped around her.

“Are you going to make nine more day?” He chuckled.

“Can we do a late check out on New Years Day? Just to give us some alone time.” Katherine smiled when he pulled her tighter.

“I’ll call an arrange it in the morning.”

“I love you.”

“Love you too.” He smiled, kissing her before tucking her against his chest to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had really thought I'd get to the wedding in this chapter but I haven't even made it to Christmas... It should be in the next one unless Christmas gets away from me.


End file.
